
Here's Why You Should Be More Intentional About Developing Work Friendships

It was in 2010 when I realized that establishing work friendships was important. I had started working at my second internship which was—at that point in my life—the closest to full-time work I had experienced. The office was preparing to launch a major initiative that my coworker and I were hired to coordinate. Both of us were college students. Neither of us had any experience doing something like this.
While he and I grew closer, I found myself retreating to an older black woman to help me process and handle the hardships of the project: the poor instruction, the lack of guidance, the dysfunctional leadership, and ultimately, the challenges on the day of. She became a sounding board for me during difficult times, and when I decided it was time for me to move on, she was there as well; supporting me boldly and covering for me as my attitude became reflective of my unhappiness.
Despite the popular belief that work is no place to make friends, I have always believed in the power of work friendships. I thought that, if nothing else, those friendships could certainly help pass the time. They could make the darkest day a little brighter and add humor to the dullest work meetings.
But it wasn't until I experienced the love of an older black woman in a toxic workspace that I realized that work friendships were not only important for my enjoyment of a role but that they are critical to my progress and success as a young professional black woman. Here's why:
Building Positive Relationships At Work
Find your "work auntie", find your champion.
That's what I call them—work aunties. A term of endearment for only the most well-intentioned, supportive, nurturing female co-workers.
At every job that I'd had for more than a year, there's been an older black woman (or two) who's been willing to go to war for—and with—me. Women who knew how to support me in the throes of a trying work culture. Women whose prayers have revived and re-centered me when I was preparing to jump off the deep end.
They will lift you up time and time again.
They've helped me navigate difficult breakups and made themselves available to me during mid-work breakdowns. They've told me about myself when my personal life was impeding on my work performance—and would cover me just the same when I couldn't muster up the strength to focus on improving it.
Wonderful black (and some, white) women who affirmed me when impostor syndrome and self-doubt set in. Women who knew my worth and made sure others knew it as well. Women who petitioned for me for promotions, special projects, and raises. Women who didn't have to do any of that but chose to anyway.
See, as a young 20-something-year-old, those relationships were critical to my professional growth—especially as a woman of color. And that shared responsibility of love and support in the workplace wasn't foreign to me either.
In return, you can be a bomb af "work niece".
Offering love and support to the women who felt stuck and unfulfilled. I added a bit of laughter and intercession to the women who spent all day supporting others. I provided a millennial perspective to those who had children my age and added a drop of understanding to their parenthood.
There's so much untapped value in cultivating tight-knit friendships in the place you spend most of your waking hours. There's comfort in being able to confide in people who know exactly what you mean when you discuss colleagues, the demands of your job, or the toxic work culture. There's beauty in being able to walk into a co-worker's office, close their door, and cry to keep yourself from quitting. Beyond just professional benefits—references, a network, and growth opportunities—there's this inconceivable beauty created by forging meaningful friendships with co-workers.
Developing positive work relationships is the gift that keeps on giving if you allow it.
While I've never started a job hoping to make friends, some of the most meaningful friendships I've had have been cultivated through work. They've been nurtured by break room vent sessions; honored by "I'm running late, cover for me" text messages; and protected by "let's get this done together" project collaborations.
We've formed prayer groups during our lunch hour and started walking groups for the sake of mental health and physical fitness. We've celebrated each other's promotions and supported each other's personal work.
And while I know work relationships like this are rare, I also know that they are possible. I merely suggest that, instead of shying away from them, women begin to pursue and embrace them. I pray that women find work aunties and become them, too. And largely, I hope that these relationships begin to help you just as much as they've helped me.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
3 Compelling Reasons To Make Friends With Women You Work With
5 Ways To Get Taken More Seriously At Work
What Happened When I Tried Being More Assertive At Work
9 Lessons I Learned After Working 9 Internships
Featured image by Shutterstock.
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Zoe Hunter is the writer, speaker, and creator behind the women empowerment brand DEAR QUEENS. She uses vulnerability, storytelling, and spiritual development to empower women toward healthy decision-making. Stay connected to Zoe's work by visiting DEARQUEENS.com or following her on Twitter @zDEARQUEENS.
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Celebrate International Women's Day With Wellness, Empowerment & More
International Women’s Day, celebrated on Saturday, March 8th, presents an excellent opportunity to honor and celebrate women. As March marks Women’s History Month, there are numerous chances throughout the month to pay tribute to the remarkable contributions of women.
Both International Women's Day and Women's History Month serve as reminders of the progress made toward gender equality and the work still left to do.
They inspire ongoing advocacy for women's rights, fostering discussions on issues such as workplace discrimination, healthcare access, and representation in leadership. By celebrating women's contributions and amplifying their voices, these observances help pave the way for a more inclusive and equitable future.
Here are four ways to celebrate International Women's Day and Women's History Month.
Attend a Women History Month Event
This month, there are numerous events happening, particularly for International Women’s Day. One such event is organized by Media Girls Network, which will be held over a multi-day period starting on Thursday. The entire event is dedicated to celebrating women.
On Friday, the organization will honor prominent women in business and entertainment, including the OMG Girlz, celebrity restauranteur Gocha Hawkins, and more.
On Saturday, guests can indulge in a day of wellness and self-care, featuring a fitness class, massages, a journaling workshop, and other activities. For more information about these events, visit www.mediagirlsontour.com.
Support a Woman-Owned Business
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Reports indicate that women constitute 39.1% of business owners, and this percentage is steadily rising. In light of this, let’s celebrate and support women-owned businesses this month.
Here are a few ways to do so: shop at their establishments, leave positive reviews, follow and engage with them on social media, collaborate with them, or contribute to their crowdfunding efforts.
Support Women's Rights Groups
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Since President Trump took office, we’ve witnessed an unprecedented number of rights being reversed, including DEI programs. Women have been particularly concerned about his decision regarding abortion and reproductive rights. Recently, he dismissed the Idaho Emergency Abortion case, which was a legal battle to ensure Idahoans had access to emergency abortion care.
Writing in her Substack blog, Abortion, Everyday, journalist and abortion rights advocate, Jessica Valenti, said, “By dropping this case, the Trump administration is sending a clear message that anti-abortion states don’t have to adhere to [the Emergency Medical Treatment and Labor Act] by giving pregnant patients life-saving care.”
Instead of waiting on Trump's next move regarding women's rights, support women's rights organizations and charities like In Our Own Voice Action Fund and Planned Parenthood.
Empower Others
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Use your voice to raise awareness about the challenges women encounter. This can be achieved through social media platforms or by speaking at local rallies and events. By leading by example, you can inspire others to get involved and contribute to the support.
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