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The Ultimate Guide For Sending A Tasteful Nude
“…how you talked me into sending that to you? I’ll never know. f-ck it, girl. I’m bout whatever, tho." -Drake, "Recognize"
While talking to an older relative, she asked me why my generation was so obsessed with sharing everything. I didn’t have much of an answer for her, because I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr. And I’ve sent a nude or 15. I guess it’s just how we do things. This relative, a 60-plus-year-old woman who “doesn’t trust Google” and probably still has money hidden under a mattress somewhere, just didn’t get it, and I was in no position to explain it to her without sharing some rather frisky details about myself. We millennials are into documenting and sharing everything. I mean, if it wasn't caught on Snapchat did it really even happen?
On the topic of nudes, allow me to start by saying I believe them to be a pretty cool way to keep things spicy. It took me a bit of time to come around to the idea of taking half-naked pics, but when I found myself in a long-distance relationship that went on for nearly two years, I decided to give it a try. I trusted my boyfriend and wanted to make him happy. But when I decided to try my hand at my inaugural nude, I couldn't help but wonder how I'd react to having my mentions explode because my nipples made their way onto Twitter.
How would I tell my mother that I wanted to make my boyfriend's day and that's why my ass is plastered all over the explore page of IG?
Luckily, I've never had to defend my nudes. The recipient(s) know that I will sue them for every single pair of Jordans they own and come for their mommas' too. But, not all women can relate to that. I've been on Twitter for about 7 years and I've seen my share of pictures leaked by jaded lovers. In the early days, leaked photos meant deactivating your account because it's over. These gross invasions of privacy led to endless retweets and droves of folks cheering on the leaker. Thankfully, those days are almost over. Now, the leaking of nude photos is often blamed on the true fool, a.k.a. the person who thought stooping to such a level and violating someone who trusted them was cool. Society is now much less forgiving of those who resort to said tactics and legislature has been passed in several states to protect victims against what has been dubbed “revenge porn.”
Unsurprisingly, victims of revenge porn are usually 15- to 25-year-old women who did nothing but document intimate moments with a non-deserving idiot. Though there is no way to ensure that you never become the star of some revenge porn flick (outside of completely opting out of sending them, which is no fun), there are ways to protect your privacy in the event that you don't know someone as well as you thought. Here are a few tips:
- No face, no case. Angles are our friends. They have the ability to enhance the sexy and show off one's creativity. A solid lip + boob shot can be much more effective than an entire selfie.
[Tweet "A solid lip + boob shot can be much more effective than an entire selfie."]
- Try to avoid showcasing distinctive tattoos and birthmarks. If you have an insane chest piece, consider throwing on a tank and using good lighting to get a solid nipple pic, Or, stay out of the boob area entirely and send pics of your…well, something that could belong to any woman, if you catch my drift.
- Please don't use THAT mirror. If these pictures do find their way onto the timeline, it’s kinda hard to say it wasn’t you when it has those blue curtains from Target’s 2013 back-to-college collection. You know, the same exact ones in just about every other selfie you’ve posted in the last two years. Location. It's all about location.
- STAY AWAY FROM F-BOYS. If you've seen him leak pics of other women, please proceed with caution. Any guy who has, alludes to or jokes about leaking pictures is probably not someone you should be sending your nani to. Just saying.
Lastly, if someone ever does try to use your nude photos against you, remember that you are NOT the problem. You did what you did in confidence and probably looked damn good doing it.
At worst, you’ll have to explain it all to your dad, but at best, you could end up with a Kim Kardashian-sized come-up. Or maybe just an episode of Love and Hip-Hop. Ya never know!
What are some of your tips and tricks for sending nudes? Share with us below.
This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
Feature image courtesy
Is it just me, or do our bodies have an “If it’s not one thing, it’s another” vibe as we get older? And lately, new or recurring skin conditions have been yet another thing to add to the growing list of “WTF is this, am I dying?” When it comes to seborrheic dermatitis, it’s one of the most common skin issues, impacting 3 to 10 out of 100 people, per the National Institute of Health. You may have heard of it, been diagnosed with it, or will relate to this article and finally feel seen and relieved that there’s a name for what you’ve been going through.
We’re breaking down everything you need to know about seborrheic dermatitis, from what it is and its symptoms to shutting down a few common myths, and of course, how to know if you actually have it. Let’s get into it.
What Are The Signs?
You may be experiencing seborrheic dermatitis if your skin, eyebrows, scalp, or facial hair has dandruff, irritable skin patches, or flakes, according to the Mayo Clinic. More specifically, and on the verge of TMI, oily skin with flat white or yellow scales may also be a sign.
When it comes to rashes, it’s likely they’ll show up in a ring-like form (which is called petaloid seborrheic dermatitis). For the melanated folks, rashes may appear darker or lighter (per the National Eczema Association, people of color may get a more intense flare-up with lesions on the hairline and discoloration), while those with fair skin may experience red rash areas.
Where Is It?
While seborrheic dermatitis can occur on various body parts, it’s frequently seen on the scalp, according to the NEA. The Mayo Clinic notes that the condition also pops up on oily facial and body areas like the edges of one’s nose, eyelids, and eyebrows, as well as the chest and ears. Skin can appear inflamed with rashes and patches, and the scalp will typically battle with relentless dandruff.
Seborrheic dermatitis can be super irritating and frustrating, but fortunately, if you’ve been diagnosed, it doesn’t lead to permanent hair loss, and it isn’t contagious, The Mayo Clinic states. In fact, with doctor-prescribed treatment or products like special shampoo, it could disappear or at least reduce flare-ups.
What Triggers It?
It’s difficult to pinpoint what specifically causes the condition. The Mayo Clinic points out that it could arise thanks to too much oil in the skin or the presence of Malassezia, a type of fungi. Commonly, things like fatigue, weather changes, and stress also play a role. More serious conditions that can trigger it range from Parkinson’s and depression to HIV, as well as the aftermath of life-altering events like a heart attack.
Bronchitis, strep throat, the flu, tonsillitis, and ear and respiratory infections are also known to cause flare-ups, along with skin issues like bruises, sunburns, scratches, and bites, per the Cleveland Clinic.
Interestingly enough, the NIH notes that seasons changing has a role too. Seborrheic dermatitis can disappear in the summer months, and then make a comeback like it never left in the winter.
Who Does It Affect?
Unlike many other things we go through as women, seborrheic dermatitis is actually more common for men, according to the NIH. It often appears for the first time in the young adult years or for those who are older than 50.
What About Psoriasis Though?
Seborrheic dermatitis is often compared to psoriasis, and for good reason. They both impact the skin, especially the scalp area. They can both also leave scaly patches on the skin, flakes on your hair, and cause itching. However, they’re not identical. Healthline notes that areas of seborrheic dermatitis flareups are typically easier to remove compared to psoriasis. Psoriasis also tends to be sorer and more tender, while seborrheic dermatitis can itch or create a burning sensation.
Let’s Clear The Air
There are a few rumors about the power of seborrheic dermatitis and what it can cause. So let’s break down the truth for a second. According to the NEA, this condition is not cancerous, nor does it indicate or increase a higher risk for cancer in the future.
Just a reminder, it doesn’t cause hair loss, nor is hair loss a symptom. If you are experiencing concerning hair loss, it is likely a sign of something else.
How Can You Treat It?
Seborrheic dermatitis can be treated pretty easily (praises be). Certain medicines like shampoos with tar, anti-inflammatory creams that include steroids, creams and shampoos with antifungal agents, or creams that feature salicylic acid, can be applied to the inflamed area to help resolve the problematic area, according to the NIH.
Just a note though: As tempting as it is to cover up scaly patches with heavy foundation or concealer, experts with the NIH actually advise against it as it can clog your pores. However, a light foundation can be used occasionally, along with skin care products that aren’t too oily to help temporarily conceal it.
A unique type of sunscreen also isn’t needed. You can use what you typically would before stepping out into the sun. And your skin soaking in a few extra rays could actually help your skin.
Should You Self-Diagnose?
As tempting as it is to make an appointment with Dr. Google, The Mayo Clinic advises you to call your actual physician if the condition interrupts your sleep, makes you lose focus throughout the day, contributes to anxiety, or simply doesn’t go away with at-home remedies. Simply put, it’s always best to check with your doctor to ensure you’re actually experiencing seborrheic dermatitis and get the treatment you need to help monitor or prevent it.
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