For many, if they were told to describe what happiness looks like to the them, the words "success", "money", or "significant other" would be thrown around. The reality that we end up facing is our own false perception as we learn that our flawed expectations were never designed to be the solutions to our problems.
The same can be said about singer Michelle Williams. While at the peak of her career as ⅓ of one of the most successful girl groups of all-time Destiny's Child, she was also at rock bottom as she secretly battled depression. Just last year, she revealed on The Talk her manager's response to learning she was depressed: "Y'all just signed a multi-million dollar deal, you're about to go on tour, what do you have to be depressed about?"
Through her decade journey of inner frustrations to suicidal thoughts, life bloomed at the end of the dark tunnel. With a loving fiance and her home decor business, Believe By Michelle, the 37-year-old still ensures she doesn't lose sight of taking care of the anchor of her happiness, which is herself. In an interview with Forbes, she said:
"That whole, 'While you sleep I was grinding' foolishness? No, please rest. This past week, I literally had to take stuff off my calendar. I had too much going on, and was starting to feel pulled. Sorry, call me flakey if you want to, but my mental health is way more important. I don't want to go back to that dark hole, you know what I mean? Depression is really no joke at all. I'm a big fan of therapy, counseling. I'm about to be married, so I want to make sure I'm continuing the healing process, for my husband."
The "grind 24/7" mentality that has become the social norm is unhealthy and drives people into insanity more than prosperity. It not only results in everything becoming a competition, but also it ups the ante on emotionally living off validation from others.
While working to please others, we forget what pleases ourselves and dig an even bigger hole of creating a facade that everything is going well by sharing shallow victories with the world when, in actuality, our minds are filled with misery and self-loathing. If you want to see a change in your mental space and attitude towards life, you have to slow things down in your packed schedule to create a specific time that is set strictly for your peace of mind.
"If you spend 30 minutes on Instagram, maybe just spend 20 and do 10 minutes of meditation, push-ups, drinking water… Instead of putting the kids to bed at 8:00, make sure they're in the bed at 7:30, so you got 30 minutes for you. Start somewhere."
No matter how far you believe you've gotten through your own personal battles with your inner demons, self-care shouldn't lose its value and should always be at the center of your life.
To read Michelle's Forbes feature in full, click here.
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