In 2000, Shaggy released "It Wasn't Me". In 2004, Usher dropped "Confessions" (Part I and II.) And in 2019, Lil Duval and Charlamagne tha God released their viral hit single, "Black Men Don't Cheat" that seeks to reclaim the narrative of black men in romantic relationships from here on out.
Since the song's release, #BlackMenDon'tCheat has become the #1 trending topic on Twitter and sparked a wholesome conversation about Black men in faithful relationships, and their responses are the best thing you'll see all day. One user wrote:
"I've been with my 👸🏾 [Queen] for 12 wonderful years... And never once stepped out. Why get a dollar menu burger when I got Filet Mignon at home... Ya diiiiig."
Although this uplifting message-turned-viral hashtag has garnered a lot of attention, many of us can't help but acknowledge the history of Black men and their very public infidelities. So are we supposed to forget about Tristan, Kobe, Kevin, and Wendy Williams' soon-to-be ex-husband? If you ask 40-year-old radio host Charlamagne, who has been married to his wife since 2014, the answer is yeah, sis. On today's edition of Donkey of the Day, the South Carolina-born radio host addressed critics of what he calls the Faithful Black Man Association:
"Listen, I'm not here to change your mind. Because one thing about evolution that is my growth is that it doesn't depend if someone believes in it or not."
He made a powerful point that when it comes to men who have been unfaithful, just like drug addiction or alcoholism, recovery is possible. Just because someone made an unfavorable decision in the past, doesn't mean that all men should be barred from redemption.
Charlamagne also iterated the fact that the focus of his message is specific and intentional. He can't speak for Ray Ray broke ass who won't get off his mother's couch. He can't vouch for black boys who have made the conscious decision to commit to stunt their own growth. He continued:
"When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. Faithfulness is exactly what happens when you grow up."
Charlamagne also shared the real reason why most men are unfaithful and had a few words of advice for men who take infidelity lightly:
"When men cheat it's because they are trying to feed their egos. Nothing more, nothing less. That's little boy stuff. It's because something is empty inside of you and you're trying to fill up. But you don't realize when you are cheating, you are pouring from an empty cup into an empty cup with a hole at the bottom. So it's pointless. When you let ego drive it gets you absolutely nowhere. And when you let ego drive, you crash."
Charlamagne shared that he lent his vocals on this viral track in an attempt to rewrite the narrative of black men and hopes that other faithful Black men join the campaign; because when you cheat, you not only play your partner, you play yourself. He continued:
"All I'm simply telling my brothers is a man who isn't a slave to his sexual urges is a focused man. And a focused man is a dangerous man."
Check out the viral hit, "Black Men Don't Cheat" below!
Featured image by Robin L Marshall/Getty Images for AfroTech
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
'Bel-Air' Actress Jazlyn Martin On Her Ongoing Identity Crisis And Its Influence On Her Creative Journey
Jazlyn Martin is a triple-threat performer known most for her role as Jackie on Peacock’sBel-Air. Her character’s fiery personality and questionable decisions have led to a few shocking moments in the series and quite a bit of convo on social media.
Now, I’ll be honest: as an avid TV-lover, I was well-prepared to hop on Zoom and jump into all the chatter around Bel-Air and her characters’ decisions. But after listening to her new EP Identity Crisis, I knew there was a lot more to talk about as well. During this exclusive conversation with xoNecole, Jazlyn Martin delved into the challenging journey she’s faced surrounding her identity, newfound fame, and family influence, and how it all plays a part in her art. Check it out!
xoNecole: So I know that your father is in the entertainment world, but when did you realize you shared the same passion?
Jazlyn Martin: I think it was very early on. I was a child who was full of attitude and fearlessness that would go after anything I wanted. I believe seeing my dad pursue music made me realize it was possible. I just had this hunger and fire, and my parents consciously fed and nurtured that - they are always all super supportive of whatever I do. So very, very early on, I was like, I'm meant to do this. And I just was like, I'm a star, and I know I'm a star.
xoN: Actually, let's talk about your family. What are some of your most important values, and how have your family and heritage played a part in shaping those values?
Jazlyn: I mean, my mom is like an angel; she's so graceful and kind, and I've had to work hard to get there. When I was young, I was very abrasive, headstrong, and stubborn. Whereas my mom gives an immense amount of grace in the way she carries herself. I had to learn that.
I think being strong is something I’ve always had. My parents always joke that they don't know where my personality came from. Because my dad is shy and timid and my mom is kind, and I'm a fireball. But my Dad always asked the important industry questions like, “Why do you want to do this?” And that instilled some purpose into me. It really carried me to keep going because it's so easy to be discouraged in this field, but that drive has helped me push through all of the challenges.
xoN: I bet. I have such a respect for actors and the way you all navigate the industry. Speaking of, let’s dig into “Bel-Air.” Were you a fan of the show? Did you have to go back and watch the episodes?
Jazlyn: So I actually did watch the show which is crazy because sometimes I don’t. I saw it was a reboot and was like, ‘Oh no, not another one.’ But I watched the first three episodes, realized how good it was, and ended up watching the whole season. I became a fan, and then a few months later, I booked the role!
I think the imagination is such a beautiful and powerful tool, and I feel like if you create something in your mind, it happens. It's a crazy thing, but I really just created Jackie's world - the house she grew up in, her parents leaving her, and everything. I created why she fell in love with dance. I really came at it from a human approach. If I see it, then the audience can see it.
xoN: Yeah, background plays into so much of how we deal with things, how we interact with people, and everything. And I feel like Jackie gets a lot of backlash. Like, we’ve all had a “Jackie Moment” to be real.
Jazlyn: She gets so much backlash! I just encourage people to give her grace and see the God in her because I do think she tells a lot of Black and brown girls' stories. People project on her, saying she’s too ratchet or hood, and I’m like does that mean she’s not loveable?
We have to be careful of what’s said and put out because Jackie has gone through things that I've never had to go through. The fact that she's alive and still highly functioning is a blessing. So what if she gets a little messy? I love her. Because she’s helped me extend empathy to people I don't necessarily want to or don't think deserve to have it. But she's 17, she's figuring it out, and she doesn't have parents. Like, that's such a huge factor.
"We have to be careful of what’s said and put out because Jackie has gone through things that I've never had to go through. The fact that she's alive and still highly functioning is a blessing. So what if she gets a little messy? I love her."
xoN: You mentioned how your character is viewed, which digs a bit into identity. So I want to talk a little bit about some of the emotional songs on your EP “Identity Crisis.” What inspired the track “Perfect?”
Jazlyn: When I was creating “Perfect,” I already had the EP title. So I kind of mapped out, like, the different conflicts I had in my head and categorized them into seven songs, and so one of my identity crises was being perfect. Because I feel like a lot of men tend to put women on pedestals. They're expected to be perfect - especially when you’re in the limelight. You know, you can't slip up. You can't say the wrong thing. Cancel culture is such a huge thing. And I just wanted to encourage people to give people grace to be themselves because that's not an easy thing to do.
I just wanted to take down this facade that I’m perfect because I never pretended to be. I never wanted to be. I think that's something people have placed on me, that I have it all figured out, I think I just carry it well, but that doesn't mean it's not heavy. I just wanted to be very vulnerable and honest. I think people think “perfect” is a compliment, but I think it's a cage because it doesn't allow room for error. It doesn't allow for you to be human and mess up and fail and take risks. So I just wanted to encourage grace.
xoN: Do you ever feel like you went through an identity crisis?
Jazlyn: I go through one constantly. Growing up, I didn't really have one. But I think as you get older and more aware and cognitive, you know how the world goes, and the world starts telling you who you are, instead of you deciding who you are. And I feel like being mixed played a big role in that, not feeling Black or Mexican enough. I wanted to belong to both worlds but didn’t so I was just “other.” That was an identity crisis in itself.
Also, being introduced to a level of fame has been interesting, too. I think we all go through identity crises all the time because we’re evolving and changing. It’s beautiful, but it’s also scary; you see yourself this one way, and then something happens, and there’s a shift. So yeah, I think it’s something we all go through but no one talks about.
"I think as you get older and more aware and cognitive, you know how the world goes, and the world starts telling you who you are, instead of you deciding who you are. And I feel like being mixed played a big role in that, not feeling Black or Mexican enough. I wanted to belong to both worlds but didn’t so I was just 'other.'"
xoN: I love that. And I know Hispanic Heritage Month is coming up, and you'll be speaking at the New York Latino Film Festival. Talk to me about what that moment means to you and what you hope to bring to the event. *Editor’s note: The interview was conducted before Hispanic Heritage Month began.
Jazlyn: I’m bringing some Afro-Latino-ness! I always grew up seeing Latinos being represented in a very specific way—very Spanish, not very Indigenous looking. So I'm really excited to bring the Black experience, with the Latino experience, to the stage because that's something a lot of people don't know exists.
People are always like, “Are you Black or Latina?” Well, I'm both! We were just dropped off in different parts. I’m excited to speak on that and highlight how prevalent anti-Blackness is within Latino communities. A lot of Afro-Latinos have faced an identity crisis because of it, including myself. It sometimes feels like you’re supposed to hate the other half of who you are.
For me, I held onto that little Black girl inside. I refused to let her go. And that’s what I want to represent when I speak—resilience and acceptance of our full selves. I’m also looking forward to meeting fellow Latino people, especially Afro-Latinos, and sharing our stories. It’s not a narrative that gets much attention, and I’m excited to represent.
xoN: I’m excited for you! Finally, with all the praise and recognition you’re receiving now, what has it been like to transition from working in music, dance, and acting to now being in the spotlight? How have you embraced this new level of fame?
Jazlyn: Um, it's overwhelming. I think that's the best word. Sometimes, I'm joyful, because I'm giving back to the community. People resonate with Jackie's stories and see themselves in her, which I think is the biggest compliment to me. But then sometimes, you know, I feel sad because I'm like, ‘Damn, I'm not doing enough,’ like I should be doing more. It's crazy, the industry is so fast-paced that you don't really try to celebrate wins. It's just a transition, an identity crisis of the like.
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'It's A Sexy Show': Aldis Hodge Talks Iconic Role In 'Cross' At CultureCon Ahead of Prime Video Premiere
The culture’s latest heartthrob owns his main character energy as he prepares to lead in Prime Video’s Cross.
During the 2024 CultureCon event held in New York City at the top of October, Aldis Hodge hit the stage to discuss everything connected to his main character era as eager fans listened in, counting down the days to the premiere of his new series.
Hodge, known for his iconic roles in One Night in Miami, Underground, Straight Outta Compton, and a host of other hit projects, will become Alex Cross, the “brilliant detective and forensic psychologist renowned for his uncanny ability to probe the darkest recesses of killers and their victims,” according to a press release shared with xoNecole.
Moderated by Chris Witherspoon, the panel during this year’s CultureCon featured Hodge and his co-star for Cross (and fellow hearth throb) Isaiah Mustafa.
After a special screening for the community builders, creatives, tastemakers, and everyone in between, the trio discussed the theme for the forthcoming show, how it pays homage to the original book series by James Patterson but is its entirely own story, and much more.
Following the conversations, guests could party with Hodge at an exclusive after-party.
“Cross is set to push the boundaries of suspense and storytelling, crafted by the visionary Ben Watkins, who serves as both showrunner and executive producer,” read an official statement for this show.
Photo by Aaron J. Thornton/WireImage
“His creation promises a complex and twisted narrative that will keep audiences on the edge of their seats. Joining Hodge in this high-octane thriller is a talented ensemble cast including Isaiah Mustafa, Juanita Jennings, Alona Tal, and Samantha Walkes, each adding depth to this multifaceted drama.”
During an interview with Blavity’sShadow & Act this summer, Hodge opened up about playing the iconic character previously serving as the protagonist in the James Patterson novel series dedicated to Alex Cross.
“I’m excited because this is a completely different Cross than anyone has seen before,” said Hodge. “You get to explore every element of what makes cinema entertaining. It’s a sexy show. It’s a dangerous show. I feel like I’m stuck in the coolest psychological thriller ever. We get to explore all the facets of his life, his world, his manhood, family man, brotherhood, trying to explore new relationships, and what that means to him.”
He added, “This show goes there. It dives deep and I just love the fact that people are going to get something they do not expect.”
All eight episodes of Aldis Hodge as Alex Cross will premiere on Nov. 15 only on Prime Video.
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Feature image by Prince Williams/WireImage