Mom Guilt: Why You’re Not Alone
Getty Images

Mom Guilt: Why You’re Not Alone

The "byproduct of striving for perfect parenting" is something a lot of mothers know all too well.


More and more mothers are getting candid about the realities of having mom guilt. Healthlinedefined mom guilt as “that pervasive feeling of not doing enough as a parent, not doing things right, or making decisions that may “mess up” your kids in the long run.” Many working moms cite having mom guilt due to their careers such as two-time Olympic gold medalist Natasha Hastings.

The track athlete shared in an essay for Insider that explored her experience dealing with mom guilt as a mother to a two-year-old son. But not only is she an athlete, but she is also a student pursuing a master’s in clinical mental health, which makes for a busy schedule.

For those reasons, she has often worried about missing out on those special moments with her son, but instead of feeling defeated, she tries to analyze those feelings. “When I feel mom guilt, I don't reject it,” she said. “I allow myself to feel it, investigate it, and determine whether its presence is a sign that something needs to change or if I am simply being too hard on myself.”

Psychology Today shared that mom guilt is a “byproduct of striving for perfect parenting” and it can lead to anxiety. While these things may be true, it doesn’t stop parents from having them.

Some celeb-moms have opened up about dealing with mom guilt. Since the birth of her daughter Kaavia James Union Wade, Gabrielle Union has shared adorable moments spent between the two and her husband Dwyane Wade. The couple had Kaavia via surrogate after the actress was diagnosed with adenomyosis, which is a type of endometriosis.

In a Dec. post, the L.A’s Finest star revealed on Instagram that she was having mom guilt after missing her daughter’s play. “Hardest part about being a working Mom is missing important events in your kid’s lives,” she wrote. “Today I missed @kaaviajames holiday program at school and felt so awful to disappoint her. So I did the next best thing and I became her hype woman before I left for work.”

She also said in an interview with Yahoo! that sometimes the guilt makes her be less strict with her parenting.

However, some women noted that children seeing their parents work is a good thing. "That first year is always hard when you go to work and you’ve been a stay-at-home mom for a while, or on maternity leave, but now that my kids are older, I think it’s pretty badass and cool for them to see their mom do what she loves to do," Tamera Mowry said in an interview with Us Weekly.

But for the moms that haven’t reached the point of any longer feeling guilty, just know that you aren’t alone in having mom guilt. Healthline mentioned some other ways you can combat mom guilt such as knowing your truth, surrounding yourself with positive people, and listening to your intuition and kids.

Featured image by Getty Images