The definition of a power suit has changed over the past twenty years because women have redefined what it means to have power. In recent years, we have proven that the future is hella female and we will always create our own lane. With women adjusting their crowns and truly owning their power in their designated fields, the power suit has evolved from massive shoulder armor and bow ties.
Don't get me wrong, we will always be obsessed with women like Olivia Pope and Joan Clayton who could make any tailored suit look flawless. But now that women can decide what it means to have power and what style staples ignite that power, there is no stopping us.
We had the chance to chat with five powerful women and they shared their definition of a power suit and how they avow their power.
Kashmir Thompson
A funky pair of shades is a must in Kashmir's rendition of a power suit.
What She Does:
Designer and Owner of KashmirVIII
What Makes Her A Powerful Woman:
"I think what makes me powerful is my confidence in my abilities. I truly believe I can do WHATEVER I want to do, and successfully. I think people see that in me and respect that. And respect will always be a key to power."
Her Power Moment:
"I'm going to say last year when I was a vendor at Essence Festival. That was my first time vending there and for a venue so large, with such a large audience. Having so many of my supporters in one space was an eye-opening experience for me. There were soooo many of them. People coming up to me telling me how much they love me and my work was overwhelming. Not to mention meeting so many new people who didn't know me and who were in awe immediately. A lady came into my booth and saw one of my paintings titled, 'Easin', and literally cried. That experience was one that made me step back and say, 'Wow...look at what I can do.'"
Her Power Suit:
"A dope pair of sneakers, a beat face, one of my clutches, and a funky pair of shades are definitely my staples. If you ever see me, I'm going to have at least two of the four!"
Kumasi Aaron
Color is Kumasi's version of the power suit.
What She Does:
National Correspondent for E.W. Scripps
What Makes Her A Powerful Woman:
"I am powerful because I don't let doubts and fears keep me from letting the world see who I am. It's a process, but every day, I set the intention to do it and it becomes easier every time. I am a National Correspondent, rocking my natural hair, and bringing the fullness of who I am to every interview I do and every story I write. The way I ask a question, the way I craft a story is authentically me. I think that makes for more compelling journalism, but the real power is being able to connect with people in a truer way, and in turn, empowering them to share a little more of themselves with the world."
Her Power Moment:
"As an Anchor and Reporter at a TV news station in Florida, my bangs breaking off led me to discover the beauty that was my natural hair! So when I was off, it would be out in all its glory but while at work, I wore a wig. After a while, I started to feel like I was hiding who I was, and decided to talk with my manager about being able to wear my natural hair on air. She was okay with it, and although I was excited, I was unsure how our audience would react. I can still remember sitting behind the desk for the first time and telling myself, 'This is who you are. You love it, and so will they.' I anchored like I was the most powerful beautiful queen on the screen. And guess what? They love it too! But even if they hadn't, that moment forced me to embrace my power, and that was priceless."
Her Power Suit:
"Can a power suit be a jumpsuit? Mine is. I was a little hesitant to wear this on air first, but it just makes me feel so powerful, feminine, and confident, I just went with it anyway. Now it's one of the things I reach for when I want an outfit that stands out without being too loud. Another power suit for me is a dress in a color that pops. Armed with this and a smile, I feel powerful walking in any room!"
Tiffany Battle
For Tiffany, personality is her power.
What She Does:
Creator of The Werk! Place
What Makes Her A Powerful Woman:
"There's power in being authentic. So, the ability to move authenticity from theory to reality is what makes me a powerful woman."
Her Power Moment:
"The transitional moments in life have forced me to get to know myself better. With each test and trial, I've found more strength to embrace my power."
Her Power Suit:
"With any look, I like to infuse my personality. So, my power suit is definitely going to have a little mixed print flavor to it."
Paige Parker
Paige believes flexibility is key for honing her power.
What She Does:
Founder of Whole Health Club
What Makes Her A Powerful Woman:
"Connection, creation and, passion. I have the ability to connect with most people that I meet, on such a deep level that it feels like I have known them my whole life. I create relationships and bonds through trust and honesty. I choose to surround myself with like-minded individuals who aspire to conquer the same life goals; it's almost as if we are feeding off of each other's hustle, good vibes, and passion. I always knew I wanted to help women discover the healthiest version of themselves but I had to make sure I was the healthiest version of ME before I could help anyone else. I notice that when I make connections, create relationships and express my passion for health and wellness, I feel balanced and at ease. When I discovered how these three words made me feel, I realized I wanted to help others find their true value and purpose in life. When you feel balanced, everyone else around you can feel it too! I teach women how to see that they have value and purpose, I guide them to TRUE self-care, I help them see that their past DOES NOT define them and I show them the value of empowering/uplifting other women."
Her Power Moment:
"In 2016, I started Whole Health Club with my husband, Chase, and my best friend, Sam. We moved out to Colorado with the intention of opening up a gym that felt like home to our clients. We knew NO ONE, but we had a vision and we weren't going to stop until we made that vision a reality. Whole Health Club is the gym with the kitchen. We believe in taking the WHOLE approach to health and fitness, so we added a residential style kitchen to help our clients bring back cooking into their homes. We also have an open space with free weights and a classroom where I teach yoga. When we opened Whole Health Club, I had NO IDEA how much energy it was going to take to make it happen, I quickly learned that if I let every bump in the road get to me, then this path to success was going to be a LONG one. I had to go within and find what gave me the power to survive a day in the life of an entrepreneur. I knew if I made connections with the right people, created relationships that serve my divine path to success, and continued to express my passion for health and fitness, then NOTHING could stand in my way."
Her Power Suit:
"Yoga pants and any SOFT fabrics! Being in the fitness field is amazing because I get to wear comfortable outfits that fit my body and allow me to embrace my athletic body. I am all about LEGGINGS, anywhere from seamless and soft to tight and sporty. Alo Yoga is a brand that I love so much because of, not only their clothes, but everything that they stand for as a company. A-air L-land O-ocean are the perfect words, and truth that yoga can be done ANYWHERE. When I feel like I can move and breathe, I feel like my most powerful self."
Kesha McLeod
Bold color is how Kesha makes her powerful statement to the world.
What She Does:
Wardrobe Stylist & Owner of KMCME
What Makes Her A Powerful Woman:
"I'm powerful because Women are stronger. Men learn from us. We're amazing beings. We work, we nurture, we endure pain, then get back to business. We are all-around."
Her Power Moment:
"Stepping out on my own and leaving my previous agency forced me to do my own thing. I became a better person and I was more confident in myself. I never knew I wasn't confined, but I knew I had to make my OWN major decisions so that I knew I had power. Now it cannot be taken away from me. That feeling is priceless."
Related: How Kesha McLeod Went from Working In Retail to Styling The Biggest Names In Sports
Her Power Suit:
"My style staples are always a great color no matter if it's a suit, coat, or as simple as a sweater. I think anyone in a bold color can make a powerful statement!"
Featured image via Kesha McLeod/Instagram
Originally published February 12, 2018
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
___
Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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1. Go All Out with the Christmas Décor
GiphyThere is someone I know who is so obsessed with Christmas, she’s damn near annoying-borderline-terrifying. I’m. Not. Kidding. Yet hey, if you’re going to do a holiday-themed staycation (emphasis on “holiday-themed”), that’s kind of how you’ve got to be. Some décor ideas include:
- A fresh Christmas tree (is the most ideal) that is ultimately decorated
- Wreaths on outside and inside doors
- Garland (with twinkle lights) in predictable and unpredictable places
- Poinsettias
- Mistletoes
- Snow globes
- A stocking (with some of your favorite things in it)
- Fake snow
- Stars
- Angels
- Candy canes
- A BLACK Santa (LOL)
I mean, since you are going to be spending a lot of time at home, it can feel like a mini-winter wonderland if you are intentional about doing more decorating to your living space than you ever have before!
2. Buy a Couple of Christmas-Themed PJs
GiphyWhile I was doing some research on a totally different topic, I happened upon an article that talked about the psychology behind why we should be intentional about what we wear to bed. When you stop to think about the fact that (hopefully) you are sleeping somewhere between 6-8 hours every night, it would make sense that things like the color and fabric of your sleepwear would have a real impact on you — even subconsciously.
Well, when it comes to Christmas décor, specifically, not only does it take you back to nostalgic memories, it can also boost your moods. So, aside from being on-10 with your Christmas décor, also invest in some Christmas-themed PJs. Since you’re going to be doing a lot of lounging around (RIGHT?), do it in something that makes you think about all of your favorite things about this time of year.
3. Cop Some Christmas-Scented Candles
GiphyThere really is no telling how many articles that I’ve written where I am singing the praises of scented soy candles. Candles are soothing, comforting and a very easy way to reduce stress. Also, since it gets darker quicker and for a longer period of time around this time of the year, candles provide a relaxing vibe to your home. Since it is Christmastime, go with scents that are reminiscent of the season:
- Cinnamon
- Vanilla
- Cranberry
- Apple
- Pine
- Frankincense and Myrrh
- Peppermint
- Cashmere
- Ginger(bread)
- Orange
- Sugar Cookies
- Sandalwood
- Cloves
- Cedarwood
- (Hot) Chocolate
Personally, one of my favorite candle companies is Goose Creek. Their signature collections will have your entire house smelling like a high-end bakery. No exaggeration.
4. Play Some Winter-Themed ASMR Sounds
GiphyI’m from Nebraska and my mother was a New Yorker. So, if there is one thing that I like, it’s seasons and that includes snow during wintertime. Unfortunately, Nashville is cray-cray when it comes to that. If, where you live, the weather is all over the place too (which is why I think it’s insane that some people still give pushback to global warming) and you would like for it to at least seem like you are in your own winter wonderland — invest in some fake snow to strategically place around your home.
Oh, and don’t forget to turn on some winter-themed ASMR sounds too. YouTube has videos that run for hours on end that feature blizzards and howling winds that really can make you feel like you are in the midst of an ice storm.
5. Host a Holiday Movie Marathon
GiphyOne thing to remember about a staycation is it doesn’t mean that you have to be alone or that the only people who can participate are the ones who live with you. Since a staycation is simply about staying close to home instead of traveling afar — absolutely consider having some of your favorite people over for a holiday-themed movie marathon. Shoot, Black America Web even did you a solid by publishing “25 Best Black Christmas Movies Of All Time;” plus, Tubi has a Black holiday hits section of indie films too.
Oh, and make sure to get creative with the Christmas-themed snacks. Some ideas? Some Kentucky-fried turkey tenders with cranberry hot sauce (recipe here), some Holiday Hot Spinach Dip (recipe here), some Grinch Kabobs (recipe here), some roasted pecans (recipe here) and some Pomegranate Guacamole (recipe here).
6. Spend a Night (or Two) at a Hotel or Vacation House
GiphyJust like you don’t have to be alone during a staycation, you also don’t have to be cooped up in your house the entire time. Get a change of scenery in your own city by spending the night in a hotel that you’ve always wanted to try out or renting a vacation house for you and some of your folks to hang out in during the time between Christmas and New Year’s Day. I have a “love little sister” who does this randomly when she needs a break from her work as a therapist. She says that it’s damn near like taking a trip (and she has PLENTY of passport stamps; trust me).
7. Have Brunch or Dinner at a Christmas-Themed Restaurant
GiphyIf nothing puts a bigger smile on your face than the thought of DoorDashing meals and barely even touching your stove during your staycation — hey, I am right there with you. Do consider going out to brunch or dinner during your chill time, though. It’s another way to bond with people and create some current holiday memories. And if you’ve got a bae and you opt for dinner, it can be a wonderful type of Christmas-themed date.
8. Go to a Holiday-Themed Concert
GiphyBeing that I got my start as an entertainment writer, hear me when I say that I’m not someone who just has to go to a live concert every chance that I get. Oh, but baby, when I saw that El DeBarge was doing a City Winery tour and he was going to be here right before Christmas — I booked myself a ticket quick, fast and in a super-duper hurry! Shoot, I didn’t even want to go with someone because I plan to give him and that falsetto voice of his my complete and undivided attention. LOL.
I don’t know what it is about the holiday season that makes live music that much more enjoyable — but if there is a concert that features one of your favorite artists happening right through here, consider that to be a cool way to “tour your city” while cultivating a really awesome memory at the same time.
9. Also, Go Ice Skating
GiphyOne of my fondest memories of time with my father is going ice skating. We actually would do it in the summer (because that is when I would visit him) and, every year, he would get me a new ice skating outfit. Even now, when I watch someone ice skate (even in movies; like in the classic movie Garden State), I will have warm fuzzies.
Anyway, if you’ve never been before, go. If it’s been forever since you have, also go. There is something that is very sweet and so signature Christmas about it. Plus, it’s a top-tier form of exercise.
10. Take a Christmas Lights Tour
GiphyAnother one of my favorite Christmas memories is driving through neighborhoods and looking at the Christmas lights. And just like a Christmas concert can be a form of hometown touring, so can doing this if you decide to choose a couple of areas where you’ve never really been or rarely frequent.
Now are you excited about the thought of experiencing a holiday-themed staycation?
I thought you would be. ENJOY!
Featured image by Shutterstock