Lizzo Reminds Us The Root Of Success Lies In Sisterhood & Self-Love
As we enter the back half of 2020 and the pending presidential election, many of us are overwhelmed and stressed. In this 'new normal', where everything is virtual and social distancing is mandatory, the focus on well-being, from the inside out, has become a priority. Every day we're met with new techniques and tips to heal ourselves, cleanse our spirits, or take care of our mental health. One of the biggest proponents of that movement right now is Melissa Viviene Jefferson - more commonly known as Lizzo.
Lizzo sat down with Vogueto discuss sisterhood, being 'body-normative', and being of service to her culture. The interviews were taken over a three-month period that included #BlackoutTuesday and the historic announcement of Kamala Harris. In what seemed to be one of Lizzo's more revealing interviews, sisterhood and self-love are a prominent thread throughout.
Sisterhood is something Lizzo not only sings about but practices heavily IRL. The two most important members of her team, her DJ and her Creative Director, are her best friends. The three of them built this career from their bootstraps and continued to challenge each other to accomplish their individual dreams. And that bond doesn't just stop with her day ones.
"We have gone through so much since meeting each other. And we have always made sure that the relationship is what we prioritize. It's never been money. It's never been the career."
And that bond doesn't just stop with her day ones. In the interview, she remarks on her relationship with rap legend Missy Elliott and how they practice self-care for one another. She also credits manifestation a bit for her relationship with Missy.
"I don't know what happened first. Having the thoughts because it was gonna happen? Or having the thoughts and driving myself to make it happen? But knowing that it did, yeah, is incredible."
That sisterhood helped give her the confidence to take on other pressing issues in our world, like white supremacy, sexism, and fatphobia - to name a few. Like many of us, Lizzo feels constantly disappointed by the state of America and wants to facilitate the uncomfortable changes for the future. One step towards that is the adoption of 'body-normative', veering from the body positivity message she's known for. From doing the work to love herself, she's able to be a vessel of self-love for others.
"Now, you look at the hashtag 'body-positive,' and you see smaller-framed girls, curvier girls. Lotta white girls. And I feel no way about that because inclusivity is what my message is always about. I'm glad that this conversation is being included in the mainstream narrative.
"What I don't like is how the people that this term was created for are not benefiting from it. I would like to be body-normative. I want to normalize my body. And not just be like, 'Ooh, look at this cool movement. Being fat is body positive.' No, being fat is normal. I think now, I owe it to the people who started this to not just stop here."
Lizzo truly wants to be in service of her culture, but she knows that comes with a lot of self-love and care. She touches on the importance of the world's perspective of her because that impacts young women that look like her. And while she's excited for the potential for the first Black woman as a Vice President, she hopes it comes with real change.
"A lot of times I feel like we get distracted by the veneer of things. If things appear to be better, but they're not actually better, we lose our sense of protest."
To read Lizzo's October cover story in full, head over to Vogue.com.
Featured image via Giphy
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Courtney is a contributing writer, based in Puerto Rico by way of Tennessee. Interested in the intersection of fashion and culture, she has an affinity for fashion, empowerment, and really good tacos. Keep up with her on Instagram (@hautecourtxo).
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Why We'll Probably Never Hear Lupita Nyong'o Share Her Relationship With The World
Lupita Nyong'o is sharing a transparent look into her life after a recent breakup.
In a cover story for NET-A-PORTER, the A Quiet Place: Day One star shed light on the significant heartbreak she experienced following the end of her relationship with ex-boyfriend and TV host, Selema Masekela.
As a public figure, Nyong'o, 39, sought to divulge the news of the breakup in hopes of presenting a more authentic perspective on the pain that follows a separation.
"I was living in a lot of pain and heartbreak," she told the publication. "I looked at the environment of my social media and thought I don’t want to be a part of this illusion that everything is always coming up roses. Surely there is a lesson for me to learn in this, and I just want to be real about it."
The Black Panther star went on to explain that her choice to be transparent with her fans about her breakup came from the certainty she felt after ending the relationship. “In my mind, when I shared my relationship status with the world, it was because I felt sure about it,” she said.
While she didn’t know how the news would land with her fans, she found relief in knowing she wasn’t alone in her experience.
“I knew how it could be interpreted; I knew it would have a life of its own,” she reflects. “But then I started to see the comments and people were being so loving and supportive. The ones that moved me the most were other people sharing their pain and their heartbreak.”
Nyong'o and Masekela went Instagram official in December 2022, publicly announcing their relationship in a couple's video. In October 2023, Nyong'o took to her personal Instagram account to share the news of her breakup in her caption, writing, "At this moment, it is necessary for me to share a personal truth and publicly dissociate myself from someone I can no longer trust.”
She continued the vulnerable note, "I find myself in a season of heartbreak because of a love suddenly and devastatingly extinguished by deception. I am tempted to run into the shadows and hide, only to return to the light when I have regained my strength enough for me to say, 'Whatever, my life is better this way.' But I am reminded that the magnitude of the pain I am feeling is equal to the measure of my capacity for love."
These days, Nyong'o tells NET-A-PORTER that she is prioritizing profound self-discovery that extends beyond her career. She notes having a deliberate and unhurried approach to understanding herself.
She also alludes to keeping her relationships private moving forward after noting it was "very, very sage" of her not to talk about her private life professionally in the days before her last relationship. "I'm going back to those days by the way," Nyong'o shares of her reinstated boundaries around her personal life.
Earlier this month, Nyong'o made headlines alongside her new boyfriend actor Joshua Jackson. Nyong'o and Jackson went through public splits from their respective SOs in October 2023, with the latter splitting from his long-time partner Jodie Turner-Smith following her divorce filing from the Dawson's Creek alum.
The pair have been spotted together as early as December 2023, but nothing screamed "couple" quite as loudly as their recent getaway to Mexico for Nyong'o's 41st birthday featuring passionate displays of affection.
"Our purpose in life is to love. And so you have to get back in it," she tells the outlet, seemingly alluding to her budding new romance.
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Featured image by Taylor Hill/Getty Images