There are very few things in this life that I adore more than my bed — and I’m not kidding. I actually picked out bedding and decor that would make my bedroom one of my absolute favorite places to be. Hell, even my friends will tell you that I’m good for saying that my bedroom space is like a Six Flags experience for me.
At the same time, what’s kind of weird about all of this is, my chronotype (more on that in just a sec) actually says that I’m most productive in the early morning hours which means that, for better or for worse, I’ve had to condition myself to be more of a morning person than my bed and I would like.
There are some proven perks to making the shift. Aside from the fact that early rising makes it possible to have more time to get more things done in a 24-hour day, there are also studies to support that being a morning person is better for your mental health, helps to lower depression-related symptoms, can make you more energized and productive throughout the day and, some research indicates that it’s better for your overall physical health and well-being too.
For all of these reasons, I thought it would be a good idea to share some tips on how you can become more of a morning person if that’s always been a goal of yours that you happen to struggle with or if you want to try it for a while to see if it truly is a good look. With the help of the following 10 tips/hacks in just a few months (give or take a few weeks), you may find yourself wondering why you weren’t getting up with the sun and the birds years ago.
Unsplash
1. Know Your Why
Something that I enjoy doing is taking personality tests, and one of the most enlightening ones that I’ve taken in a while is a chronotype one (which I talk about in the article, “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”). The general concept is we’re each a bear, wolf, lion, or dolphin. What that means is each animal speaks to the time of day when we are the most productive.
Me? I’m a lion, which means that I tend to get the most done before noon, and so when I was trying to be less of a night owl and more of a morning person during a particular season of my life, my motivation was to get enough rest so that I could get up and get more done during the time when my mind and body actually prefer to.
All of this is why I think that the first thing that you need to consider when it comes to becoming more of a morning person is to figure out why you want to do it. With a clear motive and plan in place that can inspire you to get up an hour (or more) earlier because there is a true mission in mind that can make the sacrifice (by definition, a sacrifice is giving up something good for something greater) easier.
2. Change Your Bedroom’s Window Treatments
I can tell you from personal experience that if you’ve got blackout curtains in your bedroom, it’s gonna be chal-leng-ing to try and get up in the morning, no matter how bright it may be outside. That’s because those types of window treatments are designed to keep natural light out.
That’s why, if you truly want to become more of a morning person, another thing that you should do is go with sheer curtains or opened blinds; that way, your body can start to wake up as the sun rises. As a bonus, natural light provides health benefits like a boost of vitamin D, lower stress levels, and a better night’s rest at the end of each day, so it’s kind of a win all the way around.
Unsplash
3. Create a Morning and Nighttime Routine
While checking out a doctor’s blog on the benefits of creating a life routine, some of the things that he shared is it can reduce stress, make you more efficient, and even cause your life to become more meaningful. If you add to this the fact that a routine can create habits that will last for years to come, it makes a lot of sense that it’s wise to have a morning and nighttime routine.
As far as a morning routine goes, it could be that you pray and/or meditate, journal, sip some herbal tea, go through some affirmations, or take a longer shower so that you start your day off feeling truly refreshed. On the flip side, your nighttime routine can consist of things like soaking in the tub, creating a sleep schedule, reading a book, doing some stretches before getting into bed, verbalizing some things that you are grateful for and that you accomplished throughout the day and listening to some soothing music.
The bottom line here is you rob yourself of enjoying getting out of and into bed (plus, you can throw your sleep rhythm off a bit) if you only jerk yourself out of bed in the morning and/or immediately fall asleep due to sheer exhaustion at night. That said, some tips for how to create and customize your own morning and night routine can be found here.
4. Stop Consuming Stimulants Before Bedtime
Especially as I get older, one habit that I definitely need to break is to stop drinking before going to bed. Why? Because I’m the type of person who, even if I run to the bathroom with all of the lights off in the middle of the night, once I’m awake, I’m up for at least an hour — and that can be annoying as all get out when I’m trying to get back to some quality zzz’s in. If you can relate, it really is best to stop drinking about a couple of hours before turning in.
Oh, and if stimulants like alcohol or coffee are your thing, you should go even longer without those. Alcohol needs to be at least three hours prior to your bedtime, and many health experts say that when it comes to caffeine (yes, your beloved coffee), it should be a whopping eight.
Unsplash
5. Prep for the Next Day
If a part of what you hate about getting up early in the morning is feeling rushed, there is definitely a workaround for that. You can easily add 30 minutes to your morning window by preparing for the next day the night before. This can include laying out (and ironing) your clothes, preparing your lunch, checking the best GPS travel route, and putting together your to-do list for the following day.
Just knowing that you’ve got your morning organized before turning in can help you to sleep more soundly and wake up in a more relaxed state of mind.
6. Prioritize Something in the Morning (Every Morning)
A part of the reason why some of us don’t consider ourselves to be morning people is because all we see is a day full of work and other obligations before us, and getting up earlier means that we have to do them sooner —and in comparison to staying all comfy and cozy in our bed, the bed is always going to win. That’s why another hack that could help is to prioritize something that you actually enjoy in the morning.
Maybe it’s watching a morning program, getting coffee and a pastry at a local donut shop, or exercising in the early am so that you can knock it out of the way. If you reward yourself for getting up (earlier), that can make it easier to do.
Unsplash
7. Move Your Bedtime Up (in 15-Minute Increments)
It’s kind of unrealistic to think that you will become a morning person — pardon the pun — overnight. So, one thing that could help you out is to move your bedtime up in 15-minute increments over the next 2-4 weeks or so. In other words, if you typically go to bed at 11 p.m. and you want to start waking up at 5:30 a.m. while still getting no less than seven hours of sleep, this week, go to bed at 10:45 p.m., next week at 10:30 a.m., and so on. That way, changing your sleep schedule won’t feel so drastic, and you’ll be better able to ease into it.
8. Use a Nature Sounds Alarm Setting
Believe it or not, there’s research that indicates that traditional alarm clocks aren’t as beneficial for us as we might think. For one thing, they don’t really “ease” us out of bed; it’s more like they shock us. Plus, just knowing that the sound will go off in the morning can disrupt your sleep patterns. That’s why it’s best to either go with a digital or sunrise alarm or to set your smartphone to make a nature-related sound when it’s time for you to get up (there are also nature sound alarm clocks that you can buy). These options are more soothing to the soul while still being just as effective.
Getty Images
9. Keep a Sleep Schedule (Even on the Weekends)
I once read an article that said a sleep schedule is all about prioritizing this type of rest. Well, since sleep helps to recharge and rejuvenate your system, regulate your blood sugar, boost your immunity, strengthen your cognitive abilities, reduce your stress levels, maintain a healthy weight, give you more energy, and so much more — sleep is definitely something that you should treat as a paramount practice in your life. And yes, if you want to become a morning person, a sleep schedule can help with that, too.
At the end of the day, creating a sleep schedule is all about incorporating a night routine and also making the effort to go to bed at the same time, each and every night, including the weekends (yep, a sleep schedule has no “cheat” days). If you do this consistently enough, your mind and body will treat your sleep schedule like a pattern/habit — then, before you know it, waking up in the morning will be super natural for you.
10. Choose Your Words Wisely
Last one. I once read a blog post on how to become a morning person. One of the things that it said that stood out was that it’s important to “change your story” because if all you seem to focus on — and declare — is that you are not a morning person, it’s going to be so much harder to change that reality.
You know, there is a good deal of science in these streets to back that negative words give us stress and anxiety while positive thoughts and words can literally alter our reality for the better.
So, if you really want to become a morning person, start believing and declaring that you are one — it might be the most powerful hack of all. Enjoy the shifting, sis. Ultimately, it’s worth it.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by andreswd/Getty Images
It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
There’s just something about HBCU Homecoming that just hits different. Whether it’s your first time stepping onto the yard since graduation or you’re a regular at every Homecoming tailgate, HBCU pride is undeniable. It’s a vibrant celebration that unites the legacy of excellence and tradition with the energy and resilience of Black culture.
The experience goes beyond a typical college reunion; HBCU Homecoming is a family reunion, a fashion show, a cultural festival, and a week-long turn-up that embodies what it means to be unapologetically Black and educated. For HBCU alumni, the journey back to the yard each year is rooted in a love and pride that’s hard to put into words but impossible to deny.
From statement pieces to tech must-haves, every item represents the intersection of Black pride and HBCU love, ensuring that you show up to the yard in style and with intention. So whether you’re repping your alma mater for the first time since graduation or looking for fresh pieces to express your HBCU pride, these essentials will have you standing out, because, at HBCU Homecoming, it’s not just about showing up—it’s about showing out.
Thread Goals
diarrablu Jant Pants in Alia Noir
High-waisted, wide-legged, and ready to shut down the yard, the Jant Pants by diarrablu bring a whole new meaning to campus chic. Handcrafted in Dakar, Senegal, these free-flowing jacquard pants are perfect for stepping onto the yard with style and ease—making them a must-have for any HBCU alum’s closet.
Silver & Riley Convertible Executive Leather Bag Classic Size in Olive
This all-in-one luxury bag isn’t a bestseller for nothing. The Silver & Riley essential is made of Italian calfskin leather and thoughtfully designed, as it can be worn in four different ways: a shoulder bag, crossbody, a top handle, and a backpack. Chic and elegant, the Convertible Executive Leather bag is “the bag that every woman needs in her collection.”
Renowned Women's Intuition Cotton Graphic T-Shirt
Renowned
Renowned’s Women’s Intuition Cotton Graphic T-shirt features a bold graphic print inspired by the power and essence of women’s intuition. With its striking design, this all-cotton tee is a vibrant thing, making it a statement piece that celebrates feminine energy.
Mifland Million M Mesh Crop Shirt
Talk about bold, the Million M Mesh Crop Shirt combines edgy style with comfort, featuring Mifland’s signature print on a semi-see-through mesh fabric. Show up and show out in sophisticated flair.
HBCU Love FUBU
Melanin Is Life Melanated & Educated - I Love My HBCU Hoodie
Show off your HBCU love with this piece that represents everything you gained from your alma mater: a top-tier education, a community that lifts you up, and a deep sense of esteem for yourself and your culture. Wear it loud and proud, because being melanated and educated isn’t just a flex—it’s a legacy.
HBCU Culture Spelmanite Sweatshirt in Navy
Spelmanites, rep your Spelman pride with this unisex crewneck sweatshirt, designed for ultimate comfort and a relaxed fit. Made from a cozy cotton/polyester blend, this classic sweatshirt is as durable as it is stylish—making it an ideal piece for any Spelmanite showing love for their alma mater.
HBCU Culture Howard Is The Culture T-Shirt
Rock the ultimate flex by showcasing your Howard U love with HBCU Culture’s Howard Is The Culture t-shirt. This unisex tee offers a comfortable, relaxed fit that’s perfect for celebrating your HBCU spirit without sacrificing style or comfort.
DungeonForward FAMU - Strike Bucket - Reversible
DungeonForward’s Strike Bucket Hat brings versatility and style to the FAMU Crown collection with its reversible design, giving you two looks in one. Featuring a sleek black snakeskin-embossed brim lining and a bold outline Rattler emblem, this hat is all about repping your Rattler pride in style.
DungeonForward Savannah State University - HBCU Hat - TheYard
The Savannah State University HBCU Hat by DungeonForward is more than just a hat—it’s a symbol of Tiger pride and a nod to the culture. Perfect for gamedays, tailgates, or just showing off your HBCU love, this hat lets you carry a piece of the yard wherever you go.
Tech the Halls
Anker iPhone 16 Portable Charger, Nano Power Bank
Stay charged up with the Anker Nano Power Bank, which features dual USB-C ports, a foldable connector, and a compact design, making it perfect for those HBCU tailgates and late-night parties you pull up to.
Drip Check
Wisdom Frame 14 Square Sunglasses
Elevate your look with these angular square-frame sunglasses by Wisdom, bringing an ultramodern edge to any outfit. The sleek design makes them perfect for blocking out the haters while you stunt on the yard.
Coco and Breezy Eyewear Fortune in Gray Turquoise
The Fortune Glasses in Grey Turquoise is a bold statement piece to any Homecoming weekend ‘fit that “embody our fearless and outspoken DNA.” With their color and edgy design, these frames by Coco and Breezy are perfect for anyone looking to stand out and express their unapologetic confidence.
Howard U Lapel Pin
Rep your Bison pride wherever you go with this Howard U Lapel Pin from Pretty AmbVision. Whether adding it to your jacket, shirt, or bag, this pin is the perfect way to showcase your love for your alma mater while rocking your HBCU love with honor and distinction.
Mifland Standard Rucksack Mini
The Standard Rucksack is designed to evolve like that HBCU pride—getting richer, bolder, and better with time. Durable, stylish, and built to last, this Rucksack by Mifland is a timeless piece equipped with versatile carrying options and fully adjustable back straps for ultimate comfort.
Stay Fresh, Stay Blessed
Slip Pure Silk Sleep Mask in Pink
Keeping it cute starts with beauty sleep. This luxurious silk mask is an essential for a reason. If protecting your skin and waking up refreshed is your priority, look no further than this Homecoming essential.
Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier Lemon Lime - Hydration Powder Packets
Stay hydrated and energized throughout Homecoming weekend with this Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier in Lemon Lime. Just add a packet to your water bottle, and bless your body with 2-3 times more hydration than water with every packet. Because staying hydrated is the key to popping up and showing out all weekend long!
Loop Experience Plus Earplugs High Fidelity Hearing Protection
Designed for your hearing protection, these sleek earplugs reduce noise without compromising sound quality—perfect for enjoying the band’s halftime show, late-night parties, and DJ sets. Whether you’re front row at the step show or hitting the yard, your ears deserve to be protected in style!
Black Girl Magic Glass Cup
Sip in style and celebrate your melanin with the Black Girl Magic Glass Cup. Perfect for morning coffee, your favorite iced drink, or showing off your HBCU pride on the yard—this cup is all about keeping it cute while radiating your endless supply of Black Girl Magic.
Glow Up & Show Out
Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30
What Homecoming weekend can be complete without an assist from this beauty find? Formulated to blend seamlessly into melanin-rich skin (no white-cast), protect your glow while you turn up with the Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30.
Sienna Naturals Issa Rae's Wash Day Ritual Set
Issa Rae’s Wash Day Ritual Set from Sienna Naturals includes the H.A.PI. Shampoo, the Plant Power Repair Mask, Dew Magic, and Lock and Seal to get your crown right. Whether you’re repping your coils or rocking a new color on the yard, these products restore and nourish your strands, keeping your hair healthy, strong, and Homecoming-ready!
54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter
Stay glowing from the tailgate to the after-party with the 54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter. Infused with African-sourced ingredients, this rich, multi-purpose butter is the answer to keeping your skin soft and radiant through all the festivities all Homecoming long.
Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil
Keep your lips looking luscious and nourished with the Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil. Perfect for adding an extra pop to your pout before hitting the yard or freshening up between events, this lip oil is a beauty essential for staying camera-ready all weekend.
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image by Visual Vic/Getty Images
Victoria Monét’s Romantic Journey: A Deep Dive Into Her Dating History
Victoria Monét, the multi-talented singer-songwriter known for her sultry vocals and captivating performances, has been making waves not only for her music but also for her openness about her personal life. Best known for hits like "On My Mama" and collaborations with Usher, Monét's career continues to soar as she carves out a space in the R&B and pop landscape.
Alongside her musical success, her dating history has garnered attention, as she has been linked to several high-profile relationships, most notably with personal trainer and entrepreneur John Gaines, with whom she shares a daughter.
When it comes to her sexuality, Monét was hesitant at the beginning of her career to share she identified as bisexual. In an interview with Variety, she said, “I thought that conforming would make me go further. Being picturesque, straight… It almost felt like you didn’t want to add any more weights to your ankles trying to win a race. It’s like, you’re already a woman, you’re already Black — you’d better pick a struggle.”
In November 2018, the artist publicly announced her bisexuality in a post on X (formerly Twitter). This revelation empowered her to express her true self more openly through her music. Notably, in the 2019 duet with Ariana Grande "Monopoly," she sings, "I swerve both ways, dichotomy / I like women and men," boldly asserting her sexual orientation. Additionally, she composed the sensual track "Touch Me," the concluding song on Jaguar. This song is dedicated to her fellow R&B singer, Kehlani, with whom she had a relationship, and who is featured on the remix version of the song. More on this later.
Victoria’s music often reflects themes of love, sensuality, and freedom, creating a safe space for those who feel marginalized or misunderstood. By embracing her true self, both in her personal and professional life, Monét is a powerful voice of representation for queer women of color in the music industry.
Also, is it me or does Victoria Monét stay with a baddie? Let’s run back Victoria’s dating history by using some of her hit songs.
Touch Me: Rumors of Victoria and Kehlani Dating
For years, we have been speculating that Victoria and Kehlani had a lil something going on. Just this year, the “Ass Like That” singer confirmed their relationship. During a High Low with EmRata podcast interview with Emily Ratajkowski, she spilled the tea on her past relationship with Kehlani, working with Ariana Grande, and her love for R&B legend Sade.
The innanets were saying that Victoria’s fling with Kehlani started in 2020 when they recorded the “Touch Me” remix. During the interview, the 30-year-old revealed that she was expecting a child when she and the Kehlani worked together on a song that appeared to be about the "After Hours" singer.
While maintaining a neutral stance towards past romantic partners, Monét has refrained from divulging specific details about her previous relationship with Kehlani. She told Ratajkowski, “[We’re] friends. I kind of am like that with all of my past relationships. I really don’t like the idea of like, now someone’s dead to me, unless they did… I mean, some of my relationships ended where they did me wrong.”
Victoria went on to say, “But like, I don’t know. I just got over it, and I like to have that kind of an open connection, like, I don’t wanna kill somebody off and be like there’s a rule of me not to speak to them ’cause I feel like that takes even more energy to like, try to avoid people and trying to hate them.”
Breaking Point: Victoria Monét’s Relationship With John Gaines
In their romantic journey, Victoria Monét and John Gaines have consistently centered their attention on their small family unit.
Our first glimpse of Gaines came in Victoria's music video for "Moment," where the couple shared some incredibly passionate and sensual kisses.
Initially, they maintained a low-key approach to their relationship but later announced a significant milestone in December 2020: they were anticipating the arrival of their first child. Their daughter, Hazel, entered their lives in February 2021, completing their family circle.
Later that year, Victoria shared with ESSENCE, “We’re completely in love and enjoying our new chapter. [Hazel has] really got him wrapped around her finger, and I’ve seen him change in ways that I know he didn’t expect. She’s growing us up.”
Earlier this year, we found the family oozing adorable family vibes as they all took to the Grammy red carpet looking like walking mannequins. That night our queen took home three awards including Best New Artist.
— Victoria Monét (@VictoriaMonet) September 23, 2024
After seven months, the couple revealed in a joint statement that they had decided to discretely end their relationship. “We spent the last 10 months trying to respectfully and privately navigate the fact that we are no longer in a relationship. Though we still completely adore and respect each other, we are not a couple anymore.”
The announcement continued, “There was no infidelity, toxic behavior, or drama. We both just have some fundamental growing to do that would best be done apart so we can remain the best versions of ourselves for our daughter.”
We Might Be Falling in Love: Victoria’s Budding Romance with Stormzy
Word on the street is that the Jaguar baddie has moved on with a certain tall, dark, and handsome British rapper. Victoria was seen showing some major PDA with Stormzy earlier this month. The Sun released photos of the two embracing and kissing at Heathrow Airport less than a month after Victoria announced her split from John Gaines. According to The Sun, “the 6ft 5in star grinned as he gave Victoria a hug before kissing her on the lips.” An onlooker told the outlet, “Both Stormzy and Victoria looked absolutely smitten with each other.”
Ironically, Stormzy also announced his breakup from TV host beauty Maya Jama this summer, after rekindling their romance. The stars—who had previously dated from 2014 to 2019—acknowledged that they had attempted to make their relationship work, but it ultimately didn't, and that was an acceptable outcome.
"We've been laughing whilst drafting this because we never, ever, in a million years thought we'd be the couple announcing a breakup,” the former couple wrote in a joint statement. "But for the sake of clarity and, more importantly, to allow us the space and grace that's needed for us both to be able to navigate this next bit of our lives with peace, we thought it might be best to.”
Neither camp — Stormzy or Victoria — has confirmed the dating rumors but we all know a picture is worth 1000 words.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by TheStewartofNY/WireImage