What Self-Care Looks Like To Model & On-Air Host Kamie Crawford
In xoNecole's Finding Balance, we profile boss women making boss moves in the world and in their respective industries. We talk to them about their business, their life, and most of all, what they do to find balance in their busy lives.
Kamie Crawford is more than meets the eye.
Her first-ever wave came in the form of competing in the Miss Maryland Teen USA pageant. There, she represented the state of Maryland and ended up walking away from the night with a crown. Kamie also did so while making history as the first contestant from Maryland to ever win the competition. "I applied and the rest was history!" she exclaimed in a conversation with xoNecole. "Being Miss Teen USA was an awesome experience, but I got what I needed from it and moved forward with my life and career."
In addition to being a diverse shade and size in the fashion world as a model, Kamie has been broadening her reach and expanding her talents as an on-air host; a passion she's been nurturing into her purpose since her late teens. Most recently, she's gained credits with the E! Network and MTV's Catfish underneath her hosting belt, where her compassionate and "real recognize real" persona made her an instant fan-favorite among the lineup of guest hosts that have co-piloted Nev's show since long-time co-host's Max Joseph's departure.
Despite the yes's she's acquired along her journey, the pathway to being Kamie Crawford hasn't been one without uncertainty or doubts. "Before I made the transition, I had never felt more lost. I didn't know where my career was going, but I made the decision to put it all in God's hands and manifest TF out of everything. Once I did that, I got the email about Catfish. Sometimes you have to realize that there is already a divine purpose for your life – so while you're busy making plans, you have to know in your heart that the path has already been paved for you, you just have to follow it where it leads."
Since then, abundance has manifested by the droves and it all started with taking a leap of faith and transitioning to life in LA. Nowadays, Kamie is a master of her own destiny and is finding time to balance brand deals and TV segments with SoulCycle and Netflix and chill. Here's how.
What does the average day/week look like for you?
Every week is different, which keeps it exciting. I usually have one or two "admin days" out of the week to strictly just answer emails, send invoices for brand deals, work out contracts for upcoming projects, plan out potential TV segment ideas or jot down some goals. If I'm filming during the week (like I am right now), I have to block off days for travel/filming or time to coordinate looks for on-camera. I also have days set aside for taking meetings or running errands and because I'm a Scorpio, me-time is essential!
What are your mornings like? How do you wind down at night?
Mornings, I will admit, are not my strong suit. If I'm not filming early, I like to sleep as much as I can. I try to wake up around 9am and get my day started, walk my dog, get my Starbucks fix in. Sometimes, I work out, sometimes I don't. I'm working on making my mornings more productive! At night I love to catch up on Netflix or Ru Paul's Drag Race, hang out with my boyfriend and our dog. Maybe drink some wine – it all depends on the day!
What do you find to be the most hectic part of your week?
Mondays and Tuesdays are usually the craziest just because there are so many emails coming in, but if I'm filming – I'm usually busy from Thursday to Monday. This is why I keep a physical and digital planner!
Do you practice any types of self-care?
SoulCycle is my self-care. I also just started boxing which is awesome, but outside of fitness I love to just detach. If I'm feeling stressed, I'll take a few hours and just be with myself and my own thoughts. I don't answer anyone's emails or calls and I regroup.
"If I'm feeling stressed, I'll take a few hours and just be with myself and my own thoughts. I don't answer anyone's emails or calls and I regroup."
What are some rituals you swear by in the name of self-care?
A scalding hot shower, a glass of wine and some great Chinese food usually does the trick for me!
How do you find balance with:
Love/Marriage?
I feel really lucky because my boyfriend and I both work in the entertainment industry. He's more behind the scenes, but he's always traveling with clients and we're coincidentally in the same place at the same time. One time I had to travel to Phoenix, AZ to film while he was in the same city for a music festival! It's always been like that and it really helps. It's also just great being with someone who gets the industry and my frustrations overall – we're constantly planning together and running ideas by each other, but even we have to set aside time with no phones and just enjoy one another.
Friends?
My best friends and I talk every single day. Group chats are a lifesaver! We're always connected digitally, but seeing each other often is a struggle just because we live in different areas now. Whenever we're in the same town though, it's like we never left. Low-maintenance friendships are key for me. We have to be able to pick right back up where we left off, even if we haven't seen each other in a few months! They're super busy and successful too, so we're all on the same page.
Exercise/Health? Do you ever detox?
I have spurts of being really super active and then I won't work out for like a week. I want to be better at that but if I'm not as active, I'm usually doing a better job at watching what foods I'm indulging in. I've done cleanses before, but I'm not really a fan. I own my faults and just try to make them better, but I don't like to put too much pressure on myself in that arena.
"Low-maintenance friendships are key for me. We have to be able to pick right back up where we left off, even if we haven't seen each other in a few months!"
When you are going through a bout of uncertainty, or feeling stuck, how do you handle it?
A good cry helps! I can be a perfectionist at times and a strong manifestor, so when things don't happen as soon as I'd like, or at all, I can feel down. I allow myself to feel crappy and then I move on. I don't believe in wallowing for too long because things can always be worse and I am very blessed. If it's something I can change, I fix it. If it's out of my hands, I give to God and go to sleep!
What does success mean to you?
Meeting my personal and professional goals. Having people by my side who support me and love me for who I am and just being a good human. All the money in the world can't replace kindness and genuine happiness.
Ultimately, how do you find balance?
Prayer and downtime. Clearing my brain completely and then starting fresh with new ideas and a new perspective.
For more of Kamie, follow her on Instagram.
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
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The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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Remote Work Burnout Is Real: How To Set Boundaries And Truly Decompress
When working a remote job, it's important to set boundaries with your time. Burnout for remote workers is definitely real. It's easy to get caught up overworking and stressing, which defeats the whole purpose of working a remote job. Working from home (or anywhere in the world) provides the benefits of flexibility, autonomy, and peace of mind, so if you're feeling the total opposite of those things, action must be taken to find balance.
Here are a few tips to ensure you're having the best remote work experience and you're able to truly tap into why you chose to pursue remote work in the first place:
1. Set an alarm for when it's truly time to stop working.
If you're paid to work a certain number of hours, set reminders of when those hours are complete for the day. It's very important that when you do this, you're managing your time working at home well, and getting tasks done in an efficient way. Once that alarm goes off, no more responding to emails or finishing up projects. It's done and gone. Once that alarm goes off, stop what you're doing and take a walk, go out for happy hour drinks, or plan to attend that networking event so you'll feel a bit less isolated working remote.
After being remote working for almost a decade and finding myself still feeling the same Sunday Scaries as I'd felt while working a 9-to-5, this step really helped me to not only set boundaries with myself but with the people I work for. They'd know they wouldn't get any interaction from me after kindly signing off on Slack because I literally would shut down my computer for the day and not open it again until it was time to basically "clock in" the next day.
2. Schedule your "me time" on your calendar as if it's an important meeting.
Self-care appointments are indeed important, so give them the respect they deserve. Block out times in your calendar when you are fully off to do something that affirms how much you care about yourself and your own well-being. It could be something as simple as a morning walk or as grand as a spa date. Put it on your calendar and deliberately take prioritizing balance seriously.
I now have times and dates blocked off where I do not take meetings, and I instead do things that I love. As a remote worker, you can have a conversation with your employer or manager and find ways to make the time you have work not only for them but for you as well.
And no, this is not a "lunch hour" situation. Your lunch hour should be all about satiation and nutrition, not squeezing in appointments. Find ways to set aside time for fun or other wellness activities that are non-negotiable, even if it starts soon after your work day is over.
3. Create a peaceful playlist, set a timer, and meditate.
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These have been a game-changer for me over the years. Whether it's on Spotify, Amazon Music, or YouTube, I often listen to gospel, motivational speeches, ambient noise, prayers, or jazz and zone out during lunch or another short break during my work day. I set a timer to ensure I'm not getting too caught up in the relaxation, and I take in good vibrations. Listen to an audiobook or find some other auditory distraction to get you out of your own head, off of the computer, and into some peace and relaxation.
It's easy to feel isolated and get into an overworking habit when you're working from home (or even from paradise, as I often do---with a beach as my office) because you're able to simply get ish done. If you're like me, once you're in a groove, you can literally sit and crank out ideas, tie up loose ends of a project, answer 100 emails, and still have time to spare to do even more work. Before you know it, that "groove" has turned into a nonstop session of staring into a screen, and you've totally forgotten to breathe, take breaks, or to be sure you're using your time wisely.
These peaceful breaks re-center your mind and offer a reminder that while remote work is a privilege and pleasure, we must be mindful of balance.
4. Be deliberate about making plans with loved ones, acquaintances and friends.
When working remote, it's easy to become a bit of a hermit, especially when you're super-comfy in your loungewear, and your routine is pretty much set. You don't really want to get too comfortable with this because as much as remote work can feel quite lonely, you want to be sure you're not contributing to the loneliness by default.
Invite your friends out for coffee, lunch, or brunch. Start taking the steps to get social, and find other remote workers to connect with via coworking spaces or events. I once found myself feeling super anxious and out of it and realized it was because I was spending too much time working alone and not nurturing relationships with others.
Solitude is a great thing, within reason, and while one might loathe the annoying things that come with office work---like chatty cubicle mates, a manager constantly over your shoulder, or commuting costs---we still need to interact with others for our mental sanity and career advancement. Decompression isn't always done alone, and sometimes we need to vent, find support, or at least be able to talk to others in person, outside of a Slack message or Zoom call.
5. Use the tech tools at your fingertips.
Use that ScreenTime option on your iPhone to track how much time you're spending using your Slack, email, or other remote work-related apps. Download a few good productivity apps that remind you to take breaks, be mindful of your time, and schedule wellness appointments like 24Me or Clockify.
I love to work smart, not hard, since life is already hard enough. If there are ways to use tech to force me into better managing my self-care and time, I'm definitely here for them.
6. Talk to a therapist or coach to figure out how to lean more heavily into self-care.
Sometimes we can have all we need to truly tap into decompression and balance but we might feel overwhelmed with figuring out just what that looks like for us. This is where a good therapist or coach comes in. Even if you choose to only talk with them just to come up with some effective tools for creating balance in your life, it's a win.
These professionals can help remind you why you need balance, pinpoint triggers, and suggest ways you can tailor a plan for your own well-being that works for your unique needs and lifestyle.
For some of us, taking steps to balance out our work-from-home life includes really unpacking how and why we might need to make some adjustments and improvements when it comes to systems and boundaries and pinpointing what truly makes us happy.
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