

Did You Know Fall & Winter Are The Best Times To Have Sex?
Yeah buddy. I'm a Gemini. My brother's a Gemini. One of my closest friends is a Gemini. My two goddaughters? Yep, you guessed it—they too are Geminis. This means that all of our parents decided to get it on sometime between the months of September and October. So, you know what that means? Some serious baby-making action was going on in the fall. Not only that, but other than June, guess when the most popular months for weddings are? September and October (apparently this year, October 12 is the most popular day). Then of course, colder weather brings along with it cuffing season (scouting begins in August, drafting is in September, tryouts is in October, pre-season is November and the actual season is December through March).
So personally, before I even did all of the research that I'm about to share with you, I didn't need to be convinced that the most sex tends to happen sometime between September 23 and March 19. But when I did some digging into the science behind some of these facts, let's just say that if you want to take your own sex life to the next level, right about now (until spring, chile) would be the time to do it—and do it well (did you catch that LL Cool J reference? I bet you did!).
1. Autumn Means It’s Time to “Fall Back”
I'm actually the kind of girl who enjoys the dark and the cold. Still, I'm not really sure why we still need daylight savings time (you know, when our clocks go back an hour). Whatever the reason, it actually works in your favor when it comes to your sex life, because science says that fall is the best time to have sex. It's in part, due to all of the cold, darkness, wind and rain that makes you want to stay indoors. Although that kind of weather can trigger feelings of melancholy and even seasonal depression, it also makes us want to get close and cuddle more than any other time of the year.
2. There’s More Rain. And Rain Makes Us Hornier.
"Making Love in the Rain" (by Herb Alpert featuring Janet Jackson and Lisa Keith) is a throwback jam that you might want to pull back out right about now. The reason why is because it's right on-par with what I'm about to say. There's typically a lot of rain in the fall and, I find it interesting that Trojan's Degrees of Pleasure study says, that the most comfortable temperature to have sex is between 68-69 degrees. Why did that intrigue me? It's because that's the same temp that a lot of energy-savers recommend for night sleeping (if you want to sleep comfortably and keep your energy bill down at the same time).
Something else that the study revealed is 80 percent say that there is nothing better than sex on a rainy day (I concur); four out of 10 Americans are totally down for going outside when it's pouring down. #nice
3. Testosterone Levels Rise
Ah, so this must be the reason why my birthday is in June. Both men and women have testosterone in their system. It's a hormone that serves several purposes; one of them is directly connected to our sex drives. Well, according to one study, testosterone peaks right around the end of fall and the beginning of winter. The more of it that's flowing through your system, the more sex that you want to have.
4. Men Find You More Attractive
Grandma used to tell us that we should leave something to the imagination. She apparently was onto something because some research that was conducted in Poland revealed that men tend to find our bodies more attractive during the fall and winter seasons. The main reason why is, since we're layered in our sweaters 'n stuff, it piques their curiosity about what we've got going on underneath. So, if it seems like more men are staring at you in the mall or there's an increase of DMs sliding in your socials during the colder seasons, this may be why.
5. It’s Easier to Get Pregnant
If you want to have a summer baby, now would be the time to get to working on that little miracle project. The reason why is sperm counts are actually at their lowest from August-October due to men's bodies recovering from all of the summer heat that they had to endure. But as the weather cools down, their swimmers are back in full effect again; higher than ever, actually. So yep, when it comes to conceiving, starting around Halloween is definitely a good idea.
6. Pumpkins Are in Season
Pumpkins are harvested in September and October. Good thing too because, aside from the fact that it's a fruit that is high in Vitamin A, rich in antioxidants and contains compounds that are really good for your skin, men love the smell of it. No joke.
If you combine some pumpkin essential oil with lavender essential oil and place it on some of your erogenous zones, the combination has the ability to increase the blood flow to your man's penis by as much as 40 freakin' percent!
You can purchase some potent-yet-affordable pumpkin essential oil here. (You're welcome.)
7. You Want to Stay in and Watch Rom-Coms More Often
I'm not a big Christmas girl myself, but I do think the Hallmark films that run incessantly during the early winter season are super cute. If you're someone who likes them too, you can probably get your man to join in during the fall and winter more than any other time.
One reason is because research reveals that many of us will forego something that we really want to do outside of the home, simply because of how cold we perceive it to be during the winter (even if it's not). And since we tend to produce more serotonin when it's darker (and colder), guys usually want to curl up and cuddle more; they are usually more sentimental too. As a bonus, since some studies claim that rom-coms can increase our levels of self-improvement, if your man typically can't be moved to watch one, maybe that can be your selling point.
8. Your Immune System Tends to Strengthen
There are so many benefits to having sex. It reduces stress. It burns calories. It keeps your heart healthy. It relieves pain. It makes you more flexible. It lowers your blood pressure. It strengthens your pelvic floor. If the sex is fellatio, you can click here to see some other advantages that come with it. And, it has the ability to strengthen your immune system.
I think it's rather awesome that during the time of year when colds and flus are in abundance, participating in sex can help to keep them at bay. And since the more sex you have, the better your health will be, why not use the fall and wintertime to get—and keep—your body right?
9. Engagements Are in the Air. Holidays Too.
Surely it comes as no surprise that the most engagements happen between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day. You're around loved ones. Everyone's in a celebratory mood. It just feels right. But even if there's not an engagement in your near future, there's still a good chance that you'll have more sex during the holidays, simply because you'll probably take some time off of work. Less time at the office means more time that you can spend in the bedroom. Or wherever it is that you plan to, umm, do it.
10. You’re Twice as Likely to Get Some
OK, this was more of a clickbait point because there isn't actual data that says that just because it's cold outside, your chances for boo-tay will double. But what I did find to be interesting is more than twice as many condoms are sold the week before Christmas as opposed to the week after. Some experts say that makes rubbers the ultimate Christmas present to give and/or receive.
Hey, sometimes the good thing that comes in small packages isn't a diamond but a prophylactic. Just sayin'. So. pick some up on your way home and allow me the opportunity to welcome you to fall, winter and all of the wall-climbing goodness it can bring!
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
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After being a regular contributor for about four years and being (eh hem) MIA in 2022, Shellie is back penning for the platform (did you miss her? LOL).
In some ways, nothing has changed and in others, everything has. For now, she'll just say that she's working on the 20th anniversary edition of her first book, she's in school to take life coaching to another level and she's putting together a platform that supports and encourages Black men because she loves them from head to toe.
Other than that, she still works with couples, she's still a doula, she's still not on social media and her email contact (missnosipho@gmail.com) still hasn't changed (neither has her request to contact her ONLY for personal reasons; pitch to the platform if you have story ideas).
Life is a funny thing but if you stay calm, moments can come full circle and this is one of them. No doubt about it.
Black women are not a monolith. We all are deserving of healing and wholeness despite what we've been through, how much money we have in the bank, or what we look like. Most importantly, we are enough—even when we are not working, earning, or serving.
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How Our Favorite Black Women Celebs Spent Their First Paychecks
Do you remember what you did with your first real-job paycheck? I mean that check that was the answer to all your prayers. You could finally afford rent, groceries, and happy hour. Maybe you were able to put a down payment on your dream car. Maybe you bought your first house or bought that Fendi bag you'd been eyeing since childhood. (Was that just me?)
Spending that first major paycheck is both a moment of celebration and a way to acknowledge your hard work. It's a dream realized. It can also be the biggest mistake of your life. (And that's okay. Life is about making those and moving on to bigger and better from the lessons).
When I got my first nice-sized paycheck that was over $1,500 after taxes, I spent it on an overseas trip. I'd never been allowed to travel abroad in my teens and in my 20s, I spent the bulk of my paychecks on my half of the rent (Roommate life, anyone?) and coping mechanisms for burnout. (Think lots of Hennessy, four-day-a-week club nights, 7-nights-a-week eating out, a few emergency room visits, a couple of run-ins with toxic boyfriends, and impulsive shopping at Century 21, Forever 21, and H&M.)
Let's take a look at how our favorite Black women in sports, music, and entertainment spent their first big paychecks, if not just to remind ourselves that they, too, are human and have the usual feelings of power and vulnerability when receiving a large lump sum:
Dimitrios Kambouris/Staff/Getty Images
Kerry Washington
The UnPrisoned star also shared with The Hollywood Reporter that her first purchase from the proceeds of one of her first major acting gigs to buy a laptop, hoarding the per diem cash she was given during her time shooting Save The Last Dance--her second movie role, ever---under a mattress.
Issa Rae
Actress, producer and entrepreneur Issa Rae told Buzzfeed Celeb that she bought a Tesla with her first big paycheck after getting a major role. She also told US Weeklythat after buying it, she got into an accident a month later and was without a car for a whole year.
Stefanie Keenan / Contributor/Getty Images
Kelly Rowland
Kelly Rowland reportedly did what many of us do when we finally get our hands on a nice sum of money: splurge, especially on things that we didn't have easy access to in childhood. She told Instyle that she bought groceries that her mom used to tell her were "too expensive" and had a party where everyone enjoyed the food and had fun. (Same, sis. Same.) She further talked about the lessons she learned from buying a 5-bedroom house after becoming a millionaire at 20.
Enjoying the fruits of her Destiny's Child labor, she recalled that the home was "too big" and that she was "too young" to buy such a home. She'd later make informed choices about how she spent her money and used credit cards.
Serena Williams
Both Serena Williams sisters have always acknowledged the valuable money lessons they learned early on from their father. When Serena got her first check, she reportedly took it straight to the bank, rolling up to the drive-through (as if it wasn't $1 million!) She also said in an interview that she wouldn't just go pick up her check and the tour directors at the time had to eventually come and give it to her. Talk about discipline!
Daniele Venturelli / Contributor/Getty Images
Regina King
Regina King is the ultimate legendary actress who has range (from 80's classic 227 to '90 cult favorite Boyz In The Hood to iconic western The Harder They Fall) and looks damn good after decades in Hollywood. She told The Hollywood Reporterthat when she got her first big paycheck, she invested in something many of us promise ourselves when we've gotten to a certain salary or status: a car.
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