You know what's better than a plentiful bank account, nice clothes in your closet, or even a ton of followers on the 'gram? Peace of mind that everything that belongs to you, will be for you.
It can sometimes feel like God has forgotten about you — everyone else is leveling up in their careers or relationships, and you're over in the corner just wondering what's supposed to be happening next. Trust me, I understand.
For years, I hustled and hustled and hustled, grinding to be taken seriously in my industry, oftentimes putting in the grunt work while I looked to my left and to my right and saw people passing me up the ladder because they knew someone, had "the look," or just knew how to finesse. I learned about betrayal the hard way, first-person and up close, as I saw people who welcomed me into their circles only to see what resource I could provide to them.
It is inherently a hard lesson for anyone to learn, especially a person such as myself who genuinely tries to see the good in people and will extend herself to the ends of the Earth to help others.
I found myself looking in the mirror, asking God where was I coming up short, how was I not progressing like others, and why the same people I saw cutting others down were being praised while my work was still unknown and unseen?
Exodus 14:14 says that God will fight for you, but the only thing you have to do is be still.
So often, I feel like we're taught to grind and hustle, always fighting for the next moment and the next thing. However, His promise to us already confirms that He will fight your battles: the naysayers, the haters, the stressful person on your job, that family member, that money situation, etc. And so often, we get caught up in fighting and pushing, that we stand in our own ways of success and promise. When I learned that God was literally just waiting on me to step back and trust him with the situation, that's when my life turned around in ways that offered me imminent knowledge of the power He holds.
When you remember, and I mean TRULY remember, what God has promised for you, you stop worrying about everyone else.
People who used to be able to provoke your spirit can't shift your mood anymore. People who put on a flex for social media don't upset you anymore. Because you know that God will honor YOU and your requests made onto Him, especially when you've put in the work, he's not going to pass you over.
Okay, let me break it down just a bit for anyone out there who currently finds themselves in a situation where you feel like God isn't looking out for you or that He doesn't see your problems. When you are walking in the fullness of God and what you know He can do for you, certain situations and people become trivial. Almost like, worrying about something the size of an ant when you have an entire world or continent to study.
When you understand how things are meant to work for your good, you will see that things really don't have to upset you.
You don't have to operate at a low frequency to get the things you want out of life because you already know that they are going to be yours when the time is right. You don't have to get caught up in small or trivial things when you think about all that God has for you in the long run. I realized that the world can give you a lot of things, but it can't give you peace. It can't earn you respect or honor. I will proudly take a peaceful mind over a buzzing social thread, or popularity that is fleeting.
At the end of the day, God's looking out for you, so don't worry about what everyone else is doing. Don't worry if you don't have what you think the "perfect" life is yet, or are where you want to be in life.
Just do what you're supposed to do, so that you're where you need to be when He's ready to shower you down with blessings!
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Again, the answer never changes because, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna get, it’s 6-8 (sometimes nine) hours of sleep. However, since my chronotype (check out “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”) means that I like/prefer to write in the wee hours of the morning, sometimes I will sleep for the night for five hours and take a nap in the day. And y’all, that is just fine with me because I am well aware of the fact that napping does everything from give me more energy, heighten my alertness and even make me more creative to decrease stress levels, strengthen immunity, and reduce my chances of experiencing a heart attack or stroke.
My problem is I will oftentimes go “overboard” with my daytime zzz’s. What I mean by that is, in order to get the most out of a nap, they say thatyou shouldn’t sleep for longer than 25 minutes or so; otherwise, you could wake up feeling sluggish (I don’t but…). Also, it can make resting, soundly, at night a bit of a struggle.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? We should get quickies in? Yeah. And it’s funny that the word “quickie” would come up because just like a sex quickie can do wonders for you (and it can — check out “12 Super Solid Reasons To Have A Quickie Every Single Day”), it’s a full-circle moment when I say that something that can improve the quality of your sex life is to have a power nap (a nap that lasts between 10-30 minutes).
Wanna know how the two things correlate? Honestly, it’s no secret that sleep and sex work together to optimize both (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”). Today, though, we’re going to tap into how a nap, specifically, can have you partaking in some of the best sex that you’ve experienced in a minute. I’ll explain.
Naps Reduce Stress
GiphyIf you’re feeling super stressed out right now, you are not alone. There is plenty of data out here that says that most of us are stressed for at least a couple of reasons at a time — and that can impact your sexual health on a few levels. For one thing, it can bring about feelings of depression and/or anxiety. Stress can also throw your hormone levels off (including your cycle) which can weaken your libido. Stress can make you want to put distance between you and your partner (yes, literally).
Stress can also make it challenging to get aroused or to have an orgasm. And just what can help to decrease stress? Taking a nap. Since sleep has a way of helping you to “get off of the clock” and relax a bit, that can lower your stress levels and “reset” your body so that you are calmer — and that, in turn, can do wonders for your sex drive and ultimately your sex life.
Naps Improve Your Mood
GiphyThere is one person in my life, and fairly 80 percent of the time, she’s in a super good mood. Oh, but let that girl go without sleep, and…who is this woman? LOL. There’s research behind why this happens. When a person is sleep-deprived, it messes with their brain chemicals, and that can amplify emotions like anger, restlessness and sadness. In fact, one study revealed that people who had their sleep disrupted throughout the night, they ended up having their positive outlook on life reduced by about 30 percent.
And geeze, who wants to have sex when they’re not feeling very good? Anyway, since serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps to regulate your moods, your sleep patterns, and your libido and sleep is what helps to keep it in balance — by taking a nap, not only can it help you to feel better, it can also increase your desire for sex (it can also build up your endurance which is also…sexually beneficial).
Naps Increase Your Focus and Concentration
GiphySomething that some of my clients bring up is how, when it comes to having sex, sometimes the flesh is willing while the spirit is weak because, although the desire for intimacy is there, so much is going on that they aren’t able to get still enough to focus on experiencing copulation with their partner. This also tracks because, when you don’t have enough rest, your brain finds itself not working in harmony and that can make it hard to do everything from approaching life with a sense of flexibility to making necessary decisions.
Certain data also reveal that a lack of rest can cause you to have a really poor attention span and not process things in context (the more you know). So, if you really want to get some yet it’s hard for you to focus long enough to make it happen, ask your bae to lie down with you and take a nap. Between the sleep and the snuggling (check out “Fall's Coming: 8 Wonderful Health Benefits Of Cuddling”) — you may wake up with your mind and body totally on the same page. #wink
Naps Can Make You Feel Better About Your Body
GiphyEven if, overall, you feel really good about your body, I think that we all have moments when we feel less attractive than others — and who wants to have sex when they don’t really feel…very sexy? Well, something else that sleep, in general, can do is increase your confidence in your body.
For one thing, if you want to lose a few pounds, sleep can actually make that happen by helping your body metabolize the glucose (sugar) that’s in it so that you can better manage your appetite. Other studies go on to share that since sleep deprivation can impact one’s mental health and emotional stability in a negative way, of course, getting enough rest would increase body positivity.
Shoot, science even goes so far as to say that insomnia can cause people to have an elevated level of dissatisfaction when it comes to their body image. Don’t take their word for it, though. Look in the mirror before a nap. Then look in a mirror after waking up from me. Do you feel better? I’d be surprised if you don’t.
Makes Your Brain Bigger…Which Could Make Your Orgasms Better
GiphyI saved the best for last by design. Now if you’re wondering how in the world a nap can improve (and possibly increase) your orgasms — oh, there is a method to the madness…trust. For starters, the saying that your biggest sex organ is your brain? That isn’t a myth. Long story less long, the brain is what houses your central nervous system and that is what controls how men and women sexually function (yes, literally).
And since the brain also releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin during sex and brain activity significantly increases in women during sexual activity (especially right before she orgasms) — well, would it trip you out to know that when you take a nap, your brain actually expands? A bigger brain (that’s healthy) can potentially intensify your sexual experiences (and your climaxes) — and who doesn’t want that to go down?
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Like I said earlier, I never have to be convinced to get a nap in. However, if your sex life has been a bit stagnant lately, you’ve been feeling a little sluggish and you’re not sure what to do — I’m hoping that a nap can get you right.
There’s enough science to prove that it can. All you need to do is give it a shot.
Now where’s your pillow and sleep mask, chile?
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