When I purchase a cleanser, I usually don't give it much thought beyond the price and whether or not it's noncomedogenic (won't break me out). But as a black woman that deals with issues like hyperpigmentation, oil overproduction, and hormonal breakouts, I started to wonder if there were products on the market with women of color as the focal point.
With brands like Fenty Beauty shaking the table in the beauty world and reminding brands that women of color matter, I did a little research to find brands that make cleansers with melanated skin in mind. I was able to round up six cleansers, five of which are made by women of color.
Bolden Skin Clarifying Cleanser
Bolden
I've seen Bolden's products floating around on my Instagram feed, but I had no idea that two black women founded the brand. Their gentle PH-balanced cleanser is made with zinc gluconate, which helps regulate sebum production while fighting bacteria, making it an ideal option for those of us with oily skin.
Marla Rene Micellar Cleansing Water
marlarene.com
Marla Rene is another line handcrafted for us by us! If you're a fan of gentle cleansers that lift dirt, oil, and even makeup, adding a micellar cleanser to your routine is a must. What makes this cleansing water special, aside from being the brainchild of a black woman, is that it's only made with eight ingredients and 90% of the elements are plant-based.
Avya Non-Foaming Gentle Cleanser
Amazon
Avya is fairly new to the market, but the brand's Kenyan-born founder Deepika Vyas crafted this beauty brand with melanin skin in mind. Their non-foaming gentle cleanser is made with anti-inflammatory ingredients like witch hazel, turmeric, and salicylic acid to balance skin and keep breakouts at bay.
Shop Here
Marla Rene Raw Honey Cleanser
marlarene.com
Whenever my skin is having a moment because I've over-exfoliated or tried a new product my skin was not happy with, I have a jar of raw honey I use to calm my inflamed skin, as honey is a humectant that draws moisture to the skin. This cleanser is made with raw honey and jojoba oil, which makes it ideal for those looking to brighten skin (honey is an AHA) while moisturizing.
Melt by Kaike
shopkaike.com
Founded by Keli Smith, KAIKE, has become a go-to for ladies looking for skincare made with natural, vegan, and preservative-free ingredients. KAIKE's Melt helps keep even the oiliest skin stay balanced. With simple ingredients like grapeseed oil, hemp seed oil, and castor oil — your skin will thank you.
Dr. Barbara Sturm Enzyme Cleanser
Molecular Cosmetics
If you've seen Angela Bassett's skin lately, you, like the rest of us, are wondering, "What is she using on her skin?" Now, celebrities have access to pricey treatments, but Auntie Angela and her dermatologist Dr. Sturm teamed up to create skincare options that answer the concerns of those of us with darker skin tones that we can pick up online or our local department store. The price of this cleanser might have you clutching your pearls, but since it's recommended to use this product 2-3 times a week — it may last you longer than you think.
Shop Here
After doing my research, it's nice to know that there are brands out there thinking about our skin concerns that are backed by women of color.
Featured image by Getty Images
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Gee, I wish more folks did all of this when it comes to if a man needs to have a large penis to sexually satisfy a woman (he does not) and if a woman who has had multiple sex partners will ultimately end up with a vagina that is too large for smaller penises to please her (a lie).
Science totally has my back on debunking both of those things (more on that in a bit). Know what else does? A particular type of sex method that is becoming more popular by the day. One that just might convince you to, as they used to say back in the day, focus less on the “size of the wave” and ride out the “motion of the ocean” instead.
It’s called shallowing. Here’s what it’s all about.
What Is Shallowing?
GiphyIf there’s one thing that I wish folks would say more thoroughly when it comes to women and orgasms, it’s that when it comes to75 percent of women not being able to orgasm from only intercourse, the accurate statement is they struggle with achieving a vaginal orgasm without the assistance of some type of clitoral stimulation. Yeah, we’ve really got to remember that very few things in this life are a complete monolith — orgasms included (check out “U-Spot Orgasm, Fantasy Orgasm & 6 Other Orgasms You Should Try Tonight”).
In fact, it was while I was reading up on pairing — a word that is used for when clitoral stimulation transpires during penetration — that I decided to do some deep-diving into shallowing (because it was mentioned inone of the articles that I read).And what is it? Shallowing is when a penis, finger, tongue, or sex toy of some sort is used in order to ever so slightly penetrate the vaginal opening of a woman.
And why is shallowing not just a current sex trend but something that every woman on this planet should try? It’s because of what I’ve said, more than once, on this platform: it focuses on the most sensitive part of a woman’s vagina, which isthe first two inches of her vaginal opening.
When the emphasis is placed there, not only does it increase your chances of experiencing “the big O,” but it can also build up anticipation, which can intensify your orgasms too — yes, shallowing can also be seen as a form of edging.
Another thing that’s cool about shallowing is — and it really and truly can’t be said enough — something that makes vaginal and blended orgasms easier to achieve for some women really has little to do with the size of a man’s package or even his technique; it’s straight up anatomy. Yep, the closer that a woman’s clitoris is to her vaginal opening, the easier it is for a penis to stimulate both. So, science makes it possible for vaginal orgasms to be easier for some women than others.
At the same time, shallowing can make it possible for more women who want to see what a vaginal orgasm actually feels like (because it’s easier for the head of the penis to stimulate the opening of the vagina while the shaft can rub up against your clitoris; based on the position that you are in, of course — the missionary with some pillows propped under the lower part of your back is ideal for this).
Now that you see what shallowing actually is, do you get why I said that penis size doesn’t matter when it comes to doing it — and getting the kind of orgasms that you want? Contrary to popular belief, your vagina is only around four inches. In fact, some health experts say that it ranges between 2-4”. Anything larger, your body literally has to stretch out to accommodate; this includes penises and babies. So, if your vagina is “making room” for more than four inches, why in the world do you think you need a 10-inch man? Yeah…exactly. It really is time to get over the silliness. The average penis continues to be 5.5”. Makes sense when you take it all in (no pun intended).
Aight, so now that you know what shallowing is all about, let me try and hard sell you on why it’s a sex technique that you should try as soon as tonight (if you possibly can).
1. It takes the pressure off of you and your partner.
I’ve been working with couples for almost 20 years at this point. This means that the topic of sex comes up quite a bit. And if there’s one thing that continues to be an issue is inconsistent orgasms (check out “Why Do Orgasms So Often Seem Like A ‘Hit-Or-Miss’ Experience For Women?”).
Listen, no matter how many articles you read or sex positions you try, if you’re anxious, stressed out, or overthinking, it’s gonna get in the way of you experiencing high peaks of pleasure on a consistent basis. Since shallowing is something that can easily be done even in foreplay (via fingering and/ororal sex) if you get that first “release” off, that makes it easier to just sit back and enjoy the ones that (hopefully) are to follow.
2. It teaches you more about your vagina.
A part of the reason why I keep repeating certain facts about vaginas in these articles is that it’s amazing how little certain things are discussed en masse — like the size of the vaginal tube. And since shallowing helps you to stimulate the nerve endings at the entrance of your va-jay-jay along with your G-spot (which is housed a little ways from your opening), shallowing is a great way to explore that area of your body as you figure out what truly works for you and…what doesn’t.
3. It’s the perfect merging of foreplay and intercourse.
When you really stop to think about it, shallowing is like the bridge between foreplay and intercourse because you can use so many different things to do it. So, if you want to experiment with a new sex toy or you want a bit more time to “warm up the engine” before full-on penetration begins, shallowing is one of the most sexually arousing compromises there is.
4. It can help to increase your partner’s stamina.
A few years back, I penned an article for the site entitled, “We’ve Got Some All-Natural Ways To Increase Stamina & Sensitivity.” Listen, even though I onceread a GQ article that said that over 60 percent of the people they polled were fine with intercourse lasting no longer than 5-10 minutes — that poll doesn’t speak for all of us, chile.
So, if you would like your man to build up to going longer, shallowing can help to make that happen. Since he’s barely putting beyond the tip in, he can learn how to be in you for longer periods of time without being, well, in you.
5. It helps you to appreciate whatever “package” he has.
Again — and it really can’t be said enough — if shallowing is all about exploring the mere entrance of your vagina, you don’t need a man with BDE (check out “BDE: Please Let The 'It Needs To Be Huge' Myth Go”) or honestly, even anything close to it.
I mean, even though, reportedly, the size that the average woman says gives her the most orgasms is eight inches — I bet those women have never really tried shallowing before. 10”, 8”, or the average 5.5” can certainly get the job done. And well.
6. It feels A-MAZ-ING.
Okay,so now that you know about shallowing, I promise that if you put the word into your favorite search engine, you’re either gonna see articles on golfing (LOL) or sex, especially as of late. That’s because more couples are trying it out and getting mind-blowing results from it. So, if you’re looking for something new to try, give shallowing a shot.
Hey, anything that’s designed to stimulate your most intense vaginal nerve endings has got to be something for the record books. I mean, how could it not be? Lawd.
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Featured image by Juan Moyano/Getty Images
