September is bringing things full circle. This year has had a lot of ups and downs. There have been some major wins in the start, but there have also been a lot of moments of growth, some more uncomfortable than others. With September beginning in Virgo Season, with Mercury retrograde in Virgo, and Venus retrograde in September, there is a balance needed to be had with what is falling away and what is coming in.
The insights are powerful in Virgo Season, and there is also an underlying energy of pressure to get it together. Remember this time is not about overworking or overthinking and that the energy of the month is more about bringing things together and coming to positive conclusions.
September 2023 Horoscopes: An Overview
Venus officially goes direct in Leo on September 3rd and will remain direct in this fire sign until October 8th. Venus in Leo is inspiring, creative, and bold. Take what you have learned in love, especially about yourself in love, and use this energy to create more abundance and happiness in your life.
Jupiter goes retrograde in Taurus the following day, facilitating a different set of areas of growth and influencing finances as well as love. Jupiter will be in retrograde until December 30th, so the rest of this year is really about planning thoroughly financially while also setting your intentions and believing in miracles for yourself here.
On September 14th, there is a New Moon in Virgo, and this New Moon is bringing a fresh perspective. This is a time of harvest, and many will be seeing the manifestations they have been working on since springtime, bloom for them now. This Virgo Moon is here to create divine order and stabilize blessings.
With Mercury moving out of retrograde and going direct in Virgo the following day, the Virgo energy this month is creating impactful change, a new beginning, and much-needed closures of what wasn’t working. This is a month of turning a new leaf and standing in your power.
Finally, before the month ends, the Sun moves into air sign Libra, and Libra Season officially begins. Libra Season is different from Virgo Season as in Virgo Season, we are inspired to work, get it together, and take care of everything we have been putting off. In Libra Season, we are inspired to love, tend to our relationships, and create beauty and art in the world that Virgo Season helped us build and manifest.
On the last day of the month, there is a Supermoon in Aries, and just when you thought the energy was settling, some big changes and closures occur.
Keep reading to learn what September has in store for your zodiac sign.
September 2023 Monthly Horoscopes for Each Zodiac Sign
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleARIES
In September, you are being reawakened, Aries. This is an eye-opening month for you and a time when a big impact is being made in your life. You are seeing things in a new light, and you are spiritually evolving. Jupiter goes retrograde at the start of the month and highlights your financial zone. This month is the starting point of a four-month-long journey of defining your values, your integrity, and planning for the future.
Toward the end of September, the Sun moves into your 7th house of love, and you get some more time to spend on your relationships, your pleasure, and your heart. You are getting redirected this month and putting yourself on the path that is going to serve you and your goals the most. Before the month ends, there is a Supermoon in your sign, and you are truly breaking free and stepping into your power.
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleTAURUS
September is a much-needed reality check, Taurus. You are getting the answers you are looking for, but it’s taking some time to adjust to new perspectives. What you thought was put in the past is being brought to your attention again, and thankfully, you are ready to put down the defenses and come to some important conclusions. Venus moving out of retrograde and going direct on September 3rd will be helping you facilitate that new beginning, especially in the home.
The most important transit happening for you this month is Jupiter in Taurus going retrograde from September 4th until December 30th. For the rest of this year, you will be unpacking, processing, and getting to know yourself better. Jupiter wants to open your eyes to more of who you are, and this time is all about showing up, using your voice, and honoring your multi-faceted, growing self. Surrender to the unknown, knowing the universe is supporting you every step of the way.
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleGEMINI
A chapter is closing in your life this month, and you are ready for a change, Gemini. This transformation you are moving through in September couldn’t have come at a better time because you are tired of the emotional stagnation you have been feeling. Jupiter goes retrograde in your house of endings, healing, and closure this month for the rest of this year, and this is helping you heal. You are making sense of the patterns and stories that have been playing out in your life and are moving on.
Your ruling planet has been retrograde since late August and goes direct on the 15th of this month. With this breath of fresh air coming into your life in mid-September and a Supermoon in your 11th house of community and friendship the week following, you will have moments of freedom, connection, and acceptance that are profound. Even though you are moving through some changes that are, at times, uncomfortable, you can clearly see the good you are creating in your life as well this month.
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCANCER
September is a month of happiness for you, Cancer. The Sun is shining, and you are elated with its beams shining on you. This is an inspiring month and a time when you are seeing the happy outcomes you have been wishing for. You deserve to feel good, to feel healthy, and to be in your power, and this month is reminding you of that. The New Moon, happening on September 14th, is a new beginning for you in regards to open communication, and you are liking what you are hearing this month.
Moving further into September, the energy shifts as the Full Moon occurs in your 4th house of home and family and helps you open your eyes to where you can gain more stability in life and where you can put more of your efforts. The key this month is to not let anyone steal your joy or your shine but to also give a helping hand and to use your newfound inspiration to help better the lives of others as well. Your life is expanding, and it’s beautiful.
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleLEO
Your dreams are coming true, and it’s time to act as if it’s already so. Your belief systems are key this month, and your guidance is to focus on what you want and to believe and know that it’s yours. You have come so far and are reaching some important achievements and milestones this month, Leo. The month begins with Venus in Leo finally moving out of retrograde and allowing you more room to breathe in self-love rather than the self-criticism that has been more prevalent as of late.
Mercury is retrograde in your 2nd house of income and finances until September 15th, and once Mercury goes direct, you are seeing yourself in a better position financially than when you started this retrograde in late August. You are learning more about the importance of valuing yourself and your dreams this month and are overall seeing the positive progress that has come from you just believing in yourself and your vision for your life.
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVIRGO
Happy Birthday, Beautiful Virgo. The Sun is in your sign for most of September, and you are feeling the creativity, passion, and divinity in your life. New paths are opening up for you, and you are the perfect one to pave the way. You are inspiring others, shining your light, and creating experiences in your life that not only benefit you but those around you as well. The New Moon is in your sign this month on the 14th, and this further signifies the new beginning and magic you are personally bringing into your life this month.
September is a great time to manifest and focus on creating what works for you and what lights you up. With Mercury being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you have had to deal with miscommunication, delays, and disagreements. Mercury goes direct on September 15th, and you are seeing things clearer than ever and communicating with more clarity and strength than before. Through the challenges you have been through, you have only come out of it stronger and more fierce.
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLIBRA
September is about protecting your energy and using your time wisely, Libra. You have figured out who and what you want in your life and what you don’t- and there is no going back now. The more you can choose yourself, choose your values, and choose self-love, the greater impact the decisions you are making can have. The energy begins to move into your sign this month, and the focus turns on you, however, it’s up to you what you do with it.
Libra Season officially begins on September 23rd this year, and you are done with moving mountains and are ready to enjoy the view at the top. You have shown yourself what is possible for you in life, and you have stood your ground on the things that are important to you. On September 29th, there is a Supermoon in your opposite sign, Aries, and you are coming full circle in love. What goes around comes around, and your good karma in love is coming around.
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleSCORPIO
September is a spiritual month for you, Scorpio. The month begins in Virgo Season, and you flow well with this earthly energy. You are focused on stabilizing your emotions and really understanding your thought processes and inner discoveries this month, and it’s serving you well. Jupiter has been in your 7th house for the past few months, opening your eyes in love and blessing your relationships overall. This benevolent planet goes retrograde at the beginning of the month, and you may be feeling more tested over the next few months to see if you have done the work here.
The decisions you have made and the paths you have walked have all led you to where you are right now, and you are making sense of it all this month in a more vulnerable way. You are lighting your way forward, and the New Moon on the 14th is inspiring you to new heights. Manifestations are appearing, and you are recognizing your power as a creator. Before the month ends, there is a Supermoon in your 6th house of health, work, and routine, and you are taking care of business as the month ends.
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleSAGITTARIUS
This month is all about working smarter, not harder, Sagittarius. The potential for overworking or overthinking is likely this month, and you are being guided to take things one step at a time. You haven’t gotten to where you are now without your stamina and determination, and that energy isn’t going away now. With the Sun in your 10th house of career for most of the month, you are thinking about the legacy you want to lead right now.
Your ruling planet, Jupiter, goes retrograde this month and will be moving in retrograde motion in an area of your chart having to do with your daily life and well-being. Taking care of your health, planning thoroughly, and leaving room for growth in your working life is what this time is all about. A Supermoon is happening on the 29th before the month ends, and you are ready to focus more on love, your happiness, and the romance that you are being inspired by in your life right now.
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleCAPRICORN
Success is yours this month, Capricorn. This is a dynamic, powerful, and abundant month for you, and your efforts are being acknowledged. Something is shifting in your life in September, and you are truly feeling appreciated for who you are. You are inspired by the beauty you see in others, knowing this is a direct reflection of yourself, and you are claiming your blessings in September. Own your power, own your purpose.
The New Moon happening this month is occurring in fellow earth sign, Virgo, and it’s creating a new sense of adventure in your life. You are not attracted to the norm right now and are ready to step out of the box, learn new things, and connect with people who support you. The Supermoon on September 29th will be closing a chapter in your life, and this chapter has to do with your home, family life, emotional well-being, and sense of security. This month is about balancing your home and personal life with your professional one and knowing there is a difference.
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleAQUARIUS
September is all about patience, Aquarius. The work you have been putting in will show fruition, but more time and dedication may be needed this month. This is a good time to develop your skills and talents, expand your mind, and take intentional action on the things you are looking to grow in your life right now. With the Sun in your 8th house of commitment for most of the month, there is a lot on your plate, so remember to ask for help or support when you need it.
Mercury goes direct on the 15th in the same area the Sun currently is, your 8th house. With Mercury going direct mid-month, you are starting to see new developments, more ease, and greater balance in your close relationships. Intimacy feels like it’s blooming into something beautiful in your life, and you have been moving through an emotional transformation. Before the month ends, there is a Supermoon in your house of communication, and you can expect a message from the universe at this time. Listen to the guidance that is coming through for you this month.
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecolePISCES
September is a month to take a step back, process, and gain some renewed energy before moving forward again, Pisces. Mercury is retrograde in your 7th house of love until mid-September, so for the first half of the month, you may be dealing with some communication challenges and a lack of understanding of the heart. Your love life is going through a change, but you need time to process and define what that is truly going to mean for you in the long run.
Jupiter, one of your ruling planets, is also going retrograde in September and will be moving retro in your house of communication until the end of this year. Jupiter overall will be helping you find your voice and encouraging you to take up space. Remember that sometimes being you is more important than being understood. There is a New Moon on September 14th, and this is a good time to set your intentions for where you want to see your love life and relationships head, where the support is in your life, and how you can grow with love.
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- Surviving Mercury Retrograde: What You Can Expect This Mercury Retrograde ›
- Venus Goes Retrograde This Summer, Here’s What This Means For Your Love Life ›
- Your August 2023 Horoscopes Are All About Release & Ushering Love Into The Forefront ›
- What Summer 2023 Has In Store For You, Based On Your Zodiac Sign ›
RELATED
October 2025 Astrology: An Overview
Mercury enters Scorpio on October 6, and Mercury in Scorpio only knows depth. The conversations being had this month are inspiring, transformative, and a little more blunt than usual. This energy is good for the power of persuasion and for asking for what you want, especially within business and financial matters. On the same day, we have a Supermoon in Aries, and this is a powerful Full Moon for reflection, owning your power, and letting go of the insecurities that don’t resonate with what you want for yourself and your future.
Venus, the planet of love, moves into Libra on October 13 after being in Virgo for the past month, and after some time of healing and clarity in love, Libra is here to bring in the romance. Venus loves being in Libra, and this energy creates new beginnings within relationships and provides a little extra magic in this area of life. With Pluto going direct in Aquarius on the same day after being retrograde since May, life and love move forward mid-October, helping provide more stable and nurturing foundations in your personal life and community as well.
The New Moon of the month occurs in Libra on October 21, making it a beautiful time for manifesting romance, balance, and harmony in your world.
This New Moon aligns with the Sun in Libra, and it’s all about letting a new beginning transform your world and the love in your life for the better. Scorpio Season officially begins on October 22, and Neptune retrograde enters Pisces on the same day, bringing in some water sign energy into the mix. As we close out the month, it’s time to renew, honor the transformations occurring, and know that your dreams aren’t as far out of reach as they may seem at times.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what October 2025 has in store for you.
What October 2025 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
ARIES
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is all about perspective, Aries. This is the month to trust the divine timing of your life, and not let the what-ifs overwhelm you. With the Sun in Libra, your sister sign, for most of the month, October is about building connections, finding your balance in love, and knowing that you are worthy of what your heart is seeking right now. We have a Supermoon in your sign on October 6, and emotions are a little heavier this month, but also healing. Give yourself grace, and let go of what isn’t working for you.
Venus is in your house of love from October 13 until November 6, and there is a lot to look forward to when it comes to romance and the relationship dynamics in your life as you move through the month. It’s about being confident in your power of attraction and letting love come to you right now. Before October comes to an end, we have a New Moon in your 7th house of love as well, and with all this energy in your relationship zone, life changes for you in love for the better in October.
TAURUS
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is a spiritual month for you, Taurus. You are thinking a lot about your next steps ahead, and are getting organized, focused, and aligned. The Supermoon on October 6 is a time of reflection for you, and you are entering the month ready to let go of the past, heal, and create space for something new in your life. This month is all about trusting your intuition and letting your wisdom guide you in your personal growth and evolution.
You are more than where you have been, and this month is a reminder of that.
With Mars in Scorpio and in your 7th house of love all month, you are motivated by the partnerships in your life right now. Your love life and relationships are where the action is for you this month, and you are honoring your passion and direction here. Venus, your planetary ruler, moves into your house of health mid-month and into November, and you are leaving October seeking healthier habits, daily routines, and relationships. Overall, this month is helping you align with your vision.
GEMINI
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is a fresh start for you, Gemini. Your heart is free, love is beaming, and you are feeling larger than life. This month is about taking a leap of faith in yourself, honoring your confidence in life, and being your biggest advocate. With the Sun in your 5th house of self-expression, romance, and happiness, and with Venus entering this same area of your chart mid-October, there is a lot to look forward to right now, and things are looking up for you.
On October 21, we have a New Moon in a fellow air sign, and this is a good time to set your intentions for creative projects, hobbies, romance, and your overall happiness in life. There are a lot of little moments of magic unfolding for you this month, and this New Moon is one of them. Before October comes to an end, Mercury, your ruling planet, enters Sagittarius, and this brings open communication into your relationships, and you are having lively conversations and insights.
CANCER
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is a transformative month for you, Cancer. You are moving through closure, healing, and depth as you navigate the opportunities that are coming into your life, with the stability you are seeking. With the Sun in your 4th house of home and family in October, this is the month to spend more time in your safe spaces, connect with your loved ones, and get grounded. You are also more focused on your financial world right now, and this is a good time for building new foundations for yourself and looking at the bigger picture when it comes to your career and life goals.
Mars is in your house of romance and happiness for the entire month, and this is one of the highlights of your life right now. You are passionate about your joy and all the things that light you up inside, and you are protecting your peace and giving more of your energy to your pleasure. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Libra, highlighting your home life, and some Cancers may be moving at the end of the month or getting the opportunity to turn a page here. Overall, this is your month to reflect, go within, and make sense of what has been restricting you from feeling stable.
LEO
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is about taking things one day at a time and being patient with what is presenting itself to you, Leo. This month, you are getting your ducks in a row and gaining the clarity needed to create a new beginning in your life. The month begins with a Supermoon in a fellow fire sign on October 6, aligning in harmony with you and fueling your need for adventure. You are going over the wisdom you have gained as of late and how it has shifted the way you navigate your life and see the world around you.
On October 13, Pluto goes direct in your 7th house of love, after being retrograde here since May. This is bringing in more balance, empowerment, and passion into your love life, and this is a positive change of energy for you after a time of some power struggles within your relationships. Before the month comes to an end, we have a New Moon in Libra, and this New Moon is the best time to set intentions for clarity, communication, and connection. October is about taking your time with things and knowing that everything is working out in your favor at the end of the day.
VIRGO
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis October is about finding your balance, Virgo. There is a lot of energy when it comes to your finances this month, but you may be overworking or overcommitting yourself in the process. Honor the opportunities and responsibilities in your life, but make sure you are equally taking care of your health and prioritizing your time and energy so that you don’t burn out. Venus, the planet of love, is in your sign until October 13; use this energy to your benefit and let things come to you.
You are a magnet for abundance, romance, and support if you allow yourself to receive it.
On October 13, Venus moves into your 2nd house of income, and your relationships are a supportive place for you to lean on right now. Your love life and partnerships are where your financial world is evolving this month, and this is a good time to ask for what you want; you never know what may happen. At the end of the month, Neptune goes retrograde in your sister sign, Pisces, and you are taking a step back and reassessing what love means for you right now. Overall, October is about remembering that you don’t have to do it all alone, Virgo.
LIBRA
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLibra Season is here, and it’s your time to shine and thrive! This Libra Season changes everything for you, and October is when you really begin to feel this shift in your life. The Sun is in your sign until October 22, and it’s time to put yourself first. With a Supermoon in Aries as we begin the month as well, you are letting go of any unhealthy attachments or relationship dynamics that take you away from yourself, and are moving into deeper clarity.
On October 13, Venus, your planetary ruler, enters your sign, where it loves to be the most. With Venus in your sign for the rest of the month, love takes on a new tone, and you are feeling more love for yourself and where life is taking you right now. To end the month, we have a New Moon in Libra, and it’s time to set your intentions for where you want life to grow for you over the next year. This is a month of embarking on a new journey of self, and allowing what is inspiring you right now to build your confidence in yourself and your relationships.
SCORPIO
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is about honoring your freedom and your power to decide, Scorpio. A lot is going on for you this month, and you have the passion and energy to see things through. Mercury, the planet of communication, moves into your sign at the beginning of the month on October 6, and this is going to help you get your ideas across, making it a good month for business matters, networking, and getting inspired. With Mars also in your sign for the entire month, life moves forward for you in transformative ways in October, and you are a force to be reckoned with.
On October 13, Venus moves into your house of closure, healing, and endings, and you are ready to close one chapter of love and create space for a new one. You are in a contemplative space when it comes to matters of the heart, and you are ready to let go of any heaviness you have been feeling here. Scorpio Season officially begins on October 22, and you are ready to begin again. This Scorpio Season is about owning your confidence in life while letting go of insecurities or self-doubts that have been getting in the way of that.
SAGITTARIUS
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleEverything unfolds for you in a beautiful way this month, Sagittarius. You are flowing well with the energy of October, and life opens up to you. With the Sun in your 11th house of aspirations, dreams, manifestations, and community, you are feeling in balance with your desires and your reality, and are bridging the gap here. This is a month of friendship, believing in your dreams, and creating space for love. With Juno also entering your sign at the beginning of the month until the end of the year, you are attracting soulmates into your life.
On October 6, we have a Supermoon in a fellow fire sign, allowing you some closure in love and a chance at healing. Your heart is feeling renewed, and you are owning your power in creating happiness in your life. Before the month ends, Mercury moves into Sagittarius, where it will be until mid-November, and inspiration is heightened. Pay attention to the guidance you are receiving this month, the conversations you are having, and the light bulb moments that are going off for you right now.
CAPRICORN
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is about going within and connecting with the guidance of your soul, Capricorn. You are taking more time for yourself this month, and rightly so, as you need time to fully process what has happened so far this year. Pluto goes direct in your 2nd house of income, and this moves things forward when it comes to your earning potential, abundance, and values.
The key this month is in valuing yourself, your perspective, and what you are building in your life right now.
On October 21, we have a New Moon happening in your career zone, and this is a good time to manifest your goals within your professional world. Put yourself out there, show up, and know that you are worthy of success and that your dreams aren’t too big for you. As we close out the month, Mercury moves into your house of closure, even further facilitating your desire for contemplation and alone time this month. Overall, October is about taking care of your mental health, owning your successes, and finding your peace.
AQUARIUS
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleOctober is a new beginning for you in love and in life, Aquarius. Your heart is feeling inspired, and there is a lot to look forward to right now. The Supermoon at the beginning of the month will be occurring in your 3rd house of communication, giving you the answers you have been looking for and helping you close the door on a chapter in your life that left you feeling misunderstood or misdirected. You are ready for a change of pace this month, and you are receiving that as we begin October.
Mid-October, Pluto goes direct in your sign after being retrograde since May, and this is a huge breath of fresh air for you and your path ahead. You may have been a little harder on yourself while Pluto was retrograde this year, and now you feel ready to forgive, move on, and own your power. Before the month comes to an end, we have a New Moon in Libra, and you are embarking on a new adventure. The end of the month is a good time for traveling, exploring, and gaining a new perspective.
PISCES
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is giving you the guidance, perspective, and passion to see yourself with clear, loving eyes, Pisces. There is a sense of feeling more overwhelmed with life lately, and October is allowing you to gain the insight needed to move on from this energy, or at least see more of the gifts of what has occurred. On October 6, we have a Supermoon in an area of your chart having to do with self-worth, values, and income, and it’s time to see the gifts of what you have been investing in and valuing in your life, including yourself.
Let go of the need to play it small or count yourself out of important conversations, and know that you deserve a seat at the table.
With Pluto going direct in your 12th house of healing as we end the month, you are finally getting the answers you have been looking for emotionally, and it’s changing your perspective on your commitments in life and making you feel empowered. Before the month ends, Neptune goes retrograde in Pisces, and you are going to be moving through a personal revolution as we close out the year. You are inspired by change right now, and this month is what kicks starts this metamorphosis within you.
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And so, are you ready to see if you can get at least 10-15 more seconds out of the climaxes you have? I just might have some things to hook you all the way up below.
So, the Technical Term for It Is an “Extended Orgasm”
GiphyAight, so let’s get right into it. When you want to achieve the kind of orgasm that lasts longer than the — or probably the more accurate way to put it, your — average one does, that is called an extended orgasm. It’s important to not confuse this with multiple orgasms which are what happens when you climax and then come to the fourth stage of an orgasm (which is called a resolution) only to pick back up and start the cycle of orgasming all over again.
Nah, an extended orgasm is one long(er) climax that never comes to a resolution; it just holds at the climax position for a longer period of time.
And what would be the purpose of wanting to have one of those? C’mon now. If you’ve had an orgasm before, you absolutely know the answer to that; especially if you’re someone who tends to have orgasms that only last for a few seconds, max.
Okay, but really — what can you actually do to “see the mountaintop” for more than just a fleeting moment in time…every time? Well, I have 10 tips that would be hella fun (at the very least) to give a shot.
Tips To Make Your Orgasms Last Longer
1. Figure Out What Your Clitoris Likes (and Needs)
GiphySince once upon a time, I used to watch porn and then I transitioned into working with an organization that dealt with sex and porn addiction (check out “Working For A Porn Ministry Got Me Over Watching Porn”), I can tell when people have learned a lot of their sex moves via some consistent porn engagement. Like back in the day when I was gettin’ it in — I used to damn near loathe whenever a guy would try to pat on my vagina. That is such a porn move.
For me, I prefer a… gentler and more creative approach. And that’s exactly my point: since a clitoris literally only exists to bring women sexual pleasure — figure out what touches work for you, both in foreplay and during sex. After reading Healthline’s “The Ultimate Guide to Clitoral Stimulation,” I came to appreciate just how many ways there actually are. Check the article out then experiment with which ones are bomb for you.
2. Make Sure Your Partner Can Access Your Clitoris As Much As Possible
GiphySpeaking of your clitoris, if you were to go to Google to check out the AI overview of it, as it relates to having an orgasm, you are probably going to see something along the lines of, “The clitoris is the primary source of arousal and orgasm for most women, with direct stimulation of the clitoris being the easiest and most effective way to achieve orgasm, according to a large sample of women.” (At least, this is what came up for me.)
What this does as serve as a solid reminder that, whether it’s during foreplay or intercourse, it’s important to remain in a position where your partner can easily access (in order to stimulate) your clitoris as much as possible. That way, he can “manipulate” (via stimulation) your clitoris with certain amounts of applied pressure, so that having an extended orgasm is easier for you.
Certain positions that can help with this include spooning, being penetrated while you are on the edge of the bed and having sex while you’re acting like a wheel barrel. Artistic visuals of all of this can be found here.
3. Incorporate Scents That Reduce Stress
GiphyIt’s going to be difficult to have an orgasm if you’re all stressed out. That’s because, although sex is proven to reduce stress and anxiety levels, when it comes to climaxing, if your stress hormone (which is known as your cortisol hormone) is elevated, that can lower your libido and also your sex hormones; you don’t want that to happen because they are essential for you to have an orgasm in the first place. That’s why it’s critical that you lower the stress that you may be experiencing via all of your senses (sight, hearing, touch, taste and smell).
One way to do that is by incorporating scents that help to keep your stress levels down. Whether it’s essential oil in a diffuser, lighting some soy candles or spraying one of the following scents on your bedding (or all three) — try some jasmine, mandarin, rose, patchouli, lavender, neroli or frankincense. All are alluring. All are proven to relax your mind, body and spirit too.
4. Sip on Some Infused Berry Water
GiphyIf you’re dehydrated, it’s going to be hard to cum. That’s not my opinion, that’s a scientific fact. The breakdown is water helps to keep you (naturally) lubricated, it balances your hormones out and it also provides you with an energy boost. And while you’re at it, throw some berries into your pitcher or glass.
Since they are packed with antioxidants and anti-inflammatory properties, they are able to keep your blood flowing freely — which is definitely something that needs to happen if you want to have a long and satisfying orgasm (by the way, citrus fruits and pomegranates can do this for you too).
5. Try a Lil’ Yoga with Your Sex
GiphyBeing in a relaxed state and breathing properly are two things that definitely need to happen if you want to have a really good orgasm. That’s why yoga just had to come up — because it’s a form of exercise that incorporates both of these things. In fact, there are specific yoga poses that have a reputation for making copulation amazing including the Lizard, the Cat Cow and — surprise, surprise — the Downward Dog.
What’s cool about all of these is you can do them in your bedroom or incorporate them into intercourse (to learn more about yoga sex and, what is somewhat similar, tantric sex, go here, here and here).
6. If It’s via Oral Sex, Have Your Partner “Edge” You (with His Tongue)
GiphyIf it’s easier for you to climax from cunnilingus than intercourse, please don’t stress yourself out about that — at the end of the day, an orgasm is an orgasm…right? And while he’s doing his thing down there, be open to him edging you with his tongue and lips. Although people often think about edging in the context of people getting to the point of climaxing during intercourse and then delaying it over and over again (in order for the orgasm to ultimately be that much stronger), the reality is that edging is about sexual stimulation, period, no matter how it — pardon the pun — comes.
So, while he’s using his mouth to “take you there,” use your words (dirty words, preferably) to let him know when you’re about to climax — and then have him slow down the pace (with his tongue and lips), so that your orgasms can be…further extended.
7. Apply Some Arousal Gel
GiphyQuestion: Have you ever tried arousal gel before? If not, please make the investment. Although there is nothing that can automatically guarantee that you’ll experience the type of orgasm that you’re looking for, arousal gel can certainly help with accomplishing the mission. That’s because it contains ingredients that help to stimulate blood flow to your genitalia — and that always increases the chances of you experiencing some pretty intense climaxing.
So, if you want to give this gel a shot, click here for a list of some favorite brands.
8. Have Your Partner Focus on Another Erogenous Zone As You’re Climaxing
GiphyLet me tell you a woman who I personally think STILL doesn’t get the props that she deserves for her singing chops: some freakin’ Tamia. And y’all, when that woman sang “Stranger in My House” on Apollo? Whew. Yeah, the real ones know how the bridge goes — Pop quiz: Tell me where we first kissed. Tell me where my spot is. Tell me if I liked it, loved it. LISTEN.
You wanna have a hellified orgasm, you (and your partner) better know where your spots are. And when you are at the point of cumming, have him, umm, indulge in one of those spots along with penetrating you. I’d be damn near shocked if your head didn’t almost explode if/when he does.
9. Do Some Tongue Sucking (Again, As You Are Climaxing)
GiphySpeaking of multitasking, a few years back, I penned an article for the platform entitled, “Wanna Climax More? KISS MORE.” Aside from the fact that some people are able to orgasm just from kissing alone, it can definitely take you to next levels of arousal during sex. That’s because kissing releases hormones like oxytocin, dopamine and serotonin that not only make you feel closer to your partner but it can help to sexually stimulate you too.
And if the two of you engage in tongue sucking while you’re kissing? GIRRRRRL…tongues have a ton of nerve endings which makes them super sensitive to touch or lick — let alone…suck. Try it and tell me that I’m wrong (you won’t).
10. Squeeze Your Thighs Together
GiphyPlease don’t tell me that I’m the only one who is literally shaking your damn head about the movie Waiting to Exhale being 30 years old this year (the book is even better, by the way). Geeze. And as I wrap this “You totally deserve to have an extended orgasm” cheat sheet up, I thought about the scene where Robin (Lela Rochon) and Michael (Wendell Pierce) were having sex and she said that when she squeezed her hips/thighs real tight, she exploded.
And this is my final tip when it comes to how to make your orgasms last longer. The technical term for it is syntribation (which basically means “hands-free masturbation”). Pretty much what happens is, when you squeeze your thighs together, it stimulates your clitoris — and when you’re doing this while a penis is already inside of you? NEED. I. SAY. MORE?
___
Life is short. Have longer orgasms.
Hell, somebody needs to put that on a T-shirt — no, billboards all throughout the country! LOL.
With these tips, I’m thinking that you now can, so try them out and report back.
I can’t wait!
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Featured image by Giphy