Everything You Need To Know About This Year's Second Mercury Retrograde & What It Means For Your Sign
The second out of the four Mercury retrogrades happening this year is occurring this month, and this Mercury retrograde is a reality check. Mercury was formerly in the earth sign Taurus and will be in retrograde from April 21 until May 14. To get down to the basics of what this particular Mercury retrograde is going to feel like, we examine Taurus. Taurus is a sign dedicated to groundedness, patience, and love, and enjoys all of the earthly pleasures this life has to offer. Taurus is also aligned with finances, and financial drama is more likely during this time. This Mercury retrograde is a big learning opportunity when it comes to defining where your true values and priorities are and how you could be getting in the way of not only accomplishing your goals but enjoying yourself too.
Over the next few weeks, the universe is asking you, how willing are you to remain patient for your seeds to bloom? If you knew what you wanted was going to come true for you, how would you act or move in the meantime? Would you enjoy your life more and find more gratitude, confidence, and stability today? This Mercury retrograde transit is overall a great time for some extra TLC, rest, open-mindedness, and flexibility. Mercury will be forming a conjunction with Uranus during this transit, and you can expect the unexpected. Things are shaking up during this Mercury retrograde, and once Mercury goes direct, a lot of people will find themselves on new ground and more aligned and assured with their path.
ARIES
Mercury retrograde will be in your financial zone, and this is the time to put a little more precaution when it comes to finances, spending, and investments. You could be spending more than planned during this time or experiencing some unexpected financial revelations. Mercury retrograde will be showing you new avenues of wealth but also the importance of honoring your values and that you are worthy of all you want in life. Do things that make you feel confident and that align with your self-esteem, and know that the stability you are seeking right now will come from within first and foremost. You are finding new ground during this Mercury retrograde.
TAURUS
This Mercury retrograde is occurring in your sign during your season, and you are going to be feeling this one the most, Taurus. This Mercury retrograde overall for you is about personal growth, clarity, and re-discovering who you are. You are going through a journey of the soul during this transit and will be learning more about yourself, your needs, and your goals in the process. You could be feeling a little misunderstood at times during this retrograde, and you will be getting an opportunity to get your message clear and find your voice and way of expression that feels good for you. It’s about honoring this growth and development you have been going through and seeing yourself in a new, more favorable, and accepting light.
GEMINI
Your ruling planet goes retrograde, and this time for you is all about getting closure. The past may be coming up more than usual for you right now, and you are getting the opportunity to heal, accept, and let go once and for all. This Mercury retrograde for you overall is a time of unpacking. Since Mercury will be moving through your 12th house, things get deep, and your emotional world will be feeling a little more enhanced. This Mercury retrograde will be a catalyst for change for you, and you are getting more time away for yourself and your mental health.
Acknowledge what is coming up for you, but don’t let it control you.
CANCER
Over the next few weeks, you will be diving deeper into your dreams and aspirations, sense of community, friendships, and happiness. Friendships are going through a growth spurt, and you are getting clarity on who your people are and who you want to surround yourself with. There may be some more conflicts with others on the horizon, but overall this transit is about defining what friendship means to you, getting re-inspired, and trusting your gut instincts. Divine intervention is coming into play, and you are getting the opportunity to see more clearly the path you are headed on, who you are headed there with, and if that’s what truly inspires and fulfills you.
LEO
Your career, public life, reputation, and professional world are being influenced by Mercury retrograde during this time, and you will be taking a look at your current goals and where you are headed with them. There could be some more bumps in the road than expected when it comes to career goals but know that this is all temporary. Life tends to feel a little more public or out in the open when Mercury is in retrograde in your 10th house, and you may be thinking more about the way you are being perceived. Know that this time for you is overall about getting a better understanding of how you want to show up and what the next steps for you are within your career or public life.
VIRGO
This Mercury retrograde is an awakening for you, Virgo. Your ruling planet is Mercury, so whatever it is doing in the sky is especially influential for you. During this particular Mercury retrograde, your 9th house of travel, adventure, education, and spirituality are in the spotlight, and you are overall finding your way. You could feel like the path you have planned for yourself isn’t playing out exactly how you expected, and you are learning the importance of being flexible and finding your strength and sense of purpose within. You could be feeling tested to have more faith and to believe more in yourself and what you are trying to pursue, and it’s all about gaining direction for you right now. Expect help from unexpected places, and open your mind, Virgo.
LIBRA
Intimacy, transformation, commitment, and shared finances are being highlighted for you during this Mercury retrograde. You are moving through a journey of seeing where your time and energy have been spent and how you are feeling about the return you are seeing in your life for the work you are putting in. Imbalances within a romantic relationship, platonic or business, will become more apparent to you right now, and you are gaining the necessary clarity to make some important changes. You are moving through a transformative time in your life, and you will feel a deep sense of renewal, freedom, and rebirth once Mercury goes direct on May 14.
SCORPIO
With Taurus being your sister sign, this Mercury retrograde is happening exactly opposite of you, in your 7th house of love and partnership. You are taking a look at the relationship you have with yourself and how your partnerships and relationships with others are flowing for you right now. It’s all about finding the balance between the giving and receiving in your life and about allowing love to grow. You don’t have to do life alone, and although you could be feeling more distant from love or the people close to you right now, you are addressing where you’ve been holding yourself back and how to experience more love, connection, and harmony.
Let the past go, define where you want to go now.
SAGITTARIUS
Your work life, routine, health, and daily schedule are being addressed during this time, and you are creating some new structure here. This Mercury retrograde is about looking at your current daily plan and routine and looking for ways to improve here or develop a new system that is more effective for you. The vibes in the office could be feeling a little tense for the time being, but you are overall getting the opportunity to retrace your steps, re-do any errors, and break the ice with colleagues. This is a good time to learn a new skill, develop your skills, and work passionately on something that inspires you.
CAPRICORN
Listen to your heart, and learn more about it, Capricorn. Mercury retrograde will be pushing you to be more open, to ask for what you need emotionally, and to feel more confident taking up space and expressing yourself. You are reviewing where the happiness is in your life and if you’ve been prioritizing this enough for yourself. Any limitations you have been feeling creatively and romantically come up at this time to be reviewed, healed, and understood better. Once Mercury goes direct on May 14, you will have a better understanding of what makes you happy, making it easier to be in those spaces.
This Mercury retrograde is a journey of the heart for you.
AQUARIUS
Mercury retrograde will be bringing attention to the home. You are taking a look at your foundations, where you are feeling supported and stable in your life, and where you want to continue to grow your roots and build. Your emotional well-being is the priority, and your safe spaces are where to be to get through this time. Some misunderstandings with family or close loved ones are more likely now, and you are getting a clear view of how you’ve been feeling within when it comes to the past, family, and your environment. Your stability in life and how you feel grounded in it all are in focus right now, and overall this is a good time for you to declutter, finish that home project, and bring peace into the home.
PISCES
Communication is everything right now, Pisces. Extra patience is needed when it comes to communicating with others, and be sure to think things through and watch out for impulsivity. The more grace you can give yourself and others right now, the better. Journal your thoughts, meditate, and heal the mind. Mercury retrograde will be showing you how powerful your words are and what kind of mark you want to leave on people and the world when connecting. It is about overcoming previous communication challenges and seeing what has been blocking you from feeling heard. This Mercury retrograde transit is requiring more patience than most, and travels, contracts, texts, and emails should all be looked over a few times right now.
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Tayler Barakat is a Mystic who has studied Astrology for over a decade. She does intuitive astrology and tarot readings for people all over the world, and her work focuses on healing and empowering individuals. Follow her on Instagram @taylerbarakat_ and check out her website www.listentothevirgo.com.
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From Monogamy To Polyamory: 'I'm In An Asexual Poly Marriage With My Husband Of 7 Years'
Have you ever wondered what it's like to be asexual and in an open marriage? Relationship Coach Mikki Bey shared her first-hand experience with us as well as answered some of our burning questions.
Like a lot of people, Mikki met her now husband, Raheem Ali, online. As soon as they met, they instantly fell in love and got engaged on their first date. Just 90 days after they met, the couple tied the knot and have now been married for seven years. Raheem and Mikki aren’t your typical married couple, and despite being married for almost a decade, their marriage is anything but traditional. Mikki and Raheem have what she calls an "asexual polyamorous marriage."
Defining Her Sexuality
It wasn't until last summer that Mikki found the language to define her sexuality. "I didn't have the language for it until last summer," she explained to xoNecole. "Looking back, I just thought sex wasn't my thing. It was never enjoyable for me, and I'd go years without even noticing.”
Mikki always thought she was broken because she had no interest in sex. Mikki noticed after her friends came to visit and started discussing their sexual fantasies that she realized something was different about her. “At that point, I knew something was definitely different about me since I do not have sexual fantasies at all. It was truly news to me that people are at work thinking about sex! That was not my experience.” This led to Mikki researching asexuality, which she soon realized fit her to a T. “It felt like breathing new air when I was able to call it by name," said Mikki.
"Looking back, I just thought sex wasn't my thing. It was never enjoyable for me, and I'd go years without even noticing it."
Asexuality refers to people who experience little or no sexual attraction, experience attraction without acting on it sexually, or experience sexual attraction differently based on other factors. Like most things, asexuality falls on a spectrum and encompasses many other identities. It's important to remember, however, that attraction and action are not always synonymous: some asexuals may reject the idea of sexual contact, but others may be sex-neutral and engage in sexual activity.
It's possible that some asexuals will have sex with someone else despite not having a libido or masturbating, but others will have sex with a partner because it brings a sense of connection.
From a Traditional Marriage to Kitchen Table Polyamory
Although Mikki never really had a high sex drive, it wasn’t until after the birth of her son, that she noticed her sex drive took a real nosedive. “I never had a high sex drive, but about a year after my son was born, I realized I had zero desire. My husband has a high sex drive, and I knew that it would not be sustainable to not have sex in our marriage at that time.”
She was determined to find an alternative to divorce and stumbled upon a polyamory conversation on Clubhouse. Upon doing her own research, she brought up the idea to their husband, who was receptive. “It’s so interesting to me that people weigh sex so heavily in relationships when even if you are having a ton of sex, it’s still a very small percentage of the relationship activity," Mikki shared.
They chose polyamory because Mikki still wanted to be married, but she also wanted to make sure that Raheem was getting his individual needs and desires met, even if that meant meeting them with someone else. “I think that we have been programmed to think that our spouses need to be our 'everything.' We do not operate like that. There is no one way that fits all when it comes to relationships, despite what society may try to tell you. Their path to doing this thing called life together may be different from yours, but they found what works for them. We have chosen to design a marriage that works for us,” Mikki explained.
"We have chosen to design a marriage that works for us. We both consent to each of us having everything from casual sex partners to lifetime partners if it should go there. We believe love is abundant and do not limit ourselves or each other on how we express it."
She continued, “We both consent to each of us having everything from casual sexual partners to lifetime partners if it should get there. We believe love is abundant and do not limit ourselves or each other on how we express it. Our dynamic is parallel with kitchen table poly aspirations.”
Kitchen table polyamory (KTP) is a polyamorous relationship in which all participants are on friendly terms enough to share a meal at the kitchen table. Basically, it means you have some form of relationship with your partner’s other partner, whether as a group or individually. A lot of times, KTP relationships are highly personal and rooted in mutual respect, communication, and friendship.
Intimacy in an Asexual Polyamorous Marriage
Mikki says she and her husband, Raheem, still share intimate moments despite being in a polyamorous marriage. “Our intimacy is emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and physical, although non-sexual. We are intentional about date nights weekly, surprising and delighting each other daily, and most of all, we communicate our needs regularly. In my opinion, our intimacy is top-tier! I give my husband full-body massages, mani-pedis and make sure I am giving him small physical touches/kisses throughout the day. He is also very intentional about showing me his love and affection.”
Raheem and Mikki now use their lives as examples for others. On their website, thepolycouplenextdoor.com, they coach people interested in learning how to be consensually non-monogamous. “We are both relationship coaches. I specialized in emotional regulation, and Raheem specializes in communication and conflict resolution. The same tools we use in our marriage help our clients succeed in polyamory."
Mikki advises people who may be asexual or seeking non-monogamy to communicate their needs openly and to consider seeking sex therapy or intimacy coaching. Building a strong relationship with a non-sexual partner requires both empathy and compassion.
For more of Mikki, follow her on Instagram @getmikkibey. Follow the couple's platform on Instagram @thepolycouplenextdoor.
Featured image by skynesher/Getty Images
