Please Stop Eating These Breakfast Foods ASAP
OK. So raise your hand if breakfast is your absolute favorite meal of the day. If that's the case, is it because of all of the health benefits that this particular meal offers (more energy, a kick in your metabolism, a boost of productivity, etc.)? Or is it because of the type of foods that you like to eat; ones that just happen to be your absolute favorite ones overall? If the answer is "B", while I'm certainly not out here to rain on any parades, I do want to encourage you to check out these 10 foods, just to see if the kind of breakfasts that you're having is working for or against you.
If, at the end of this, you discover that the answer to that little dilemma is also "B", while I'm not saying that you've got to go without the foods that bring you so much joy forever, you definitely should strongly consider pushing your plate back more often. Breakfast is supposed to be both good to and for you. To make sure that happens, certain foods need to be consumed sparingly. Here are the ones that top the "Yeah, you might want to be careful with that" breakfast list.
1. ONLY Fruit Juice
Fruit juice comes from fruit and fruit is good for you; therefore, everything about fruit juice can't be the devil—and it's not. The antioxidants in fruit juice can help to boost your immune system and detoxify your body at the same time. Fruit juice is also a quick and delicious way to get certain vitamins and minerals into your system. Problem is, a lot of us don't drink pure fruit juice. Instead, we go for a cocktail or some other form of juice that is loaded with sugar. In fact, I once read an article that said juices like Ocean Spray 100% Cranberry Juice and Minute Maid Enhanced Pomegranate Blueberry actually contain more sugar than freakin' soda does!
If you don't want to drink only water in the morning, I get it. But try and either squeeze your own juice and/or check out this list of brands to buy and ones to avoid. Oh, and always remember that fructose, even though it comes from fruit, is still sugar. And when it comes to sugar consumption, moderation is always key.
2. Breakfast Bars
I know. Breakfast bars are convenient AF. Here's the thing, though. When was the last time you checked the ingredients on the label to see how many words you could actually pronounce? Unfortunately, some of the most popular breakfast bars are loaded with sugar and preservatives; ones that can cause your blood sugar levels to skyrocket, if you're not careful. If you still want to eat 'em but you'd like a cheat sheet to determine which are better than the rest, I've got you.
An article on The Daily Meal's site shared that ones like KIND Blueberry Breakfast Bars and Go Raw Raisin Crunch Sprouted Bar are pretty good for you while others like Kellogg's Special K Chocolate Peanut Butter Protein Meal Bar and Nutri-Grain Fruit & Oat Harvest Baked Apple Cinnamon, you need to take a hard pass on. Whatever you go with, try not to make breakfast bars a staple. Eat them when you are truly in a pinch.
3. Flavored Yogurt
Ah, yogurt. Precious yogurt. Let's go with the good news first. Yogurt is full of calcium, vitamins B and D, phosphorus, magnesium, and potassium. Most yogurts contain probiotics too. If you're looking for a meat alternative to get a good amount of protein into your system, yogurt's totally got your back. Some studies even indicate that yogurt can help to keep your heart healthy. Problem is, if you opt for flavored yogurt, between the artificial flavoring and coloring and sugar content, you could end up doing your system more harm than good.
As far as figuring out which yogurt is best, the first thing to keep in mind is to apply the "less is more" rule when reading the label. In other words, the more ingredients that you see, the more you're increasing your chances of taking things into your body that it doesn't need. That said, make sure that sugar isn't in the top 3-5 ingredients. Also, check to see that the percentage of Vitamin D that the yogurt contains is on the higher side. Something else that can help you out is the article, "What's the Healthiest Yogurt? We Asked a Nutritionist". It breaks down some pretty popular brands and why some are—and aren't—healthy for you.
4. Sugary Cereal
Does nothing make you happier than a big ole' bowl of cereal? If so, I'm not gonna ruin that for you. The pros to eating cereal are that many of them are a great source of whole grains, fiber, protein, healthy carbs, and even vitamins like B-complex and Vitamin E. Thanks to all of this, cereal can be a great way to give yourself an energy kick at the start of your day. The "con" is a lot of us don't opt for boxes of unprocessed cereal (cereal where grains haven't been ground to a pulp and then mixed with sugar and preservatives before being dried and packaged). We prefer the kind that has as much sugar and artificial colors and flavors as possible. And considering that men should only consume around 36 grams of sugar a day, we should take in no more than 25-30 grams, and some cereal brands have double that amount per serving—well, I'm pretty sure you can see why sugary cereals are the ultimate breakfast no-no.
So, how do you go about selecting a cereal that will do more than just our taste buds good? Well, the more whole grain you see listed on the label, the better. Under 10 grams of sugar per serving is wise. Also, try and avoid cereals that contain "processed fiber" because they won't be able to keep you as regular or lower your cholesterol levels like unprocessed fiber can.
(By the way, if you wanna know if your favorite "junk food cereal" tops the list, check out "28 of the World's Highest Sugar Cereals". Brace yourself. Some on there may catch you totally off guard.)
5. Instant Oatmeal
A lot of us grew up having oatmeal for breakfast, at least a couple of times a week. Good thing too because oatmeal is considered to be a whole grain food that contains an unbelievable amount of manganese (141 percent of your reference daily intake), along with phosphorus, magnesium, copper, iron, zinc, folate, and vitamins B1 and B5. Oatmeal also has the antioxidants avenanthramides in it that can help to lower your blood pressure, the fiber Beta-glucan that promotes bacteria into your digestive tract and, there is even a study that says that babies who eat oatmeal significantly lower their chances of getting asthma later in life.
Just make sure that the oatmeal that you eat isn't instant. The packaging of them alone sounds off alarms about how many preservatives they contain. Plus, it's pretty common for instant oatmeal to have more sugar and less fiber than if you make a bowl the old-fashioned way.
6. Frozen Waffles
If I had a favorite breakfast comfort food, it would probably be French toast first with waffles being a close second. They both are delicious, but neither is the healthiest on the planet. Honestly, they're basically considered to be a pastry and, as far as waffles go, they are usually loaded with white flour and sugar—and that's before you pile on butter and syrup. The only thing more unhealthy than a homemade waffle is a frozen one.
If you look at the label, it usually doesn't have nearly enough of the daily amount of fiber that your body needs while still offering up plenty of preservatives to keep those waffles sitting in your freezer for weeks on end. Hey, I don't want to deprive anyone (including myself) of some chicken and waffles every now and then, but try and save that for special occasions rather than making it your automatic weekend go-to, OK? Cool.
7. Toaster Pastries
Out of everything on this list, the one that I'll probably have the shortest commentary on is toaster pastries. You know, like Pop-Tarts. They're like edible Kool-Aid if you ask me and there is nothing good, healthy, or beneficial about that. They are off-the-charts with the sugar, very low when it comes to fiber and protein, and then have the nerve to come two per package which means you're taking in a ton of empty calories. So, since there is really nothing redeemable about them, how about taking a firm pass, even if you're tempted to eat them, just for nostalgia's sake?
8. Bagels
Hmm. A toasted bagel with butter used to be a fave food of mine. If you also enjoy this particular food (only with cream cheese or some other topping), let me start with why bagels aren't necessarily the worst of the worst when it comes to breakfast options. Each bagel is around 11 grams of protein, three grams of fiber, and a fair amount of manganese, copper, vitamin B-1, and even a bit of iron and zinc. The challenge is they are also high in calories, refined carbs, and, oftentimes gluten too—and that's before you put your toppings on!
Bottom line, if bagels are your thing, you definitely don't need to eat them daily, you should go with a topping like hummus or nut butter, and to get some extra protein into your system, consider topping your bagel with an egg, a slice of salmon or protein—just to balance everything out.
9. Jellies
Here's the thing about most jellies. More times than not, the more popular brands contain a ton of high fructose corn syrup (you can read more about why that is the devil incarnate here), artificial coloring, artificial flavors, and preservatives. Nothing about any of that is good for you (no matter how great the combination may taste). So, it really is best to leave commercial brands alone altogether.
The only exception is if you go with a brand that is as natural as possible. That way, you can take advantage of the pectin (which is a form of fiber) and other nutrients that the fruit that makes the jelly provides. To tell you the truth, the healthiest jelly that you can eat is the kind you make at home (get tips on how to do that here). But if you'd prefer to get some at your local grocery store, Welch's Natural Concord Grape Spread is a jelly that contains no high fructose corn syrup, artificial colors, or flavors. (You're welcome.)
10. Omelets
Now before you freak out on this one, let me just say that yes, eggs are good for you. They're high in protein, folate, zinc, calcium, and vitamins A, B12, D, and E. They are able to raise the level of high-density lipoprotein (HDL), which is "good cholesterol", in your system. The choline that's in eggs can help to build healthy cell membranes. Eggs even contain amino acids that can help to increase your muscle mass. But the reason why I chose to close out with omelets is that sometimes, all of the oil that they're made in, along with the tons of meat and cheese that go inside of them can be like eating a potential heart attack for breakfast!
That's why, first, it's so important to select the best kind of eggs—either pastured ones from a local farmer or Omega-3s, DHAs, or organic ones from your local grocery store (you can read why here). As far as making omelets go, try and put more veggies than meat (and cheese), prepare them in healthy fat like olive, coconut, and mustard oil, and use more cumin and paprika than salt (salt is high in sodium). If you follow these simple tips, you'll be able to enjoy your omelets, knowing that they truly are giving you what you need in order to have a great day.
Featured image by Shutterstock
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
This Couple Almost Let Their 8-Year Age Gap Keep Them From Finding Love With One Another
How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.
I’m willing to bet that this is not the first time you’ve seen this couple. Dalen Spratt is a television producer, owner of a tailored men's suit line, and creator of Ghost Brothers: Haunted Houseguests, which is currently streaming on Destination America. Stacey Spratt is also a serial entrepreneur, focusing mostly on events and the nonprofit world, and she is the owner of two award-winning craft beer bars called Harlem Hops. But their accolades are not what united them.
The couple met years ago at their alma mater, Clark Atlanta University, when they were still working to create the life they have now, and if you had told them then that they’d eventually tie the knot, the pair probably would’ve laughed in your face.
Today, they’re new parents, flourishing in their careers, and each others’ “teammates.” When desiring love, Dalen recommends not looking to other couples for advice. And Stacey advises staying true to what you want. “Don’t put age or limitations on love and children. If God could do it for me, why can’t he do it for you?”
Here's How We Met.
How did you meet?
Dalen: We met in 2005 when she was advising the Greek sororities and fraternities in college. She was old as hell in college, and I was a young buck (laughs). Everybody had a crush on her, but I didn’t think much of it. Then, in 2007, we were in the same grad school class, but she still wasn’t trying to see me then either. I had to catch her five years ago; I was very patient.
Stacey: Yeah, everybody in our grad school class called him Young, Fresh to Death because he was always dressed in B-school (what CAU affectionately refers to as business major classes), and we’d just wear sweatpants (laughs).
So, I know Dalen was always attracted to you. But what about you? Did your attraction to him develop over time?
Stacey: So 2006-2008 – all the years went by. I don’t think we were really thinking about each other at all back then. Years later, I had an event in Dallas, and I booked him to be a speaker. Then, a few years ago, Dalen posted a photo of him on Instagram, and I slid in his DMs. I remembered him being so young and handsome, and I’m like, I should hook him up with my younger cousin. His response was: "If you’re not hooking me up with you, no thank you." But I still thought he was too young at the time, and he started pulling receipts. Taraji P. Henson was dating someone young at the time, Gabrielle Union–
Dalen: First of all, I didn’t do that. You did that.
Stacey: Okay, I did. I thought he was a cutie pie, but that age thing was on my mind!
"Dalen posted a photo of him on Instagram, and I slid in his DMs. I remembered him being so young and handsome, and I’m like, I should hook him up with my younger cousin. His response was: 'If you’re not hooking me up with you, no thank you.'"
Courtesy
Talk to me about the first date. How did he change your mind?
Stacey: Our first date was at Tin Lizzy's in Atlanta. During that time, he was living in Dallas, so it was long-distance. But he came into town, and we just had a good time. We talked a lot, which we still do. It wasn’t anything fantastic.
Dalen: Don’t downplay our first date.
Then, walk me through your courtship. How did you get to the next level? What was that conversation like?
Stacey: I think he knew at age 43 or 44 I wasn’t playing around. But also, I think it just naturally progressed.
Dalen: Yeah, it just happened naturally. And I’m going to be honest, I don’t think initially either one of us thought it would be as serious as it was. She thought I was too young and I wasn’t ready for marriage, kids, and all that. I think we both thought we were just hanging out. But after spending so much time together, a lot of stuff started happening. Like, she had to have surgery early on. It wasn’t just time together; it was intimate time. Next thing we know, we just never left each other. That’s why we still don’t have an anniversary date because we never really asked.
"It wasn't just time together; it was intimate time. Next thing we know, we just never left each other. That's why we still don't have an anniversary date because we never really asked."
What made you want to commit to each other?
Dalen: The moment I knew Stacey was for me was from a phone call. I don’t really like talking on the phone, and I can be really blunt sometimes. But we were talking, and I said, ‘I don’t really feel like talking anymore.’ And she was just like, okay, and hung up. I wasn’t trying to be rude, and she understood that. It sounds bad, but that’s how I knew she just got me. I felt like she could get my random awkward moments, and she does to this day.
Stacey: For me, I liked him as a person. Even when times get rough and tough, I could still like him as a human. He is my best friend. We have time. We laugh until we cry, and it’s just always like that. Even when we get pissed at each other, something happens, and we fix it. Also, how he treats his mother. That’s a momma’s boy, but I’m a daddy’s girl – so I get it. I know how I want to be treated, and I see how he is with her and that’s beautiful.
What are some important lessons you’ve learned about yourself through loving your partner in this relationship?
Dalen: I grew up an only child and she grew up with siblings. So, when you have someone who is used to doing things by themselves, there is definitely a learning curve when you get into a serious relationship. It’s funny now, but it was definitely a process.
Stacey: I agree – definitely the only child thing. There’s times I look at him like, did you ever live with anyone else? That comes from being momma's baby, too. I have to say, my “mother-in-love” spoiled him. But also with Axel (their daughter), that brings another level of patience.
Photo by Paras Griffin/Getty Images
What was the biggest challenge that you had to overcome together?
Dalen: We’ve gone through a lot within the years we’ve been together. We suffered two miscarriages – I’d say that’s the biggest.
Stacey: Having those miscarriages and trying to understand what’s next and what our options are was a lot. I had two myomectomies (fibroid surgeries), and he supported me through that time. Also, still, it was on my mind that he’s eight years younger than me. I was wondering if I can’t carry [a child] what that looks like for us. We had very real conversations pretty early in our relationship.
"Having those miscarriages and trying to understand what’s next and what our options are was a lot. I had two myomectomies (fibroid surgeries), and he supported me through that time. Also, still, it was on my mind that he’s eight years younger than me."
What do you fight the most about?
Dalen: Nagging. Stacey nags; she’s a complainer. She’s that momma that will look in a room and just hunt for something to complain about. Like, I’m worried for Axel when she's in high school.
Stacey: It’s because I like things to be in place. He leaves stuff all over the place. I can tell where he’s been in the house because something is left around. So he says I’m nagging – but it’s like, just get your stuff.
What are your love languages?
Dalen: Stacey is gifts all day.
Stacey: *thinks*
Dalen: We’ve talked about this. xoNecole is about to cause problems in our home (laughs).
Stacey: Obviously I love you. *thinks again* It’s words of affirmation.
Dalen: That’s it.
What’s your favorite thing about each other?
Dalen: I’ve always respected her business-mindedness. That may sound superficial, but it’s not because I’ve never been with someone who thinks like me. It’s one of my most treasured things about her. I remember one day, I was just running through ideas with her, and each time Stacey had a suggestion on how I could make it better. It’s just very comforting. She takes whatever I’m doing and elevates it – including me.
Stacey: I love Dalen’s hustle and creativity. He’s been on multiple shows, and he continues to create, produce, and reinvent himself and the product he’s putting out. I love that we can create together and bounce things off each other. Even though we may be in different arenas, there’s nothing he can’t offer me great advice about. I love that drive.
Finally, how did you know it was love?
Dalen: Well – she said it – first. (laughs)
Stacey: And he looked at me and smiled! He didn’t say it back. We were on a trip, out of the country.
Dalen: We were arguing when she said it, and she just threw it out.
Stacey: But we continue to do that. We’ve spent holidays and everything outside of the country.
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Oh, the infamous man-child. Some of us have had the pain of encountering a man who has the mental and emotional maturity of a petulant child. I know I have. Between the weaponized incompetence, arrested development, lack of self-awareness, lack of impulse control, and lack of introspection that tend to come with this type of partner, the jokes can write themselves in the pursuit of a relationship with an evolved man who can actually meet you at your level.
As women, we are encouraged to keep our standards high, which ordinarily allows the man-child to stay in the wild where he belongs. Even though the current state of our dating pool is not giving what it needs to give all the way through here, standards and boundaries have long served as effective tools in weeding through the “potential” and showing suitors the door if they aren’t on our level.
But let’s be real; sometimes, an unworthy partner can fall through the cracks as their “representative” takes the lead during the courtship stage. Months and sometimes years later, you might not even realize the full breadth of what you’re dealing with until the proverbial mask begins to slip. Instead of being a help, he’s more of a hindrance. Instead of being an equal, he’s more of a dependent. And instead of being invested in the commitment of a relationship, he’s more into indulging in laziness and low-effort tendencies.
In essence, a man child, also commonly referred to as Peter Pan Syndrome, is a man who is stunted (read: emotionally immature) and refuses to grow up. Instead of feeling like you have a partner, you end up falling into the role of a second mama, and who wants that?
Be prepared to run, not walk, if any of the following signs apply to your guy.
1.They lack purpose and/or direction.
Who was it that said a man with no direction can’t lead you anywhere? Whoever said it deserves credit for doing the Lord’s work and then some. Purpose is how you know fulfillment. Direction sets the tone for the path you are taking in life. Without either or both, you can find yourself squarely in a dead-end relationship with a man who isn’t capable of leading the relationship. More than that, being directionless can manifest in other detrimental ways to the way he leads his own life. This can look like not having routines, procrastinating like a mutha, or even avoiding self-work or self-improvement.
The man-child is just going with the flow and taking one day at a time. While being present is always a gift, the man you’re with shouldn’t be afraid of setting long-term goals so that his present can inform his future.
2.They become paralyzed at the sound of a commitment.
“What is marriage? It’s just a piece of paper. Why do we need to move in together? Everything is going fine just the way it is.”
Being strung along is too common when engaging with a man-child. Common relationship steps considered to be pivotal in moving the relationship forward are things they wince at or things that they just act very indifferent about. It’s not an act, it’s a refusal to commit to the commitment, a paradoxical reality the man-child can write the book about. It’s why questions of moving in together or marriage are things Mr. Go With the Flow can see himself doing without.
A reluctance to truly commit could also be why the relationship might feel like it’s not on solid ground. He prefers to run instead of resolve and sometimes waivers under the weight of what should be viewed as a simple mistake. And if you don’t want to feel stuck in a loop of are we or aren’t we, or worse, plateaued forever, you might be better off letting the runner be the track star he so aspires to be.
3.They rarely (if ever) take initiative in big things and small things.
Whew, chile, can’t you just feel the brunt of emotional labor brimming from this one? Whether it’s meal planning for groceries during the week or even planning dates and trips, hell, even your own birthday – everything seems to fall squarely on your shoulders to get done. More than that, you know if you didn’t take care of it, it wouldn’t get done. A relationship is not a one-person effort, so there is no reason why you can see that things around the house need to get done or things in the relationship need to be maintained, but your partner cannot.
Newsflash: they are okay with being willfully ignorant and might even be serving you a side of weaponized incompetence on purpose.
A healthy partner is willing to look at your mental and emotional well-being and take the initiative to take things off your plate, not burden you with the task of upkeeping most if not all, of the expectations of a household. Let alone a thriving relationship.
4.They always have an excuse.
Couldn’t wash the dishes or clean the bathroom today? Excuse. Couldn’t communicate they’d be running late? Excuse. Couldn’t pick up the kids on time? Excuse. Couldn’t create a meaningful idea for his turn to do date night? Excuse. Couldn’t get groceries done this time but wants to eat? Excuse. Couldn’t be bothered to cook tonight? Excuse. Any behavior deemed bad or unreasonable that they have done? Of course, an excuse. Whatever the instance may be, the ownership is severely lacking with this one, and the blame is always on someone or something else that will rarely (if ever) have anything to do with them.
There’s even an excuse about why past relationships didn’t work out, and surprise, surprise, their exes are almost always the cause. Early on, the blame game with his excuses applies to everything and everyone outside of them. Just know, eventually, he’ll also blame you. Speaking of which, this brings me to my next point…
5.They can’t take accountability if their life depends on it.
Maybe he shuts down when you bring up anything remotely serious or shrugs it off as not being able to do “negative emotions.” Maybe he downright denies it when you mention something he has said or done is hurtful to you. Maybe he acts defensive or doesn’t allow you to take up space in the conversation and instantly dishes out a rebuttal. Something he did is not acceptable under the light of accountability, and so it becomes about what you did to him. You’re being “too sensitive,” that’s not what he meant, you’re “overthinking.”
Maybe all of this points to the man-child you’re clearly dealing with is one that refuses to take responsibility for his actions or his words when it comes to you. He deflects instead of owning, whether it’s his bad behavior or his own emotions. Who wants that?
6.They have standards that they can’t or won’t meet themselves.
It starts with a comment or two here or there while you’re out and about, but they make it known how high their standards are regarding cleanliness or upkeep. But let them get into a relationship with you, and the unsolicited criticisms about how you are and how you move are never-ending. It can start with something seemingly small, like commenting on your cooking despite not ever lifting a finger to cook a meal themselves. The complaints themselves are self-serving because while they attach a lot of expectations to you, they never have any intention of meeting their own strict morals or high standards.
Said man-child might also appear withdrawn or “pout” when things aren’t happening “his way.” It’s almost as though they want you to fit squarely into what they believe a partner should be, say, or do, all while knowing they have no desire to also meet those standards.
Honorable mention to the version of these types that are able to dish it but can’t take it and lash out whenever they feel remotely offended. Pot, meet kettle.
7.They are still attached to the teet.
Sometimes, the makings of a man-child and a mama’s boy do overlap, and honestly, when you think of the refusal to grow up or be responsible in both types, you can probably understand why. In the case of a man-child, this can also manifest as relying on his mom to cook his meals and do his laundry, or calling her for every little thing.
It could also look like wanting to be the center of attention at all times and questioning why he is not the focus when he wants you both to do something he wants to do. Mr. Man-Child is used to being doted after by his mother figure, and wants you to fill her shoes, and wants you to be just as self-sacrificing as she is/was while doing it.
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