On any given day I suffer from mild to spicy anxiety but with my disability, Attention Deficit Disorder, it can be further agitated by simply taking my Adderall. If you've ever taken Adderall medicinally (not recreationally), then you know that it has a long list of symptoms including but not limited to inducing anxiety making it an overall uncomfortable, lose-lose situation. For every complaint that I have about said effect while on Adderall, I'm next to nothing without it. This proved most concerning in 2018, on the heels of turning 26 and kindly being dismissed from my family's insurance and switching to Medicaid. In addition to Medicaid having stringent rules on who and how one must go about receiving medicine for ADD/ADHD diagnosis, I was faced with prejudice from my doctor's office as soon as I made the switch. The staff over-complicated the approval process, delaying my Adderall prescriptions for six months of my semester.
To say this stifled my ability to work would do what I experienced no justice -- I spent six months paralyzed with anxiety.
Assignments would be weeks and then months late. Yet, somehow my anxiety would grow more intense at the self-imagined thoughts of disappointment and disdain. I eventually received access to my Adderall, but still: anxiety. A different kind, sure, but still very real and present. By the end of my school year, I was exhausted and I wasn't caring for myself properly -- not in ways that were meditative and healing. Taking stock of what I needed moving forward, I decided I needed to take my summer vacation to figure out better coping strategies for my anxiety. Naturally, some of the remedies on the table were obvious: working out and meditation. But, also marijuana and CBD remedies. One of those included "Recess" -- seltzer water infused with "hemp extracts".
At the top of the summer, I committed to finding natural self-soothing ways to care for myself and maintain an academic career. Recess was recommended by a classmate whose anxiety makes my anxiety attacks look like a cakewalk, but I digress. Because I only sampled the drink, I can't say for sure if it would be a lasting solution but here's what I can say:
The product was provided by Recess in exchange for my honest review.
The Flavors
Courtesy of the brand
If you already enjoy seltzer, this is definitely another brand to consider adding to your arsenal. As a seltzer drinker, I'm always looking for new flavors and these not only taste good but they're also refreshing...like actually refreshing and not like when high fructose drinks claim to be. Each can of Recess is only packed with 25 calories and 6 grams of sugar, delivering a mild but tasty kick with the following taste: Blackberry Chai (my fave), Peach Ginger, and Pomegranate. Arguably, an assortment of flava reserved for a boujee palette (It's me. The boujee palette is me).
The Marketing
The drink's creators boast about its ability to replace that afternoon cup of coffee those of us who are caffeine fiends seem to always be looking for, but beyond giving a burst of energy Recess intends to leave you more focused and reduce stress. The effect is produced by the natural ingredients, not limited to hemp extract (calming effect) but including American ginseng (energy), L-theanine (reduces stress), and Schisandra ("boosts immunity").
The Effect
Courtesy of the brand
Personally, I have never been much of a coffee drinker and I do take Adderall as it stands, so I can't say without a doubt that Recess has been the energy boost for me. However, what I can say is that it has helped with the edge of anxiety I experience in my day-to-day life. One of the major symptoms that occur when taking Adderall is teeth grinding which I believe is a result of the induced anxiety that is attached to the medicine (not entirely sure). Nonetheless, while sipping Recess I noticed I was able to control it a bit more than normal and my anxiety slowly dissipated. It provided a gentle yet calming effect, allowing me to be far more productive during the workday rather than spending half of it inefficiently self-soothing anxiety over mundane tasks. So maybe it's sparkling, but maybe it's magic. Dunno. To my satisfaction, it also provided me with an assortment of new tastes that my soda stream or even brands like LaCroix (even in all of their flavor diversity) don't offer.
However magic the sparkles in this drink are, it goes without saying that this is a very niche product, made for those living in a certain tax bracket. The $39.99 (eight pack) and $54.99 when purchased via Amazon (providing four additional cans) price point of the product is a reflection of society at large's unwillingness to make healthy and helpful things accessible to poor Black and Brown people. Because while it absolutely does make me feel better without making me lethargic or crazy-amped-up (you know the espresso vibe), I can't say that this drink is in my every day budget. So even while sampling the water I felt the need to ration it out, picking and choosing when I would douse myself in the holistic effects of this pricey water. However, in a moment of grace, I do understand how supply and demand work and can't say that them not being accessible is solely on them, as opposed to living in a capitalistic America.
Being a relatively new company is hard as is, but being new and working to bring social change (through multiple facets) can be costly when you're working against capitalism. I'm optimistic that as the company grows they will further expand their product making it available on Amazon Fresh (not to be confused with regular Amazon), where they take EBT/SNAP benefits.
But until then, try it for yourself and sip slowly.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our weekly newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
I Tried Acupuncture For The First Time & This Happened
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Sounds like something out of a novel, right? xoNecole had the opportunity to chat with the lovely couple about their wedding, reconnecting, and having a second chance at love.
Photo courtesy of Kai and Hicham Bouhmad
Kai and Hicham on Meeting for the First Time
Kai and Hicham got married on February 14, 2023, in Honolulu, Hawaii in an intimate ceremony, and plan on having a reception in Morocco, Hicham’s home country, later on. One of their wedding guests was the person responsible for their union, Hicham’s friend Karim. Kai reflected on that day when they met.
“I was at a party, and a guy walked in and was like, what’s going on in here? And I was like, well, this is a salon party for the salon that just opened, and they had free food and stuff, and I was like do you want some food?” Kai shares.
When they began talking, Karim brought up Hicham. “He was like, 'I have a friend that I want to introduce you to if you’re single,' and I said, ‘Yeah, that sounds cool.’ So, he was like, 'Well, I’m gonna send you his Facebook information. If you guys can talk on Facebook and see how you guys like each other.' So, that was six years ago, and we talked, and we got along pretty well, and then we started dating.”
Kai and Hicham Describe Their First Date
Because both of them are into the arts, they decided to go to the movies on their first date. At that time, Loving was in theaters, and according to Kai, she knew when she saw him that she wanted to marry him. “I just had that feeling,” she reveals.
Hicham also recalls their “wonderful” date that extended after the movies at a nearby restaurant. “It was a wonderful moment when we made eye contact,” he says.
Photo courtesy of Kai and Hicham Bouhmad
Their Breakup and Reconnection
While Kai saw Hicham as her husband, she wasn’t ready to settle down, but Hicham was. So, they decided to go their separate ways, and Kai began traveling the world. But little did she know that six years later, she would see him again. This time, Kai was visiting an art gallery that had just opened up and began talking to the art gallery owner.
“She [art gallery owner] said, ‘I’m having an art opening, the studio just opened, and we’re having a party next week, and you should come, and my boyfriend has a lot of friends, maybe I’ll introduce you to some of his friends,’ and I was like ‘Oh, okay,’ Kai recalls.
“And at this time, I had already booked my ticket to go to Morocco to explore by myself, solo travel. So I said, 'Oh yeah, this will be fun.' This was in April, and my trip to Morocco was just in August. So, I said, ‘Yeah, I’ll come to your little party, I’m there.’ I’m talking, and then she said 'Oh, my boyfriend is here, and here’s one of his friends.' One of his friends was Hicham.”
This happened on April 23, 2022, and they have been together ever since.
The Engagement
When Hicham reappeared in her life, Kai knew she was now ready to settle down. “I honestly got tired of doing stuff by myself. I was tired, everything I have to do by myself, and I just got tired of that,” Kai explains. “I just felt like I really wanted a partner who’s really supportive and generous and kind, and I really wanted a partner that was by my side.
One of the ways that Hicham convinced Kai to give him another shot was when he wore a cactus shirt to her house, which showed the journalist how much he paid attention to her. “I love cactuses ‘cause it reminds me of the desert. It’s bohemian, I love desert cactuses. When he showed up with a cactus shirt on, I just could not resist,” she says. “That sounds cheesy and cliche and might sound silly, but it just symbolized that he knows me deeply and what I love and paid attention to stuff I care about even though it was silly. That meant a lot.”
Not long after, Hicham knew it was time to pop the question. “Kai gave me [an] indication that she was ready, and so that’s how that all happened.” He continues, “dropping hints, and she was pretty much ready, and I proposed to her.”
Kai admits that they planned their engagement together, including ring shopping, engagement photos, etc.
Photo courtesy of Kai and Hicham Bouhmad
Advice on Finding Love Again
This is both Kai’s and Hicham’s second marriages, and they gave advice on finding love the second time around. They both share the same sentiment about being open and optimistic. Both come from different cultural backgrounds and while that alone could have held them back from pursuing one another, they were open to love.
“Get out of your comfort zone and don’t limit yourself and don’t fear to fail because from failure you learn to build yourself up,” Hicham says.
And at the end of the day, it’s important to establish a friendship first. “Another [piece of] advice, just make sure you like the person,” Kai says, “and that’s really important because you have to make sure even if you have a disagreement or arguments, at the end of the day, you have to ask yourself, do I like this person? And just make sure you really like them.”
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Feature image courtesy of Kai and Hicham Bouhmad
