Pregnancy is the most uncomfortable, glorious, life-affirming period in a woman's life. It's also riddled with ups and downs, harsh criticisms, and salacious social standards. Recently, Cyn Santana, who is expecting her first child with Joe Budden, took to Instagram to defend a recent photo that drew one commenter to suggest she hurry up and give birth because her nose was getting wide. Santana's response to this short-sighted comment got straight to the point:
"I read a comment that said 'I cant wait for you to drop your baby. Your nose is way too big,' and it made me really sad. Not because it hurt my feelings… (cause I don't give a f-ck what y'all talkin bout) but because others have to deal with reading these type of low comments. What about those who don't have thick skin? Those that are easily affected by outside commentators? Just the thought of it alone makes me cringe and breaks my heart. Unfortunately, cruel people exist in this world. There's nothing that we can do about them. So we need to protect ourselves and lift each other up. So this goes out to ALL my women. Pregnant or not. Big nose or small nose. Embrace it. Embrace you. You are beautiful. Please don't pay attention to fake pages with 3 posts and 127 followers. It really isn't about you. It's about them. They're facing daily struggles and this is how they cope. By coming on social media and tearing others down. Don't take them too personal Nose: my baby boy and lashes: @lexlashesofficial "
While the mother-to-be focused mainly on the fact that she was strong enough to shake off the hatred - the part that stood out to me was the very last line. Her wide nose is not just courtesy of her son, it's a sign that he is healthy and developing well.
The changes and developments that happen to pregnant women are often a sign that a baby is thriving and the mother's body is working overtime to support that. But with devastating studies coming out about black women and maternal fatality, understanding pregnancy is not something that should be put off until the stick turns blue.
Well before the condoms are dismissed, it's important to get to know the full extent of women's bodies - your body - and why it changes during pregnancy. Especially those changes that are more often made light of and scrutinized by society.
The Nose Spread
The way our bodies react to pregnancy hormones is different for every woman. But all women experience an increase in hormones such as estrogen, which is the culprit behind nose spreading and acne. It's also the hormone that floods the baby with nutrients and ensures it's progressive weight gain throughout gestation.
When we see a pregnant woman with a wide nose, we're looking at a woman with a thriving baby and she should be congratulated on a job well done.
Hair Loss
Another change that can happen during and after pregnancy - also due to hormonal changes - is hair loss. So many women flood the internet looking for answers to their shedding postnatal hair because they didn't even know it was a side effect. After the body has been operating on overdrive for 10 months, the dissipation of hormones as they leave the body tends to take a toll on hair lines.
Unless severe, this is also just a sign that a woman is successfully transitioning back into her pre-baby self. Again, she should be handed a medal.
Overwhelming Emotions
Emotional changes during pregnancy are probably the most difficult and ironically, the most commonly mocked. A raging pregnant woman hopped up on her own emotions, desperately seeking something to snack on is a tired stereotype that can be damaging to our ability to support each other. Most of us flip out when our nail breaks or when our hair won't cooperate or when we gain those 12 additional Christmas pounds. But during pregnancy, your entire body changes overnight and you have no control over what obstacles you'll be faced with.
To experience that and also be told by a dozen strangers at a mall that you look "ready to pop" isn't just worthy of an eye roll, it's objectifying and disrespectful.
The "Snap-Back" Myth
There is an obsession with the developing bodies of pregnant and postpartum women. As soon as a baby is announced, the "bump watch" begins. If she gets too large, the question is will she snap back. If she's not large enough, people wonder if she's obsessing over her weight. As soon as she delivers, the countdown to the coveted snap-back is launched. What about how the mother feels? What about the health of the baby?
Snapping back starts the moment you get pregnant and opting for healthy food choices and creating a consistent workout along with breastfeeding. These are the only methods of controlling how quickly your body will return to its former glory.
The more we educate ourselves about pregnancy, the more we can be supportive to each other and build awareness - not jokes - around maternal and fetal health.
Featured image by Shutterstock
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