

In xoNecole's Our First Year series, we take an in-depth look at love and relationships between couples with an emphasis on what their first year of marriage was like.
When life hits you with unexpected news, like the loss of a loved one, it can be difficult to know how to move on. Grief is something we all experience and it is something that stays with us forever. But it is within grief that we try to find the joy in order to keep moving forward. That was the case for Briana Hampton, who is an entrepreneur/author based out of Atlanta, Georgia. After losing her mother to cancer in 2015, Briana navigated through her grief by trying her best with keeping herself busy in her career as a model.
One day, when Briana sent a Facebook message to her now-husband Robert Hampton, aka Latruth, about a possible career opportunity, she did not expect her life to take a turn for the better. Now after four years of marriage, both Briana and Robert are enjoying life to the fullest.
The couple was able to sit down with xoNecole and share more on how their initial connection has kept them married after all these years. For Briana and Robert, it was the ability to connect on an experience that is one of the hardest realities to have to endure. The way Briana and Robert could relate to each other would be how they took a chance on love. After months of talking, the couple knew immediately that they wanted to take things to the next level. While they met one another and bonded over the feeling of grief, they were each other's light to get out of a familiar dark tunnel. Here's what they had to share.
How They Met
Briana: "I reached out to him via Facebook. At the time, I was a model and I reached out to him for a promotion opportunity. He responded and asked me for my number and till this day, I still haven't gotten that promo (laughs). When he called me, I thought we were going to talk about how much the shoot was going to cost and stuff. But it led to asking questions to get to know more about me and after I realized what he was doing, I figured to just see where this was going to go. While we were talking, we got to the topic of my mom passing away recently. He shared that his mother passed away from cancer too. Instantly, that was a click for me."
Robert: "Yeah, that's the gist of how we met. When I saw her message and looked at her photos, I thought she was very beautiful. After she gave me her number, I contacted her and just went from there. I lost my mom when I was five years old. I don't think I ever met anyone else who lost their mom too. When she mentioned her mom recently passed, that was definitely something that made me take the wall down and open up to her more. We talked for hours into days without seeing each other face to face. So the chemistry between us was built."
"When she mentioned her mom recently passed, that was definitely something that made me take the wall down and open up to her more. We talked for hours into days without seeing each other face to face. So the chemistry between us was built."
The One
Briana: "When my mom passed away, I was going through it. So when I met him, I was grieving her and I felt all the signs of her were coming through him. Whether it was our conversation and just our similarities, I felt my mom sent me an angel. Even our moms were similar in many ways that I just said, 'I got it, I am listening.' I knew that this was the person for me. Since my children's father, I never took anyone seriously. So when we were able to bond with each other's children, that made me more certain about him. When I moved to Atlanta, I expressed that for the long-term, I want marriage. I knew he was the man I wanted to be with and the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was my biggest cheerleader and that was it for me. He wasn't someone that wanted to control me, but wanted what was best for me and the family. He wanted to be the man to lead us down the right path."
Robert: "For me, it's loyalty over love. You meet a lot of people and they say they love you, but the loyalty doesn't match. I could tell that she was different from other women when it came down to loyalty, so that was key for me. Also, like she said, allowing me to lead was big for me. I don't think I've experienced love like this. For somebody to love me the way she loved me, that was it for me. With both of our moms passing and being able to be there for each other, we supported each other when times were hard. She also enjoys me being around her. I really believe that being with her, it's like my oxygen. You feel you can't breathe without her."
Biggest Fears
Robert: "My biggest fear was being with a woman who didn't understand my career. I worked my whole life in the entertainment industry. So I wanted someone who understood what that meant for me and who supported me in my career. I know with entertaining, it is hard to trust entertainers. Being more communicative with one another and building that trust helped me let go of my fears."
Briana: "My biggest fear was being with someone that will end up failing me and my children. Mainly putting my trust into something and it doesn't succeed. How I was able to let go of that fear was me paying more attention to his actions and less go by his words. We may seem like we disagree with something, but his actions will tell me that he is listening and he cares. He makes me feel secure and that is what means the most to me."
"I knew he was the man I wanted to be with and the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was my biggest cheerleader and that was it for me. He wasn't someone that wanted to control me, but wanted what was best for me and the family. He wanted to be the man to lead us down the right path."
Baggage Claim
Briana: "One thing I will say is that my husband is very friendly. So there were some flirting issues in the beginning of our marriage. I don't have a problem with people being friendly. But it is the way you go about it that gives a woman the idea that she has a chance with you is what bothers me. When you engage with someone in that way, they are going to take advantage of that. It was hard for me to communicate that that kind of behavior hurt my feelings. Over time, I had to learn how to actively communicate my feelings to him. I also had to grow accustomed to how the entertainment world works. Since then, he has changed his approach when he engages with other women. I think it is much better than before. He has changed the flirting a lot since then, for me."
Robert: "I don't feel like Briana had any habits for her to break. I just felt like she needed to understand more how the entertainment business works. Coming into the marriage, I have a huge fanbase and it is mostly women. With that, I handle certain situations the way I handle it and sometimes my wife wasn't comfortable with that. But after some time, I was able to show her that this is mainly business and that I separate that from personal. I had to be more mindful on how my behavior affects her and be more considerate. Before marriage, I was a single guy and I never had anyone question anything that I do. It was definitely an adjustment for me because I felt in the back of my mind that I was always doing something wrong at first."
Love Lessons
Briana: "The most important lesson I've learned is how to listen better and be able to effectively communicate. It's important to listen to understand someone instead of listening just to respond. Let me tell you, I'm a Cancer, so if you try to hurt me, a Cancer will hurt you back! (Laughs) I was never taught how to effectively communicate my feelings, so it was a learned behavior to be in defense mode instead of speaking about how I really feel."
Robert: "For me, the biggest lesson is realizing that something that may seem small to me, may be major for the other person. I think that is in a lot of relationships. Going back to me being used to just doing what I want to do. When you are in a partnership, you can't do what you want to do anymore (laughs). So being able to understand each other's perspective on things and take a moment in the other person's shoes was helpful for me in this marriage."
"I make it a point to continue to date my husband within our marriage. Dating each other helps us learn more about each other as we grow over the years and elevate in different areas."
Best Advice
Briana: "I wasn't given any advice about marriage going into it. What I will say is that even though you are married to someone, it is important to keep the fire alive. I make it a point to continue to date my husband within our marriage. Dating each other helps us learn more about each other as we grow over the years and elevate in different areas."
Robert: "I didn't get any advice either. I had to learn a lot of things on my own. I do hate that I didn't get any advice, but I wish that someone that told me about how to handle conflict. You have to handle things differently after you make this commitment. Growing up, I didn't have a lot of people guiding me. But I always made the right decision when it came to doing the right thing. I think that speaks volumes about my character as a man."
For more of the Hamptons, follow them on Instagram @mrslatruth and @_latruth.
Featured image via The Hamptons
'K' is a multi-hyphenated free spirit from Chicago. She is a lover of stories and the people who tell them. As a writer, 9-5er, and Safe Space Curator, she values creating the life she wants and enjoying the journey along the way. You can follow her on Instagram @theletter__k_.
On her debut album,CTRL,SZA crooned about her desire to be a “Normal Girl.” Now, nearly eight years since its release, her Not Beauty line represents her commitment to existing outside of traditional beauty norms.
The singer whose real name is Solána Imani Rowe first teased the idea of a lip gloss line during Super Bowl LIX in February, noting that the release would be happening “very shortly.” Not Beauty debuted simultaneously with the Grand National Tour, which she co-headlines with Kendrick Lamar, in Minneapolis on April 19.
Each Not Beauty pop-up would offer fans the opportunity to purchase the glosses, learn more about the brand, and have the opportunity to meet the superstar in the flesh regardless of their ticket status.
During the Los Angeles tour stop, which spanned three dates on May 21, May 23, with the finale on May 24, xoNecole had the opportunity to test out the glosses included in this soft launch, as SZA revealed in a statement that "this is just the start of other lip products, including plans to launch stains, liners, and creams all inspired by SZA's “infamous layered lip combinations.”
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So, what is included in the first Not Beauty launch?
The current Not Beauty products available are lip glosses that come in three shades: In the Flesh, Strawberry Jelly, and Quartz.
During my visit to the first LA Not Beauty pop-up activation, I not only had the chance to purchase all three glosses but also took a peek inside the blow-up log tent. Inside, fans got to experience SZA’s love for nature and her fascination with bugs, which are prominently featured in her performances for this tour. At one point, she even had human preying mantis prancing across the stage y'all.
There were blow-up photos of the beauty that is SZA for fans (myself included) to take photos, but in wooden-like tree trunks were a deeper dive into some of the ingredients featured in her products and their benefits.
For example, the glosses feature Hi-Shine Lip Jelly and Shea Butter as key ingredients and some of the listed benefits included are:
- Shea Butter - “A powerhouse ingredient, offering both functional and nourishing benefits.”
- Hi-Shine Lip Jelly (featured in the In the Flesh shade) - “Formula glides on with perfect adhesion to the lips without stickiness).
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What are in the products?
Featured in an orange package, with images of a bug and flower on the side, the back of the box reads: “It’s NOT BEAUTY, it just works. Developed by Solána “SZA” Rowe.
As someone who never leaves home without a good lip gloss, I loved how compact the wood panel packaging is. Perfect to slip into my purse, or in the case of the show at SoFi Stadium, into my pocket when I’m not carrying a bag.
Because I’m a sucker for a good black and brown lip liner and clear gloss combo, I decided to wear the Quartz flavor on night one of the Grand National Tour LA stop, and it did not disappoint. I’ll admit, it’s light weight feel made me nervous because it felt like there was nothing on my lips. However, when I checked my lips in my compact mirror several times throughout the night, I was shocked to find that my gloss was still intact. I only reapplied once out of the habit of looking cute and applying my gloss, but not necessity.
Here are some of the ingredients featured, but not limited to, in the Quartz flavor.
- Polyisoubutene
- Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea)Butter
- Ricinus Communis (Castor) Seed Oil
- Mentha Piperita (Peppermint) Oil
- Tocopherol
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Lip prep
I’m a simple girl who loves to stay true to her roots. So ahead of the show, I stopped by a local Inglewood Beauty Supply store and grabbed a Black and Brown shade lip pencil for just under $2 a piece.
Shading the outline of my lips with the black pencil first, I used the brown to lightly fill the inside of my lips before applying my Quartz Not Beauty shade gloss.
How to apply
There’s truly no right or wrong way to apply lip gloss (in my opinion), with this being a brush applicator sort of product, I simply untwisted the top and swiped the gloss around my top and bottom lip generously.
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Results
Again, my Not Beauty Quartz product stayed on my lips from the start of the show, which began with a fire DJ set from LA’s very own, Mustard, to the conclusion when Kendrick and SZA reunited on stage to send us home to their duet, “luther,” featured on the rapper's GNX album.
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It’s almost always “annoyingly fun” to have conversations with super churchy folks. Example? Recently, I had on an anklet that a particular woman took notice of. When she complimented it and asked what it was made of, I said, “Moonstone, which is one of my birthstones.” Oddly enough, she then turned up her nose and said that stones and crystals were tied to witchcraft, to which I casually replied, “Then I guess you hate Aaron’s breastplate, huh?” She paused and turned her nose up again — this time, though, because she just experienced a good old-fashioned “checkmate.”
This article is about crystals not Scripture, so when it comes to the latter, I’ll just briefly say that if you mosey on over to Exodus 28, you’ll see that a high priest breastplate is referenced; one that contains precious gems including topaz, sapphire, agate, onyx and jasper (and that’s just for starters!). Yeah, it really is important to not just throw judgments around like confetti — know of what you are actually speaking of first (because that’s what Matthew 7 is really all about).
I did think it was important to mention that for potential skeptics about why this article even exists. Because although there are Scriptural and evenscience-based individuals who roll their eyes at the power of what gemstones and crystals can (possibly) do, I’m pretty sure that some of you are not surprised that the holistic and Ayurveda worlds see it all very differently.In those realms, energy plays a big role in physical, emotional, and mental health, and crystals are believed to cultivate balance or intensify certain feelings or experiences through that said energy.
That said, when it comes to sex, specifically, there are certain stones (which are basically what crystals are;in fact, all gemstones are a type of crystal) that are believed to help make intimacy even more satisfying. If you’re curious about which ones are, I’ve got 10 for you below.
10 Crystals That May Enhance Your Intimate Life
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1. Garnet
Garnet is a rich shade of red that happens to be January’s gemstone. It’s considered to be one of the oldest gemstones around, one that Egyptians believed was a symbol of life and something that they oftentimes wore in their signet rings. As far as symbolism goes, garnet also represents love and vitality as well as energy, passion and even self-confidence — all of which are quite relevant when it comes to having an active and fulfilling sex life.
2. Amethyst
Queen Cleopatra and Leonardo da Vinci are just two powerful figures who were big fans of the purple gemstone amethyst. Interestingly enough, it is February’s birthstone — the month that Valentine’s Day falls under. Another interesting fact is many early Christians relied on this gem in order to increase their spirituality while many Greeks used to see it as a stone that provided protection. When it comes to intimacy, amethyst is also associated with love and devotion as well as feelings of calm and reduced anxiety — and since the less calm you feel, the easier it is to climax…well. #wink
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3. Orange Carnelian
Looking to experience more joy and happiness? Or maybe you want to strengthen your friendships. Or perhaps it’s time to increase your pleasure levels or to go into deeper levels of sensuality. For all of these things, orange carnelian is a top-tier pick. As I did a bit more research on this stone, it’s considered to be a royal one and something that can bring forth peace. One of my favorite things about orange carnelian is it comes in different hues of orange — the deeper the color, the more passion it exudes. Just an FYI.
4. Rose Quartz
If you want to take your romantic relationship to another level, rose quartz has a solid reputation for helping to make that happen for you. In fact, this pink crystal is oftentimes referred to as being the stone of unconditional love because it encourages the wearers of it to both give as well as put themselves in the position to receive love too. Since rose quartz is also tied to things like emotional healing, restored trust and harmony, if you’re looking to make a much deeper intimate connection with your partner, this just might be the stone for you.
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5. Rhodochrosite
Rhodochrosite is a red-rose colored stone that I personally hold dear. I say that because, as a survivor of sexual abuse, it is one that helps recovering individuals to work through sexual trauma (and trauma, in general). It is associated with love, compassion and strength as it helps you to process your emotions in a positive way, so that you are able to effectively release past pain and deal with any PTSD that you might have. You know, I know a wife who sexually struggled in her marriage for years because she had been sexually assaulted in college and never told her husband.
A stone of compassion is a precious one — including when it comes to dealing with sexual trauma and intimacy challenges and learning how to face them. Salute to this stone right here.
6. Citrine
Citrine is November’s birthstone and its rich yellow color explains why it represents things like abundance, prosperity, radiance and happiness. Aside from this, whether you’re seeking clarity, you’d like to be more creative or you’re interested in becoming more sensual, citrine encourages all of this. Sensuality is a dope word because it’s all about appealing to all five senses; especially during intimacy. To learn more about how to do that, check out “How To Incorporate All Five Senses To Have The Best Sex Ever.”
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7. Red Jasper
While doing my own research on what red jasper represents, what I liked the most is it’s something that encourages emotional stability which is always a wonderful thing to have. Although it is a fiery red color, it also contains grounding properties and it symbolizes strength, courage and, another word that can always make sex more pleasurable: stamina. Since stamina is what helps both men and women to last longer during sex, anything that is a “stamina hack” earns an automatic mention when it comes to sex-themed content — including this.
8. Clear Quartz
A fun fact about quartz is it’s one of the most common minerals on this planet. When it comes to clear quartz, specifically, I like the way that it looks because it’s either a cloudy white or something that you can see straight through. As far as its symbolism is concerned, if you want to reduce physical discomfort, remove distractions and focus more on heightened levels of yourself, this crystal represents all of that. Clear quartz also encourages healing, spiritual growth and balance. To me, it seems like if you want to cultivate a spiritual or meditative (check out “What Exactly Is 'Orgasmic Meditation'?”) experience with your partner, clear quartz is a stone to try.
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9. Shiva Lingam
I ain’t got no lies to tell you — when I first happened upon this particular stone, the first thing that came to my mind was an article that I penned for the site back in the day entitled, “Blow Your Man's Mind By Giving Him This Tantalizing Massage.” That’s because it explains what a lingam massage is and, as you can see, this crystal has that word all up in it. The history of lingam is a bit layered (you can read about it here); however, because it is considered by many to be a phallic symbol and that typically represents the penis — shiva lingam is a neutral-colored crystal that represents both sexuality as well as fertility. Shocking, right? #sarcasm
10. Pyrite
It doesn’t escape me that it’s kind of funny that I’m closing this out with a crystal that has the nickname “fool’s gold.” That’s due to its appearance. That said, it’s also a stone that has some interesting symbolism to it. Since it comes from a Greek word that means fire — of course, it’s a crystal of passion. Since it also taps into things like heightened energy, self-esteem, creativity, awakened senses and the removal of toxic thoughts — if any stone should be in your “let’s get it on” crystal collection, pyrite would be the one!
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Know what’s kinda wild? While I was on Etsy’s site looking for another moonstone, a sake popped up in my feed on what the merchant calls their “libido crystal set” — and six of the 10 stones that I’ve mentioned throughout this article are featured in the collection.
Yeah, I’ll take that as a confirmation that whether you purchase a piece of jewelry that has one (or more) of these stones or you buy a piece of crystal itself to place somewhere in your bedroom — just putting your own energy into wanting a better sex life is a powerful step in the right direction to achieving it.
And what science can’t refute is the benefits of positive thoughts and actions — crystals or not.
So, if precious stones are totally your thing — enjoy, sis. Enjoy!
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