If you come to check out our site on a semi-consistent basis, you might've caught an article I wrote, back when the weather was much warmer. It was entitled, "8 Summer-Themed Alcoholic Drinks That Can Boost Your Libido". Well, now that it's getting colder by the day, and also since the fall and winter seasons are apparently the best times to engage in some hot 'n steamy copulation (check out "Did You Know Fall & Winter Are The Best Times To Have Sex?"), it seemed only right that I share some warm drinks that can take your sex drive up a couple of notches too.
So, if you're ready to come in from the freezing weather, so that you can step into a warm room in order to participate in some of the best sex you've had yet, here are eight drinks that can get you to feeling like this truly is the most wonderful time of the year (if you catch my drift).
1. Cinnamon and Coconut Milk
If you're constantly on the hunt for milk alternatives, don't forget to put coconut milk on your list.
Not only is it loaded with antioxidants, it also has a good amount of protein, calcium and potassium in it as well. This is good to know because potassium plays a direct role in increasing male hormone production while regulating our thyroid. Cinnamon is awesome because it's got medicinal properties in it that can help to fight off bacterial and fungal infections. Not only that but, sex-wise, cinnamon is able to increase blood circulation, improve blood vessel dilation (both of those can intensify your orgasms) and increase one's sex drive.
Just add three teaspoons of freshly ground cinnamon to three cups of coconut milk, bring to a boil and then let cool down enough for you and your partner to sip. Feel free to add a little honey if you'd like your drink to taste, just a bit sweeter. This drink will help you to have great sex and some good sleep right after.
2. Blueberry Tea
If you like to snack on blueberries and there's rarely a time when you're not in the mood for sex, it may not be happenstance. The reality is blueberries are high in Vitamin B (which can give you more energy, stabilize your moods and make you more interested in coitus), Vitamin C (which is an antioxidant) and fiber to keep toxins out of your system. Also, when it comes to your libido, blueberries are awesome because they help your body to release the neurotransmitter dopamine, so that you're able to feel great while your partner is able to have longer and stronger erections during, well, you know. #wink
3. Warmed Up Kiwi Sangria
Sangria is a festive drink that hails from Spain and Portugal. While there are all kinds of variations of it, the "foundation" is almost always red wine, chopped fruit and spices of your choosing. Well, a particular fruit that's in season during this time of the year is kiwi. Kiwi contains vitamins C, E and K, as well as folate, potassium and fiber. Because Vitamin C has a great reputation for boosting one's libido and fertility, that's why I found it fitting that hot kiwi sangria would also go on this list. Click here to make your own white kiwi sangria, here to make some delicious strawberry kiwi sangria or here for a spicy sangria recipe. If you bring the ingredients in these recipes to a boil, let them simmer on warm heat and then serve them in a mug with some kiwi and/or orange garnish, you'll enjoy this drink, right down to the very last drop.
4. Hot Cocoa
I don't know a single soul who doesn't dig a cup of hot chocolate (if you're one of 'em, post a comment about why because…what in the world?). As if the taste of chocolate isn't a good enough reason to have some, at least a couple of times a week, during the fall and winter seasons, dark chocolate is pretty impressive when it comes to its health benefits too.
It's also packed with antioxidants as well as magnesium, iron, manganese, copper, potassium, zinc, phosphorus, fiber and selenium. Magnesium makes it easier for testosterone to hit our bloodstream. Zinc is good, when it comes to your sex drive, because it helps men to maintain their libido and, it can actually increase our testosterone levels which can, in turn, make us hornier too. Also, dark chocolate helps us to produce more serotonin (a brain chemical that's connected to sexual arousal) and phenylethylamine (a natural stimulant that actually causes people to feel like they're in love with each other).
All extra bonuses to having some hot cocoa tonight, don't you think?
(A recipe that intrigued me is one that contains vegan "sex dust". Check out the recipe here. Cop some of the all-natural sex dust to put in your cocoa here.)
5. Pumpkin Latte
Pumpkin contains quite a few goodies—protein, fiber, vitamins B2, C and E, potassium, copper and iron too. Where pumpkin is really off the charts is when it comes to Vitamin A; it's got around 245 percent of the Reference Daily Intake that your body needs. That's important to know because Vitamin A is what male and female sex hormones both need in order to remain healthy and strong. Another great thing about pumpkin is it's full of zinc. So, if you want to entice your partner with some homemade pumpkin spice latte, there's an easy to make recipe here.
6. Warm Canelazo
Whenever I pen a food or drink article, I try and throw in something that makes you say "what is that?", just to bring something new into the content. Today, it's a traditionally spicy hot drink from Ecuador called Canelazo. While the name might sound super exotic, this is a drink that's really easy to make. All you need is some sugar (preferably panela which is a form of organic raw cane sugar), some cinnamon sticks, some Aguardiente (which is anise-flavored liqueur) and some water. We already touched on what cinnamon does and if you add liquor to that? How can Canelazo not be a sex party in a mug? (Click here for an alcoholic and non-alcoholic recipe. To warm it up, apply the same tips that I offered in the sangria recipe).
7. Mulled Wine
If you've heard of mulled wine before but you're not exactly sure what it is, it's red wine that has spices in it. This alcoholic drink makes this particular list because you're able to serve it warm or cold (it really is very good when it's hot, by the way).
Red wine is a fan favorite on this platform because it contains antioxidants that are able to lower cholesterol levels, strengthen the heart, regulate blood sugar levels, reduce depression-related symptoms—all of which play a significant role in keeping our libidos intact. Plus, it's proven to be able to significantly increase our sex drive after just one glass.
All you need is some red wine, cinnamon and a few cloves (they are nerve stimulants that can also give you more energy) and you're all set (check out a great recipe for mulled wine here).
8. Coffee
I'm not sure if there will ever be a less controversial hot drink than coffee. The reason why I say that is because it comes with about as many risks as benefits. Today, let's just focus on the benefits, though. Reportedly, coffee is able to burn fat, increase energy levels, improve physical performance, fight depression-related symptoms and even reduce death risks by almost 30 percent (in women; 20 percent in men). As far as sex goes, there are solid studies citing that the caffeine in coffee not only provides us with stamina to have sex but it can make females specifically crave more coitus too. So, if java on a snowy day is your thing, make sure to make an extra cup tonight. Umm, you already know why, right? Exactly.
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Why can’t (more) singles just be single and be okay with that? Good Lord. Why does there need to be some sort of relational play-on-words to make it sound like we’re with someone — even if we’re not?
Now masturdating? Even though it’s not even close to being a “real” word, it’s something that also brought a laugh outta me — although it was then followed by a genuine smile. The laugh because I almost immediately caught the play-on-words. The smile was due to the intention behind it all.
If you’re not familiar with what masturdating is and you’re curious about why you should even care, take a few moments to at least skim through what it’s about and why I think participating, as a single person, is a pretty cool (and effective) concept.
@knotlukas Masturdate: a date w oneself
What’s Masturdating All About?
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Masturdating. Okay, so let the word marinate for just a moment. What does it sound like? Yeah…exactly. And since a huge part of masturbation centers around self-pleasure, it’s cool to explore how “self-dating” could produce similar (as far as pleasure is concerned in a broader sense) results. Because masturdating is all about spending quality time with yourself, pampering yourself, treating yourself— and yes, taking yourself out on dates.
Any of you who may think that masturdating is a consolation prize — and a pitiful one at that — for not being able to go out with another human being or get that dream $200 first date that social media was all in a tizzy about last year (bookmark that) — personally, I think that you’re the demographic who needs to try out masturdating first and the most. Why? Off top, I’ll share my three good reasons.
3 Reasons To Strongly Consider Masturdating
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1. It’s an intimate way to get to know yourself better. I’ve been working with couples for a pretty long time at this point and if there’s a pattern that I see arise, OFTEN, it’s that two people are oftentimes so busy trying to “find their person” that they didn’t even know who they were. As a direct result, they found themselves in a relationship with someone who only complemented the “kiddie pool version” of who they were.
That’s why it can be so beneficial to spend time getting to know yourself on the “deep end” of things: what makes you tick, what your passions are, what you want most out of life, what are your interests beyond obvious things — and masturdating can help you to discover all of this. Whether it’s traveling alone or taking out a weekend to drink some wine and journal, the more you get to know yourself, the clearer you’ll be about who complements you on a romantic and friendship level.
2. It will definitely help to boost your confidence levels. I guess since I’m an ambivert, I don’t really get why people freak out at the mere thought of going to a restaurant or movie alone. Personally, I think it requires a helluva lot more energy and gumption to wait around and plan stuff with other people (#Elmoshrug). However, whether you’re an introvert, extrovert, or ambivert, there’s no way around the fact that the more comfortable you get with doing things alone, the more your confidence levels will increase — no, soar — because of it.
One article that I read on the topic said that doing things alone can make you more creative, improve your mental health, and help you to be totally okay with being alone (so that you’re not “needy” for other people’s attention). A psychotherapist from a New York Times article on the benefits of spending time alone said, “Getting better at identifying moments when we need solitude to recharge and reflect can help us better handle negative emotions and experiences, like stress and burnout.” And when you’re able to stare negativity in its face without flinching, how could that not make you bolder, more self-secure, and hopeful about your life?
3. It will teach you to value your time more effectively. In every facet of your world, you’re gonna operate from a healthier place if you’re operating from a “full cup” rather than an empty one. When it comes to this topic, think about it — if you’re constantly waiting on someone to call you to go out or wishing for a dream date with some guy, all you’re doing is wasting precious time that you could be spending taking a cooking class or hell, hiring a chef to make you dinner at your own home.
Indeed, waiting has two sides to it: when it’s in the form of patience, it is indeed a virtue, yet when it’s wrapped up in the notion that you’re not really living life unless you have an audience…it is totally working against you. Choose wisely.
10 Solo Date Ideas To Help You To “Master” Masturdating
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So, what if you’re someone who has either never considered actually masturdating before or you don’t really know what to do beyond dinner and the movies? Here are a few ideas to consider:
1. Attend a workshop or masterclass that you’re interested in. If there’s something that you’ve always wanted to learn, sign up for a workshop or masterclass. The cool thing about this option is there are probably some in your city, as well as some that you can find online (like here) that are convenient and affordable.
2. Binge-read at a local coffee shop. Aside from their coziness and oftentimes inviting scents, I once read that a lot of us gravitate to coffee shops because we can be around people without having to actually socialize with them. So, if you want to “hang out” while still being able to enjoy a bit of solitude, take a book that you’ve been trying to finish to a local coffee shop, order your favorite latte, and sit in a big-ass comfy chair. Usually, you can sit there for hours, and the staff will be just fine with it (another bonus).
3. Have a spa day in the next town. You can never go wrong with a spa day. And while going with a friend can be fun, sometimes there’s too much talking transpiring to be able to fully chill out and relax. So, go off of the grid, get a change of scenery, and hit up a spa in the next city (or town). There are lots of studies out here supporting that day trips or “daycations” can actually be really good for your long-term health and well-being.
4. See a community play. Some of the best solo dates that I’ve ever been on consisted of taking in some of the local arts in my city. What’s really cool about this particular option is, oftentimes, they are extremely inexpensive, if not totally free of charge (in exchange for making a donation or putting money into a tip jar).
5. Plan a trip. Whenever people say something along the lines of, “If you don’t expect anything, you won’t be disappointed,” I know that they low-key have some (additional) healing to do from past disappointments. There’s simply too much intel out here to support that anticipation (of good stuff) makes us more motivated and optimistic, keeps our dopamine levels up, and makes life more exciting overall.
Since traveling alone is more cost-effective, gives you the freedom to do whatever you want (when you want), and increases the possibility of meeting new people and having new experiences on your journey — why not devote a day this weekend to planning a solo trip? All the way around, it’s good for you.
6. Try your hand at your own “$200 date.” Uh-huh. Roll your eyes if you want to, but it’s real easy to talk left about how a man should be able to just drop $200 like it’s nothing…until you actually try to do it. So yes, while taking yourself out on this type of date could serve as a bit of a reality check, it can also “scratch the itch” of waiting on some dude to do it for you. It’s also way less emotionally draining because, at least when you’re taking your own self out, it’s guaranteed that you’ll enjoy the company…right?
7. DIY some pampering. When you get a chance, check out “5 Reasons You Should Unapologetically Pamper Yourself,” “Want To Love On Yourself? Try These 10 Things At Home.,” “I’ve Got Some Ways For You To Start Pampering Your Soul,” and “When's The Last Time You Actually Pampered Your Vagina?” The bottom line here is pampering is all about, not mere self-maintenance; it’s all about treating yourself to levels of EXTREME SELF-INDULGENCE. So, if nothing else tickles your fancy on this list, at least consider doing that, chile.
8. Feed your creativity. Something that I used to be really good at is art. That said, one of my goddaughters is insanely talented, so she has reminded me to tap back into it. Also, a big part of what got me into the writing world is poetry; I actually used to be a house poet at a local spot. Sometimes, my best quality time moments with myself have been revisiting these creative sides of me — and this is definitely easier to do (and enjoy) alone.
9. Try some stargazing. When’s the last time you took a blanket into your backyard, laid down on it, and just stared at the stars for hours on end? While some say that stargazing can teach you to be mindful, others say that being in that form of nature reduces stress, while others believe that looking up at the universe at night can increase your attention span. All solid reasons to give it a shot, if you ask me.
10. DO. ABSOLUTELY. NOTHING. Let me tell you something that nobody will ever be able to make me feel bad about: doing absolutely nothing. I’ve got data to back me up. Good Housekeeping shares that doing nothing can help you decide how you want to respond or react to certain things. I like howThe Guardian says that taking this approach helps you to regain control of what you give your attention to.
TIME magazine says that it can ultimately make you more productive.BBC offers up that it can help you tap into your ingenuity.Henry Ford Health says that it can make you kinder and a better problem-solver. So, if you want to invest in yourself, do nothing sometimes.
Closing Thoughts from the Lovely Javicia Leslie
While some of y'all may know Javicia Leslie from being the former Batwoman, I discovered her back in the day from the indie series Chef Julian (and yes, "Julian" was right to say that "Mo" looks like Tatyana Ali...the real ones know). Sometimes I'll hop on her IG to see what she's got going on and this story popped up within a few hours of me penning this...so, I took it as hella confirmation.
TREAT YO SELF. WAIT FOR NO ONE.
WAIT FOR NO ONE. TREAT YO SELF.
RINSE AND REPEAT.
_____
Sooo…what kind of masturdating plans do you have for this coming weekend? While going out with others has its perks, hanging out with yourself has a ton of ‘em too. Enjoy!
No…for real. ENJOY!
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