#BlackMenDontCheat Is Trending On Twitter, Here's Why
In 2000, Shaggy released "It Wasn't Me". In 2004, Usher dropped "Confessions" (Part I and II.) And in 2019, Lil Duval and Charlamagne tha God released their viral hit single, "Black Men Don't Cheat" that seeks to reclaim the narrative of black men in romantic relationships from here on out.
Since the song's release, #BlackMenDon'tCheat has become the #1 trending topic on Twitter and sparked a wholesome conversation about Black men in faithful relationships, and their responses are the best thing you'll see all day. One user wrote:
"I've been with my 👸🏾 [Queen] for 12 wonderful years... And never once stepped out. Why get a dollar menu burger when I got Filet Mignon at home... Ya diiiiig."
Although this uplifting message-turned-viral hashtag has garnered a lot of attention, many of us can't help but acknowledge the history of Black men and their very public infidelities. So are we supposed to forget about Tristan, Kobe, Kevin, and Wendy Williams' soon-to-be ex-husband? If you ask 40-year-old radio host Charlamagne, who has been married to his wife since 2014, the answer is yeah, sis. On today's edition of Donkey of the Day, the South Carolina-born radio host addressed critics of what he calls the Faithful Black Man Association:
"Listen, I'm not here to change your mind. Because one thing about evolution that is my growth is that it doesn't depend if someone believes in it or not."
He made a powerful point that when it comes to men who have been unfaithful, just like drug addiction or alcoholism, recovery is possible. Just because someone made an unfavorable decision in the past, doesn't mean that all men should be barred from redemption.
Charlamagne also iterated the fact that the focus of his message is specific and intentional. He can't speak for Ray Ray broke ass who won't get off his mother's couch. He can't vouch for black boys who have made the conscious decision to commit to stunt their own growth. He continued:
"When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. Faithfulness is exactly what happens when you grow up."
Charlamagne also shared the real reason why most men are unfaithful and had a few words of advice for men who take infidelity lightly:
"When men cheat it's because they are trying to feed their egos. Nothing more, nothing less. That's little boy stuff. It's because something is empty inside of you and you're trying to fill up. But you don't realize when you are cheating, you are pouring from an empty cup into an empty cup with a hole at the bottom. So it's pointless. When you let ego drive it gets you absolutely nowhere. And when you let ego drive, you crash."
Charlamagne shared that he lent his vocals on this viral track in an attempt to rewrite the narrative of black men and hopes that other faithful Black men join the campaign; because when you cheat, you not only play your partner, you play yourself. He continued:
"All I'm simply telling my brothers is a man who isn't a slave to his sexual urges is a focused man. And a focused man is a dangerous man."
Check out the viral hit, "Black Men Don't Cheat" below!
Featured image by Robin L Marshall/Getty Images for AfroTech
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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It’s almost that time when the girlies are gonna be hopping in the chair to get the most popular style of the warmer seasons: goddess braids. Goddess braids are not just a hairstyle; they're a statement of elegance, power, and divine beauty. Whether you've recently adorned yourself with these stunning braids or are considering them, one thing remains certain: maintaining them is key to preserving their splendor. In this guide, we'll delve into the art of maintaining goddess braids, ensuring they remain flawless for longer periods.
Let’s start with some pro tips from Breanna Knights, a Brooklyn-based stylist with over a decade of experience in the beauty and fashion industry, specializing in goddess braids. She takes pride in maintaining the beauty and longevity of her clients' goddess braids, focusing on ensuring their scalp and curls remain healthy and hydrated.
Knights’ expertise extends to understanding the tension level, hydration needs, and proper cleansing techniques for goddess braids.
Hydration Is Key:
Moisture is essential for maintaining the integrity of your goddess braids. Use a lightweight leave-in conditioner or moisturizing spray to hydrate your scalp and braids. Pay attention to the ends of the braids, as they tend to be the driest part. Avoid heavy products that can weigh down the braids and cause buildup.
“To maintain neatness and longevity for goddess braid styles, I recommend treating the goddess hair just as you would your natural curls," Knights tells us. "This consists of putting up your hair at night in a bonnet. I also encourage using mousse or a bottle of water mixed with conditioner to make the curls bounce back. These two options depend on if the curls are a synthetic blend, or if it’s 100% human hair."
When it comes to keeping the goddess curls refreshed and hydrated, Knights’ favorite mousse brands include:
Bumble and bumble's Bb Curl Mousse
Bumble and bumble
Bumble and bumble's Bb Curl Mousse is a lightweight mousse that enhances curls with a blend of oils and butters, providing long-lasting volume, and bounce without stiffness.
The Vigorol Mousse Olive Oil
Amazon
The Vigorol Mousse Olive Oil is a fave amongst the girlies. Reviewers say, “Product works well taming frizzy curls as well smoothing natural hair, human hair, and synthetic crochet or individual braided hair. Adds shine without looking or feeling greasy.”
Knights also recommends using Creme of Nature Argan Oil Intensive Conditioning Treatment mixed with water in a spray bottle. “These products are sure to bring curls back to life," she adds.
If you’re looking for particular techniques or tricks to alleviate tension or discomfort often associated with wearing goddess braids, Knights shares that knotless goddess braids are usually done with less tension at the scalp, rather than traditional braids. “I highly suggest gauging tightness throughout your braiding session with your stylist. Should your braids end up too tight, one of my favorite go-to's is the Bumble and bumble’s Hairdresser's Invisible Oil. It provides a cool sensation on the scalp, without over saturating the scalp with oil,” Knights says.
The stylist also suggests a spray bottle with water to relieve tension. Additionally, less styling in the first few days of installing the braids to avoid scalp irritation.
Gentle Cleansing:
One topic that can be confusing when committing to goddess braids is the washing process. Should I wash my braids? How often should I wash them? We had all the questions, and Knights came with the tea. “Everyone’s wash [day] routine is different. To each client’s discernment, by weeks 3-4, if your scalp is itchy or shows signs of dandruff, it would be safe to wash your braids.
"I highly recommend paying more attention to the scalp rather than the braids itself. Keeping the braids up in a bun while saturating the scalp will keep the curls from matting and tangling during the wash process. After washing the scalp I recommend reapplying mousse and tying the hair down with a scarf to help tame any frizz that may occur after washing.”
Protect Your Crown:
One of the biggest keys to the longevity of goddess braids is having a braid bonnet and shower cap to ensure that the braids are dry. Invest in a satin or silk bonnet or scarf to protect your goddess braids while you sleep. Cotton pillowcases can cause friction, leading to frizz and flyaways. Additionally, tying your braids with a silk scarf can help preserve their shape and prevent them from unraveling.
“Combing through the loose curls with your fingers and having a routine to ensure that the hair isn't matting or entangling into one another can help with longevity as well," Knights shares. "The same way you’d care for your curls after a successful wash day would also promote the longevity for any 'goddess' style!”
Courtesy
Regular Touch-ups:
As your natural hair grows, your goddess braids may begin to loosen or develop new growth around the edges. Schedule regular touch-up appointments with your hairstylist to re-braid the edges and ensure a seamless look. Avoid leaving braids in for too long, as this can cause tension on the scalp and lead to breakage.
Minimize Manipulation:
While it's tempting to constantly touch and style your goddess braids, excessive manipulation can lead to frizz and premature loosening. Limit the use of styling tools and refrain from pulling or tugging on the braids. Embrace the natural beauty of your braids and allow them to flourish with minimal interference.
Nourish from Within:
Maintaining healthy hair starts from within. Ensure you're consuming a balanced diet rich in vitamins, minerals, and hydration to promote hair growth and vitality. Incorporate foods such as fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and plenty of water into your daily routine for optimal hair health.
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