Since my "big chop" in early 2018, I've fully committed to wearing natural hairstyles as a way to maintain healthy hair. As a self-proclaimed naturalista, wearing protective styles have been a great alternative to my wash-and-go routine, allowing my hair to remain tucked away while minimizing manipulation and breakage.
Rotating hairstyles such as braids, wigs, and twists gives my hair a break from nasty seasonal weather conditions while also allowing me to save so much time from not styling each and every morning. Although my intentions of wearing protective styles to save my hair from damage are effective, wearing these styles alone isn't enough to ensure that I'm reaping 100 percent of the benefits.
As a Black woman with tight coils, I was never taught how to take care of my natural hair, let alone how to keep my scalp happy while living an active lifestyle. Now that I am older and have more responsibilities, including a weekly workout routine, it's even more important to have the right products that assist in the protection of my hair and scalp while not solely relying on protective styles to give me healthy hair results that I desire.
Maintaining Your Natural Hair While Working Out
As an active naturalista, it's even more vital that I protect my strands, cleansing my hair of sweat that damages my scalp, especially with gym closures, and working out regularly outdoors. To combat the damage from outdoor elements, I took it upon myself to find the best products that will not only nurture my strands but are created by women who know and understand the natural hair struggle.
While it's easy to protect our hair in the spirit of hair growth, according to Natalya Moosa of Afrocenchix, "Prepping your hair in anticipation of wearing a protective style is key in your hair routine. This starts with ensuring the hair is clean and free of any prior product buildup which otherwise could lead to breakage."
As a general rule, we should begin any and every protective hairstyle with freshly cleansed and moisturized hair but it's maintaining that clean and healthy hair underneath that adds to the benefit of each style, meaning daily and weekly care is still required especially when working out.
Sunday II Sunday Haircare
Shahirah Ahmed for xoNecole
While there are so many products in the "Ethnic Hair Care" section at my local Target claiming to relieve that annoyingly severe dry itchy scalp when my hair is in braids, I've never stumbled upon products that are effective, lasting throughout the day. To combat my post-gym hair and calm my itchy scalp, I decided to try Sunday II Sunday's Moisture Balance Kit for the first time, and what a great decision it was.
Known as the athleisure of haircare, this black-owned company has created a wide range of products to benefit the active woman by removing excess sweat and restoring the moisture our hair so desperately needs.
The Moisture Balance Kit is the ultimate collection created to protect hair against unwanted moisture such as sweat while relieving uncomfortable itch, transforming the scalp within minutes. The kit attests to a fully transformed scalp guaranteed within 28 days of use for all hair types. Even for those less active, this is a great kit for all of us struggling to control the irritating scalp itch that is so common when wearing protective hairstyles.
Sunday II Sunday Review: The Moisture Balance Kit
Shahirah Ahmed for xoNecole
Sunday II Sunday Root Refresh Micellar Rinse Review
I've never experienced instant long-lasting relief until using the ROOT REFRESH Micellar Rinse infused with apple cider vinegar and micellar water. The dry shampoo replacement is a lightweight cleansing breakthrough product that revives, renews, and refreshes your hair and scalp. It's perfect in between wash days with no shower required. I love using this spray after a workout as well as a cleansing spray every other day to refresh my scalp.
With an amazing smell described as "fresh crisp apples", my review of the Root Refresh Micellar Rinse is that the apple cider vinegar is not overpowering and offers a perfect balance to cleanse while providing a fresh scent, removing unwanted odors from outside elements.
Sunday II Sunday Revive Me Daily Moisturizing Spray
Along with the Root Refresh Rinse, the addition of the Revive Me Daily Moisturizing Spray is absolutely necessary to combat dry itchy scalp. This award-winning lightweight moisturizing mist calmed my hair and revived my scalp adding shine and nourishment. I instantly felt relief using this product directly after the Root Refresh Rinse.
I use this spray once a day in the morning after showering or at night throughout the week. This product can also be used to refresh curls and is a universal moisturizing spray perfect for any natural hairstyle.
Courtesy of Sunday II Sunday
Sunday II Sunday Soothe Me Daily Scalp Serum Review
One-fourth of the moisturizing kit, Soothe Me Daily Scalp Serum is everything I've ever needed in my life when it comes to scalp relief. I'm convinced the addition of this serum is what locks in the moisturizer needed to cool and soothe my inflamed scalp. As a wig-wearer, the itch can feel uncontrollable however this extremely lightweight yet effective cooling serum is infused with peppermint oil relieving my dry scalp within minutes when paired with the Revive Me Spray and Root Refresh.
Used in the morning or at night, pre-or post-workout, as a daily refresher or to calm dry scalp due to protective styles, this is a must-have serum for women looking for a product that actually works to relieve itch all day long.
Sunday II Sunday Edge Flourish Daily Nourishing Serum
Last but certainly not least, EDGE FLOURISH Daily Nourishing Serum, is the perfect serum to bring my edges back to life. With sensitive skin, I'm always skeptical of products that are for my edges because it's used so close to my face and I fear breakouts but this edge serum is lightweight with the perfect consistency that doesn't feel too heavy or clogs the pores. With natural ingredients and a silicone-free formula, this serum consists of biotin, coconut oil, sunflower seed oil, and safflower seed oil to deliver healthier and stronger edges.
It's suggested to apply directly to your edges and nape, gently massaging the serum into your edges with your fingertips to nourish and protect before and after styling. When in need of a serum to repair damaged edges that are sometimes caused by our protective hairstyles, my review of this product is that the formula completely nourishes, moisturizes, refreshes, and renews to help keep your edges fully intact.
Overall, the Sunday II Sunday Moisturizing Kit is complete with everything you need for daily haircare.
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Featured image by Shahirah Ahmed for xoNecole
Originally published on December 18, 2020
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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