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Diddy Finally Opens Up About The Real Reason He Didn't Marry Kim Porter

Celebrity News

Life can serve us some unexpected curveballs, one of the most spontaneous is death. In the past year, we've lost a number of our favorite celebrities and the people that we feel for the most are their families because as well all know, the death of a loved one is most painful to the living. The deaths of celebrities including but not limited to Nipsey Hussle and Kim Porter hit so close to home because we can empathize with the family, friends, and sweethearts that they left behind.

It was pronounced that Kim Porter's death was caused by pneumonia, or an infection of the lungs, after she died in her Los Angeles home last November. Kim's death took the internet by storm, prompting a number of celebrities to post tributes in her honor, one of these celebrities being her former partner and father of three of her children, Sean "P. Diddy" Combs.

It's a fact that you don't know what you've got until it's gone, and this was especially true for the "I'll Be Missing You" rapper/producer. Diddy recently reflected on this sentiment in an Instagram post. Under a nostalgic photo of him and his "Bonnie", he wrote:

"I remember Kim flying to see me on the set of can't nobody hold me down. She took like a 12 hour flight to LA and 3 hour ride to the desert. With no complaints. Was always ride or die. From day 1! I called her BONNIE AND I WAS CLYDE! This picture will go down in history as the first time I said she was MINE!!!! AND THE FIRST TIME I TOLD HER I LOVE HER, little did I know I was hers. Miss you BONNIE ❤️ and will forever. Maaaaan life is beautiful to have had these experiences. Love you baby. @ladykp 🖤"

After posting the photo, the star received a whirlwind of backlash from fans who felt that he had done too little too late. One user even made the point that the picture that Diddy posted was taken around the time that Diddy began his widely publicized relationship with Jennifer Lopez during an "off-season" in Kim and his relationship. Despite the immense amount of speculation about Kim and Diddy's relationship, anyone with eyes can see that the couple had an unbreakable connection.

Sean Combs and his Georgia-born sweetheart met and began dating in the 90s when she was in a relationship with her first child, Quincy's, father, Al B. Sure and Diddy was still an A&R. In a 2006 interview with Essence, he explained:

"The first time I saw her, she was at the studio with her ex-boyfriend. I wasn't trying to holler at her or anything, but I was admiring her—her lips, her eyes, her mouth, her shape, her energy—and thinking, 'I wish I had a girl like that.'"

In this interview, Diddy also revealed that he had no real plans to marry Kim, even though he knew she deserved it.

"I know she deserves to get married, but I'm just not ready. It's not a reflection on how much I love Kim. It's that I'm just learning how to be a good boyfriend. When I'm finished with this step, I'll move on to the next."

During their 12-year on-and-off the relationship, Kim gave birth to a son, Christian Combs, and twin daughters, D'Lila Star, and Jessie James. Kim and Diddy split publicly in 2007 when she learned that he may have fathered a child outside of their relationship while she was pregnant with the twins, but they still remained close friends after the fact.

Instagram

It's clear that Diddy and Kim had a genuine love for each other, and marriage wouldn't have necessarily validated that connection, but when someone dies, nothing stings worse than the regret of what "could have been."

This leads us to a very important question that Diddy has finally given us all the answer to: If you loved her so deeply, why didn't you make a real commitment?

Instagram

The truth is, his inability to commit never really had much to do with Kim at all; he had to look inward for an answer:

"I wasn't ready and that's it. I'm ready now but it's too late. Don't be like me."

You heard it straight from the mogul's mouth, kids. Don't be Diddy. We're all guilty of ending a call on an unfavorable note, or procrastinating about mending old relationships. The untimely deaths of celebrities like Kim Porter and Nipsey Hussle remind us to tell the people we care about "I love you," as well as all of the other things we may need to get off our chests because tomorrow, it may be too late.

Nothing is promised, and this is especially true for the time we have to spend with the people we love. Like most relationships, Kim and Diddy's was imperfect, but it didn't make the love any less real. Rest in heaven Kim! Check out the gallery below to see a timeline of Diddy and Kim's lifetime of love.

Featured image by Peter Kramer/Getty Images.

ACLU By ACLUSponsored

Over the past four years, we grew accustomed to a regular barrage of blatant, segregationist-style racism from the White House. Donald Trump tweeted that “the Squad," four Democratic Congresswomen who are Black, Latinx, and South Asian, should “go back" to the “corrupt" countries they came from; that same year, he called Elizabeth Warren “Pocahontas," mocking her belief that she might be descended from Native American ancestors.

But as outrageous as the racist comments Trump regularly spewed were, the racially unjust governmental actions his administration took and, in the case of COVID-19, didn't take, impacted millions more — especially Black and Brown people.

To begin to heal and move toward real racial justice, we must address not only the harms of the past four years, but also the harms tracing back to this country's origins. Racism has played an active role in the creation of our systems of education, health care, ownership, and employment, and virtually every other facet of life since this nation's founding.

Our history has shown us that it's not enough to take racist policies off the books if we are going to achieve true justice. Those past policies have structured our society and created deeply-rooted patterns and practices that can only be disrupted and reformed with new policies of similar strength and efficacy. In short, a systemic problem requires a systemic solution. To combat systemic racism, we must pursue systemic equality.

What is Systemic Racism?

A system is a collection of elements that are organized for a common purpose. Racism in America is a system that combines economic, political, and social components. That system specifically disempowers and disenfranchises Black people, while maintaining and expanding implicit and explicit advantages for white people, leading to better opportunities in jobs, education, and housing, and discrimination in the criminal legal system. For example, the country's voting systems empower white voters at the expense of voters of color, resulting in an unequal system of governance in which those communities have little voice and representation, even in policies that directly impact them.

Systemic Equality is a Systemic Solution

In the years ahead, the ACLU will pursue administrative and legislative campaigns targeting the Biden-Harris administration and Congress. We will leverage legal advocacy to dismantle systemic barriers, and will work with our affiliates to change policies nearer to the communities most harmed by these legacies. The goal is to build a nation where every person can achieve their highest potential, unhampered by structural and institutional racism.

To begin, in 2021, we believe the Biden administration and Congress should take the following crucial steps to advance systemic equality:

Voting Rights

The administration must issue an executive order creating a Justice Department lead staff position on voting rights violations in every U.S. Attorney office. We are seeing a flood of unlawful restrictions on voting across the country, and at every level of state and local government. This nationwide problem requires nationwide investigatory and enforcement resources. Even if it requires new training and approval protocols, a new voting rights enforcement program with the participation of all 93 U.S. Attorney offices is the best way to help ensure nationwide enforcement of voting rights laws.

These assistant U.S. attorneys should begin by ensuring that every American in the custody of the Bureau of Prisons who is eligible to vote can vote, and monitor the Census and redistricting process to fight the dilution of voting power in communities of color.

We are also calling on Congress to pass the John Lewis Voting Rights Advancement Act to finally create a fair and equal national voting system, the cause for which John Lewis devoted his life.

Student Debt

Black borrowers pay more than other students for the same degrees, and graduate with an average of $7,400 more in debt than their white peers. In the years following graduation, the debt gap more than triples. Nearly half of Black borrowers will default within 12 years. In other words, for Black Americans, the American dream costs more. Last week, Majority Leader Chuck Schumer and Sen. Elizabeth Warren, along with House Reps. Ayanna Pressley, Maxine Waters, and others, called on President Biden to cancel up to $50,000 in federal student loan debt per borrower.

We couldn't agree more. By forgiving $50,000 of student debt, President Biden can unleash pent up economic potential in Black communities, while relieving them of a burden that forestalls so many hopes and dreams. Black women in particular will benefit from this executive action, as they are proportionately the most indebted group of all Americans.

Postal Banking

In both low and high income majority-Black communities, traditional bank branches are 50 percent more likely to close than in white communities. The result is that nearly 50 percent of Black Americans are unbanked or underbanked, and many pay more than $2,000 in fees associated with subprime financial institutions. Over their lifetime, those fees can add up to as much as two years of annual income for the average Black family.

The U.S. Postal Service can and should meet this crisis by providing competitive, low-cost financial services to help advance economic equality. We call on President Biden to appoint new members to the Postal Board of Governors so that the Post Office can do the work of providing essential services to every American.

Fair Housing

Across the country, millions of people are living in communities of concentrated poverty, including 26 percent of all Black children. The Biden administration should again implement the 2015 Affirmatively Furthering Fair Housing rule, which required localities that receive federal funds for housing to investigate and address barriers to fair housing and patterns or practices that promote bias. In 1980, the average Black person lived in a neighborhood that was 62 percent Black and 31 percent white. By 2010, the average Black person's neighborhood was 48 percent Black and 34 percent white. Reinstating the Obama-era Fair Housing Rule will combat this ongoing segregation and set us on a path to true integration.

Congress should also pass the American Housing and Economic Mobility Act, or a similar measure, to finally redress the legacy of redlining and break down the walls of segregation once and for all.

Broadband Access

To realize broadband's potential to benefit our democracy and connect us to one another, all people in the United States must have equal access and broadband must be made affordable for the most vulnerable. Yet today, 15 percent of American households with school-age children do not have subscriptions to any form of broadband, including one-quarter of Black households (an additional 23 percent of African Americans are “smartphone-only" internet users, meaning they lack traditional home broadband service but do own a smartphone, which is insufficient to attend class, do homework, or apply for a job). The Biden administration, Federal Communications Commission, and Congress must develop and implement plans to increase funding for broadband to expand universal access.

Enhanced, Refundable Child Tax Credits

The United States faces a crisis of child poverty. Seventeen percent of all American children are impoverished — a rate higher than not just peer nations like Canada and the U.K., but Mexico and Russia as well. Currently, more than 50 percent of Black and Latinx children in the U.S. do not qualify for the full benefit, compared to 23 percent of white children, and nearly one in five Black children do not receive any credit at all.

To combat this crisis, President Biden and Congress should enhance the child tax credit and make it fully refundable. If we enhance the child tax credit, we can cut child poverty by 40 percent and instantly lift over 50 percent of Black children out of poverty.

Reparations

We cannot repair harms that we have not fully diagnosed. We must commit to a thorough examination of the impact of the legacy of chattel slavery on racial inequality today. In 2021, Congress must pass H.R. 40, which would establish a commission to study reparations and make recommendations for Black Americans.

The Long View

For the past century, the ACLU has fought for racial justice in legislatures and in courts, including through several landmark Supreme Court cases. While the court has not always ruled in favor of racial justice, incremental wins throughout history have helped to chip away at different forms of racism such as school segregation ( Brown v. Board), racial bias in the criminal legal system (Powell v. Alabama, i.e. the Scottsboro Boys), and marriage inequality (Loving v. Virginia). While these landmark victories initiated necessary reforms, they were only a starting point.

Systemic racism continues to pervade the lives of Black people through voter suppression, lack of financial services, housing discrimination, and other areas. More than anything, doing this work has taught the ACLU that we must fight on every front in order to overcome our country's legacies of racism. That is what our Systemic Equality agenda is all about.

In the weeks ahead, we will both expand on our views of why these campaigns are crucial to systemic equality and signal the path this country must take. We will also dive into our work to build organizing, advocacy, and legal power in the South — a region with a unique history of racial oppression and violence alongside a rich history of antiracist organizing and advocacy. We are committed to four principles throughout this campaign: reconciliation, access, prosperity, and empowerment. We hope that our actions can meet our ambition to, as Dr. King said, lead this nation to live out the true meaning of its creed.

What you can do:
Take the pledge: Systemic Equality Agenda
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Featured image by Shutterstock

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