From 9-To-5 To Self-Made: How To Transition Into Self-Employment Without Going Broke
Taking a leap from working for a company to self-employment is not easy, but if you're thinking about doing it, you'll be among many other ambitious women. According to Forbes, self-employment rates went up among us post-pandemic. Women represent at least 40 percent of all self-employed professionals, an increase from 34 percent in 2016.
According to other research, among women-owned businesses, 90 percent have no employees. Ninety-six percent of Black-owned businesses, overall, have no employees. Self-employment has also been deemed an “essential part of the economic stability of mothers,” with women launching their own sole proprietorships and side hustles (or freelancing their skills to brands and companies) in order to have time and earnings flexibility.
Women left their jobs in droves during the Great Resignation, and although some have returned to work, many, like myself, are still riding self-employment until the wheels fall off. Leaving a stable job with benefits to go off on your own, you might be thinking, "Well, how will I pay my bills? I've got a lifestyle to uphold."
Here's what has helped me and many others in planning to make an exit from a 9-to-5 to pursue dreams of working for ourselves:
1. Tighten up that spending and map out an adjusted budget for your future self-employment life.
This is almost like budgeting backward. Think about what you'd like your life to look like once you've gone off on your own, and figure out a ballpark figure of how much that lifestyle will cost. Be sure to note the non-negotiables first (like childcare, housing, food, education, social life, church, and other expenses already part of your budget that you refuse to compromise on).
Get clear on why you're pursuing self-employment in the first place (i.e., to travel full-time, downsize in order to live simpler, focus on mental health, prioritize stay-at-home parenting, or retire early) and what lifestyle aspects might change because of your choice.
This will help inform the budget you put together that will prompt actions to lead to your tomorrow, not those that are sustaining you today.
Do you need to fast from Amazon purchases for six months to a year in order to save up? Do you need to purchase more insurance policies? Do you need to set aside funds to invest in a website or get more training in order to step fully into self-employment? Do you need to move to a smaller home, get a roommate, or decline more than a few happy hours in order to have enough money to feel confident in leaving your job?
2. Set a number and a deadline for when you'll resign so that you can follow a deliberate savings plan to reach a specific goal.
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If you want to have a certain quality of life once self-employed, figure out that dream number and then work toward achieving that (or at least build habits that will get you to that number once you're self-employed for good.)
And set a deadline for leaving in order to plan savings accordingly. For example, if I were working a 9-to-5 and needed $20,000 in order to feel secure enough to quit my job (with the consideration that I might possibly be without steady income for the first six months and need to cover basic bills during that time), I'd need to save up little over $3,300 a month for six months in order to do that.
You can break down the cost in months, weeks, or years, depending on your deadline, timeline to resign, and financial obligations you'll still need to cover once you quit your job.
3. Talk with a financial adviser, bank rep, or accountant to help you crunch some numbers.
If you find the thought of leaving a job and going the self-employed route stressful when it comes to financially planning the shift, get some help. Many credit unions and banks offer resources and professionals who can let you know what shifts you might need to make financially or give you a real sense of how you're already spending money so that you can adjust your budget to save and plan financially for your new future.
Be sure if you go with an accountant that they're certified and that they have experience working with entrepreneurs or self-employed professionals. They might also be able to suggest ballpark figures for changes in taxes and interest rates that might need to be considered (or at least lead you into thinking about those things so you can take your questions to a tax expert).
Get the help you need so that you can arm yourself with information to fight fear and really take the action you need to set yourself up financially to transition into self-employment.
4. Use spreadsheets and other tech tools to help you track your plan and allow you to easily see the progress you're making in saving up and prepping for self-employment.
Sometimes spreadsheets can seem a bit complicated and annoying to use, but if you're good at creating and using them, please do. If you're not, there are templates you can use for budgeting that are perfect for setting up your "Quit My Job And Go Self-Employed" budget. You'll want to think about how much you can reasonably save, plus other ways to cut costs that won't drastically impact your quality of life, work output, or mental health.
If your bank has an app that tracks your spending and allows for organizing the information to track it, use that feature. You can also use budgeting apps to track your spending, offer reminders, or alert you of limits you've set so you can reach certain goals.
5. Start landing contracts and clients while you're employed.
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It might not be ideal to fast-track your quit date if you don't have savings or some other form of financial help, but if the pressure will motivate you, by all means, put things into high gear. I had very little savings when I left a job to go self-employed, and thank God it worked out, but I've learned through the years that the transition would have been a lot easier had I saved a bit more before resigning. I literally could have stayed an extra nine months to a year, gotten more clients and experience, and been a bit less stressed in my self-employment transition.
Even if your plan is two years from now, within those two years, you should be building up a framework that allows you to make more money today. Network, build that website, start offering your skills on a freelance basis as a side hustle, and funnel that money into savings for your future when you're fully self-employed. Talk to someone about investing some of those savings so that they can grow.
As long as what you're doing on the side is in alignment with any employment contracts and policies and does not jeopardize your standing at your day job, you can start squirreling money you're earning today doing what you will one day leave your job to do full time.
When I left my job years ago, I got my first client through a referral from someone I knew in my industry. My next one was also a referral---someone I'd worked with while being employed full-time at a company. By the time my little savings had run out, I'd already landed contracted work that guaranteed a certain amount of money, covering my bills through a certain period of time.
From there, I planned accordingly in order to increase my earnings, adding in clauses and other amendments in contracts to protect myself financially.
Transitioning into self-employment doesn't look the same financially for everyone, and some of us have to make real sacrifices in order to build up to the future life we want. For me, that included radically cutting out a few things I loved, leaving an apartment and going fully digital nomad, and maybe even taking on a few odd jobs in order to add to my savings in order to quit.
For you, it might look like cashing out that 401K (I did that, too, but beware of the penalties, as this should really be a last resort option.) For others, it might be using that "new car fund" to fund your life while you're working to land new clients from a beach paradise somewhere or living the exact same quality of life you had at your 9-to-5 because you were great with your savings, have help in the form of a spouse, or come into a cash settlement or inheritance.
However it looks for you, be smart with what you have, think positively and strategically about how you can realistically finance your transition, and utilize an exit plan that makes the transition much easier.
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Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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Hot Girl Moms: How These Black Celebrities Are Breaking Motherhood Stereotypes
Lately, I have really been in awe of Black moms — from my friends to celebrities. It's both beautifully surprising and thought-provoking to see your people navigating parenthood. Beyond this, it's truly inspiring to witness these Black women redefine motherhood, challenge societal norms, and pave the way for future generations.
One thing that has stood out is the way they choose to mother while also honoring themselves in every way. For one, motherhood doesn’t mean trading in your style, confidence, or ambition. There are powerhouse Black women who effortlessly balance being moms while keeping their hot-girl energy intact. From rocking stages to slaying red carpets, we decided to round up some celebs who redefine what it means to have it all.
These women are living proof that you don’t have to trade in your hot girl card when you become a mom. They’ve shown the world that you can be a caregiver and still exude the confidence, ambition, and style that makes you, you. Who says you can’t have it all?
Beyoncé
(L-R) Beyoncé and Blue Ivy Carter
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When you’re Queen Bey, there’s no dimming your light—ever. As a mom to Blue Ivy and twins Rumi and Sir, Beyoncé continues to dominate the music industry, embodying grace, power, and unmatched work ethic. From headlining Coachella to dropping jaw-dropping visuals for Renaissance, she proves motherhood only enhances the glow. In 2013, Beyonce told Vogue, that becoming a mother helped her to really understand the power of her body:
“I just feel my body means something completely different. I feel a lot more confident about it. Even being heavier, thinner, whatever. I feel a lot more like a woman. More feminine, more sensual. And no shame.”
Victoria Monét
Victoria Monét is the epitome of "cool mom energy." With her adorable daughter Hazel as her muse, she’s kept us grooving with tracks like "On My Mama." Balancing new motherhood and a skyrocketing career, she’s proof that you can have it all—and look flawless doing it.
During an interview with Self, Victoria shared, "After I had Hazel, I went into a full depression. I was very hard on myself, and just judging so much and worrying about what I used to look like and what I used to have. It’s just all living in the past, which is the setup [for feeling like a failure]," she says. "[But] you have to think forward. It’s been a battle to be okay with whatever size I am at the time. So if I go to Disneyland with Hazel, I’m not going to be worrying about the churro, because we’re only at Disney one day."
Jhené Aiko
Jhené Aiko keeps her ethereal energy strong as a mom to two kids, Namiko Love and Noah Hasani. From creating soulful, healing music to co-parenting like a pro, Jhené’s free-spirited essence shows you can nurture both your kids and your inner goddess.
This year, The Purple Agency honored a select group of prominent mothers for their inaugural Mom Honors and the "Stay Ready" singer was among the honorees. Aiko delivered a moving keynote address to conclude the event, sharing her lifelong aspiration of being a mom:
“I always knew I wanted to be a mom more than anything. That was my dream. This is great and I love to do this, but this is not my dream […] It’s fun, but nothing fulfills me more than being a mom."
Ciara
Ciara is serving hot girl mom with no signs of slowing down. From slaying the red carpet with Russell Wilson to inspiring moms everywhere with her fitness and dance routines, Ciara makes sure motherhood doesn’t put a pause on her glow-up. It’s clear that motherhood drives this Atlanta girly. CiCi told Yahoo Music:
“For me, I can speak for myself: Being a mom gave me a bit more of sexy confidence. And it's not about what I'm wearing, it's just more of an internal feeling. I feel there's something very cool about being able to deliver a child, and being able to work hard to get yourself back to that place before you had that child. It's a rewarding feeling… If anything, I think the sexy gets turned up even more!”
Serena Williams
Serena might have retired from professional tennis, but her "hot girl mom" era is still thriving. As a mom to Olympia and a new baby girl, Adira River, Serena continues to serve Black excellence, whether she’s owning the boardroom or slaying on social media. Speaking about how she became to be such a fearless woman toAllure, Serena said:
"I think my mom instilled in us to be confident women, to really believe in ourselves, be proud of our heritage, our hair, and our bodies. That was something that was really important for her to teach us. I’m definitely teaching it to my daughter.”
Rihanna
The billionaire beauty mogul, music icon, and now mother of two, Rihanna is redefining motherhood with unapologetic confidence. From rocking her baby bump at the Super Bowl to running her Fenty empire, Rih proves being a mom only amplifies the bad gal energy.
When asked about how motherhood initially felt for her, she told British Vogue, “Oh, my God, it’s legendary.” Rihanna also affirmed, "Women just need a little bit of validation," she said to The Associated Press. Adding, "You are beautiful. Your body's beautiful. Your body is sexy and you deserve to feel that way."
Cardi B
Cardi’s personality remains larger than life—even as a mom of two. Between her jaw-dropping fashion moments and hilarious, unfiltered parenting takes, she proves motherhood doesn’t stop you from being the life of the party. The Bronx native has had no problems sharing that she has so much compassion—and love and appreciation— for all mothers in the world.
“There is no excuse, we have to do it. I have compassion for good mothers who get up and hustle and work, or even not work—having kids is work. Raising a kid is work.”
And what a feat to work and werk at the same time!
Teyana Taylor
Teyana Taylor is the queen of doing it all. As a mom of two daughters, Iman Jr. and Rue, she balances a multifaceted career as a singer, director, and actress, all while keeping her edgy, hot-girl aesthetic on lock. Teyana Taylor's exceptionally toned physique, showcased in Kanye West's "Fade" music video just eight months after giving birth, ignited widespread admiration and inspired many women to prioritize their fitness goals.
“I love that I can inspire women to feel that way,” she told The FADER. “This video was to do just that. To inspire women and to let them know that we are super women, each and every one of us.”
Kelly Rowland
As a mom to Titan and Noah, Kelly Rowland stays killing the game with her elegance and star power. From her music to her dedication to fitness and fashion, she’s proof you can slay in both the boardroom and the playroom. When it comes to finding the balance of doing it all, she told Scary Mommy:
“I think [that’s] the hardest thing about being a mom. How can I be the best mom, wife, friend, and version of myself all at once? It can be overwhelming at times, but I’ve learned to become more patient with both others and myself, and remind myself it’s okay not to be everything for everyone all of the time.”
Flo Milli
Flo Milli
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While the “Never Lose Me” singer just announced her pregnancy on Nov. 25, we just know she’s gonna give hot mom vibes. The rapper took to social media sharing, “Flo mommy s— i can’t even see my coochie nomore that’s crazy.” She proudly displayed her baby bump in a series of photos, wearing a white crop top and orange shorts, reminding us that Flo Milli will always remain true to herself.
In an interview with Elle, Flo Milli shared she was raised in a nurturing environment with strong female role models, and she was inspired by neo-soul artists who emphasized self-love and empowerment. These influences instilled in her a strong sense of self-worth, which she actively promotes, particularly for dark-skinned Black women who often face challenges in the music industry. Flo Milli believes that self-perception is paramount, regardless of external opinions.
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