Consider These Key Things Before Quitting Your Job For Self-Employment

Self-employment is something many people prefer or aspire to, as being your own boss is both admirable and empowering. And women are bossing up more than ever, representing almost 40% of all self-employed professionals. Being self-employed myself, I can attest to the benefits, but like everything in life, there are two dueling sides to every coin. And if you're considering taking the leap from 9-to-5er to self-employed, there's a lot to consider before totally pulling the plug on your day job.
Here are a few things to know, from my own experience, before transitioning into self-employment:
1. Recognize that self-employment is not entrepreneurship.
There are key differences between being an entrepreneur and being self-employed that many people get all mixed up and confused about. The terms are often used interchangeably, but they are definitely not the same.
A self-employed person operates just like an employee, often offering services and talents to business owners, nonprofits, or organizations. An entrepreneur typically offers goods and services to a client or customer, registers their business for tax purposes, and can reap the benefits of resources like business bank accounts, financing, and investments.
When you're self-employed, you often don't get paid if you don't work, most typically as a freelancer or on a project-by-project or client-by-client basis. When you're an entrepreneur, you can successfully scale a business where you can reap the benefits whether you're actively working in it or not.
You can indeed launch a one-person business (i.e., as a limited liability company or LLC), but there are requirements related to that, particularly when it comes to taxes. There are also things to consider, such as lifestyle, goals, and risk tolerance. The annual and financial obligations entrepreneurs have aren't the same as self-employed professionals, like additional taxes, filing fees, and mandatory financial reports.

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(I know some of y'all entrepreneurs might be reading this with a side-eye, but hey, not every self-employed person is a business person, and some simply might not want the extra maintenance and responsibilities of having a registered business, no matter the perks.)
While I'm not discouraging any self-employed person from launching a business, knowing the difference between the two is important because it sets the tone for how you approach the work that you do, your expectations on the lifestyle and requirements, and what benefits might be afforded to you.
Many entrepreneurs can employ people, scale their businesses for expansion, get capital investment, and even take days, weeks, or months off without having to actually work yet still reap the benefits. This is often not the case for a self-employed person whose salary largely depends on actual work hours, paid invoices, and strategic budgeting.
2. Inform yourself about the tax obligations and other financial shifts that might happen once you are self-employed.
When you're working a 9-to-5, your company handles taking taxes out of each check. This is not the case for self-employed folk. There's a quarterly schedule that must be followed for federal taxes, and there are other regulations based on the state where you primarily work (even if you're working remote). If you're used to having a hands-off approach to taxes (other than going to the tax preparer once a year), you definitely want to shift your expectations and get to know all the information you can about self-employment taxes.
Also, the way you budget might be a bit different when you're self-employed. If you find, for example, that you're constantly living check to check or that you're used to a guaranteed paycheck every two weeks, you'll need to shift the way you look at how money flows in your household.
Self-employment can include periods where you're not getting paid as consistently, and many companies work with invoices that are paid 30, 60, or even 90 days after you've finished the work you've done for them. Keep this in mind and plan accordingly based on the industry you'll be working within.
Talk to a tax or personal finance professional to find out about how your finances and tax obligation might change once you decide to become self-employed, and then set up a plan so that you won't get caught slipping come Tax Day. The process is different for self-employed people, and this is an important aspect of the process that will save you lots of money and stress in the long run.
I learned the hard way to negotiate, upfront, a set period of time for my services (when applicable and reasonable) to be written into a contract and to set my rates not solely based on my previous salary but considering additional costs like WIFI, travel, health insurance that I have to pay for out-of-pocket, home office technology and tools, and the time it actually takes to complete tasks. The pandemic brought home how super-important this was because, as a freelancer, someone can simply cut you with no compensation or warning.
3. Get to know your true strengths and weaknesses when it comes to work ethic, skills, environment, and motivation.
Self-employment is definitely not for the faint at heart. It can be a constant hustle in the beginning, and if you're not careful, you might end up wondering how you'll pay your rent or car note simply because you don't have clients or work lined up. It's good to be a self-starter and super-organized. It's also good to brush up on your marketing, communications, and sales skills because you'll need to pitch yourself and your background in order to land projects and clients.
While working your full-time job, take a few courses or find a self-employed mentor so that you can strengthen your skills in areas where you might need some improvement (i.e., pitching, online marketing, social media branding, or project management.) Practice self-employment on the side as an intern or with a side hustle so you can learn a bit more about yourself that you might be overlooking while serving as an employee.
Being self-employed means you become multiple departments in one person. For example, your current company provides support like assistants, accounting departments, legal teams, and IT, so you might not be used to having to handle all of those things on your own. For some, this can be overwhelming, while others find the challenge invigorating and worth the sacrifice if it means having autonomy and financial and time freedom.
Also, if you're motivated to do your best by being around teams or working in an office, self-employment might be too isolating for you. True, there are groups and co-working cultures you can join, but it's definitely not the same as having built-in comradery of fellow full-timers at a company. Be aware of these things so that you're realistically making a choice that suits the life you want to live and the work experience you want to have in order to thrive.

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4. Create an emergency fund solely for the transition.
While you're working a 9-to-5, create a separate savings account just for the transition. Anything can happen between quitting your job and getting your first freelance gig, client, or project. When I first stepped out to be self-employed, I thought I had the dream client, only to find out that it wasn't a good fit and I'd be looking for a new one after six months. This might happen several times before you really hit a groove, find your fit, build up your reputation, and get consistent work.
Having a financial cushion outside of your usual emergency fund helps to soften the blow if something like a client loss, a late invoice payment, or an unexpected work-related expense (i.e., computer replacement or broken equipment repair) comes up.
Sometimes, self-employment can include certain up-front costs like renting an office space, investing in new technology or other tools, travel expenses, or hiring other self-employed professionals (i.e., a consultant, web designer, or tax preparer), so you'll want to be smart, be prepared, and keep your receipts.
5. Understand your why.
Every great and sustainable journey starts with a good reason---a "why" that keeps a person going. If you know your why, you're less likely to just give up when things get rough, and you're less likely to make costly, mentally and physically draining mistakes. I decided to go for full-time self-employment because, after more than a decade working in my field, I really felt burned out at the time, began to resent not being promoted as quickly as I thought I should, and saw that I could make more money contracting my skills and talents out than working full-time for one company.
I also loved that I could pick and choose who I worked with and align my values with the projects that I was part of (versus being forced due to being a full-time employee beholden to a contract and the so-called values of a corporation or company.)
I've made quite a few mistakes over the years, but my why remains the same, and when times get hard, I simply remember the overall peace, flexibility, and autonomy I have in serving the women millennial audiences I want to serve through journalism and communications.
6. Be sure that you're offering services or expertise that can be used for years to come and that's competitive.
If you're considering self-employment, be sure your skills are competitive and have a future of need. I knew, even a decade ago, that much of the media industry was going the freelance route, and today, with layoffs becoming commonplace and full-time employee budgets being cut, contract work has become the name of the game. I saw this industry shift coming a mile away, and, like my early foray into digital media before publishing houses were monetizing it, I knew eventually, freelance work would be abundant and preferred.
If you're already doing a job that is in high demand or you offer something niche and one-of-a-kind, working for yourself might be the move. But if you've found that your current skills might be obsolete in the next two to five years, try learning another skill, shifting how you do the work you do, or tapping into another passion that can ensure you're offering something valuable in a market where it's direly needed.
Self-employment can be a joy and a pain, and for many of us, it's the only choice for self-care, mental wellness, and financial freedom. If you're considering taking the leap, take into account these tips and go forward in bold confidence, informed, and prepared.
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Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns
Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.
It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.
Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.
At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.

In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.

In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.

And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.

We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.

So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.

That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.

This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
Give Thanks: 10 Tips For Hosting An Absolutely Awesome Friendsgiving
If you’ve never checked out an episode of the ReLiving Single Podcast featuring Maxine and Synclaire — oops, I mean Erika Alexander and Kim Coles — it’s worth listening to an episode or two; especially if you’re someone like me who watches the Living Single reruns on TV One, sometimes, like they just came out. Good times.
And what does this even remotely have to do with Friendsgiving? Well, if you ever wondered what the origin story of this non-holiday-holiday is, legend has it that it’s mostly due to the combination of a 2007 tweet and the show that tries to act like it wasn’t birthed out of Living Single: Friends (I’m not the only one who feels this way either; you can read more about all of that here, here and here).
Apparently, there was a Thanksgiving episode that featured all of the friends having dinner together. And y’all, there was simply no way that I was going to mention the latter without shouting out the original (amen?).
Okay, so with that out of the way — Friendsgiving. Something that I appreciate about twists to holidays like this is that it’s a reminder that there is no one way to celebrate special occasions. And so, if, for whatever the reason, you will not or cannot be with family during the holiday season, there are certainly other alternatives at your disposal.
That being said, if the thought of spending time with friends this Thanksgiving is something that you’d like to do, yet you’re not sure how to host it in a way that will make Friendsgiving a fan favorite for your entire circle — I’ve got 10 suggestions that can make the planning process easy as pumpkin (or sweet potato) pie.
1. Position Chrysanthemums or Orchids for Your Table Décor

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Let’s start with décor first. Listen, aside from cleaning up your place, you don’t have to be over the top. If you put together a really nice centerpiece or put a flower at each table setting, honestly, you’re all good. And if you’re someone who is big on details and symbolism, my recommendation would be to go with some chrysanthemums and/or orchids.
When it comes to chrysanthemums, not only are they a peak fall flower, they represent things like friendship and happiness. And orchids? They tend to bloom during the fall and spring seasons and, not only are they about luxury, certain orchid colors also symbolize friendship (for the record, yellow roses symbolize friendship too). Perfect.
2. Incorporate Scents That Cultivate Gratitude
Speaking of cultivating a warm and inviting space, you can never go wrong with scented soy candles — or at least having an essential oil diffuser in a few spots. Some scents that actually help to bring in the spirit of gratitude include vanilla, jasmine, ginger, cedarwood and frankincense.
3. Use Upscale Paper Products to Dine With

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Let’s be real — a lot more of us would probably host events in our home if it wasn’t for the mess that is left behind in our kitchen once the festivities are over. Wanna avoid that? Use paper plates. No, I don’t mean the cheap Styrofoam ones. SMDH. These days, there are paper (and plastic) plate brands that will low-key blow your mind when it comes to how bougie they look. Some that are worth considering are located here, here and here.
4. Handwrite Thank-You Notes (Use Them As Place Settings)
If you’re like Tiffany (from the HBO series Insecure — what a time) was at that memorable dinner party when all hell broke loose between Lawrence and Issa and you’re pretty anal — I mean, particular — LOL — about place settings, it’s a nice touch to pick up some blank thank-you cards that you can write a personalized “I’m thankful for you because…” message in. Place each one where you’d like each friend to sit. They won’t see it coming and it’s a really nice touch.
5. Have Everyone Bring Their Favorite Homemade Dish

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Okay, and what if what has you on the fence about hosting is you don’t feel like doing a ton of cooking? Chile, this is where the concept of having a potluck comes in. Get everyone to bring the dish that they claim they cook the best and make sure to let them know how many individuals you plan on coming (so that they will make enough). You can even make a game out of it by having everyone anonymously vote for the first, second and third best dishes out of the bunch. Take it up a notch by having a prize for each winner.
6. Take a Warm Drink and Dessert Poll Beforehand
You know what isn’t discussed enough about dinner parties? Folks bringing desserts that other people don’t even like. SMDH. You can avoid this from becoming an issue at your Friendsgiving by sending an email (most people prefer that to group chats; let’s be real — and make sure to BCC everyone as well) asking everyone to share what their top three favorite desserts and warm drinks are. Then pick the top 2-3 out of the bunch. That way, you won’t have a ton of (for instance) coffee cake or apple cider lying around that no one even wanted in the first place.
7. Create a Signature Friendsgiving Mocktail and Cocktail

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Speaking of drinks, another way to make your Friendsgiving memorable is to come up with a signature mocktail (for those who don’t consume alcohol) and cocktail. For the mocktail, you can also poll your friends about their favorite mocktail or fruits and come up with a mixture of your own. For the cocktail — although National Friendship Day is actually in August, I did peep that there are certain drinks that have been created in its honor. Some of them are located here for you to do a bit of tweaking on (if you’d like).
8. Ask Everyone to Share Their “Favorite Friend Quality” of Another
You know how it’s customary for everyone to go around and share what they are truly thankful for before having dinner? Well, to continue along with the Friendsgiving theme, have each person share what their favorite friend quality is about the person to their right. If folks are just meeting each other for the first time, instead they can share what they value the most in friendship overall, along with a story of how it was displayed to them personally over the past 12 months.
9. Send Each of Your Guests Home with a Fresh Gratitude Journal

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Wanna send folks home with a nice parting gift? It would be so on-trend to give each of them a gratitude journal. Listen, we are in some crazy times right through here (at least in the States) and so, encouraging your friends to set some time aside, regularly, to think about and then outwardly express what they are grateful for? That helps to keep stress down, keep things in perspective and it reminds us all to maintain a positive mindset as much as possible.
10. Watch a Nostalgic Movie
While everyone is enjoying dessert and drinks, how about watching a movie that brings back fond memories? A list of some of the most popular movies to come out previous Thanksgiving weekends is located here and a list of some favorite Black holiday-themed films can be found here. It’s a way to wind down and share some laughs before everyone heads home.
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Friendsgiving. What a wonderful way to celebrate your friends while also observing Thanksgiving in a way that is totally on your terms. And now that you know how to put it together, what are you waiting for? Hit your friends up and let them know that, whether it’s on actual Thanksgiving Day or a few days before or after, you’ve got a special dinner in mind.
One that has a good time with amazing friends written ALL over it.
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