Muni Long Opens Up About Domestic Violence: ‘You Don't Expect The Love Of Your Life To Turn Into Your Enemy’
Since leaving songwriting full-time to pursue her dream of being a singer, Muni Long has seen mainstream success. Her song “Hrs & Hrs” went viral during the pandemic and won her a Grammy, and since then, she has had everyone singing, “Twin, where have you been?” which are the lyrics to her song “Made For Me."
But while her star was rising, she was battling hardships in her personal life. In August, Muni released her new album, Revenge, and during her visit to The Terrell Show, she opened up about what inspired her recent music, particularly her song “Revenge."
“One song that just evokes a lot of emotion is the title track, “Revenge,” because I talk about some domestic violence there in the bridge. And I don't think a lot of people understand, like, I've been through a lot, and I just don't talk about it,” she revealed.
When asked how faith played a role during this turbulent time in her life, she shared how it was difficult as she was often told to just pray. “I’mma just say this, a lot of times, organized religion and old-school thinking will have you in bondage to some very misogynistic beliefs and ideals. And so a man can do wrong a million times, and you should forgive him because that is the blank thing to do, right? It's the right thing to do. It's the Christian thing to do, it's the feminine thing to do, it's the wife thing to do, right?” She explained.
Photo by Santiago Felipe/Getty Images
“But what about all this stress and drama and all that whatever, and him knocking me upside my [head?] How much of that should I take before a grown-up realizes that I'm out of control and I need to get help? There's only so much you can do for somebody who doesn't see the error in their ways. I was a little bit embarrassed that it was happening to me."
She continued, “I present myself as this very strong [person,] which I am, but when you got somebody that's like 200 pounds coming at you, it's nothing you can do. Yeah, you want to leave. They follow you. It's very, very nasty. I don't wish it on anyone. It's not that I didn't want to leave, but the way that my life was set up, you don't expect the love of your life to turn into your enemy.”
The mother of one made a plan, which included becoming a successful singer as a way to finally leave. Because, as she said, “I just knew, like, no one's coming to save you. It was me who walked down the aisle, so I'm gonna have to figure out how to get up out of this.”
Back in 2022, the “Ruined Me” singer revealed she had lupus, and in 2023, she shared that she was autistic and that repressing her autism led to her having lupus. While talking to Terrell, she said she hasn’t had any flair-ups since leaving her relationship. If you or you know someone dealing with domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (800)-799-7233 or text START to 88788.
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“One song that just evokes a lot of emotion is the title track, “Revenge,” because I talk about some domestic violence there in the bridge. And I don't think a lot of people understand, like, I've been through a lot, and I just don't talk about it,” she revealed.
When asked how faith played a role during this turbulent time in her life, she shared how it was difficult as she was often told to just pray. “I’mma just say this, a lot of times, organized religion and old-school thinking will have you in bondage to some very misogynistic beliefs and ideals. And so a man can do wrong a million times, and you should forgive him because that is the blank thing to do, right? It's the right thing to do. It's the Christian thing to do, it's the feminine thing to do, it's the wife thing to do, right?” She explained.
Photo by Santiago Felipe/Getty Images
“But what about all this stress and drama and all that whatever, and him knocking me upside my [head?] How much of that should I take before a grown-up realizes that I'm out of control and I need to get help? There's only so much you can do for somebody who doesn't see the error in their ways. I was a little bit embarrassed that it was happening to me."
She continued, “I present myself as this very strong [person,] which I am, but when you got somebody that's like 200 pounds coming at you, it's nothing you can do. Yeah, you want to leave. They follow you. It's very, very nasty. I don't wish it on anyone. It's not that I didn't want to leave, but the way that my life was set up, you don't expect the love of your life to turn into your enemy.”
The mother of one made a plan, which included becoming a successful singer as a way to finally leave. Because, as she said, “I just knew, like, no one's coming to save you. It was me who walked down the aisle, so I'm gonna have to figure out how to get up out of this.”
Back in 2022, the “Ruined Me” singer revealed she had lupus, and in 2023, she shared that she was autistic and that repressing her autism led to her having lupus. While talking to Terrell, she said she hasn’t had any flair-ups since leaving her relationship. If you or you know someone dealing with domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (800)-799-7233 or text START to 88788.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images
London Alexaundria is the contributing editor for xoNecole. She is an alum of Clark Atlanta University, where she majored in Mass Media Arts and has worked in journalism for over ten years. You can follow her on Instagram and TikTok @theselfcarewriter
The Mecca Of Fashion: The Top Street Style Moments At Howard Homecoming
Outfits were planned, bags were packed, and cameras were ready to capture Howard University's collegiate spirit during its centennial Homecoming celebration. Not only does it hold the number one ranking as the most elite Historically Black College and University or its top performing academics, diversity of students and alumni, but the HBCU also leaves a legacy of style and grace.
The essence of effortless poise and refinement shines bright through the iconic university colors of indigo blue, red, and white. Every October, Howard University students, alumni, staff, and friends gather on the prestigious campus in Washington, D.C. to take part in time-honored traditions and events, which is Homecoming. This year's theme, “The Meccaverse,” was a week-long celebration of Howard University’s heritage, including the Homecoming football game and Bison Pep Rally, the Fashion Show, Greek Life Step Show, Homecoming Day of Service, Lavender Reception, and the iconic Yard Fest Concert.
As 2024 marked the 100th anniversary of the Howard Bison trek back to The Mecca and after two years of virtual events due to the COVID-19 pandemic, this was to be a celebration of a lifetime. We enlisted HU alumnus Sharmaine Harris, a luxury retail buyer, as she revisited her alma mater as eyes on the yard for fashion-forward outfits mixed with personal style and campus pride for the weeklong celebration.
Before we get to the looks, discover how attending Howard University impacted her career in fashion and her day-to-day style:
Credit: Sharmaine and Friends
xoNecole: Describe your personal style. Did attending Howard have any impact on developing it?
Sharmaine: Howard taught me that there’s no such thing as being TOO dressed. There’s always a reason to “put it on” and look presentable, even if it’s just for a day of classes. Standing out was celebrated and encouraged with my peers embracing the opportunity, giving me the confidence to try new styles and trends.
xoNecole: How did Howard shape your career as a luxury buyer?
Sharmaine: I studied Fashion Merchandising, through which I was fortunate to have professors who were very connected to the industry and able to give first-hand accounts of opportunities and what to expect post-college. I was also able to build a network through my peers and other Howard Alum, which has opened doors to endless possibilities both within fashion as well as daily life.
The same confidence instilled in me through my style has also been rooted deeply within me as I step into any role or project I’m faced with throughout my career.
xoNecole: This year marked Howard’s 100th-anniversary Homecoming celebration. Can you describe what the weekend looked and felt like?
Sharmaine: I’ve gone to many Howard Homecomings since graduating, but this year’s 100th anniversary felt like a huge family reunion filled with nothing but love. It was beautiful to see so many Bison return home looking great and radiating joy. It was beautiful!
xoNecole: What makes Howard fashion different from other HBCUs?
Sharmaine: Being that Howard is The Mecca, we have such a diverse population with each individual having their own spin on fashion. Getting dressed is second nature for us, but the layered confidence is our secret ingredient to make any look come together. Through that comfortability to push barriers, we have a legacy of setting trends, as indicated by the many alumni we have in the fashion and entertainment industry.
Keep scrolling for the top street style moments from The Mecca's Homecoming weekend:
Credit: Lacey Gallagher
Credit: Alan Henderson
Credit: JaLynn Davis
Credit: Dylan Davis
Credit: Caleb Smith
Credit: Kendall W.
Credit: Jordyn Finney
Credit: Vanessa Nneoma
Credit: Dr. Mariah Sankey-Thomas
Credit: Caleb MacBruce
Credit: Tiffany Battle
Credit: Teniola
Credit: Ilahi Creary
Credit: Nicolas Ryan Grant
Credit: Dylan Davis
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image courtesy of Sharmaine Harris
Why Denver Should Be On Your Travel List: A Black Woman’s Perspective
If someone had asked me if living in Denver, Colorado, for nearly seven years was on my Bingo card, I probably would have laughed in their face. But you know what they say: we make plans, and God laughs. Truth be told — moving to Denver was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I was able to find myself and my voice in a city that was somewhat foreign to me, and I am forever grateful.
Denver may not have the largest Black population, but its vibrant community offers plenty of ways to find connection, culture, and self-care. With less than 10 percent of the city's residents identifying as Black, it can sometimes feel challenging to find spaces that truly resonate. That’s why we wanted to offer a guide to help Black women navigate the city, find community, and experience everything the Mile High City has to offer.
Listen up sis, here's how you can live your best life in Denver.
Denver Travel: The City vs. The Mountains
Let’s start here because many people believe that Denver is in the mountains, and while that’s technically true, you still need to travel outside of the city to be in the mountains. Winter Park is a great place to do mountain activities and also see more Black folks. Strawberry Park Hot Springs has the most magical hot springs, as the snow-capped mountains serve as the perfect landscape.
Ski Noir 5280is a great resource for mountain tings as they are working hard to diversify the mountains. They offer training and equipment as a means of support so that more of us take over the slopes.
Wellness and Self-Care Experiences in Denver
Courtesy of Joce Blake
Denver has a variety of Black-owned businesses and wellness services designed to help you prioritize self-care. BodyLove by Tal, for example, offers organic skincare products created to heal, nourish, and restore your skin naturally. If you’re looking to reconnect with nature, the Potted Peace Project promotes racial healing through plant love, offering plants and nature-centered events.
If you're more into holistic wellness, Sound Baths with Courtneyoffers guided meditations and sound baths that can provide much-needed relaxation and healing energy.Urban Sanctuaryand Charismatic Movement Yogaalso offer yoga classes to help you find balance, both physically and emotionally.
Beauty and Haircare Services in Denver
Finding a trusted haircare provider can be essential to maintaining your confidence. Denver has a variety of Black-owned beauty salons, including B&B Beauty Supplyin Aurora, where you can find all your hair care needs, from extensions to braids. For specialized braiding, Tay, The Braid Bestie, is known for her work with knotless braids and feed-ins, offering services to both men and children.
If you're looking to keep your hair on point,Official Micahspecializes in sew-ins, frontal wigs, and high-quality hair products, whileStylez by J’Niceat Timeless Designs in Aurora offers a range of hairstyling services, from natural hair to weaves to a buss down boho knotless style. Janice has been getting me together for years, and I adore her hands.
Looking for a MUA? Tatiana Artistry and Angela Ranaeare the best to ever do it. And if you need your nails did, I only trust theNail Transformerswith my fingertips. They also offer pedicures, lash extensions, facials, and more.
Denver Cultural Activities and Nightlife
Denver offers a host of cultural events where Black women can connect and feel represented. One thing that shocked me when I first moved was that the Juneteenth Music Festivalis one of the city’s major cultural events, celebrating Black heritage with music, food, and community. For a unique art experience, visitThe Museum for Black Girls, which celebrates iconic moments in Black culture through its interactive selfie installations.
When it comes to nightlife, you’ll find some great spots catering to the Black community. If there’sMunchies & Mimosas happening while you’re in town, get that ticket. This event that mixes culture, cuisine, and music in one unforgettable experience. If you love a good night out, The Lobbyis another must-attend spot, where you can enjoy great music, hookah, bottle service, and a lively atmosphere.
Vibes in the Parkis also a wonderful space dedicated to connecting us with our roots. From park events to networking, it’s always a vibe with this gang.
If you’re into fashion, you’ll want to check outColor of Fashion. They are transforming the fashion industry by advancing inclusivity, diversity, and racial equality.
Honestly, if you’re looking for specific moves and vibes, follow the Mile High Tribeand Community Keison Instagram — they keep you up-to-date on the Black and brown spaces and events going down.
Shopping Black-Owned in Denver
Courtesy of Joce Blake
Supporting Black-owned businesses in Denver is easy, with several options around town.Be a Good Personoffers streetwear that promotes positivity, while Rachel Marie Hurst and M.Bolden Boutiqueprovide luxury fashion, including custom handmade pieces. For high-quality, eco-friendly apparel, check out The Common Collective, a Denver-based brand committed to sustainability and social impact.
Whether you're looking for unique clothing or just want to support local Black entrepreneurs, Denver's shopping scene has something for everyone.
Green Spacesis also an amazing community hub for Black and Brown folks. From Black & Blossomed, which serves up flowers for the culture to Migas Coffeewith the best matchas, it's a one-stop shop to grab some goodies and co-work.
Food for the Soul
Courtesy of Joce Blake
Denver’s food scene is as diverse as its community, with several Black-owned restaurants offering soul food, BBQ, and Southern cooking. Mattie's Soul Food is a family-owned spot that brings the flavors of the South to Denver, serving everything from collard greens to chicken and dressing. Another great spot is Saucy Southern, known for its delicious southern-style BBQ wings and soulful meals.
For brunch lovers,Mimosas is a retro-inspired restaurant that serves up creative comfort food alongside its namesake beverage. If you're craving a taste of New Orleans,Nola Jane’s, and Four Friends Kitchen have you covered with gumbo, po’boys, other classic dishes, and collard greens to die for.
Living your best life as a Black woman in Denver means finding spaces that celebrate your identity, support your wellness, and connect you with the community. Whether you’re indulging in self-care at a yoga class, enjoying a soulful meal, or dancing the night away, Denver has plenty to offer.
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Featured image courtesy of Joce Blake