Chlöe is a star - and that’s the sentence. Denying her talent, effervescence, and effortless beauty would be a disservice to Black women, girls, and the entertainment industry at large, as we’ve all watched her blossom from the younger version of her Parkwood Entertainment mentor Beyoncé in The Fighting Temptations to gearing up for her first headlining tour.
As she continues to rise to the top and establish her brand in addition to being one-half of 5x Grammy-nominated duo Chloe x Halle with her sister and The Little Mermaid star Halle Bailey, Chlöe uses her platform to normalize conversations around body image, sexuality, self-esteem, and self-love while showing the world she can stand on her own. However, as with anything worth having, nothing comes easy, and Miss Bailey is no exception to the rule when it comes to her climb to the top of the entertainment industry tackling singing, songwriting, performing, producing, and now starring in two upcoming projects.
Ahead of the premiere of Peacock’s Praise This and Prime Video’s Swarm, in which Chlöe nabbed a starring role in both, xoNecole spoke with the “Surprise” singer about being rooted in her faith in God, how crying helps her creativity, and how God’s timing allowed her to land a role with Donald Glover.
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Chlöe Is Keeping It Together - At Least She’s Trying
In an effort to keep herself balanced and in tune with the highest version of herself, the “Have Mercy” singer retains a strong relationship with her faith. “Without God, I probably would've run amuck by now. It definitely helps my mental health, that's for sure,” she told xoNecole openly and honestly. “All of the days where I feel like I can't carry on, I just pray and it just helps me believe in something greater than myself because when you take yourself out of your own thoughts, and your own mind, and how people might see you, just kind of think about, How can I give back? How can I let people see my heart? and really start thinking about the deeper and greater message.”
Keeping her mental health in order is absolutely a priority for the “For The Night” singer, especially as she takes on difficult characters and challenging storylines such as Donald Glover and Janine Nabers’ forthcoming horror series Swarm. As the show surrounds topics of cult-like fandom behavior, suicidal ideations, anxiety, and depression, the Atlanta-bred singer noted that taking on the storyline wasn’t as difficult as she envisioned because of her empathy for her character Marissa.
"All of the days where I feel like I can't carry on, I just pray and it just helps me believe in something greater than myself."
“It wasn't difficult at all. It wasn't hard at all. I think it was almost healing in a way, for me to portray Marissa because a lot of Marissa [is] Chlöe, and what I love about her is she is the glue that keeps everyone together,” she added, as she noted her Swarm character as “positive” and “optimistic,” who plays the love interest of Snowfall’s Damson Idris.
Though the show is categorized as thriller-suspense-horror, Marissa serves as the light that balances out Dominique Fishback’s character Dre through their bond and love of music. “I read the first episode and I broke down crying. It's such a unique and artistic way to talk about mental health. I think in today's society, the only way people really pay attention is when there's shock value, but when you peel back the layers, it's a story about sisterhood and mental health and how they hold each other up. I saw so much of myself in Marissa's character, and I want to do it, just from the first episode, because I saw myself in her.”
On the flip side, Chlöe’s character Sam in Peacock’s original film Praise This, which is set for release on April 7, is on the rise to superstardom with the support of her cousin (played by Moxie actress Anjelika Washington) while balancing her love for music and her faith in God. Similar to Sam, the former grown-ish star notes that her faith and spirituality play a large part in her discernment as she navigates through the industry as a 25-year-old multi-hyphenated icon in the making.
It’s All In His Timing
“I feel like knowing that I can rely [on] and lay all my troubles on God, it helps take the stress and the pressure off of myself. I can only speak for myself personally, but I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect and to make minimal mistakes, and things of that nature, but when I relinquish that control and give it up to a higher power, it makes me beat up on myself less, and it makes me trust God's timing,” Chlöe admitted to xoNecole.
The “Treat Me” singer also noted that she’s learned about the external workings of God’s timing, especially when she tries to piece things together and they do not work out the way that she may have intended. "A prime example of that is the album, In Pieces; it's coming out March 31st. I began the project three years ago, and I could not pick a more perfect timing,” she said reassuring herself aloud. “It's a week apart from Praise This, and a week and a half away from my first headlining tour, so it's something that I couldn't have put together myself, or even thought of, or dreamt of. Seeing how everything is falling into place and working out, that is truly God.”
"Seeing how everything is falling into place and working out, that is truly God."
In the same vein of divine timing, Chlöe noted how her latest role in Prime Video’s Swarm series as Marissa was the perfect example of manifesting and trusting in God. After receiving an email in her inbox about an untitled Donald Glover project, the singer instantly geeked out as she’s been a fan of the Atlanta star and his Childish Gambino musical alias for years prior to the offer.
“On all of my vision boards, he was on them, which is crazy. I just put that together as I'm saying it out loud. Wow, that's crazy,” she said while smiling as she noted the same instance for her co-star Dominique Fishback who plays Dre. “Dom told me the same thing when we were filming it. He was on her vision board for the year before that she got this role, so it's crazy. Everything's meant to be in its right timing.”
Let Go and Let God
Admitting to Chlöe that her response about divine intervention and God’s timing made me emotional, she encouraged me that our conversation between me, her, and Praise This director Tina Gordon was a safe space for tears to be shed. “I'm a crier. I be crying, I cry at least one times a day. One to 20 times a day,” she said, joking but serious. In fact, she shared that some of her most creative ideas stem from a good ole fashioned Mariah Carey “We Belong Together” shower cry.
“You feel like you're in the music video, and then you feel like you're just getting it all out. You can cry out. Also, that's the best place for ideas,” Chlöe shared. “The second place for me to get ideas is the bathroom. There'd be so many times I'm in the studio and I'm stuck, I'm like, Okay, I need to go pee, use the restroom, and next thing you know, I'm sitting there and the idea pops in my head. Now because of that, I always bring my phone with me so I can record it on my phone because that's where the ideas will come.”
Gordon chimed in, “They say the reason for that is [the] shower is a sensory deprivation because you're not taking in so much. It's like the quiet idea again, you're in an encapsulated area. The water has a lot to do with it too, so you're able to listen more without distraction.” Chlöe and I both nodded in agreement that the small factoid made a large amount of sense.
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If You All Would Turn Your Pages To…
In times of doubt, fear, or insecurity, Chlöe is no stranger to leaning on the man upstairs, but there are certain quotes and bible verses that she turns to for reassurance. While the quote, “to whom much is given, much is expected” lives rent-free in her head as a motto by which she frequently lives by, the “Do It” singer’s favorite Bible verses are in fact, Isaiah 54:17 - “No weapon formed against me shall prosper” - and Philippians 4:13 - “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
“When I feel like the world and life kind of takes me down and tears me down, that's what I tell myself. God gave me this [gift]. God put this message in my heart and this purpose in my soul. It's up to me to pay it forward and give it back, and hopefully heal through the music, and let God's light shine through me,” Chlöe shared. “Every time I go on stage, what I say in my prayer, I'm like, God, please let people see your light shining through me. It just allows me to just release, and have fun, and let Him do the work.”
Gordon noted that Isaiah 54:17 is featured in the Peacock original film, which co-stars Quavo, Loren Lott, and Mack Wilds, because it serves as a “quick confidence boost” for her in dark times. “Whether I come out with what I envisioned or didn't, I can say that and go into the room,” she said. “By testing my own faith and knowing that there are things that I can actually relinquish control over, things that I can't control anyway, and I can watch God move in my life on my behalf.”
Chlöe stars in Praise This, which premieres on Peacock on April 7. Swarm premieres on March 7 on Prime Video.
Featured image by Monica Schipper/Getty Images
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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