This TikToker Makes Relatable Content For Women Who Consider Themselves Late Bloomers
Krystal is tired of people telling her why she’s single. “People have shitty advice for late bloomers,” the 23-year-old tells xoNecole. “'There’s something you’re doing wrong’ or ‘how can you change yourself,’” she says are just some of the things she has been told when she confesses to being delayed romantically.
On her TikTok, Krystal has built a modest following not only from videos of her singing and sharing her music but from talking about her life as a self-described late bloomer. “A late bloomer can be defined as someone who starts dating later than the average age of dating,” she says in response to someone asking her what exactly a late bloomer is.
@its_kkryss Sorry if I’ve been sounding emo lately im not emo but I have a lot more time to process things/enjoy talking about real shit on here #blackgirl #latebloomer #dating #datingculture #hookupculture #blackwomen #rant #letmetalk #fyp
In recent years, the discussions surrounding romantic loneliness have put men squarely at the center of the topic. It was on one of my many TikTok rabbit holes a few years ago, however, when I stumbled across a community of Black women who, like Krystal, express their frustrations with having to find love and romance later in life.
“I think there's a part of me that feels like what I desire is unrealistic as I get older,” says another young Black woman who wanted to remain anonymous that xoNecole spoke to. Unlike other late bloomers, this young woman has been in a relationship, including one that ended only eight months ago, but she says she felt unfulfilled in part because of feeling pressured by societal standards to get into a relationship. “Though I identify as a Black feminist, embarrassingly I still fell tragedy to the pressures around age and relationships for women,” she says.
Krystal has made several attempts at putting herself out there including going on dating apps which she says has only made her uncomfortable. “People are kind of like bolder [on dating apps],” she says. “In real life, when I’m out and about, those kinds of people would not be walking up to me.”
Talking with her friends hasn’t helped either Krystal confesses. “I made a TikTok last year about how hard it is opening up to your non-late bloomer friends about being a late bloomer,” she says. “Some of my friends have no issue getting a date at all and they just insist I give attention to any guy at all.” This has also included friends attempting to set her up on dates with men she has no interest in or trying to pass off men they have rejected. “The guys that they turn down [weren’t] up to their standards but because I don’t get any attention, I should give them attention?” Krystal asks.
A few people have also suggested she move from the predominately white city she lives in to a Blacker city like Atlanta. “Financially I can’t do that, but also that depresses me because there’s tons of people who don’t need to move to find love.”
Krystal says that through posting videos online she has been able to connect with other Black women who are late bloomers. “My followers are really random people,” she says. “I think a lot of people find my late bloomer TikToks on the for you page.” She continues, “And so it's just people telling their own personal stories and that's really empowering. I've had people say like, I'm so grateful I found this video because now I can meet other people who are going through this. I had no idea.”
In recent months, Krystal says she’s felt less sad about being a late bloomer in part because of her self-love journey, which she acknowledges can also come off as patronizing advice to other late bloomers. “When you’re not getting this attention, you start to think that there’s something wrong with you, but knowing that there’s nothing wrong with you.”
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Feature image by @its_kkryss/ Instagram
Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
Calling All Lovers: October London, Tamar Braxton & Ro James Deliver A Soulful Serenade
If there was ever a night to pull out your best leather jacket, call up an old flame, and lean into your soft, sultry era, The October Nights: Calling All Lovers tour was it.
Presented by Black Promoters Collective, the show brought an evening of lush vocals, smooth grooves, and unapologetic grown-folks business to Atlanta—with Ro James, Tamar Braxton, and the man of the hour, October London, leading the charge. The energy? Sensual. The vibe? Intoxicating (literally and figuratively—more on that in a minute).
Ro James kicked off the night with his signature raspy vocals and a cool confidence that immediately set the tone. While “Permission” was the undeniable crowd favorite (with couples slow-dancing in their seats and people swaying with their phones in the air), he also dug deeper into his catalog, delivering seductive mid-tempos and moody ballads that reminded us he’s not a one-hit wonder—he’s a whole vibe.
Next up, Tamar Braxton took the stage with diva energy and vocal acrobatics that had the crowd on their feet. Her set was a perfect mix of emotion and edge—songs like “My Man,” “All the Way Home,” and “Love & War” hit every heartstring, but she didn’t stop there.
Tamar tapped into her earlier work, showing her full vocal range and reminding everyone that she’s one of the most powerful voices of her generation. Between tracks, she got personal with the audience, sharing laughs and stories like we were all cousins at the family reunion.
Oh—and in case you missed it: “Braxtons are coming back.” 👀 Consider that a soft launch if we’ve ever heard one.
Then came the velvet king himself: October London.
From the moment he stepped on stage, it felt like time slowed down. Backed by a silky live band and powerhouse background vocalists The Shindellas — Kaso, Stacy, and Tam, October’s set was pure R&B indulgence.
He opened with songs like “She Keeps Calling” and “Make Me Wanna,” blending retro soul with modern sensuality. Every note was intentional, every lyric soaked in emotion.
“Touch On Me” and “3rd Shift” had the crowd in a trance, while “Lovers Interlude” and “You Look Better” brought things to a tender, candlelit close.
And because this is October London we’re talking about—of course, he came with the charm. “If I come down there and sing with you,” he teased one woman in the front row, “you gon’ get pregnant.” The entire room screamed.
He also took a moment to introduce his newest venture—a signature whiskey that he’s currently promoting on tour. Smooth music, smooth vocals, smooth whiskey? A trifecta for the grown and sexy.
To top off the night, there was even a surprise pop-up from Tyrese, sending the crowd into full nostalgic overload.
By the end of the night, it was clear: this wasn’t just a concert—it was a love letter to R&B. The October Nights: Calling All Lovers tour captured the essence of grown-up intimacy, storytelling, and soul. No gimmicks. Just real voices, real feelings, and really good music.
If October London is the future of modern soul, we’re all in.
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Feature image by Geoffrey Clowes/ Shutterstock