Who doesn’t love spring? The sun is out, the plants are blooming and everything feels new again. Spring is often viewed as the time of renewal, hence the term spring cleaning, and rebirth for your mindset, spirit, and your personal space. While the first day of spring isn’t officially until March 20, you can still get a jumpstart on breathing new life into your home.
With the weather already starting to warm up and nature peaking through from the once cold, wet ground, you too can turn your home from a dark and gloomy place to a bright, lively oasis.
Here’s how to “spring forward” into action:
1.Declutter
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Decluttering is just the beginning of cleaning up your home. Now, is the time to get rid of the junk mail that is piled up on your kitchen counter and put away (or throw away) those grocery bags you saved up just because. When putting things away, you want to make sure that it is done so in an organized fashion. Dumping your items in another spot doesn’t get rid of the clutter and it still leaves you in a state of confusion.
Just decluttering sometimes can make your space feel brand new and your mind at peace.
2.Clean
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Spring cleaning is a thing for a reason. It is one of the foundations to refreshing your home because before you bring new items in to make your home look nice, you must first get rid of the dirt in the crevices of your bathroom and dust that’s been building up on top of your fan. No judgment. We’ve all been there.
Some supplies you may need are a feather duster, broom, mop, glass cleaner, and vacuum. And Clorox wipes always gets the job done. If you’re looking for something natural and greener, then you can try baking soda, lemon, or vinegar to clean home surfaces.
3.Pack
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Sun’s out, bun’s out! Okay, maybe not literally, unless you plan on being poolside all spring/summer (and that’s your business.) But what we mean is, it’s time to pack up the winter clothes and break out the spring and summer clothing. Winter clothes are bulky and so putting them away in storage bags can help make space for your spring/summer clothes that are usually lighter.
Don’t want to put them in storage bags? You can also try putting them in the back of your closet. That goes for your accessories as well such as scarfs, hats, and your favorite pair of UGGs.
4.Plants
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Plants can help spruce up any space, but for your home, they can make your living space feel like a place of refuge. Because plants are living organisms, they automatically breathe new life into your home and their presence alone makes you feel warm inside. Plus, we are a sucker for a good aesthetic and houseplants bring a certain vibe that can dress up in any room.
If you are a plant novice you can start with English ivy or a peace lily, which doesn't require a lot of maintenance. If you’re ready to take being a plant mom to the next level, then you can try taking care of a fiddle-leaf fig tree that falls into the high-maintenance category.
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The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:
Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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