When it comes to the fashion world, there's no denying the direct influence and contribution of Black women.
Although recognition and credit tend to go unsaid, the simple truth is: Black women are the blueprint. As the tides shift within the industry, the true measure of sustainable progress will be weighed by how well the new class of designers and emerging brands are embraced and amplified. However, it's important to note that this isn't a request for permission: this is an announcement. Black designers aren't waiting for a chance for their stories to be told, they're letting their brands speak for themselves. And if you truly want to know where the future of fashion is headed, you must first tap into the rising voices who are creating history today.
Meet Sadé Lewis and Shaniya Charles, the design duo behind the self-titled fashion and lifestyle brand, Sadé + Shaniya. When the two Brooklynites met in their high school English class, their bond was formed over their shared interest in extracurricular activities, like Modeling Club and their desire to dissect the ambiguity of the industry they aspired to break into. As Sadé shares, "I feel like we align on things that we didn't like about the fashion industry and how it real mysterious and superficial, as well as not really seeing people that looked like us at the forefront."
Shaniya Charles, left. Sadé Lewis, right.
Photo Credit: Pia Fergus
As graduates of the prestigious Fashion Institute of Technology, FIT, the pair have been able to combine their talents beyond the textbooks, weaving their story into the fabric of their take on accessible high fashion and ready-to-wear pieces. Drawing inspiration from their personal journey, Black culture, and womanhood, the complex and nuanced experience that Black women share serves as a natural muse for everything they put their hands to.
Their signature design, the Mora Bag, tells a story of the duality of Black womanhood that serves as a stylish and metaphorical reminder to pack light and be light. "The color palettes that we looking into were [colors] that would trigger us to be soft and more vulnerable. There's always the notion that the Black woman is hard, she's strong, and she can do all these things. And she can, but she also has to step into the power of being vulnerable, being open, and being able to feel like you can release," Shaniya shares.
When the innovation of two Black women joins forces, there's no limit to the possibilities that they can unleash. Luckily, xoNecole has a front-row seat to the beginning stages of these dynamic designers, destined to dominate the fashion world on their own terms.
xoNecole: As Black women, sometimes we don't always have control over our narratives. With storytelling being such a huge part of you all’s design process, how does Black womanhood play the role of muse for you two?
Sadé Lewis: The origin of our collections, everything is based off a real story or feeling. For example, The Looking Glass [collection] was very much about looking yourself in the mirror and seeing this multifaceted person. You don't have to fit into one version of yourself, or one version of what people think you should be, you are many things. So that was our individual journey during that time. Literally, accepting us being women who can be everything at once, you know? It definitely always comes from something that we're going through. We don't try to pressure ourselves to create timing. It just comes when it comes. And yeah, it's always from within us, navigating our own lives, then figuring out how can we make a physical manifestation of how we feel.
Shaniya Charles: We also grab inspiration from the woman that we talk to, the people that we deal with on an everyday basis, and the majority of them are Black women. We try to make sure that we're telling their stories as well. Although it's our narrative, we want to make sure that our consumers are connecting to what we're putting out and feel or see themselves in what we are creating.
Sadé Lewis: As Black women, we want to be safe, we want to be able to control our narratives and our lives. This brand for us isn't just popularity. It's so we can have the freedom to be our absolute selves and create how we want to create, tell our story how we want to tell our story, and live how we want to live - and be an avenue for other people to do the same. The overall goal is to be able to support other women and other creatives in their endeavors.
"As Black women, we want to be safe, we want to be able to control our narratives and our lives. This brand for us isn't just popularity. It's so we can have the freedom to be our absolute selves and create how we want to create, tell our story how we want to tell our story, and live how we want to live - and be an avenue for other people to do the same. The overall goal is to be able to support other women and other creatives in their endeavors."
Photo Credit: Pia Fergus
Let’s get into your short film which premiered on the Council of Fashion Designers of America (CFDA)! That was you all’s first short film too. What was the inspiration behind the 'Green Eyes'' story?
Shaniya: First and foremost, we both love Erykah Badu! Green Eyes is one of our favorite songs. Sadé was listening to the song in the shower. And she came out and she was like, "I have an idea. We're going to create a visual fashion show based on this!" From there, we just started planning out what we wanted the story to be, the garments we would create for it, and how that would be an introduction to our actual collection that was coming up. We partnered with a Black woman to create the film; we wanted to make sure that although it's our story, that the people involved in it were also authentic and Black.
Sadé: That shower moment was literally me listening to the song. It almost felt like I was in a trance. There's no visual for that song, so it was just me envisioning alone and in a way pleading to this man. When it comes to communication between a man and a woman, sometimes it's just not there. We have egos and pride. The story that Erykah was telling was a matter of pride. It's not time to put your pride out there when you really feel this is your person. This is your soulmate, but your pride is literally ruining everything.
It was really cool to work with the director, Kyra Andrews. She has a theme about her work where she does love stories and Black romance shorts. It was really cool to tell her about our ideas and how we connect to the song and see how she could visually support that the film. It was very hands-on for all of us, even the actors in the film. We did it in one day, in the middle of a snowstorm, but it was really fun. Seeing the end result was like, wow.
As two Black women and emerging designers, I’m sure there have been obstacles that you’ve had to overcome through your trajectory. What are some of the challenges that you all experienced starting out?
Sadé: This is an industry that in all honesty, a lot of the cultural, creative, and artistic design aspects do come from Black people - we are at the forefront of a lot of those things. It's also hard as women to be respected and to be taken seriously. I don't know when those challenges will ever end for our people. So when things get hard and we might feel like our message is not getting across or things didn't perform as well as we want it to, we do have each other to remind us why we're here and that we're in it for the long run; we're not in it to be a quick trend.
You both have been friends for over a decade. How has it been working together while maintaining your friendship? How do you all make it work?
Shaniya: Our communication has always been at the forefront. From high school, we've always been very honest with each other. We make sure that we are each others' open and safe space. Even if something's bothering me, or something's bothering her, we try our best to communicate that. And I think the communication aspect and comfortability that we both have in each other allows us to explore different avenues of friendship and business partnership.
Sadé: We don't really have much of a system in place because I know it's important to separate business from friendship; it's not much a strict structure. But I think the both of us know when it's time to talk business and just time to just be friends. We have a good sense of understanding each other's needs. Just having that grace for each other and knowing when to read the room.
"I think the both of us know when it's time to talk business and just time to just be friends. We have a good sense of understanding each other's needs. Just having that grace for each other and knowing when to read the room."
Photo Credit: Pia Fergus
The whole “networking across” concept that Issa Rae famously coined has really become a collective mindset for many creatives. For those who are looking for their creative partner-in-crime, what are some tips that you would give to finding one successfully?
Sadé: I would say, be open and honest about your needs. I think a lot of times when people are doing something creative, or looking for a service, they go to Google and type in, "Photographers. NYC." And it's like, you might know someone from your high school or your college who's into photography. I think we have to have more of a mindset of working together. If we all came together with our respective interests, we could be so powerful.
It's not necessarily always about looking up to these big names. Because a lot of the time, they're not going to have the same respect. Or uphold your ideas and your project to the same reverence as someone who is grinding just like you. And then you'll learn who you can really build with. Just be open to the people around you and what they can offer.
Shaniya: Be authentic to who you are. It's a lot of pressure and there's a lot coming at you at once in terms of being creative, but I feel like you should just be authentic to who you are. If you like photography or design, you'll align with the people that you're supposed to align with. We have so much pressure around us now from social media and a whole bunch of different outlets saying, you should do this, you should do that. But just be authentic and true to who you are as a person. And whatever is supposed to align with you and the people that you are supposed to meet will come your way and those relationships will foster and grow to be what you need them to be.
"It's not necessarily always about looking up to these big names. Because a lot of the time, they're not going to have the same respect. Or uphold your ideas and your project to the same reverence as someone who is grinding just like you. And then you'll learn who you can really build with. Just be open to the people around you and what they can offer."
Photo Credit: Pia Fergus
It’s really encouraging to hear that you all are able to lean on each other through the ups and the downs of your journey. Is there anything that you all tell each other to keep each other motivated?
Sadé: We have these little moments where we'll just go to each other and we'll be like, "Girl, you the sh*t." Or, "Wow, you really my best friend, you a bad b*tch." Stuff like that. Also, because we put a lot of storytelling and meaning behind our collection, we use that to align ourselves. This work comes from a place within.
It's always from a place based on the story that we're telling and our experiences together. I feel like that is our anchor; reminding each other that you're creating from a real place. And also, we both come from the fashion industry. We studied it in college and we also work in it. It's like, you really know what you're doing. Just trust yourself and keep going.
To stay connected to Shaniya and Sadé's upcoming collection, and cop a Mora Bag of your own, click here.
Featured image courtesy of Sadé + Shaniya
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Kayla Nicole says she wore a dress that was once worn by Braxton herself for the Halloween costume. “It’s not a secret Toni is more on the petite side. I’m obsessed with all 5’2” of her,” she tells xoNecole via email. “But I’m 5’10'' and not missing any meals, honey, so to my surprise, when I got the dress and it actually fit, I knew it was destiny.”
The episode was the perfect way for the multihyphenate to take control of her own narrative. By addressing the viral moment on her own platform, she was able to stir the conversation and keep the focus on her adoration for Braxton, an artist she says she grew up listening to and who still makes her most-played playlist every year. Elsewhere, she likely would’ve received questions about whether or not the costume was a subliminal aimed at her ex-boyfriend and his pop star fiancée. “I think that people will try to project their own narratives, right?” she said, hinting at this in the episode. “But, for me personally – I think it’s very important to say this in this moment – I’m not in the business of tearing other women down. I’m in the business of celebrating them.”
Kayla Nicole is among xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, powered by SheaMoisture, recognized in the Viral Voices category for her work in media and the trends she sets on our timelines, all while prioritizing her own mental and physical health. As she puts it: “Yes, I’m curating conversations on my podcast The Pre-Game, and cultivating community with my wellness brand Tribe Therepē.”
Despite being the frequent topic of conversation online, Kayla Nicole says she’s learning to take advantage of her growing social media platform without becoming consumed by it. “I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out,” she says.
On The Pre-Game, which launched earlier this year, she has positioned herself as listeners “homegirl.” “There’s definitely a delicate dance between being genuine and oversharing, and I’ve had to learn that the hard way. Now I share from a place of reflection, not reaction,” she says. “If it can help someone feel seen or less alone, I’ll talk about it within reason. But I’ve certainly learned to protect parts of my life that I cherish most. I share what serves connection but doesn’t cost me peace.
"I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out."
Credit: Malcolm Roberson
Throughout each episode, she sips a cocktail and addresses trending topics (even when they involve herself). It’s a platform the Pepperdine University alumnus has been preparing to have since she graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, with a concentration in political science.
“I just knew I was going to end up on a local news network at the head anchor table, breaking high speed chases, and tossing it to the weather girl,” she says. Instead, she ended up working as an assistant at TMZ before covering sports as a freelance reporter. (She’s said she didn’t work for ESPN, despite previous reports saying otherwise.) The Pre-Game combines her love for pop culture and sports in a way that once felt inaccessible to her in traditional media.
She’s not just a podcaster, though. When she’s not behind the mic, taking acting classes or making her New York Fashion Week debut, Kayla Nicole is also busy elevating her wellness brand Tribe Therepē, where she shares her workouts and the workout equipment that helps her look chic while staying fit. She says the brand will add apparel to its line up in early 2026.
“Tribe Therepē has evolved into exactly what I have always envisioned. A community of women who care about being fit not just for the aesthetic, but for their mental and emotional well-being too. It’s grounded. It’s feminine. It’s strong,” she says. “And honestly, it's a reflection of where I am in my life right now. I feel so damn good - mentally, emotionally, and physically. And I am grateful to be in a space where I can pour that love and light back into the community that continues to pour into me.”
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image by Malcolm Roberson
Contentment. By definition, it’s the state of not only being “satisfied with what one is or has” but also “not wanting more or anything else.” And you know what? Although it might not be a popular aspiration of many, it is a sign of spiritual maturity on certain levels. After all, it is the Apostle Paul who once said, “Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content…” (Philippians 4:19 — NKJV).
Being content is about not complaining. Being content is about learning to be comfortable in your present circumstances. Being content is about choosing to find joy and fulfillment, on some level, and in some way, on a daily basis.
Personally, I dig all of this so much because when you have mastered true inner contentment, it creates stability, self-awareness, and a type of resilience that makes you…shoot, powerful beyond measure, if you ask me. Because when someone knows how to “find the good” and “make peace,” regardless of what is going on around them, they truly are unstoppable. Yeah, on so many levels, contentment is the ultimate life hack. It’s something that each and every one of us should aspire to become: completely and genuinely content.
Thanksgiving is basically moments away at this point. In preparation for that time of self-reflection, pour yourself a glass of wine, turn on some soft music, sit on your coach, and then ask yourself, “Am I content?” If you’re not sure (or you need the definition unpacked for you just a bit more), here are seven signs that you may not be…and yet, there is no time like the present to do something about it.
1. You’re Super Impatient
GiphyHonestly, putting another Scripture right here could be all that is needed in order to bring this point to a swift and abrupt end. Which one? I Corinthians 13, the Love Chapter, starts off with “Love is patient” (I Corinthians 13:4). Yeah, if you want to know if you love yourself and love yourself well, how patient are you…including with yourself? Throughout the years, I have shared one of my favorite definitions of "patient" in several different articles: “bearing provocation, annoyance, misfortune, delay, hardship, pain, etc., with fortitude and calm and without complaint, anger, or the like.” For me, it’s a blaring reminder that mastering patience isn’t just about waiting (more on that in a sec); it’s about waiting with grace.
Content people can do this because, on some level, they know how to apply the John Piper quote, "God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of three of them." Another way of looking at this is people who can wait well — without complaining or getting annoyed by delays or challenges in the meantime — get that in order for things to truly come together, there are lots of moving parts…some that they don’t even know about. And so, if they want the best outcome, yes, waiting well is oftentimes not just involved; it is required.
Impatient people don’t get any of this. That’s why they are so stressed out all of the time.
2. You’re Worried About Things You Can’t Control
GiphyThis. Past. Election. Chile. And then the cabinet that that man is putting together as we speak? I don’t even want to get my blood pressure up, expounding on it. Let me just pivot by adding one more Scripture — because it is beyond fitting: “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” (Matthew 6:34 — NKJV)
Although worrying is something that pretty much everyone does at one point or another, one of my favorite quotes on it is by an American humorist by the name of Erma Bombeck: “Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.” And really, when you stop to really think about worrying, isn’t that the truth? For one thing, all worrying does, by definition, is cause you to torment yourself by focusing on things that aren’t even going to happen (somewhere between 85-90 percent of the time, in fact; there is actually a science on that) or trying to control things that are beyond your control.
If being a worry wart is your internal struggle, my advice would be to look at life this way: If you’re worried that you’re about to get written up for getting to work late again, leave your house earlier — you can control that. On the other hand, if you’re worried that you’re going to get laid off before the holiday season ends, so long as you’ve been doing your best (which is also something that you can control), please put your energy elsewhere because that is something that you can’t control.
And I promise that when you choose to be calm and confident over worrying yourself to death, that can help you to manage what you can’t control so much easier. Oh, and your health will thank you, too, because worry is attached to things like insomnia, muscle tension, headaches, overeating, and drinking too much. All this over things that probably won’t happen in the first place? Yeah, sis…(choose to) relax.
And by choosing to chill out, there is some contentment that follows because you will see the good as much as, if not more than, the potential bad. Trust me.
3. The Past and/or Future Consume You
GiphyOn the heels of the Scripture that I just provided for the previous point, it also applies to this one. You know, back when I was doing some intentional research on forgiveness, I always appreciated the insight of author Gary Zukav: “Forgiveness is accepting that the past cannot change.” While this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t hold people accountable for what they have done, it does help you to be compassionate with those who are truly sorry (check out “Heads Up: It's NOT An Apology If An Amend Isn't Made”) because, no matter what has transpired between you and them, one thing they can’t do is go back into a time machine and change it.
And you know what? When it comes to the mistakes — or, let’s be real, sometimes they are conscious poor decisions — you have made, you can’t either. So, why let their misdeeds or your own consume you to the point of internally destroying you?
Then there’s the future. What if you get robbed? What if your mom gets cancer? What if your husband files for divorce? Girl, if you are caught up in the future that hasn’t even happened yet, you are definitely gonna drive yourself up the wall! And this is why so many mental health experts and platforms are all about encouraging individuals to live in the moment. You can do this by meditating, taking breaks from social media (and the news), journaling, doing things that you enjoy (instead of waiting to put them off), and resting.
Listen, one of the best things about choosing to only focus on the here and now is you can find little things about it to be content with — and that helps you to be/become more content overall.
4. You Always Think About Wanting More
GiphyAlthough it certainly wasn’t my plan for this piece to be so Scripture-heavy, I’ve got to flow with what immediately comes to mind and, for this point, the verse, “So are the ways of everyone who is greedy for gain; It takes away the life of its owners” (Proverbs 1:19 — NKJV) is it. And just what does it mean to be greedy? A greedy individual isn’t just low-key obsessed with getting and having more — please catch it — they are also quite EAGER.
Eager folks also tend to be impatient. Eager folks are perceived by others as being very intense (and not in a good way). More times than not, eager folks haven’t really mastered how to take a moment to appreciate what they do have because all they care about is what’s next. And when you’re in a state of that kind of, well, anxiety…how could it not affect your quality of life? I mean, really.
And what if you read all of that and said, “I’m not greedy; I’m just ambitious” — listen, there is nothing wrong with having goals and wanting to obtain them. However, an ambitious individual knows how to find balance. If they get a promotion, they will schedule a vacation to celebrate it. If they just got a new car, they are not in a rush to get a new house until they can financially afford it. If they were just proposed to with a really nice ring, they aren’t hounding their new fiancé about setting a date within the next two weeks.
People who always want more, without taking the time to enjoy what they already have, are never going to be content. Why? Because there is always something else that you can want…even if you don’t need it or it really isn’t the time for it. Meanwhile, content people get that it’s a good thing to not go after everything all of the time; that it’s far wiser to embrace what is already before them — because some folks don’t even have…that.
5. You Compare Yourself to Others
GiphySomething that I actually get asked fairly often is, do I feel “some type of way” that I do so much work in the realm of marriage when I’ve never been married myself. The short answer is “absolutely not” because I know that I could’ve been married, a few times over, at this point; however, I am just as intentional about not wanting to be divorced as I am about being in a healthy marriage, not just “a marriage.”
I’m grateful to be in that head and heart space too; otherwise, I would be out here comparing myself to other people — and there is nothing good, healthy, wise, profitable, or beneficial about doing that. In fact, science isn’t a fan of playing the “keeping up with the Joneses” game, either.
According to science, that can ultimately do things like lower your self-esteem, cause you to only see the bad/negative things in your world (in comparison to other people), and it can jack up your perception of what’s really going on with other people. For instance, if you’re 33 and comparing yourself to your friends who are already married and parents, you might want to talk to them about what their day-to-day, beyond their IG posts, is like.
Because while prayerfully, their life is filled with many blessings, if they are being totally honest with you, they will also share that you’ve got some “pros” to your life too (honey, there are some real benefits to being single; check out “If You're Not In Love With Being Single, Ask Yourself These 6 Questions.,” “10 Bona Fide Benefits Of Being Single,” and “10 Words That'll Make You Totally Rethink The Word 'Single'”). Content people get that every season does — because it’s true.
6. You Don’t Verbalize Gratitude Often
GiphyThere is someone in my world who I actually try to avoid as much as possible. It’s not that she’s not smart, and honestly, she’s one of the funniest individuals that I’ve ever known (and I’ve known her for most of my adult life). It’s just that…she is always wanting something, and I find that to make her a very draining individual. Lawd, even as I am typing all of this out, I’m trying to recall a time when I’ve heard her say, “thank you” for something (no joke), let alone express any form of genuine gratitude. She’s just got such a sense of entitlement that whatever she does receive, she thinks she’s owed and what she doesn’t have, she believes that something is wrong if it hasn’t arrived yet. Geeze, what a horrible type of existence.
You don’t have to take my word for it either because there is plenty of data out here to support that people who don’t take the time to be grateful for what they have ended up being unhappy, more stressed out, in more physical pain (yes, literally) and definitely more negative than everyone else — which would explain why people don’t like hanging out with them as much.
So, since this is the time when gratitude is the theme of the season, think about what you are grateful for when it comes to what you’ve accomplished this year, then write it down and post it up somewhere. Then, as far as the individuals, for whom you are grateful for — send them a handwritten note, get them a gift card to their favorite coffee shop, or even just call to tell them.
One of the most beautiful things about being in a state of contentment is it reminds you of a lot of what you already have. It really is enough…for now…in this very moment.
7. Being (and Living) Satisfied Is a Foreign Concept to You
Giphy“Tubi movies” really is a complete sentence. LOL. And yes, sometimes, when I’m taking a writing break, I will check out some of the most…I-wouldn’t-normally ones, just to lend my support. In walks Never Satisfied with its own self-explanatory meaning. Y’all, it really is oh so true that there are folks out here dealing with some unpredictable and sometimes even truly dire consequences — and it’s all because they didn’t know how to sit down somewhere and learn how to be satisfied with the people, places, things, and ideas that they already have.
That said, I am indeed a quotes gal, and one of my favorites on the topic of satisfaction is by actor Christopher Reeve: “Success is finding satisfaction in giving a little more than you take,” and although I don’t do what I’m about to do often (because I try to take Matthew 6:1-4 very literally and seriously), I’m going to illustrate what he said about satisfaction by sharing a recent situation.
This past week, a nurse practitioner (I prefer those to doctors) diagnosed me with wrist tendonitis for the first time in my life. If you knew how many keystrokes that I do a day, you’d probably be shocked that it took this long. Anyway, as I was waiting in line to get a prescription, a young Black man was basically freaking out because his insurance was refusing to cover his own meds. According to what he was telling the pharmacist, he always only pays $5; however, this time, they were charging $62, he simply didn’t have it, and the insurance company was not picking up.
As I watched him shaking and sweating while saying that he really needed it today and fretting while talking to his mom on the phone, I offered to cover it — and after going back and forth with him for about three minutes, I did. In my mind, although I didn’t plan on spending about $85 (total) that day, the little inconvenience that it was costing me was nothing in comparison to how much it was going to benefit him — I could tell from how he and his mother reacted (even the pharmacist mouthed “thank you so much”), and that is what made it money well spent.
To help someone who had no way of helping themselves in the moment? That brought me a lot of satisfaction because it’s nice to lighten someone’s load while leaving it to karma to handle it. ALL OF IT.
And that’s why I thought it was best to wrap all of this up with a reminder that being satisfied is being content. And when you can be so satisfied with your life that you want to help others? That is a level of contentment that is truly unmatched because you start looking for ways to bless others simply so that they can feel just as content as you do.
____
Our culture? It really is never satisfied, which explains why a lot of people are so miserable. SMDH. You don’t have to be like the masses, though. This Thanksgiving, please purpose in your mind (and heart) to be(come) more content. It will make you a rare gem that benefits everyone and everything around you.
Including yourself, sis. No doubt about it.
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Featured image by Shutterstock
Originally published on November 28, 2024