Seven years ago, our founder Necole Kane shook up the internet when she abruptly announced that she was shutting down her popular celebrity gossip blog, NecoleBitchie.com, to pursue a more purposeful path. As a result, xoNecole was born. Seven years later, Necole is making yet another bold move by saying goodbye to xoNecole and focusing on her next pursuit: helping women experience better periods.
Today, the media mogul and entrepreneur announced that she is passing the baton here at xoNecole.com, which will live on under its parent company Will Packer Media while Necole grows her period supplement brand, My Happy Flo, full-time. “As a brand, we are truly excited to see Necole flourish in this exciting new chapter of her career,” says Alix Baudin, President and COO of Will Packer Media. “With her product My Happy Flo, Necole has provided relief and education to so many women. Will Packer Media is proud of what Necole has done both at xoNecole and beyond, and we support her endeavors moving forward.”
As a serial entrepreneur, Necole is all too familiar with the grief that comes with saying goodbye to a business. Though this new time comes with a mixed bag of emotions, Necole is embracing change as she always has: with open arms. "I've grown so much as a person through the articles and the writers on xo," she says through our Zoom call. "So I am so thankful for every single contributor, every single person who has been on the team, and the staff that has been a part of the vision. Every single person matters that has gotten the brand where it is seven years later."
She continues: "I'm thankful to Will Packer Media for believing in me, allowing me to live my dreams of seeing my site grow to unimaginable heights while also allowing me to see what stability looked like for five years because I didn't know. I spent my whole career grinding and in survival mode as an entrepreneur. So those five years gave me a taste of what it felt like to at least be comfortable. And now I'm going back to uncertainty and discomfort, but that season is always necessary before the big reward comes."
Necole Kane launched My Happy Flo in 2021 inspired by a number of friends diagnosed with fibroidsJlavii Photography
To no surprise, My Happy Flo is a labor of love in every sense of the word. When Necole turned 35, she started questioning her legacy and didn’t want to be remembered solely for being a gossip blogger. With her mother passing away at the age of 41 from breast cancer, and Necole getting closer to her '40s herself, she decided to take preventative measures to safeguard her health. The year she decided to retire from celebrity gossip, she moved to Arizona to embark on a wellness journey. During that time, she started seeing a holistic doctor that completely changed the game for her. "I enrolled in holistic nutrition and hormone health certification programs and learned about what causes different forms of cancer and how to heal through foods and vitamins," she continues. " I was able to learn about the different hormonal imbalances and discovered that having an abundance of estrogen in your body, or estrogen dominance, contributes to breast cancer and fibroid growth. I felt like I unlocked this wealth of knowledge concerning our hormones and how it contributes to many reproductive conditions that I didn’t know before."
Starting a holistic supplement brand was an idea Necole had been mulling over while burying herself in research about plant-based remedies and vitamins. But it became urgent when four of her friends had been told by their doctor that a hysterectomy was the only solution for their fibroids - one of which was a newlywed hoping to start a family. "[Through research] I learned that 80% of Black women will be diagnosed with fibroids by the age of 50," Necole says. “Most of the women I’ve talked to feel as though their period concerns were being brushed off by their doctors, or they were being pushed on birth control that came with a long list of side effects and eventually made their conditions worse, so I just knew it was the right time to launch My Happy Flo. I didn't know how I was going to run a period brand while running a media company, but God worked things out. He was like, 'I'm going to give you the vision. And then I'm going to give you the tools to see this vision through.'"
JLavii Photography
My Happy Flo is a plant-based supplement made from a blend of all-natural ingredients including DIM (Diindolylmethane) and Indole-3-Carbinol found in cruciferous vegetables such as broccoli, cauliflower, kale, and cabbage. It also features essential vitamins and minerals like Vitamin D3, B12, Iron and Magnesium. The research-backed ingredients were curated with common nutrient deficiencies in black women in mind, and work together to improve hormonal balance, while helping to alleviate uncomfortable period symptoms like heavy bleeding, cramping, bloating, and mood swings. One customer even came back to report that her 11 fibroids had completely vanished after 6 months of taking My Happy Flo. Though Necole has yet to put advertising dollars behind what some reviewers have pegged as “a miracle in a bottle,” thousands of customers are already singing its praises. "We occasionally poll our customers and they’ve revealed that having a painful period affects their self-confidence, body image, intimacy, relationships, and job performance. So this product is about allowing them to have a better quality of life. And we do that by helping them improve certain aspects of their hormone health because our hormones rule everything."
While speaking with Necole, I noticed she is like an encyclopedia when it comes to vitamins, supplements, and hormonal health, and her face practically lights up as she talks about it. She is even enrolled in a menstrual cycle coach certification so that she can become an educator and empower her following. "I want to take a lot of my experience in media and translate that into My Happy Flo," says Necole. "I want the brand to feel like a girl’s night or happy hour with friends and you're talking about your health. For people to be able to talk about their period and reproductive health openly and honestly with no shame."
Above all, she wants to spread the word that period pain is not normal. "Our menstrual cycle is like the body’s report card and heavy bleeding and PMS symptoms is like our check engine light. It can be the first sign of an underlying condition," she insists. "There's just so many conditions [like] PCOS, endometriosis, fibroids, and even thyroid disorders [where] a painful period is the first sign of these underlying health conditions. It is not normal to bleed through tampons by the hour, or have periods lasting more than 7 days, but we have just learned to deal with it. These symptoms serve as a smoke alarm and is letting you know that there's a fire going on somewhere else in the body."
Divine intuition has never steered Necole Kane wrong. And though she's aware many will have questions about her next steps, she assures her followers that she's still here to serve. Moving forward, Necole has her sights set on building My Happy Flo into the megabrand that she believes it can be. On her wishlist is a full-fledged line of products with holistic solutions for PCOS, insulin resistance, hyperthyroidism, and other hormonal imbalances as well as in-person events, video content, and getting government funding to launch menstrual education programs in schools. Until then, she assures xoNecole readers that she's never too far away. "I want my community to know when they read this and see that I'm leaving, that I'm still here, but serving them in a different way."
To learn more about My Happy Flo visit My Happy Flo.co or follow them on Instagram!
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So, today? Today, we’re going to tackle how sex impacts us when it comes to our energy fields. What (mostly) inspired this is once reading a science-based article about how it is a fact and not a myth that just like plants can absorb energy from other plants, humans can do the same thing by being in the space of other human beings. And when you stop to really think about it, doesn’t that make all of the sense in the world?
Otherwise, there wouldn’t be terms out here like “peer pressure” and big grown folks wouldn’t be out here trying to look and act just like some of their favorite celebrities or IG influencers (and yet, on that point, I digress).
So, since energy impacts us in some pretty significant ways, let’s take a few moments to see how it goes down when it comes to copulation — just so that you’re (even more) aware of what you’re getting yourself into when you “do the do,” as far as your personal energy space is concerned.
Energy. Revisited.
GiphyOkay, so before we get all up in how energy is exchanged during sexual activity, what is energy as it relates to human beings, in general? Well, in some ways, it all depends on who you ask. For instance, the famed Greek philosopher Aristotle once said that energy is about having the capacity to do something. Some medical experts say that energy is all about how something impacts you on a mental or physical level.
For instance, negative energy tends to be very heavy and draining while positive energy can increase feel-good chemicals throughout your system which makes it easier for you to do things like be creative and problem-solve. Something else that I think is important to keep in mind as far as human energy goes is it’s impacted by a myriad of things including a person’s stress levels, how healthy a person is, what their life choices are (as far as how their decisions influence them) and even what their sleep patterns are like.
And if all of this is true, then something else that Aristotle once said about energy would be beyond accurate: “The energy of the mind is the essence of life.”
Energy is life. Whew, so if this is indeed the case, does this mean that when you choose to have sex with someone, you are sharing your life force — whatever state that may be — with someone as they are doing the same to/for/with you? YES.
What Does It Mean to Exchange Sexual Energy?
GiphySince I grew up in an entertainment industry household, I think that’s probably why I’ve ended up with some close friends who are in the industry as well. That said, I will never forget when I was talking to one of them one day about a particular artist. When I expressed how much sex appeal that she had, my (male) friend simply said, “Yeah, I’ve been in her presence a few times before. She has some really dark energy. I didn’t even hug her.”
Now from a scientific standpoint, dark energy is simply what causes the universe to accelerate in growth over a certain period of time; however, when a person is described to have dark energy, that usually means that they have an evil and/or negative and/or heavy and/or draining aura about them. And y’all, here’s what’s semi-wild about what he said: did you know that science backs that hugs do indeed transfer energy?
Yep, research reveals that a hug from someone can literally alter your brain and body chemistry — so you definitely need to be discerning about who you let up into your affection space. Straight up. And so, since a hug has the capacity to do that, how much more can SEX?
To further emphasize this, let’s begin with an article that I read on Healthline’s website entitled, “Do We Really Exchange Energy During Sex?” After checking it out, one of the main things that I appreciated was when a doctor who was interviewed for the piece said:
“Every sex act is an exchange of energy [because] every sexual act raises or lowers your energy level…Therefore, a sexual relationship isn’t a purely psychological or physiological, mechanical act…Rather, it’s an energetic action. When we have an intimate relationship with someone, the two energies merge.”
Okay, so according to science, when two people have sex, energies merge. Well, according to Scripture, when two people have sex, oneness transpires (Genesis 2:24-25). Let’s keep going.
There was once a Physician-scientist by the name of Wilhelm Reich (who actually died in prison, in part, because of his radical beliefs on sex and orgasms during his time), who once said that having a healthy sex life (which, to him, including orgasms and is what he referred to as “orgastic potency”) is what played a huge role in one’s emotional health and well-being. That’s because, to him, without the release of sexual energy, neurological disorders would be come to be.
My takeaway from this is when you think about the fact that things like serotonin, dopamine, and the “the bonding chemical” oxytocin are all released during sex (and most certainly during orgasms), and also since sex (and orgasms) reduce stress — you need to tend to your sexual energy for the sake of your holistic health. Let’s continue on.
After reading an article on sexual energy on Cosmo’s website in which one of the sex therapists said that “our sexuality is our power" and then reading an article on the same topic on Well + Good’s platform where another expert stated that, “Many belief systems believe sexual energy is an expression of the soul's connection to the cosmos and the rest of the universe”, I thought about the word “power” and then “soul connection.”
At the end of the day, power isn’t just ability but the capability to influence and even take authority over something or someone. And a soul connection? Several years ago, when I penned a piece for the platform entitled, “I’ve Got Some Ways For You To Start Pampering Your Soul,” one of the things that I made sure to emphasize is your soul IS also your life. This means that soul connections are life connections.
And so, it would appear that sharing sexual energy also means that you are making a life connection with someone. And that type of connection has the power to influence you in ways that you couldn’t even begin to imagine. That is how deep exchanging sexual energy is.
What You Should Always Keep in Mind Before Sharing Sexual Energy with Someone Else
GiphyNow are there degrees to this whole sexual energy thing? Of course. The type of connection that a husband and wife of 20 years can make via sex is very different than a one-night stand. However, it would appear that science believes that it doesn’t really matter what you tell yourself about sex with someone (or even how many condoms you may use during sex) — potent energy is exchanged regardless.
That’s a huge part of the reason why I will forever roll my eyes about how ridiculous “casual sex” sounds to me, because, although I do believe that it is very possible to engage in coitus that has no real purpose (casual is purposeless, by definition), what isn’t possible is for there not to be a significant connection made from a scientific standpoint. Because again, if a mere hug can alter you (shoot, a handshake too), do you really think that allowing a man’s penis into the sacred space known as your vagina will not? After reading all of this…do you really?
When it comes to energy, author T. Harv Eker once said, “Energy is contagious: either you affect people or you infect people.” With all that was just shared about sexual energy, each and every person you choose to “engage” with, they are either going to affect you or infect you — just with their energy alone.
Knowing this, if there was ever a time to choose wisely, this would be it.
Your energy is your power. Who you exchange power with? CHOOSE WISELY.
EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON.
And because energy can shift…be cognizant of what you’re doing…EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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Featured image by Giphy