

Who Knew? 15 Foods You've Been Eating (Or Preparing) The "Wrong" Way.
Someone once told me that they use dental floss to cut their desserts. Y'all. When I heard that—and the person proved to me that doing it does indeed work—that inspired me to look up some other underrated approaches to food because, again, if folks are out here slicing up cake with floss, what else am I missing? What could I be sharing with others who enjoy food—whether it's eating it and/or preparing it—too?
So, let's do this. Here are 15 things that have revealed to me that I've either been consuming food or cooking it, not necessarily the wrong way but a way that is far less beneficial than what is listed below.
1. Kiwi
Aside from those semi-annoying tiny seeds in kiwi, I really like this particular fruit. Good thing too because it's high in vitamins C, E and K, fiber and antioxidants. In fact, what a lot of people don't know is kiwi not only supports digestion and boosts immunity but because of the high amount of Vitamin C that's in it, kiwi has the reputation for relieving asthma-related symptoms too. Anyway, while I won't be getting into all of the health benefits of every food mentioned in this article, I thought it was important to share this because the main way folks eat kiwi wrong. It's wrong because they remove the skin when it's actually the skin that contains the most nutrients. So, the next time you decide to have some kiwi, remember to keep the skin on. It's better for you that way.
2. Carrots
Most of us grew up hearing that carrots were good for our eyes. There is a lot of truth to that, thanks to all of the Vitamin A that's in them. Carrots also contain fiber, biotin, potassium, beta-carotene, Vitamin B6 and even some protein. All of this helps to lower your cholesterol levels, reduce your cancer risk and keep you regular.
If you happen to be like me and you prefer to snack on baby carrots, you might want to consider cooking them more often. The reason why is because, when carrots are cooked, it actually raises the level of carotenoids that are in them. This is cool news because carotenoids help to protect your skin from sun damage as well as strengthen your bones, boost your immunity and even give you a little more brain power.
So yeah, that kinda debunks the myth that all vegetables are better when they're raw…doesn't it?
3. Strawberries
Strawberries are a low-calorie way to get in some fiber, Vitamin C, folate, manganese, potassium, several plant compounds and even a little bit of protein into your system. Eat them consistently enough and you'll be doing your part to help to regulate your blood sugar levels, protect your heart and reduce your cancer risks. Well, that is if you eat your strawberries whole. Although a lot of us like to slice this particular fruit up, the reality is that strawberries are extremely sensitive to light and oxygen. So, when both hit them, they lose their potency rather quickly. That's why it's far better to just rinse them off and eat them as is. No knife needed.
4. Grilled Fish
Do you like the taste of grilled fish but hate the clean-up process that follows making it? Something that you can do to keep your fish from sticking to your grill while also giving it an amazing citrusy taste is to place your fish on a bed of sliced lemons and limes. It will make for a delightful tasting, softer fish that won't get all into your grates. (This one tripped me out a lot, actually.)
5. Yogurt
This point was definitely an ah-ha moment for me. Have you ever opened up a container of yogurt, seen that watery stuff in it and immediately poured it out? Yeah, try not to do that. Believe it or not, what you're looking at is whey protein which is an excellent source of protein (especially if you're a vegetarian or vegan).
As you may already know, protein helps to build muscle mass, keep your hair and nails nice and strong, lower your blood pressure, reduce bodily inflammation and can even help to treat type 2 diabetes. So, unless the yogurt you're about to eat has expired, mix the watery stuff in with it and eat it like you normally would. It will literally do your body good.
6. Cherries
Like cherries yet hate the pits of them? Here's a hack that can make eating them so much easier. Simply place a cherry "right side up" on an empty glass bottle (like a soda bottle). Then take a thin wooden chopstick and poke it through the top of the cherry. The pit will fall into the bottle and then you can enjoy your cherries with ease.
7. Black Tea
If you're a tea fan, I'm thinking that you've got some black tea somewhere in your collection. That's awesome because it's got a ton of antioxidants, it's good for your heart health, it helps to improve your gut health, lowers your blood pressure and can even reduce your chances of having a stroke. Just make sure that when you have a cup that you leave milk out of it. Interestingly enough, when you put milk into black tea, it can negatively alter the cardiovascular benefits that the tea can provide. That's because milk proteins literally make it more difficult for your system to absorb tea's vitamins and nutrients. Gee, just one more reason to consider going without dairy, huh?
8. Tomatoes
Tomatoes are the kind of fruit that's really good for you because it's a great source of vitamins C and K, fiber, potassium, protein, folate and lycopene (and antioxidants that fight heart disease, cancer and aging signs). It's also got 95 percent water in it which makes it the kind of food that helps to keep you hydrated from the inside out. Anyway, while most of us tend to eat tomatoes when they're raw, it's actually best if you consume them once they've been cooked. That's because the nutrients in them significantly increase if tomatoes are prepared at around 200 degrees (Fahrenheit).
9. Ice Cubes
Ever wonder why your ice cubes tend to look rather cloudy when you put them into your glasses? The workaround for that is to boil the water that you plan to put into your ice cubes.
That will help to get all of the impurities in the water out, so that your cubes will look crystal clear. How cool is that?
10. Eggs
I got rid of my own microwave several years ago. If you still have one, you're pressed for time in the morning, yet you would still like to have more than a cup of java on your way out of the door, DIY microwave omelet eggs taste pretty darn good. Just scramble a couple of eggs, add the other ingredients that you want and pour everything into a microwave-safe mug. Put it into the microwave on medium for 2-2 ½ minutes and you're good to go. Also, if you're looking for a way to keep your eggs perfectly round in your skillet (maybe for a sandwich or something), slice a couple of onions into some thick rings and place them into a hot pan that already has a bit of oil in it. Then crack your egg inside of the onion. Your egg will be round as the ring is. Perfect.
11. Avocados
I actually enjoy making my own guacamole. Problem is, the urge to eat some is pretty random and sometimes, when the craving hits, the avocados that I've bought aren't ripe enough yet. If you can totally relate, you can speed the process up by covering an avocado up in foil and placing it into your 200-degree oven for about an hour. Just make sure that you use it immediately because the "speed up process" does cause avocados to taste slightly different.
Come to think of it, another ripen hack is to pull off the stem of a fresh avocado. If after you do it, the avocado is still green, it's not ripe. If it's brown, it's over-ripened.
12. Garlic
One of the most potent natural medicines is garlic. Straight up. A part of the reason is thanks to the 33 different sulfur compounds that it contains. And while a lot of us already know that garlic is a wise thing to eat when we're feeling under the weather, many of us miss out on getting as much of its strength as we should because we're eating it all wrong. See, there's an enzyme in garlic known as allicin that actually gains its power by being exposed to the air. That's why, if you plan on cooking with garlic, it's best that you don't mince it and immediately put it into your pots and pains. Instead, crush or press the pods, let them sit for 10-15 minutes and then put them into your dishes. That way, you'll get more of the anti-inflammatory, anti-fungal, antiviral and antibacterial properties that garlic has to offer.
13. Bacon
Whether it's pork, turkey or my personal favorite beef bacon, here's a hack to keep in mind. If you'd prefer your bacon to appear nice 'n flat like it does in restaurants and on food blogs, opt for baking it instead of frying it. Simply lay your bacon on a baking sheet that's been covered with aluminum foil and set your oven to 350 degrees. In 15-20 minutes, you'll have crispy bacon. Plus, by going this route, you can bake a considerable amount of bacon at one time. Plus, it's healthier which is always a bonus.
14. Sushi
I know a lot of us like to look so extra when we're eating sushi (LOL). Here's the thing, though. Chopsticks are actually for classic sushi, not sushi rolls. Rolls we are supposed to eat with our hands. Know what else? Ginger and wasabi are never supposed to be combined with soy sauce. In fact, the actual purpose of ginger is to cleanse your palate. So, eat it first and then enjoy your sushi rolls. Again, with your fingers.
15. Cake
And now, the floss thing. Me? I like to bake. A lot, actually. The only thing that really gives me any anxiety about it is when it comes time to cut a cake (including a cheesecake). Sometimes the knife seems to do more harm than good. If you can totally relate, guess what hack will help you out? Dental floss. Yep, so long as it's unflavored (waxed is helpful, though) and you keep your hand steady the entire time, it can slice through your cake in a way that makes for a much cleaner cut. Hmph. Makes me wonder how many bakeries do this. I might call a couple of 'em up to see. Anyway, enjoy eating the "right" way, sis.
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
Exclusive: KJ Smith Talks Viral Wedding With Skyh Black: ‘We Did What We Wanted To Do’
Whether it was your group chat, social media feed, or your favorite media outlet covering the spectacle, I’m pretty sure you’ve come across the viral Black wedding between actress KJ Smith (Sistas, Raising Kanan) and actor Skyh Black (All the Queen’s Men, Sistas). From their grand entrance to Jay-Z, Kayne West, and Beyoncé’s song “Lift Off” to KJ’s standout dance routine and the endless celebrity appearances, it’s an addictive TikTok scroll you can’t help but delve into.
But what many people would be surprised to know is that the couple’s original wedding plan was nothing like what it grew to be. What started as her simply scrolling through posts to get ideas eventually transformed into what the internet knows now as #TheBlackExperience. In an exclusive conversation with xoNecole, KJ walked us through her planning process, the morning of her wedding, and what she thinks of the online response.
Some women have their whole wedding planned out, from the bridal gown and venue to the bridal party and playlist. However, KJ was not one of those people. “I didn’t foresee a wedding in my future,” she reveals. “I was just gonna be the boss chick, rich auntie. I didn’t force love in my life until recently. I never had an idea of what a dream wedding would look like, it was easier for me to elope.”
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
And to many people’s surprise, that was their original plan – until Skyh brought up a valid concern. He was raised by his grandmother and thought she should be at the wedding, and naturally, that led to KJ wanting her grandmother to be there as well – then her mom – and later her sister – and, you’ve gotta invite the besties too, right? From there, the guest list continued to blossom. Much like the updo and pop of color bold red lip, she wore on her special day, which was initially on her Pinterest board as a soft glam look with her hair hanging on her shoulders, KJ is okay with changing her plan if it brings her and her loved ones happiness.
So let’s get into the wedding, which took place in Malibu, CA. The first thing you should know about the celebrity couple is that they’re non-traditional. They know, and they don’t care. So, in true unconventional fashion, they shared the morning of the wedding together.
“I woke up with Skyh, we walked our dog, had black coffee, and said good morning to the people who stayed at the venue with us,” she says.
Now, it was time for hair and makeup. While she was getting glammed up, she had Black-owned McBride Sisters wine and champagne (which ties into The Black Experience theme) on deck with her mom and friends, had her besties help rework her vows, retried on every outfit (sis is very Type-A), took photos, and ended the early-celebration with prayer and meditation. It seems very non-Bridezilla, I said.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company,” she explains. “The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
Things moved quickly, and before she knew it, it was time to line up to walk down the aisle.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company. The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
KJ Smith and her bridal party
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
Since everything started with their grandmothers, the couple wanted to ensure they honored them and planned to keep an element of their wedding traditional. Although we’ve all seen the reception videos and photos online, you may have noticed visuals from the wedding itself are harder to find.
“We planned for it to be traditional, but we’re not like that, so we tried to create those moments. We jumped the broom and had a salt ceremony (where the bride and groom individually pour salt into a glass container, symbolizing their lives becoming one.) But honestly, still, nothing was traditional about it.”
She goes on to explain that her mom caught the holy ghost coming down the aisle, her glam team was on deck, and she became so nervous with excitement that she had an anxiety attack – something she struggled with for years, she explains tearfully. Her friends had to literally cheer her down the aisle because of how overwhelmed she felt until she eventually calmed down.
“Skyh was standing there with his hand on his heart; we have our own little language, and I could feel the support,” she shares.
It was surprising to hear all these emotional moments happened before the party we saw online. That is until she once again got into the backstory.
“As a Black woman actress, for so long, it was popular to be mysterious and secretive, but that’s not who I am or what I like. Plus, we both wanted to create an experience for everyone there. We are the people who always host family and friends,” she says. “Like for me, the first order of business was getting sandals for the women so they can dance all night long. We had oxtail, D'ussé, and a coffee and sativa lounge – which is part of Skyh and I’s lifestyle and routine. We wanted to bring them into our world.”
Skyh Black (L) and KJ Smith (R)
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
She went on to discuss the dance routine she did for her husband at the reception, which has taken over the internet. Apparently, that’s another thing that didn’t go according to plan. According to KJ, she had promised a performance at their joint bachelor/ bachelorette party, but her outfit got stolen from her car. So, Skyh ended up performing for her – complete with a strip tease. Still, she never forgot her promise to dance for him.
So, she hired her friend as a choreographer, learned the routine, made friends and family watch it endless times, and attended Beyoncé’s Renaissance show a few days before for a confidence boost. It ended up being a show to remember. But that wasn’t all the night offered. Lil Mo performed, and the guests received special goody bags featuring their favorite Black-owned products like journals, hair care, and more.
“We made sure everyone was taken care of all night. That kind of stuff makes us happy. I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives,” she says.
But naturally, the internet is going to internet, and while there were countless people praising the event and applauding the newlyweds, some thought it was too over the top. I was curious to know her thoughts on some of the criticism.
“It’s cool. We did what we wanted to do. I’ve decided to share my world with people. Just how I went on social media platforms and found inspiration, I want people to do the same,” she explains. “I don’t think it's fair to my supporters not to give that out. There’s so much I wanna share with brides, specifically Black brides. I love that people are adding it to their Pinterest boards."
"I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives."
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
“I’m happy with it because we did what we wanted to do. They can do what they wanna do. Don’t be cruel, though, because you will get blocked,” she said, laughing.
The more I spoke with her, the more her sense of freedom shined through. People are always going to have their opinions, but at the end of the day, it’s you who has to live your life, and it seems like the couple realizes that and embraces that power. She also stressed the importance of not living for others and the lessons life has taught her.
“I’ve been to countless weddings, and I’ve been in countless weddings. I’m a generally older bride. So when women in my demographic get married, and you and your husband are busy working people like us, you deserve to have the one you want to have,” she shares.
“This is what we wanted to do. Our loved ones love and support us. We did so much to honor them, but we also wanted to start our own tradition, legacy, and creation. I'm not going to be pulled back into ideas of the past when I’m trying to create a future with my partner. “
If you’d like to see more of the couple, you probably won’t have to wait long. Although no content is planned yet, she admits to being an oversharer. “Me being open and transparent about my experiences lets people know it’s okay to have flaws; it makes you human, and for many years, I didn’t believe that was okay. I had pressure to be perfect, and I’d crumble every time,” she explains to xoNecole.
Now, she owns her flaws and uses them as a superpower to connect with her community and feel and express her love.
“Some people give us [Skyh and KJ] a hard time because they say we just seem too perfect. I’m like, why is that a bad thing? I love the people I love. From my man to my mama, to my friends - unabashedly. We move through time and space how we want to move. If we did it another way, we’d let ourselves and our union down.”
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Feature image by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
Have you ever had one of those days (or weeks) when you just wanted to lay in bed, turn off your brain, turn on your favorite TV show, and do absolutely nothing? Besides the occasional run to the bathroom or to get up and replenish your snack rotation, your bed is the only place you want to be for hours on end. You might find yourself mindlessly scrolling between social media and then dozing off for a couple of hours, only to wake up and do it all again — but is there really any shame in that?
Our beds have a way of providing us with a sense of peace, protection, and rest away from the demands of our everyday life, and a new TikTok trend is highlighting the benefits of this counter-culture, yet pleasurable form of rest.
Bed rotting, a TikTok trend that has garnered over 204.1M views, is essentially taking long periods for hyper-focused rest and downtime. It’s the act of doing absolutely nothing at all except for being in your bed for an extended period of time, with limited mobility, productivity, or activity.
This “anti-productivity” take on self-care does have its benefits, as one sleep scientist, Vanessa Hill, claims in a TikTok video that as you “waste away underneath your blanket… nothingness is your best friend.”
@braincraft In defence of #inbedrotting because it’s perfect 🛌💙 #lifehack #bedrot #bedrotting #bed #bedroomtok #sleepscientist #fyp
Since resting has, for a long time, been associated with “laziness' and the guilt that comes with that, bed rotting now offers the tired and restless a reason to recharge and recoup without feeling guilty for it.
The need for passive activities like bed rotting also points to the perpetual burnout that many millennials and Gen Zers are experiencing from the demands of work, family, school, and sustaining their livelihood despite the stress that it collectively produces. With so much pressure to be productive, even while we’re resting, these moments of self-care can be the reset button you need to feel reinvigorated enough to take on life’s responsibilities.
But just like with every wellness trend, it’s important to ask yourself why you’re bed rotting.
@drjessigold I learned about folks #coping by being #inbedrotting …here are some thoughts #mentalhealth #burnout #sleep #stress
When we’re anxious or stressed out about the pressure of our everyday lives, we can turn to sleep as a means to avoid the problem in hopes that it will go away. Because of this, Jessi Gold, MD, MS, assistant professor of psychiatry at Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis, shares in one TikTok that the lines between healthy bed rotting and depression can be blurred. “Are you sleeping because you don’t want to be awake because of stress and anxiety, or the things you have to do, or are you sleeping because you actually need it,” she states in the video.
Because bed rotting and depressive episodes can present themselves in similar ways, like oversleeping and fatigue, it’s advised to monitor your bed rotting to ensure that it doesn’t extend beyond a day or two, as any longer can be a sign of depression, and to seek professional support.
While there is no “perfect” or “right” way to give your body and mind the TLC and self-care that it may need, there are ways to make your bed rotting more restorative beyond media intake and sleep — unless you enjoy that, of course.
For instance, while in bed, take some time to get cozy with a book that doesn’t focus on self-help or “shadow work.” Get lost in the pages of a dramatic romance or even a coloring book where you can use your mind without actually using it. Or maybe even turn on some lo-fi or ambient music to meditate in bed for 45 minutes to an hour, where you’re truly unplugging with breathwork. Or, if you simply want to be on TikTok for a few hours, put a timer on so that you have a stop and start time that allows you to scroll in moderation.
Again, there’s nothing wrong with bed rotting if that’s the kind of rest you’re in need of. As we undo the society’s programming that tells us that rest is a reward for how productive we’ve been, remember that rest isn’t something you have to earn; it’s something you do because your body needs and deserves it.
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