
If there's one thing that a lot of people can say has been a side effect of 2020, it's sleeplessness. Between the pandemic, working from home, always having the kids around and, let's be honest, trying not to panic over all of the above, striving to get quality rest has been a real challenge. Understandably so.
As I was recently recommending some healthy sleep tips to someone I know, I happened upon an all-natural sleepy time lotion that some of you might want to try (click here for the recipe). Yet as I thought about all of the things that we can externally do to make resting better, my mind then wandered over to things that we can do from the inside out too.
In walks, food. While it's always a good idea to have your last meal around 2 ½ hours before calling it a night (because your body can digest your meals and reduce heartburn and insomnia that way), there are certain foods that can play a direct role in you getting some quality zzz's each and every evening. So, if you've tried just about everything and have still found yourself tossing and turning for hours on end, check out the 10 foods that very well could bring an end to all of that.
1. Bananas
Let's start off with bananas, shall we? This is the kind of fruit that I have a pretty fickle relationship with because they have to be a perfect kind of ripe, with absolutely no bruises, in order for me to truly enjoy one. Anyway, if bananas are something that you eat on the regular, you are doing your body a favor on a few levels. That's because bananas contain a good amount of fiber, manganese, antioxidants, magnesium, potassium, protein, and Vitamin B6. Bananas also can help to keep your blood sugar levels intact, improve the health of your heart, help to keep your kidneys strong and can also help to relieve the discomfort of exercise-related muscle cramps (thanks to the potassium that's in them).
The reason why it's a good idea to snack on one or even make yourself a homemade banana smoothie a couple of hours before turning in is that, for one thing, the magnesium and potassium combo creates a wonderful way for your nerves and muscles to relax. Also, bananas have the amino acid tryptophan in them which makes it easier to feel calm and peaceful—sleepy even.
Banana Sleep Hack: Banana Tea Recipe
2. Kale
As far as dark leafy greens go, while I personally prefer collards over kale, I'll enjoy a kale salad or some homemade kale chips, every now and again because I know how good they are for me. Kale is considered to be one of the most nutrient-dense foods on the planet. What that means is it's got such a high amount of vitamins and minerals that you can receive a ton of what you need daily, nutrition-wise, just by consuming kale alone. For instance, did you know that kale contains almost 700 percent of Vitamin K, a little over 200 percent of the Vitamin A, and around 130 percent of the Vitamin C daily value that your system requires? Also, kale is high in fiber to keep you regular, antioxidants that fight off free radicals, and compounds that help to prevent cancer cells from forming too.
Since kale also has a fair amount of magnesium, potassium, and calcium, and since all of these are nerve relaxers, that's why kale gets a shout-out for being another food that can make going to sleep easier to do.
Kale Sleep Hack: Vegetarian Kale Soup Recipe3. Cantaloupe
If you are a melon fan, you're always looking out for your health if you're eating cantaloupe. It's loaded with antioxidants, Vitamin C, folate, beta-carotene (a form of Vitamin A), fiber, and potassium. Since it's also made up of 90 percent water, cantaloupe is a bona fide way to help to prevent dehydration. Some other health benefits include it being the kind of fruit that improves heart and eye health as well as improving your digestion.
Now check it. Did you know that dehydration can actually play a role in us not being able to fall or stay asleep? The backstory is that when we don't have enough fluid in our system, it can make our mouth and nasal drier which can result in sleep-disruptive snoring. Also, the antioxidants that are in this particular melon are actually proven to promote a better night's rest as well.
Cantaloupe Sleep Hack: Cantaloupe Sorbet Recipe
4. Nuts
No matter what kind of nuts you prefer, they are a good thing for you to snack on. Nuts are a great source of protein, healthy fats, fiber, selenium, manganese, magnesium, omega-3 fatty acids, phosphorus, and Vitamin E, as well as antioxidants. That alone helps to explain why you should chomp on a few, a couple of times a week. Nuts are also awesome when it comes to lowering cholesterol, reducing bodily inflammation, reducing your risk of experiencing a heart attack or stroke, improving the lining of your arteries, and helping you to feel full if you're trying to lose weight.
Aside from the magnesium in nuts, something else that makes them a cool sleep aid is the fact that they've got melatonin in them too. That's a hormone that helps to induce sleep while also regulating your internal clock so that your body gets sleepy on somewhat of a schedule. So, if you're someone who has trouble falling asleep every night, you might want to have a handful of nuts about three hours before bedtime. It could help to lull you to sleep quicker (almonds have a good amount of melatonin in them, by the way).
Nut Sleep Hack: Almond Butter Recipe
5. Tart Cherry Juice
I dig cherries anyway, so it was super easy to make the transition over to tart cherry juice when I found out that it was a great way to get my body to feel calmer and more relaxed. Anyway, as far as its health benefits go, tart cherry juice (which is the kind of juice that is made from Montmorency cherries) is a solid source of fiber, protein, and vitamins A and C while also having a good amount of manganese, potassium, and copper in it too. The reason why tart cherry juice is a smart juice to add to your diet overall is that it can also help to reduce muscle soreness after working out, lessen arthritic and gout-related discomfort, promote brain health (thanks to its antioxidants and plant compounds), strengthen your immune system and lower your blood pressure as well.
Drinking a cold or even warmed-up cup of tart cherry juice is a fabulous sleep agent because it's rich in melatonin, tryptophan, and also anthocyanins (water-soluble pigments that give cherries their red color). The cool thing about anthocyanins is they can help your body to create even more melatonin while lengthening the amount of time that it remains in your system. Just make sure that it's 100 percent tart cherry juice. The cocktail stuff is loaded with sugar and since sugar is a stimulant, I'm pretty sure you can see how drinking it would be counterproductive like a mug.
Tart Cherry Juice Sleep Hack: Tart Cherry Sleepytime Elixir
6. Eggs
A food that is basically a multivitamin in each serving is eggs. They are super high in protein, they've got a good amount of vitamins A, B, D, E, zinc, folate, selenium, calcium, and zinc, and they are considered to be a "healthy fat" that can help to lower your cholesterol levels. Eggs also contain choline that can help to build healthy cell membranes, antioxidants that can improve your vision, and amino acids that can increase muscle mass and make your bones stronger.
And what will eating a hard-boiled egg or omelet in the evening do for you? Well, the white of an egg helps your body to produce more melatonin. Also, one of the amino acids that eggs have in them is tryptophan and well, you already know what that does.
Egg Sleep Hack: A Bedtime Beverage (with egg yolks, carob powder, maple syrup and more)
7. Hummus
As far as dips go, hummus is pretty cool. If you've ever wondered exactly what hummus is, it's a Middle Eastern dish that is made up of chickpeas, sesame seeds, olive oil, lemon juice, and garlic powder. A lot of vegetarians and vegans adore it because it's pretty off-the-charts when it comes to how much protein it contains. Plus, hummus is full of fiber, manganese, copper, folate, magnesium, iron, and zinc. All of these nutrients work together to help to fight body inflammation, keep your gut in good condition (since 80 percent of our immune system is in our gut, that's definitely a good thing), lower your blood sugar levels, reduce your risk for heart disease and also, since it's gluten, dairy and nut-free, if you've got a sensitivity to any of those things, you can enjoy hummus with absolutely no worries.
If you've ever had hummus and then found yourself yawning 30 minutes later, that's not a mere coincidence. Hummus is another food that has tryptophan in it and, thanks to the traces of Vitamin B6 that it also contains, eating it before turning in can help to regulate your internal clock so that your body is better able to maintain some sort of sleep schedule.
Hummus Sleep Hack: Easy Hummus Recipe
8. Honey
For as long as I live, I doubt I will ever get over how something as sweet as honey can be as good for our overall health and well-being too (plus, it never expires, did you know that?). Honey is really good for you because it's full of antioxidants and antibacterial and antifungal properties; ones that can help to lower your blood pressure, improve your cholesterol levels, suppress coughs (especially in children), clear up congestion, and can even help wounds and pimples to heal at a much faster rate.
The really cool thing about honey, sleep-wise, is that aside from the fact that honey helps melatonin to get to your brain at a faster pace, what I also learned a few years back, is honey also provides your brain with enough fuel to actually stay asleep. How? Well, about a teaspoon of honey before bedtime gives your liver enough energy to produce the glycogen (a form of glucose) that you need for the insulin levels in your body to raise enough for tryptophan to release from your brain and produce serotonin—a natural chemical that stabilizes your mood and helps to relax you. So yeah, if you've been feeling restless, a little bit of honey sweetness may be the solution to all of your sleep-related worries.
Honey Sleep Hack: Honey Butter Recipe9. Grapes
Something that I like to snack on throughout the day is grapes (frozen ones are especially bomb!). Believe it or not, grapes actually have their fair share of protein in them. They also have an impressive amount of vitamins A and K, copper, and fiber too. Plus, the antioxidants in grapes can help to prevent chronic diseases, their plant compounds can fight off certain cancer cells, the potassium in grapes can help to lower your blood pressure and cholesterol levels, and they also contain properties that can improve both your moods as well as your memory.
Since grapes are another fruit that is full of water (approximately 82 percent), that's one reason why they make the "help you to sleep" list. Yet, what really makes them dope is they contain melatonin and again, since that's a sleep-regulating hormone, well—how could you go wrong by snacking on a handful of grapes at bedtime?
Grape Sleep Hack: Grape Salsa Recipe10. Whole Grains
Whole oats. Whole wheat. Buckwheat. Millet. Quinoa. Brown rice. Popcorn. These are just a handful of examples of what's considered to be whole-grain food. So, if you're someone who likes to have a heaping bowl of oatmeal in the morning or to snack on popcorn while watching television, you're actually doing yourself a world of good. That's because whole grains contain the entire grain kernel—the bran, endosperm, and germ—so that you're able to gain all of the nutrients from the grain before it's been processed. This means that you're able to partake of a high amount of fiber, protein, antioxidants, plant compounds, zinc, iron, magnesium, manganese, and B vitamins that your body needs in order to maintain optimal health. Also, whole grains help to lower your risk of heart disease, stroke, and obesity.
The main thing that makes whole grains stellar in the help-you-to-sleep department is the magnesium that's in them. As it calms your nerves and muscles, it can also bind to your gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) receptors, so that you're able to remain in your sleep cycle without any disruption. How scientifically outstanding is that?
Whole Grain Hack: You can get 50 different recipes to create your favorite popcorn flavor here. Enjoy and sweet dreams, sis.
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This Is How To Keep 'Holiday Season Stress' From Infecting Your Relationship
Hmph. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like there is something really weird happening in the fall season air (because winter doesn’t officially begin until December 21) that cuddle season is in full swing while break-up season is as well. In fact, did you know that break-ups are so popular during the holiday season that December 11 is deemed Break-Up Day?
The reasons why relationships shift around this time vary; however, I did both roll my eyes and chuckle when I read that a very popular one is because it’s an easy way to get out of getting one’s significant other a Christmas present. SMDH.
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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It’s probably been over the past 2-3 years that I’ve become hyper-focused when it comes to applying certain chemical exfoliants known as acids to my skin. Personally, I’ve come to really appreciate ones like mandelic acid and hyaluronic acid because they have a way of softening my skin, brightening it up and really evening out my complexion overall.
In fact, on my skin, they have been so effective that they have caused me to wonder what would happen if I applied some of them to my hair too — and boy, was it an experiment that paid off big time!
If, while on your continual journey to get the best out of your own tresses, you’d like to learn how to get them healthier than it’s ever been, I’ve got seven acids that are typically known for skin use that can be just as beneficial to your hair as well.
1. Salicylic Acid
When it comes to your skin, salicylic acid is beta-hydroxy acid that is great for your skin if you’re looking for something that will exfoliate it, clear out your pores and dissolve dead skin cells. In fact, this is why it’s an acid that is quite popular when it comes to treating acne.
Your hair will enjoy salicylic acid because, if you’re looking to remove product build-up, you want to soothe an itchy or irritated scalp or you’ve got some dandruff flakes that are totally driving you up the wall, salicylic acid has the ability to treat all of this. Either purchasing a shampoo that contains this ingredient or adding it to your favorite scalp scrub is probably the most effective way to get the most out of it.
Just make sure that if your scalp is sensitive or dry that you approach with caution. In these instances, it could end up irritating your scalp more than helping it out, so use a very little bit in the beginning to make sure that it vibes with you.
2. Lactic Acid
Lactic acid is an alpha hydroxy acid that can help to even out your skin tone as well as slow down the signs of aging. The properties in it help to do this by reducing hyperpigmentation and boosting collagen production in your skin as well as keeping it hydrated.
Why is it great for your locks? For one thing, lactic acid is considered to be a humectant. This means that it pulls water from the air so that your hair is able to remain moisturized.
Another thing that makes it a winner is the fact that lactic acid breaks down dead skin cells on your scalp (so that your hair follicles are able to flourish), it can help to soften and detangle your hair (making it a helpful addition on your wash days) and it also helps to protect your tresses from heat styling tools and UV damage. Applying a hair rinse that’s made up of part lactic acid and part water can work wonderfully (so long as you apply it once a month, tops; more than that might be too “intense” for your hair strands).
3. Glycolic Acid
Glycolic acid is a water-soluble alpha hydroxy acid that is actually made from sugar. Your skin will adore it because it smooths the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, improves the texture of your skin, gently exfoliates, clears your pores and brightens up your complexion overall.
The reasons why you should consider this acid for your hair is because it helps to keep your scalp youthful (and yes, there is such a thing; check out “Your Scalp Ages Six Times Faster Than Your Face. Why It Matters.”), removes excess sebum (that could be clogging up your hair follicles) and it helps to keep your hair moisturized. Your best bet here is to make it a part of your pre-shampooing ritual.
4. Succinic Acid
Succinic acid is an acid that is made from sugar cane and contains antimicrobial and anti-inflammatory properties. Although it doesn’t exactly exfoliate (like many of these other acids do), it can still be beneficial to your skin when it comes to reducing the kind of irritation that is associated with eczema, decreasing the bacteria that leads to breakouts and keeping your skin pretty hydrated.
As far as your hair goes, this is an acid that is worth trying out because it helps to balance the sebum that is on your scalp, remove dead skin and product build-up that can irritate your scalp and clog your hair follicles and, succinic acid is also beneficial when it comes to reducing dandruff and helping to prevent hair loss. Most people tend to apply this as a serum.
5. Hyaluronic Acid
I’ve officially sung the praises of hyaluronic acid on this platform before. One example is via the article, “Why Your Skin, Hair, And Nails Need Hyaluronic Acid Like...Yesterday.” On the skin tip, hyaluronic acid is great because it deeply hydrates your skin, contains anti-aging properties and can even bring relief to vaginal (including vulvar) dryness.
Your hair will adore this particular acid because it aids moisture to it (including your hair follicles), will help to improve your hair’s texture and it also soothes scalp dryness, nurtures the cuticles of your tresses and decreases frizz. Using a serum rich in this acid as a pre-poo or as a leave-in conditioner is recommended.
6. Azelaic Acid
If you’ve never heard of azelaic acid before, this is your lucky day. It’s a dicarboxylic acid that, when it comes to skincare (and hair care) products, is usually synthetic. Anyway, if you are looking for a way to reduce inflammation, even skin tone after a breakout or if you want to use an exfoliant that will improve the texture of your skin overtime, you might want to give this acid a shot.
This one makes the list as far as your hair is concerned because, if achieving more inches is your current focus, azelaic acid might come in handy. That’s because it is able to strengthen your hair, thicken your strands and also stimulate hair growth from within your hair follicles.
7. Glutamic Acid
Glutamic acid is actually a type of amino acid. Skin-wise, it’s great for deeply hydrating your skin as well as protecting it from pollutants and damaging UV rays. Also, if you’re looking for an acid that treats skin dryness or “tightness,” this could be the answer to your prayers.
Since glutamic acid is also considered to be a humectant, it’s another acid that can moisturize your hair. As a result, it can decrease breakage while helping your hair to feel smooth and look shiny.
BONUS: Amino Acids
Speaking of amino acids and hair, please try to keep some amino acids in your diet at all times. The reason why is because, since your hair is made up of mostly protein (keratin, to be exact), amino acids are pretty darn effective when it comes to helping you to maintain the overall health and well-being of your hair.
Ones to prioritize include proline (it boosts collagen so that your hair strands can maintain flexibility); arginine (it increases blood flow to your hair follicles so that they can receive the nutrients that they need); cysteine (it helps to keep your hair follicles healthy); alanine (it helps your system to produce more collagen), and isoleucine (it strengthens the tissues that help to make up your hair strands). All of these are available in supplement form or you can use Google to see which foods contain them.
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Although it might initially seem odd to apply acid to your hair, as you can see, certain ones will work miracles for it. So, test them out to see which one tickles your fancy.
Hell, since they work for your skin as well — it’s a two-for-one deal that is worth every penny!
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