Straight (or straighter) hair, within our community, is a very polarizing conversation right now.On one hand, some women are saying that they are tired of being natural all of the time, so they have returned to relaxers. At the same time, our country is taking note of how potentially damaging the white lye can be and so they are close toputting a ban on some of the ingredients that are in it.
One of my friends recently said, “What would people really do if relaxing their hair was no longer a real option?” I mean, flat ironing and silk presses exist. However, the first thing that came to my mind was that they should do what I’ve been doing for quite some time now — stretching their locks out.
If you get how that’s a viable option yet you’ve never really been fully sold on it because it hasn’t exactly worked out brilliantly for you, this article might be of interest to you. Why do I say that? Because something tells me that it’s not so much the method that may be the challenge — it just might be your approach.
Read on, and let’s see.
Why Should You Stretch Your Hair Out, Anyway?
*le sigh* Even though I am well aware of the fact that some people in the natural hair world frown upon stretching natural hair because, in their eyes, it’s a form of low-key self-hatred because they think it means that we’re not happy with our unstretched curly texture — I absolutely do not subscribe to any of that. As someone with a hybrid of 4a and 4b hair, I actually like the texture that comes from my hair being unstretched (especially now that I’ve finally found the products that complement my curls the most!).
For me, stretching my hair is about using it as a way to keep the damage down that comes with day-to-day styling (when it’s not in a protective style, of course). After all, it’s been proven that when natural hair is stretched, that decreases detangling issues, fairy knot problems, and applying unnecessary pressure on your hair to the point where it leads to potential breakage.
Plus, if you’re someone who struggles with keeping all of your strands — from the roots to the ends — fully moisturized, stretching your tresses can make that a lot easier to do, too.
So, if someone tries to heckle or debate you on why stretching natural hair should be an option, share this article with them. If they choose not to see all of these points as valid, they are intentionally choosing not to, chile.
The Various Ways to Stretch Your Hair Out
Something that’s really cool about hair stretching is there are several approaches that you can take to doing it. The following technically eight are the most popular and, honestly, the safest when it comes to protecting the integrity of your locks.
Blowout. I’m a huge fan of blowouts. Even though they sometimes get a bad rap, I’m not someone who thinks that heat is not our friend. It’s all about making sure your hair has its proper moisture, that you apply a thermal heat protectant, and that you use a blow dryer that doesn’t zap your hair of hydration or damage your strands (you can read about thathere and watch a video on the topichere). A blowout is not only one of the quickest and longer-lasting ways to stretch your hair, but it can also make some of the other stretch methods so much easier to do.
Cornrows. My hair is stretched out most of the time. What I will do on wash days is blow out my hair (if you want to reduce the potential for damage, make sure that your tresses are at least 50 percent dry before doing so), and then I will put my hair in cornrows at night (or underneath a headwrap). Not only do cornrows help to keep my stretched hair without the need for heat, but they are also a really cute style if you want to keep your hair stretched and your ends tucked at the same time.
Bantu knots. Personally, I’ve always liked the fact thatBantu knots hail from central and South Africa. A part of the reason why I dig it is because I know that Zulu means “of/from the heavens” (or a variation of that like “sky”). Anyway, something that is awesome about Bantu knots is you can wear the knots as a hairstyle and then take them down and use the results as a heat-free way to obtain stretched-out hair.
Braid-outs or (African)twist-outs. A common form of stretching out your natural texture of curls without straightening them all the way is to do a braid-out or a twist-out. These consist of applying product to your hair (usually while it’s still wet or damp) in sections as small as you want your wavy look to be. Then, you braid or twist each section, allow your hair to dry completely, and unravel each braid or curl with your fingers. While I’m on this one, hands down, the best cream that I’ve come across to achieve this look isTaliah Waajid Curly Curl Cream. It’ll change y’all life, chile. No exaggeration!
Banding orthreading. Banding is something that I’ve only tried a couple of times; it does work, though. If you’re not familiar, it’s all about using hair ties along sections of your hair in order to stretch your hair as you let it dry (preferably air dry). Threading (more specifically,African threading) is actually seen as a protective style and a way to stretch your hair by using black thread (or any color you wish, actually) to wrap the sections of your hair from the root down to the ends.
Roller sets. Putting your hair in rollers after washing and (deep) conditioning it is another way to stretch your hair out. For this, some people use traditional rollers, while others opt forspiral curlers. The main thing to remember with this method is, that if you want to reduce frizzing, you definitely should apply a setting lotion first. And please make sure that your ends are wrapped well. Ain’t nothin’ like some curls that have straight ends. Ugh. And SMDH.
5 Hair Stretching Hacks That Can Get You the Results You Want
Okay, so now that we’ve unpacked what hair stretching is and some of the most popular ways that you can go about stretching out your own tresses, let me get into some things that, if you’re not doing them, could prevent you from getting the results that you’ve been looking for. Ready?
1. Make sure your hair has protein and (high) moisture. When you decide to stretch your hair, you are pulling on your hair strands; there’s no way around the fact that, if you’re not careful, that type of manipulation could lead to breakage. That’s why it’s important that yougive your hair a protein treatment approximately every 4-6 weeks and that you deep condition your hair on every wash day. Protein will help to keep your hair strong. Hydration will help your hair to have elasticity and reduce frizz.
2. Keep heat to a minimum. Again, for the skeptics in the back, I am absolutely not the person who is anti-heat. Honestly, back when I was trying to be like the YouTube naturalistas and go without any at all, that is when I was having the most trouble with styling my hair. For me, what has worked is blowing my hair out on wash days to stretch it and then keeping my hair in some sort of cornrow style whenever I’m not wearing my hair out. In between wash days (which is like every 11-21 days), I might apply heat once more, and that’s it.
The moral to the story here: whatever stretching method you decide to go with, the less heat, the better because your hair needs to maintain as much moisture as possible and heat has a way of zapping it off that.
3. Baby your ends. Something that I really had to learn the hard way was that if I wanted to get some real length retention, I needed to be super intentional about giving my ends some TLC on a consistent basis. This includes keeping your ends even (whether that’s by cutting, trimming, or, my personal favorite,dusting), moisturized (I try and apply a bit of leave-in conditioner to my ends every night), and sealing them on wash days (you can learn more about how to do thathere).
Please hear me loud and clear when I say that if you omit this, you will struggle with getting (or maintaining) inches because if your edges aren’t in good shape, they will probably snap off or turn into split ends if you keep stretching them out (because they will either become too dry or too weak).
4. Use hair stretching products. Out of all of the things that I’ve said thus far, hands down, the biggest “mistake” that (many) people make when they set out to stretch out their hair is they don’t consider applying products that are specifically designed to help them out in that department. For instance, one of my absolute faves is COLOR WOW’s Dream Coat. Although I used to think it was for “them” (LOL), it actually works really well on “us” too as a straightening serum and anti-frizz spray.
A few others that I have tried that have given humidity a finger as far as frizz goes includeNexxus's Ultralight Smooth Hair Serum,L’Oreal’s Paris Blow Dry Primer, andNexxus’s Smooth & Full Blow Dry Balm. Although there are PLENTY of others out here, those are the ones that I can personally vouch for that help to smooth out your cuticles, keep your hair manageable, and are able to “weigh your strands down” a bit, so that you’re able to stretch your hair out with ease and maintain the look for much longer than without any product use at all.
5. Remember that “the excess of a virtue is a vice.” Probably, for the rest of my life, one of my favorite quotes will be an Aristotle one that basically says that the excess of a virtue is a vice. What that boils down to is even good things done in excess can ultimately end up working against you in the long run. Keeping that very valid point in mind, even if you are a fan of stretching your hair, just make sure that you are manipulating your hair as little as possible, and sometimes you do give it a break with some protective styling or awash ‘n go.
That way, your hair will remain strong in between stretches — so that the “elongated look” will always be both beautiful and hair-beneficial as well. Happy stretching, sis!
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
There’s just something about HBCU Homecoming that just hits different. Whether it’s your first time stepping onto the yard since graduation or you’re a regular at every Homecoming tailgate, HBCU pride is undeniable. It’s a vibrant celebration that unites the legacy of excellence and tradition with the energy and resilience of Black culture.
The experience goes beyond a typical college reunion; HBCU Homecoming is a family reunion, a fashion show, a cultural festival, and a week-long turn-up that embodies what it means to be unapologetically Black and educated. For HBCU alumni, the journey back to the yard each year is rooted in a love and pride that’s hard to put into words but impossible to deny.
From statement pieces to tech must-haves, every item represents the intersection of Black pride and HBCU love, ensuring that you show up to the yard in style and with intention. So whether you’re repping your alma mater for the first time since graduation or looking for fresh pieces to express your HBCU pride, these essentials will have you standing out, because, at HBCU Homecoming, it’s not just about showing up—it’s about showing out.
Thread Goals
diarrablu Jant Pants in Alia Noir
High-waisted, wide-legged, and ready to shut down the yard, the Jant Pants by diarrablu bring a whole new meaning to campus chic. Handcrafted in Dakar, Senegal, these free-flowing jacquard pants are perfect for stepping onto the yard with style and ease—making them a must-have for any HBCU alum’s closet.
Silver & Riley Convertible Executive Leather Bag Classic Size in Olive
This all-in-one luxury bag isn’t a bestseller for nothing. The Silver & Riley essential is made of Italian calfskin leather and thoughtfully designed, as it can be worn in four different ways: a shoulder bag, crossbody, a top handle, and a backpack. Chic and elegant, the Convertible Executive Leather bag is “the bag that every woman needs in her collection.”
Renowned Women's Intuition Cotton Graphic T-Shirt
Renowned
Renowned’s Women’s Intuition Cotton Graphic T-shirt features a bold graphic print inspired by the power and essence of women’s intuition. With its striking design, this all-cotton tee is a vibrant thing, making it a statement piece that celebrates feminine energy.
Mifland Million M Mesh Crop Shirt
Talk about bold, the Million M Mesh Crop Shirt combines edgy style with comfort, featuring Mifland’s signature print on a semi-see-through mesh fabric. Show up and show out in sophisticated flair.
HBCU Love FUBU
Melanin Is Life Melanated & Educated - I Love My HBCU Hoodie
Show off your HBCU love with this piece that represents everything you gained from your alma mater: a top-tier education, a community that lifts you up, and a deep sense of esteem for yourself and your culture. Wear it loud and proud, because being melanated and educated isn’t just a flex—it’s a legacy.
HBCU Culture Spelmanite Sweatshirt in Navy
Spelmanites, rep your Spelman pride with this unisex crewneck sweatshirt, designed for ultimate comfort and a relaxed fit. Made from a cozy cotton/polyester blend, this classic sweatshirt is as durable as it is stylish—making it an ideal piece for any Spelmanite showing love for their alma mater.
HBCU Culture Howard Is The Culture T-Shirt
Rock the ultimate flex by showcasing your Howard U love with HBCU Culture’s Howard Is The Culture t-shirt. This unisex tee offers a comfortable, relaxed fit that’s perfect for celebrating your HBCU spirit without sacrificing style or comfort.
DungeonForward FAMU - Strike Bucket - Reversible
DungeonForward’s Strike Bucket Hat brings versatility and style to the FAMU Crown collection with its reversible design, giving you two looks in one. Featuring a sleek black snakeskin-embossed brim lining and a bold outline Rattler emblem, this hat is all about repping your Rattler pride in style.
DungeonForward Savannah State University - HBCU Hat - TheYard
The Savannah State University HBCU Hat by DungeonForward is more than just a hat—it’s a symbol of Tiger pride and a nod to the culture. Perfect for gamedays, tailgates, or just showing off your HBCU love, this hat lets you carry a piece of the yard wherever you go.
Tech the Halls
Anker iPhone 16 Portable Charger, Nano Power Bank
Stay charged up with the Anker Nano Power Bank, which features dual USB-C ports, a foldable connector, and a compact design, making it perfect for those HBCU tailgates and late-night parties you pull up to.
Drip Check
Wisdom Frame 14 Square Sunglasses
Elevate your look with these angular square-frame sunglasses by Wisdom, bringing an ultramodern edge to any outfit. The sleek design makes them perfect for blocking out the haters while you stunt on the yard.
Coco and Breezy Eyewear Fortune in Gray Turquoise
The Fortune Glasses in Grey Turquoise is a bold statement piece to any Homecoming weekend ‘fit that “embody our fearless and outspoken DNA.” With their color and edgy design, these frames by Coco and Breezy are perfect for anyone looking to stand out and express their unapologetic confidence.
Howard U Lapel Pin
Rep your Bison pride wherever you go with this Howard U Lapel Pin from Pretty AmbVision. Whether adding it to your jacket, shirt, or bag, this pin is the perfect way to showcase your love for your alma mater while rocking your HBCU love with honor and distinction.
Mifland Standard Rucksack Mini
The Standard Rucksack is designed to evolve like that HBCU pride—getting richer, bolder, and better with time. Durable, stylish, and built to last, this Rucksack by Mifland is a timeless piece equipped with versatile carrying options and fully adjustable back straps for ultimate comfort.
Stay Fresh, Stay Blessed
Slip Pure Silk Sleep Mask in Pink
Keeping it cute starts with beauty sleep. This luxurious silk mask is an essential for a reason. If protecting your skin and waking up refreshed is your priority, look no further than this Homecoming essential.
Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier Lemon Lime - Hydration Powder Packets
Stay hydrated and energized throughout Homecoming weekend with this Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier in Lemon Lime. Just add a packet to your water bottle, and bless your body with 2-3 times more hydration than water with every packet. Because staying hydrated is the key to popping up and showing out all weekend long!
Loop Experience Plus Earplugs High Fidelity Hearing Protection
Designed for your hearing protection, these sleek earplugs reduce noise without compromising sound quality—perfect for enjoying the band’s halftime show, late-night parties, and DJ sets. Whether you’re front row at the step show or hitting the yard, your ears deserve to be protected in style!
Black Girl Magic Glass Cup
Sip in style and celebrate your melanin with the Black Girl Magic Glass Cup. Perfect for morning coffee, your favorite iced drink, or showing off your HBCU pride on the yard—this cup is all about keeping it cute while radiating your endless supply of Black Girl Magic.
Glow Up & Show Out
Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30
What Homecoming weekend can be complete without an assist from this beauty find? Formulated to blend seamlessly into melanin-rich skin (no white-cast), protect your glow while you turn up with the Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30.
Sienna Naturals Issa Rae's Wash Day Ritual Set
Issa Rae’s Wash Day Ritual Set from Sienna Naturals includes the H.A.PI. Shampoo, the Plant Power Repair Mask, Dew Magic, and Lock and Seal to get your crown right. Whether you’re repping your coils or rocking a new color on the yard, these products restore and nourish your strands, keeping your hair healthy, strong, and Homecoming-ready!
54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter
Stay glowing from the tailgate to the after-party with the 54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter. Infused with African-sourced ingredients, this rich, multi-purpose butter is the answer to keeping your skin soft and radiant through all the festivities all Homecoming long.
Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil
Keep your lips looking luscious and nourished with the Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil. Perfect for adding an extra pop to your pout before hitting the yard or freshening up between events, this lip oil is a beauty essential for staying camera-ready all weekend.
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image by Visual Vic/Getty Images
The James Room’s Co-Owner Justin Miller On Inclusive Nightlife & Atlanta’s Growing Cultural Scene
The career path we choose sometimes presents itself to us during our childhood. One entrepreneur's desire to maintain and run his own business began around age 12.
Justin Miller, one half of the duo responsible for running Atlanta’s premiere gathering place, The James Room, began his entrepreneurial pursuits by selling his drawings at school.
“I think I was always an entrepreneur,” he tells xoNecole during an interview for Hyundai’s Best In Class series, highlighting entrepreneurs making a difference through their businesses who also happen to be HBCU alumni.
“I just had different hustles, as they call them, growing up. When I went to law school, that was my first big entrepreneurship. I started my own law firm right after law school in 2006, and I’ve been an adult entrepreneur ever since.”
Alongside his business partner, Harold “Poncho” Brinkley, Miller and his team aim to fill a niche that hasn’t been seen before in Atlanta—an upscale lounge environment that is diverse and in alignment with what is currently available to patrons in cities like New York, Los Angeles, or Chicago. Located in Atlanta’s Krog Street District, The James Room offers a wide range of entertainment. From weekly events like live music on Tuesdays, slow jams by a live DJ set on Wednesdays, and b-side vibes on Saturdays.
“People are a little bit segregated in Atlanta,” Miller explains. “People party separately. People hang out separately. So, we wanted to create a space where everyone could come together and enjoy life because we all love the same things, and there shouldn’t really be separation when people are trying to relax and have fun.
"The James Room fills that niche, and Poncho and I, when we started thinking about getting into this field, both of us enjoyed that type of thing. We both enjoyed environments where people are together and enjoying each other’s company, and it’s not separated by Black and white or age, that kind of thing, more just people who enjoy good, fun stuff.”
“People are a little bit segregated in Atlanta. People party separately. People hang out separately. So, we wanted to create a space where everyone could come together and enjoy life because we all love the same things, and there shouldn’t really be separation when people are trying to relax and have fun.
As a product of Morehouse College, Miller also shared how being a graduate of a historically Black college or university (HBCU) has played a significant role in his work as an entrepreneur.
“My network started from, of course, Morehouse, and then branched off to Clark Atlanta, Morris Brown, Spelman, those schools close to Morehouse,” says Miller. “When I was there and made the connections that you need to be an entrepreneur, I think that the network you get when you go to an HBCU is second to none for anybody, but especially a Black person trying to start their own business.”
He adds, “The network you get at Morehouse for a Black man is even double because it’s like becoming a member of the network and a member of a fraternity simultaneously. So you can reach out to people vertically and horizontally, and you all share the same background in a certain way, so people will listen to you that normally would not.”
By day, Miller’s passion for law shines brightly through his work at his law firm, Stewart Miller Simmons, which he and a few friends started with a people-first mindset. One of their first big cases involved representing the daughter of George Floyd after he was murdered by Minneapolis police officers in 2020.
In addition to that high-profile case, Miller shares that the team has also represented the family of Rayshard Brooks, the young Black man who was killed by police in front of an Atlanta Wendy’s restaurant. They’ve also represented the mother of Ahmaud Arbery, the 25-year-old who was killed by two white men while jogging in a neighborhood near Brunswick in Glynn County, Georgia.
“We have some of the biggest cases in the world,” says Miller, reflecting on the nature of his business within the law field. “But my passion, the thing that I love the most, is doing things like The James Room, being able to create things where I can go myself and decompress, So I know if I like it in the environment, it’s good, and it’s relaxing for me, I know it will be for everyone else. This is one of my driving forces.”
Miller’s biggest lesson as a business owner, especially regarding The James Room, is that "you can really have whatever you want.”
“You can do whatever you want. It just requires a commensurate amount of work,” says Miller. It’s completely up to you. If you outwork yourself, you will receive everything you want. If you don’t, then you’re going to see where you’re going to stay and where your business will stay. I played basketball in college, and after that, I learned that you have to work. I didn’t know that same philosophy worked in business the same exact way, but it does.”
When it comes to the legacy that he and Poncho aim to leave behind with The James Room, the sentiment is simple: They want the business to be remembered as providing a different type of space in Atlanta.
"If you outwork yourself, you will receive everything you want. If you don’t, then you’re going to see where you’re going to stay and where your business will stay. I played basketball in college, and after that, I learned that you have to work. I didn’t know that same philosophy worked in business the same exact way, but it does.”
“I don’t want it to be the last of that type of space or one of the few of that type of space. I’d like it to be the beginning of those types of spaces in the city,” Miller notes. “Atlanta is growing. It’s now very multicultural because I am from here. My family’s from Atlanta. I grew up between Athens and Atlanta, Georgia. So I’ve seen Atlanta grow from where it used to be to what it is now.”
“I want the legacy of The James Room to be as Atlanta grows into the multicultural, big city that it is turning into, that the nightlife also corresponds and gives people options other than hookah and chicken wings. There’s nothing wrong with hookah and chicken wings, but you should have other options… sometimes you might just want an espresso martini.”
As their business continues to serve young professionals and creatives alike, Miller and Poncho take pride in continuously creating a place where everyone can come together, mix, and mingle, but in a more relaxed setting where everyone’s story can be heard.
“What I would ultimately like to see for The James Room is it being a nationwide brand. A brand where you could put a James Room in Houston, or you could put a James Room in Nashville,” Miller concludes. “You could put a James Room anywhere because all these places need this type of nightlife. Also, the entrepreneurs there, the people doing the nightlife there, need to see that this thing can work.”
He adds, “We have a proof of concept, and I believe the world needs to see and have it. I am a person who believes that more is better. So if you have more people putting this kind of entertainment out for consumption, you’ll have more people who have choices and more people who can enjoy themselves differently than what’s normally offered to them in their city.”
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Feature image @jmilleresq/ Instagram