

There are very few things in this life that I adore more than my bed — and I’m not kidding. I actually picked out bedding and decor that would make my bedroom one of my absolute favorite places to be. Hell, even my friends will tell you that I’m good for saying that my bedroom space is like a Six Flags experience for me.
At the same time, what’s kind of weird about all of this is, my chronotype (more on that in just a sec) actually says that I’m most productive in the early morning hours which means that, for better or for worse, I’ve had to condition myself to be more of a morning person than my bed and I would like.
There are some proven perks to making the shift. Aside from the fact that early rising makes it possible to have more time to get more things done in a 24-hour day, there are also studies to support that being a morning person is better for your mental health, helps to lower depression-related symptoms, can make you more energized and productive throughout the day and, some research indicates that it’s better for your overall physical health and well-being too.
For all of these reasons, I thought it would be a good idea to share some tips on how you can become more of a morning person if that’s always been a goal of yours that you happen to struggle with or if you want to try it for a while to see if it truly is a good look. With the help of the following 10 tips/hacks in just a few months (give or take a few weeks), you may find yourself wondering why you weren’t getting up with the sun and the birds years ago.
Unsplash
1. Know Your Why
Something that I enjoy doing is taking personality tests, and one of the most enlightening ones that I’ve taken in a while is a chronotype one (which I talk about in the article, “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”). The general concept is we’re each a bear, wolf, lion, or dolphin. What that means is each animal speaks to the time of day when we are the most productive.
Me? I’m a lion, which means that I tend to get the most done before noon, and so when I was trying to be less of a night owl and more of a morning person during a particular season of my life, my motivation was to get enough rest so that I could get up and get more done during the time when my mind and body actually prefer to.
All of this is why I think that the first thing that you need to consider when it comes to becoming more of a morning person is to figure out why you want to do it. With a clear motive and plan in place that can inspire you to get up an hour (or more) earlier because there is a true mission in mind that can make the sacrifice (by definition, a sacrifice is giving up something good for something greater) easier.
2. Change Your Bedroom’s Window Treatments
I can tell you from personal experience that if you’ve got blackout curtains in your bedroom, it’s gonna be chal-leng-ing to try and get up in the morning, no matter how bright it may be outside. That’s because those types of window treatments are designed to keep natural light out.
That’s why, if you truly want to become more of a morning person, another thing that you should do is go with sheer curtains or opened blinds; that way, your body can start to wake up as the sun rises. As a bonus, natural light provides health benefits like a boost of vitamin D, lower stress levels, and a better night’s rest at the end of each day, so it’s kind of a win all the way around.
Unsplash
3. Create a Morning and Nighttime Routine
While checking out a doctor’s blog on the benefits of creating a life routine, some of the things that he shared is it can reduce stress, make you more efficient, and even cause your life to become more meaningful. If you add to this the fact that a routine can create habits that will last for years to come, it makes a lot of sense that it’s wise to have a morning and nighttime routine.
As far as a morning routine goes, it could be that you pray and/or meditate, journal, sip some herbal tea, go through some affirmations, or take a longer shower so that you start your day off feeling truly refreshed. On the flip side, your nighttime routine can consist of things like soaking in the tub, creating a sleep schedule, reading a book, doing some stretches before getting into bed, verbalizing some things that you are grateful for and that you accomplished throughout the day and listening to some soothing music.
The bottom line here is you rob yourself of enjoying getting out of and into bed (plus, you can throw your sleep rhythm off a bit) if you only jerk yourself out of bed in the morning and/or immediately fall asleep due to sheer exhaustion at night. That said, some tips for how to create and customize your own morning and night routine can be found here.
4. Stop Consuming Stimulants Before Bedtime
Especially as I get older, one habit that I definitely need to break is to stop drinking before going to bed. Why? Because I’m the type of person who, even if I run to the bathroom with all of the lights off in the middle of the night, once I’m awake, I’m up for at least an hour — and that can be annoying as all get out when I’m trying to get back to some quality zzz’s in. If you can relate, it really is best to stop drinking about a couple of hours before turning in.
Oh, and if stimulants like alcohol or coffee are your thing, you should go even longer without those. Alcohol needs to be at least three hours prior to your bedtime, and many health experts say that when it comes to caffeine (yes, your beloved coffee), it should be a whopping eight.
Unsplash
5. Prep for the Next Day
If a part of what you hate about getting up early in the morning is feeling rushed, there is definitely a workaround for that. You can easily add 30 minutes to your morning window by preparing for the next day the night before. This can include laying out (and ironing) your clothes, preparing your lunch, checking the best GPS travel route, and putting together your to-do list for the following day.
Just knowing that you’ve got your morning organized before turning in can help you to sleep more soundly and wake up in a more relaxed state of mind.
6. Prioritize Something in the Morning (Every Morning)
A part of the reason why some of us don’t consider ourselves to be morning people is because all we see is a day full of work and other obligations before us, and getting up earlier means that we have to do them sooner —and in comparison to staying all comfy and cozy in our bed, the bed is always going to win. That’s why another hack that could help is to prioritize something that you actually enjoy in the morning.
Maybe it’s watching a morning program, getting coffee and a pastry at a local donut shop, or exercising in the early am so that you can knock it out of the way. If you reward yourself for getting up (earlier), that can make it easier to do.
Unsplash
7. Move Your Bedtime Up (in 15-Minute Increments)
It’s kind of unrealistic to think that you will become a morning person — pardon the pun — overnight. So, one thing that could help you out is to move your bedtime up in 15-minute increments over the next 2-4 weeks or so. In other words, if you typically go to bed at 11 p.m. and you want to start waking up at 5:30 a.m. while still getting no less than seven hours of sleep, this week, go to bed at 10:45 p.m., next week at 10:30 a.m., and so on. That way, changing your sleep schedule won’t feel so drastic, and you’ll be better able to ease into it.
8. Use a Nature Sounds Alarm Setting
Believe it or not, there’s research that indicates that traditional alarm clocks aren’t as beneficial for us as we might think. For one thing, they don’t really “ease” us out of bed; it’s more like they shock us. Plus, just knowing that the sound will go off in the morning can disrupt your sleep patterns. That’s why it’s best to either go with a digital or sunrise alarm or to set your smartphone to make a nature-related sound when it’s time for you to get up (there are also nature sound alarm clocks that you can buy). These options are more soothing to the soul while still being just as effective.
Getty Images
9. Keep a Sleep Schedule (Even on the Weekends)
I once read an article that said a sleep schedule is all about prioritizing this type of rest. Well, since sleep helps to recharge and rejuvenate your system, regulate your blood sugar, boost your immunity, strengthen your cognitive abilities, reduce your stress levels, maintain a healthy weight, give you more energy, and so much more — sleep is definitely something that you should treat as a paramount practice in your life. And yes, if you want to become a morning person, a sleep schedule can help with that, too.
At the end of the day, creating a sleep schedule is all about incorporating a night routine and also making the effort to go to bed at the same time, each and every night, including the weekends (yep, a sleep schedule has no “cheat” days). If you do this consistently enough, your mind and body will treat your sleep schedule like a pattern/habit — then, before you know it, waking up in the morning will be super natural for you.
10. Choose Your Words Wisely
Last one. I once read a blog post on how to become a morning person. One of the things that it said that stood out was that it’s important to “change your story” because if all you seem to focus on — and declare — is that you are not a morning person, it’s going to be so much harder to change that reality.
You know, there is a good deal of science in these streets to back that negative words give us stress and anxiety while positive thoughts and words can literally alter our reality for the better.
So, if you really want to become a morning person, start believing and declaring that you are one — it might be the most powerful hack of all. Enjoy the shifting, sis. Ultimately, it’s worth it.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by andreswd/Getty Images
It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Leon Bennett/WireImage
Does hearing the phrase, “you’re such a good girl,” during sex turn you on? If so, you might have a “praise kink.” When I hear the term praise kink, the church girl in me wants to immediately play “The Lady, Her Lover and Lord” while riding reverse cowgirl. But that’s not what is meant by the term praise kink.
A “praise kink” is a sexual fetish that focuses on overt praise, exaggerated compliments, and an outpouring of verbal affection.
What Is a Praise Kink?
The concept of praise kinks isn't new, but thanks to TikTok, a lot of people are now realizing they might identify as praise kinksters. Currently, the hashtag #praisek1nk is trending with 568.9 million views, with tons of creators posting about their love for compliments and words of affirmation during sex. I, too, love a good compliment during sex. I once had a lover sing my praises about how good I was at a certain bedroom activity. His affirmations gave me WAP, but does that categorize me as having a praise kink?
How To Know if You Have a Praise Kink
Just because you love receiving praise doesn’t mean you have a praise kink. Someone with a praise kink experiences an intense level of sexual excitement from being praised or verbally affirmed by their partner during sex. You might have a praise kink if hearing your partner tell you how pretty you are makes you cum or if the thing that makes sex go from good to great is hearing your partner's thoughts about how good you are at giving head. And if, during solo play, the thing that gets you all hot and bothered is recalling the times your partner called you a good girl, it’s probably a praise kink.
Generally, a kink is a sexual activity that is needed for someone to enjoy sex. When it comes specifically to praise kinks, if you need reassurance from your partner that you're sexy, or good in bed in order to orgasm, you have a praise kink.
filadendron/Getty Images
Examples of Praise Kink Phrases To Try With Your Partner
If you’re new to the term and looking to explore, you probably have questions about what phrases to use. It may take a lot of communication and some trial and error to figure out what phrases work best for you and your partner. Ultimately, the best phrases to use vary from person to person and are based on what sex acts you and your partner enjoy, or what parts of their body they like complimented.
To get you started, here are some generic praise kink examples to try out with your partner:
Praise Kink Examples:
- You're such a good girl/boy.
- You're so good at [insert skill].
- You look so hot when you [insert activity].
- Your [insert body part] is irresistible.
- You taste so good. I can't get enough of you.
- You just have the perfect [body part].
- Just like that… you’re doing so good.
- Who taught you how to be so good at [something?]
While many examples of praise kink involve specific verbal affirmations, praise can also come in the form of brief words or phrases like “yes,” “keep going,” or simply a moan. No matter what type you prefer, praise kink is all about finding what feels good and exciting, and turns you and your partner on the most.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by rocketclips/Getty Images
Originally published on November 4, 2022