Awards season is upon us, ladies. As we usher in 2019, awards season gives us the chance to look back and celebrate the previous year's outstanding performances and achievements in Hollywood.
First up: the 76th annual Golden Globe Awards airing this Sunday, January 6.
From the Whoopis and the Denzels to the Lupitas and Donald's, every year we're doing like Issa does: rooting for everybody Black. This year is no exception.
Speaking of Lupita Nyong'o, she, alongside Chadwick Boseman and Michael B. Jordan, were announced as presenters this year. I, for one, can't wait to see her notorious red-carpet slayage. The three will be pulling double-duty on Sunday night as Black Panther has been nominated for Best Motion Picture, Drama. Arguably the biggest film of the year, Black Panther shattered the box office worldwide. And if this film wasn't a first for so many other reasons, it is also the first superhero movie to ever be nominated in this category: big ups to Ryan Coogler for this historic moment, which only adds to our Wakanda pride.
A still from 'Black Panther'
The Hollywood Foreign Press announced these other extended family members as presenters during Sunday's live telecast: Taraji P. Henson (Golden Globe Winner, Empire, 2016), Halle Berry (Winner, Introducing Dorothy Dandridge, 2000), Sterling K. Brown (Winner, This Is Us, 2018), Idris Elba (Winner, Luther, 2012), Octavia Spencer (Winner, The Help, 2012), and Lena Waithe.
I often view The Golden Globes as the set up for what's to come during awards season, and if the nominations list is any indication, If Beale Street Could Talk should be on everyone's radar. Nominated for Best Motion Picture, Drama, Barry Jenkins also received a nod for Best Screenplay while Regina King is nominated Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in Any Motion Picture for the film. Regina is also nominated for Best Actress in a Limited-Series or TV Movie for Seven Seconds. Wins here are sure to be icing on the proverbial cake for Regina who won the Emmy last year for her role in Seven Seconds.
A still from 'If Beale Street Could Talk'
Despite mixed reactions and reviews, Green Book has been nominated for Best Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy, and Mahershala Ali has been nominated for Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in any Motion Picture for his role in the film. This is the second nomination for Mahershala, as he is also the first Muslim actor to ever win an Academy Award. May the odds be in his favor.
One of the most recognizable directors of our time, Mr. Spike Lee, is also nominated for Best Director for the film BlacKkKlansman. While he's won several Emmys and various other awards, a major award for one of his films still eludes him. I'm willing to bet that his time has finally come with BlacKkKlansman, which is also nominated for Best Motion Picture, Drama.
A still from 'BlacKkKlansman'
The film also has another nomination to celebrate and that is the first nod for actor John David Washington. Nominated for Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama (BlacKkKlansman), John David is obviously following in his father Denzel's footsteps. The apple sure doesn't fall far from the tree in the talent (and looks) department. But if you let him tell it, he gets it from his momma. Swoon.
The award nominations for television is stacked with melanin, too. Pose received a nomination for Best Television Series, and if you let Twitter tell it, it deserves to win. Multi-hyphenate Donald Glover has been nominated again for Best Actor in a TV Series, Comedy for his role in Atlanta for which he took home The Globe back in 2017. Donald has previously won two Emmy awards, one for acting and one for directing the hit show.
A still from 'Atlanta: Robbin Season'
For you Homecoming fans, keep an eye out for Stephan James who is nominated Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series, Drama. This is his first Golden Globe nomination. Our girl Thandie Newton has been nominated for Best Supporting Actress in a Series, Limited-Series, or TV Movie for her role in Westworld for which she was nominated for in 2017 and actually won the Emmy for in 2018.
Black Panther also received two additional nominations in the music department. "All The Stars" featuring Kendrick Lamar and SZA has been nominated for Best Original Song. The win would be the first win for either artist in the movie realm. The blockbuster is also nominated for Best Original Score, and if they take home The Globe, it will be the first for a black artist since Isaac Hayes won in 1972 for the score for Shaft.
From the glitz and glamour, to the wins and the potential meme-inducing moments, I live for awards season. It will be interesting to see who wins, who gets snubbed, and who gives the most epic acceptance speech a lá Oprah.
The 76th annual Golden Globes airs on NBC at 8 p.m. ET/5 p.m. PT, live from the Beverly Hilton in Los Angeles, on Sunday, January 6.
Featured image by 'If Beale Street Could Talk'/Still.
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That’s why, when one couple came to me and asked what was something that they could do to light the fire (pun intended) in their own bedroom, the first thing that I asked was if they had ever tried wax play before. You should’ve seen the expression on their faces. LOL.
When it comes to things like that, I think that it’s still taboo for some, simply because they’ve only seen it on a movie screen or heard about it in true extreme sexual contexts — and so, they don’t think that it’s something that is “for them” when, the reality is, with the right tips in tow, wax play can be for pretty much anyone…and everyone.
So today, let’s add something new to some of y’all’s boudoir list of activities. Here are 10 things that will, hopefully, help you to see the flames of wax play (I’ve got puns all over the place today) in a whole new light.
1. Anticipation Does Wonders for Sexual Arousal
GiphyI once read an article by a mental health expert who said that anticipation is probably the greatest aphrodisiac of all. It builds excitement. It fuels curiosity. At the end of the day, it’s like a mental form of edging because you’re getting close to something that you look forward to — although you’re not quite there yet. Listen, he’s not off base because even science says that anticipation can give you a dopamine hit that can ultimately improve your sexual experiences.
Keeping this point in mind, how can watching hot wax drip from a candle and head toward your body not fuel some level of anticipation? Especially if it’s your first few times trying it? A woman by the name of Ana Monnar once said, “Anticipation is sometimes more exciting than actual events.” Just something to consider, when it comes to entertaining bringing wax play into your world, my dear.
2. Wax Play Is Peak-Level Foreplay
GiphyWe all know what foreplay is, right? Just to be sure that we’re all on the same page, a very basic definition is it’s something that typically happens right before sex in order to arouse the people who are about to have it. And since foreplay is pretty much the prelude to copulation, it’s important that “the appetizer” is damn near as good as the “main course.” Wax play can help to ensure that because, aside from what I just said about anticipation, it can also help you and your partner tap into your more sensual and seductive sides. It’s hot. It requires being mindful. And since so much give and take is involved, it requires both people to be very into the moment. Lawd. Wax play is sexy to even just think about!
3. Temperature Pleasure Is Lots of Fun
GiphyOkay, say that you’ve never played with wax (in this way) before. Have you ever incorporated ice cubes? I ain’t gonna let y’all get ALL up in my business, so…let me just say (for now) that some ice during oral sex ain’t neva hurt nobody…quite the contrary! There’s something about the unexpected cool that mixes around with the warmth of a mouth that is truly unmatched. Along these same lines, wax play brings in the heat and, what makes temperature pleasure/play so awesome is, that it uses the sensations of different temperatures to bring out different forms of stimulation.
Another thing that’s worth noting about temperature pleasure is if you’re someone who considers yourself to be on the sexually conservative side yet you do like this type of activity, whether you realize it or not, you’re low-key participating in a form of kink (yep!). This brings me to my next point.
4. Wax Play Is an Introduction to Kink
GiphyIt’s kind of interesting how some people clam up at the thought of a (sexual) kink when the reality is, at the end of the day, it’s about having a certain type of sexual experience (as opposed to a fetish that focuses on objects or body parts; like a foot fetish, for example). So, if it’s that simple, why does it intimidate a lot of folks? Well, kinks tend to delve into people’s fantasies or unconventional ways of thinking (like BDSM or voyeurism).
At the same time, the cool thing about kinks is you control how deep you want to go. Just know that if you do participate in wax play, there’s no point in turning up your nose to the whole kink thing; wax play technically qualifies.
5. Soy Does One Thing. Paraffin Does Another.
GiphyOkay, so let’s spend a couple of moments talking about the things that you need to get the most out of your wax play experience. First, please don’t be out here imitating movies. While they will have you believing that you should pull a taper candle from your dining room table and go ham with it, it’s best to go with massage candles; they are specifically designed for wax play and body massages (The Knot has a recommendation list here and Women’s Health has a list of their own here).
When it comes to candles, in general, I’m always a fan of soy because they burn cleaner and last longer. However, when it comes to wax play, two other reasons why soy is best is it’s natural and “burns lower;” this simply means that once the wax hits your body, it won’t be as hot as, say, paraffin wax will (because it has a higher burning point).
What all of this means is if you want a more comfortable experience, go with a soy (or even a shea butter or beeswax) candle. If you want to play with the big (wax play) kids, try paraffin.
Oh, and if you’re wondering if you can never use “regular” candles — I mean, it’s your body. All I’m saying is some candles are designed for wax play; birthday candles? They are not. Feel me?
6. Massage Candles Feel Incredible on Your Muscles and Joints
GiphySo, here’s the thing about massage candles: If you’ve ever had a professional massage before, your massage therapist may have used them. And if you’ve gotten a high-end mani/pedi, some paraffin wax may have come into play (no pun intended). That’s because the wax from both types of candles has health benefits that include relaxing muscles, improving joint mobility, and increasing blood flow throughout the body. And when you factor in the fact that the better you physically feel before sex, the better sex will be during it — isn’t that just one more plus for and perk of wax play? I definitely think so.
7. The Aromatherapy Is Incomparable
GiphySomething else that’s awesome about most massage candles is they have a wonderfully alluring scent to them, by design. Yes, that matters too because there is plenty of data out here to support the fact that aromatherapy does everything from reduce stress and relieve bodily discomfort to treat headaches and fight off infections (word on the street is that it may even help with menstrual cramps and menopause).
As far as your sex life goes, aromatherapy is supreme because certain essential oils double up as aphrodisiacs. Lavender, neroli, and rose are proven to improve your sexual function. Geranium reduces anxiety. And listen, if climaxing is your ultimate goal, check out “Ultimate Climax Hack? 10 Scents That Make It So Much Easier To Orgasm” and then look for massage oils that smell like, say, vanilla, saffron or jasmine. Bottom line, a good massage candle that smells amazing is going to be worth every cent that you spent to purchase it.
8. You Will Learn Communication (and Dirty Talk) on a Whole ‘Nother Level
GiphyOne of the reasons why I once penned, “Are You Ready To Apply Your Love Language To Your Sex Life?” for the platform is because, if there’s one thing that I think is so awesome about sex, is it finds a way to incorporate all five of your senses (sight, touch, taste, sound and hearing) as well as your top love languages (words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch and gifts — if you’re open to it).
And when it comes to hearing (and words of affirmation), this is another area where wax play can be a winner because, as you’re learning what works for your partner and they learn what works for you, words have to be exchanged… perhaps even dirty ones.
And why is dirty talk so damn effective? According to scientific research, it has the ability to activate your entire brain (the biggest sex organ that you have) and when this is going on while you’re being physically stimulated — chile, the sky truly is the limit!
9. Wax Play Is Completely Customizable
GiphyYou know back when I was talking about soy candles vs. paraffin ones? Something that I didn’t mention, by design at the time, is that, although I will forever be Team Massage Candles when it comes to this particular topic, there are some known as wax play candles too. What’s the difference? Wax play candles tend to remain pretty hard (after being lit up) while massage candles are designed to melt into a liquid that you can massage on your partner’s body.
Why am I bringing this all up now? Well, it’s to serve as a reminder that wax play can be “dialed up” or “turned down” based on what you want to do. If you just want to put a twist on a massage, you can do that. If you’d like to test your partner’s tolerance level by applying more heat for longer, do that.
Just make sure that you use the kind of wax that doesn’t fully melt on shaved areas of the body (pretty sure why is self-explanatory), that you moisturize your skin beforehand (it’s easier to remove the wax…or whatever is leftover) that way and that you pour around 15-20 inches away from your partner’s body; that gives it time to cool somewhat on the way down. Oh, and if you don’t want to jack up your sheets, you might want to lay down a protective drop cloth (like this one here).
10. It Sure As Hell Ain’t Boring
Season 1 Friends GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphyLast point — and it brings all of this full circle. Now that you’ve read all of the ways that wax play can benefit your sex life, how in the world could you associate it with “boring” on any level? Anything that can get you hype, cultivate eagerness, and enhance what you’ve already got going on…that is worth putting on your sex bucket list and trying at least one time, wouldn’t you say? And why can’t that time be…TONIGHT? Shoot your man a pick of a massage candle with a heart and watch him beat you home.
Then report back (with edits…LOL).
Something tells me that you’ll become a wax play fan — SOON.
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Featured image by arsenisspyros/Getty Images
