

I've had gray hair since I was nineteen. One here. Two or three there. Since I turned thirty, those two or three have multiplied and now are visible along my temples, my widow's peak, and sprinkled throughout the crown of my head. There was a time when I was coloring my hair with box color every six weeks to make sure I covered the gray so that I didn't look "old."
When I turned thirty-two, I decided to give up my beloved jet black hair dye to embrace my grays since premature graying is something that has been passed down for generations on my mom's side of the family. She calls it "the Spencer gene" and seeing the gray hair makes me feel like I'm carrying the generation of women before me every day.
I'd always joked about just dying my entire head gray and just getting it over with, so when I saw hair paint wax floating around on Instagram, I was intrigued. Changing the color of my hair hasn't been what's stopped me from taking to plunge, but since my hair is dark and coily, going lighter usually means a lot of maintenance and the possibility of damage. Been there, done that, and have the #tbt pictures to show it.
Been there, done that, and have the #tbt pictures to prove it.
After watching a few YouTube tutorials and taking an IG deep-dive to see how other ladies hair turned out, I went over to Amazon and bought "silver" MOFAJANG wax. To be honest, I was a little nervous. My mind raced (I overthink everything) with questions like, "Will my hair still be on my head after I rinse this off? What is in it?" The Amazon description reads "made from natural ingredients, no scalp irritation, environmentally friendly and no harm to your health."
I guess I'll have to take their word for it.
Bianca Lambert/xoNecole
The product arrived on Sunday. I was going to wait until the weekend to use it just in case I got called in for an audition, but I woke up at 4 am Monday morning and couldn't go back to sleep. So, I decided it was time to give this hair paint a try. The directions say that your hair should be dry, but I re-wet my hair with my spray bottle and did my hair the same way I'd do my usual wash and go — part my hair in six sections, spray with water, smooth gel on my hair (with prayer hands), then I added the wax on top, and dried it with my diffuser.
It took me an extra few minutes to make sure the hair paint was disputed evenly throughout my hair and the impact on how much time it took me to do my hair was minimal, but it was messy.
I had hair paint on my face, under my arm (No clue how it got there.), on my water bottle, but it all washed right off with water. No scrubbing needed.
Bianca Lambert/xoNecole
Once my hair dried, I loved it. My curls felt the same way it would if I hadn't added the wax to my hair. I wore a black turtleneck that day to see if it would flake off on my clothes, which it did, but it wasn't enough to bother me. It would only flake off when I'd fluff my hair, but other than that there was no transfer. Once it's on, it's on.
The next day, I tried a puff to see how the hair paint would fair beyond day one. Since I needed to spray my hair with water to be able to get it up into a puff, I lost a little of the color at the base of my head in the process, but the color on the ends of my hair stayed intact until I washed it two days later.
Bianca Lambert/xoNecole
I had a lot of fun using this product. It gave me a new look without much effort and without the damage (and cost) of coloring my hair permanently — and it washed right out on wash day.
If you're a natural girl that wants to try something new, I'd highly recommend this. Since it's wax, I'm not sure how it would do on straight hair, but I still think it might be worth a try!
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Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
Colman Domingo’s Career Advice Is A Reminder That Our Words Shape Our Reality
When it comes to life, we are always here for a good reminder to shift our mindsets, and Colman Domingo just gave us one we didn't know we needed.
In a resurfaced clip from an appearance at NewFest shared as a repost via Micheaux Film Festival, the Emmy award winner dropped a gem on how he has navigated his decades-spanning career in Hollywood. The gem in question? Well, Colman has never identified with "struggle" in his career. Let that sit.
Colman Domingo On Not Claiming Struggle
"I’ve never said that this career was tough. I’ve never said it was difficult. I’ve never said it was hard," Colman said. "Other people would say that—‘oh, you're in a very difficult industry. It's very hard to get work and book work.’ I’m like, I’ve never believed that."
Instead of allowing himself to be defined by other people's projections about their perceptions of what the industry is or was, Colman dared to believe differently even if his reality was playing catch up with his dreams:
"Like Maya Angelou said words are things. And if you believe that, then that's actually what it is. Actually I've just never believed it. Someone told me some years ago, they said, 'I remember you were, you're a struggling actor.' I'm like, 'I don't.'"
"I wasn't attached to a struggle. I was attached to living..."
He continued:
"Even when I was bartending and hustling and not having opportunities or anything, I never believed that I was struggling because I wasn't attached to a struggle. I was attached to living and creating and being curious."
Colman’s philosophy of attaching to living instead of struggle has blossomed into an enduring career. He first made his mark on stage in acclaimed Broadway productions before transitioning to the screen, where his star began to rise in the 2010s following his role as Victor Strand in Fear The Walking Dead. From there, his presence only grew, landing memorable supporting roles in If Beale Street Could Talk, Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, and the hit series Euphoria.
In more recent years, Colman has stepped fully into the spotlight with standout leading performances in Rustin and Sing Sing, both of which earned him widespread critical acclaim and Academy Award nominations for Best Actor.
With all that said, Colman's advice is no doubt powerful, especially for those who are chasing their dreams, building something from the ground up, or have question marks about what's next in their careers. Words shape our realities, and how we speak about our journeys even in passing matters.
Words Create Our Reality & Colman Is Living Proof
"I tell young people that. To remember the words that you say about yourself and your career are true. So, I choose to make it full of light and love and it's interesting and every day I'm going to learn something new even if it looks like I don't have what I want but it's important to be in the moment... you really build on the moments moment to moment.
"And you're looking back at your career as I've been in it for what 33 years and you're like, 'Wow, that's what I've been doing.' And I've stayed strong to that so I think that is truly my advice."
Let this be your sign to give your path a reframe. When the path you're on feels uncertain, the journey is still unfolding. Like Colman said: "I wasn't attached to a struggle. I was attached to living."
That's a Black king right there.
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Featured image by Soul Brother/Soul B Photos/Shutterstock