The other day, I was scrolling through my YouTube homepage, and I came across a video by YouTuber Bria Jones titled “your fear of BEING SEEN is holding you back from your fullest potential…let’s change that.” In the almost 19-minute video, she discussed the many reasons why people may have a fear of being seen and how it can negatively impact their lives. By avoiding being seen, you are masking your true self from others and letting others control your life. One of the solutions Bria suggested was tapping into your inner child because children are usually happy, free, and authentically themselves before the world tries to change them.
One of the reasons why I clicked on the video is because I, too, struggle with being seen. Since last year, I’ve been on a spiritual journey, which has helped me build up my confidence and uncover things about myself, the good and the not-so-good. When I was a child, I was always the center of attention.
You could find me somewhere smiling, talking, showing off my cuteness. But I quickly realized that not only brought a lot of positive attention, it brought a lot of negative attention as well. And as I got older, I became more concerned about what others thought of me and being careful not to step on anybody’s toes. I had become the complete opposite of who I truly was on the inside. It was painful, but I felt paralyzed and couldn’t do anything about it.
There would be moments when I could feel my authentic self trying to break free, but my body wouldn’t move. I’d become scared of being seen. Looking at me, you may not think this was something I deal with or have ever dealt with. I’ve always been fashion-forward, hair done, nails done, smiling, laughing, and I be outside (sometimes). However, there were so many experiences I had that, because of this fear, I was in my head and couldn’t allow myself to enjoy the moment even when the attention was already on me. I would deflect or try to avoid the attention altogether.
But while being on this spiritual journey has helped me a lot to get back to the true essence of London, I still have my moments where I struggle. Being a content creator comes to mind. It’s something about posting certain content on social media that sometimes holds me back from posting. I’m definitely not one of those people who likes to put EVERYTHING on social media, but I do want to create authentic content that connects with others and builds a community with my followers.
That’s why this video couldn’t come at a better time. The tips that Bria provided, such as tapping into your inner child and accepting that not everyone isn’t going to like you, but your content will connect with the right people, is the reminder I needed to always be myself. And for those who are judging you, send them love (in your head). Because, at the end of the day, I refuse to let anyone have that much power over me.
your fear of BEING SEEN is holding you back from your fullest potential...let's change thatwww.youtube.com
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Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube