

When Grief Brought This Couple Together, They Knew It Was Love
In xoNecole's Our First Year series, we take an in-depth look at love and relationships between couples with an emphasis on what their first year of marriage was like.
When life hits you with unexpected news, like the loss of a loved one, it can be difficult to know how to move on. Grief is something we all experience and it is something that stays with us forever. But it is within grief that we try to find the joy in order to keep moving forward. That was the case for Briana Hampton, who is an entrepreneur/author based out of Atlanta, Georgia. After losing her mother to cancer in 2015, Briana navigated through her grief by trying her best with keeping herself busy in her career as a model.
One day, when Briana sent a Facebook message to her now-husband Robert Hampton, aka Latruth, about a possible career opportunity, she did not expect her life to take a turn for the better. Now after four years of marriage, both Briana and Robert are enjoying life to the fullest.
The couple was able to sit down with xoNecole and share more on how their initial connection has kept them married after all these years. For Briana and Robert, it was the ability to connect on an experience that is one of the hardest realities to have to endure. The way Briana and Robert could relate to each other would be how they took a chance on love. After months of talking, the couple knew immediately that they wanted to take things to the next level. While they met one another and bonded over the feeling of grief, they were each other's light to get out of a familiar dark tunnel. Here's what they had to share.
How They Met
Briana: "I reached out to him via Facebook. At the time, I was a model and I reached out to him for a promotion opportunity. He responded and asked me for my number and till this day, I still haven't gotten that promo (laughs). When he called me, I thought we were going to talk about how much the shoot was going to cost and stuff. But it led to asking questions to get to know more about me and after I realized what he was doing, I figured to just see where this was going to go. While we were talking, we got to the topic of my mom passing away recently. He shared that his mother passed away from cancer too. Instantly, that was a click for me."
Robert: "Yeah, that's the gist of how we met. When I saw her message and looked at her photos, I thought she was very beautiful. After she gave me her number, I contacted her and just went from there. I lost my mom when I was five years old. I don't think I ever met anyone else who lost their mom too. When she mentioned her mom recently passed, that was definitely something that made me take the wall down and open up to her more. We talked for hours into days without seeing each other face to face. So the chemistry between us was built."
"When she mentioned her mom recently passed, that was definitely something that made me take the wall down and open up to her more. We talked for hours into days without seeing each other face to face. So the chemistry between us was built."
The One
Briana: "When my mom passed away, I was going through it. So when I met him, I was grieving her and I felt all the signs of her were coming through him. Whether it was our conversation and just our similarities, I felt my mom sent me an angel. Even our moms were similar in many ways that I just said, 'I got it, I am listening.' I knew that this was the person for me. Since my children's father, I never took anyone seriously. So when we were able to bond with each other's children, that made me more certain about him. When I moved to Atlanta, I expressed that for the long-term, I want marriage. I knew he was the man I wanted to be with and the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was my biggest cheerleader and that was it for me. He wasn't someone that wanted to control me, but wanted what was best for me and the family. He wanted to be the man to lead us down the right path."
Robert: "For me, it's loyalty over love. You meet a lot of people and they say they love you, but the loyalty doesn't match. I could tell that she was different from other women when it came down to loyalty, so that was key for me. Also, like she said, allowing me to lead was big for me. I don't think I've experienced love like this. For somebody to love me the way she loved me, that was it for me. With both of our moms passing and being able to be there for each other, we supported each other when times were hard. She also enjoys me being around her. I really believe that being with her, it's like my oxygen. You feel you can't breathe without her."
Biggest Fears
Robert: "My biggest fear was being with a woman who didn't understand my career. I worked my whole life in the entertainment industry. So I wanted someone who understood what that meant for me and who supported me in my career. I know with entertaining, it is hard to trust entertainers. Being more communicative with one another and building that trust helped me let go of my fears."
Briana: "My biggest fear was being with someone that will end up failing me and my children. Mainly putting my trust into something and it doesn't succeed. How I was able to let go of that fear was me paying more attention to his actions and less go by his words. We may seem like we disagree with something, but his actions will tell me that he is listening and he cares. He makes me feel secure and that is what means the most to me."
"I knew he was the man I wanted to be with and the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was my biggest cheerleader and that was it for me. He wasn't someone that wanted to control me, but wanted what was best for me and the family. He wanted to be the man to lead us down the right path."
Baggage Claim
Briana: "One thing I will say is that my husband is very friendly. So there were some flirting issues in the beginning of our marriage. I don't have a problem with people being friendly. But it is the way you go about it that gives a woman the idea that she has a chance with you is what bothers me. When you engage with someone in that way, they are going to take advantage of that. It was hard for me to communicate that that kind of behavior hurt my feelings. Over time, I had to learn how to actively communicate my feelings to him. I also had to grow accustomed to how the entertainment world works. Since then, he has changed his approach when he engages with other women. I think it is much better than before. He has changed the flirting a lot since then, for me."
Robert: "I don't feel like Briana had any habits for her to break. I just felt like she needed to understand more how the entertainment business works. Coming into the marriage, I have a huge fanbase and it is mostly women. With that, I handle certain situations the way I handle it and sometimes my wife wasn't comfortable with that. But after some time, I was able to show her that this is mainly business and that I separate that from personal. I had to be more mindful on how my behavior affects her and be more considerate. Before marriage, I was a single guy and I never had anyone question anything that I do. It was definitely an adjustment for me because I felt in the back of my mind that I was always doing something wrong at first."
Love Lessons
Briana: "The most important lesson I've learned is how to listen better and be able to effectively communicate. It's important to listen to understand someone instead of listening just to respond. Let me tell you, I'm a Cancer, so if you try to hurt me, a Cancer will hurt you back! (Laughs) I was never taught how to effectively communicate my feelings, so it was a learned behavior to be in defense mode instead of speaking about how I really feel."
Robert: "For me, the biggest lesson is realizing that something that may seem small to me, may be major for the other person. I think that is in a lot of relationships. Going back to me being used to just doing what I want to do. When you are in a partnership, you can't do what you want to do anymore (laughs). So being able to understand each other's perspective on things and take a moment in the other person's shoes was helpful for me in this marriage."
"I make it a point to continue to date my husband within our marriage. Dating each other helps us learn more about each other as we grow over the years and elevate in different areas."
Best Advice
Briana: "I wasn't given any advice about marriage going into it. What I will say is that even though you are married to someone, it is important to keep the fire alive. I make it a point to continue to date my husband within our marriage. Dating each other helps us learn more about each other as we grow over the years and elevate in different areas."
Robert: "I didn't get any advice either. I had to learn a lot of things on my own. I do hate that I didn't get any advice, but I wish that someone that told me about how to handle conflict. You have to handle things differently after you make this commitment. Growing up, I didn't have a lot of people guiding me. But I always made the right decision when it came to doing the right thing. I think that speaks volumes about my character as a man."
For more of the Hamptons, follow them on Instagram @mrslatruth and @_latruth.
Featured image via The Hamptons
'K' is a multi-hyphenated free spirit from Chicago. She is a lover of stories and the people who tell them. As a writer, 9-5er, and Safe Space Curator, she values creating the life she wants and enjoying the journey along the way. You can follow her on Instagram @theletter__k_.
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
They say you can’t heal in the same place that made you sick. And I couldn’t.
The year was 2019, and I knew I had to go. My spirit was calling me to be alone and to go alone. It was required in that season. A few months prior, I had quit my job. And it was late 2017 when I had met trauma.
I was completely broken, and every part of me hurt. I was no longer the lighthearted Camille that everyone loved and knew me to be. I remember a family friend saying, “You’re not the same.” And I wasn’t. I no longer recognized the girl looking back at me in the mirror. I needed major healing.
It was 2018 when I found the courage to seek mental health therapy. At that point, I knew there was nothing more that my friends could do for me. I was all cried out, and the silence was killing me. At the time, I was diagnosed with clinical anxiety, depression, and PTSD. How?
How did I let trauma take complete control of my life? But I had to forgive myself for all the things I did not know.
At the time, my therapist introduced me to journaling as a coping mechanism. Words ultimately became my best friend. In many ways, I would like to think that writing saved me. I am in love with words, and I always have been. My writing was and still is my safe space. It unlocked opportunities I never imagined – like writing for xoNecole.
And with this gift, I can now tell you a story about my own trauma, healing, self-discovery, and the journey to learning how to celebrate myself.
Starting a Healing Journey
In early Spring 2019, I was told by a Reiki healer that I was going to embark on a journey. She told me it was going to be lonely, but I was never alone. The thing is I never once mentioned to this woman my travel plans. It was August 2019 when I planned my solo trip to Europe. It was going to be 38 days alone on a continent I knew absolutely nothing about. By the end of summer and a nine-hour flight later, I touched down in London.
I fell in love with every single thing. I fell in love with everything I could see – colors, cobblestone streets, spiral staircases, adorned windows, architecture, garden terraces, nature, and people. I fell in love with everything I could hear – accents, language, history, and music. I fell in love with everything I could taste – wines, foods, and desserts. I fell in love with everything I could feel – ocean breezes, white sands, and well-designed buildings. I fell in love with everything that fed my soul. People, stories, and connections. I fell in love with myself.
I traveled to England, Portugal, Spain, France, and Italy. And with every conversation and every connection I made – I found healing.
I always say women have the ability to heal others naturally. It was here in my travels that I started to pay attention to the concepts of purpose, connection, energy, alignment, and universal signs. I began to truly realize not only my strengths and universal gifts but also how to use them too. I started to step into my authentic self. I began to realize who Camille really was. A free spirit with a heart of gold.
Courtesy of Camille Ali
A New Season
By the time I had returned from Europe, it was late Fall 2019, and I was a completely different person.
I spent most of my time pouring into myself. Self-development and self-love became key. Everything that I previously settled for in family, friends, and relationships – I went and gave to myself. Read that again. I became completely in love with who I was becoming, and I still am. I had let go of tradition, conditional beliefs, people pleasing, and living my life to make my parents proud.
I had let go of being a “straight arrow,” and the idea of having it all figured out. I outgrew tradition and cultural norms. Sometimes, those things can be so blinding.
I began to shift. I adopted and altered the things that aligned with my purpose and values.
I became risk-tolerant instead of risk-averse.
I canceled my fears.
I welcomed uncertainty, knowing I would always land on my feet.
This newfound level of confidence came out of nowhere. It was no longer a question of if I can do this. The question became, how can I do this? I stayed open to possibilities and opportunities in whichever form they came to me. I became selective and intentional with my time and energy, too. I went from being a 9 to 5 government employee, then a corporate consultant, to a small business owner not once but twice by 2021.
If you ask me who I am now, I would say I am authentically a creative. I write from my heart, and I speak from my core. My voice is my power, and my words hold weight. By trade, I am a paralegal and a business consultant.
How Trauma Shows Up in the Body
Even though I was able to heal my heart, my mind, and my spirit, I wasn’t quite done healing. And I didn’t even know it. In the last seven years, I gained weight. This was a direct result of a broken heart, emotional trauma, mental health issues, stress, and poor lifestyle choices. I was a good 50 pounds overweight, too. I knew something was wrong with my body when it stopped responding to my dietary and lifestyle efforts.
I started to advocate for my health in the winter of 2022 to get clarity and answers. I sought the care of medical specialists, asked the right questions, requested second opinions, and tested and retested my blood. Not one doctor could properly diagnose me, either.
When Western medicine failed me, I chose holistic medicine. What I learned and what I understood was that my physical health issues were a straight-up trauma response. I cried. I was always conscious about my health, and now I’m sick with Hashimoto’s thyroiditis. Yes, PTSD triggers and is linked to autoimmune diseases.
I remember thinking, “I did this to myself, and I have to fix it.”
I spent the majority of 2023 detoxing with Chinese herbs, making every lifestyle change possible. My body was holding on to dead weight – it had to go for me to continue to become.
Courtesy of Camille Ali
Celebrating Myself
Summer 2023 couldn’t come any faster. I completed my holistic detox with sacrifice and ease. While everyone saw just a “body transformation,” for me, it was an emotional release.
I was no longer reminded of what transpired. I cried again.
There were so many days, months, and years that I thought I would never get me back. And I believed it. I mean, who wouldn’t? Medical experts adamantly told me that there was nothing wrong with me. All I wanted was to feel like myself again. I missed me so badly.
I looked for me everywhere. I couldn’t find her until I paused and did the inner work.
I wouldn’t change one thing about my healing journey. It all had to happen so I could be in this current moment. And this girl right here – I know exactly who she is. I know what she stands for through and through. And I’ll never stray from that.
I’ve grown so much, yet in some ways, I’m rediscovering who this girl is again. It’s so intoxicating.
Courtesy of Camille Ali
Returning to Europe
I have always wanted to go back to Europe. Europe is a magical place to be. It's the energy, the people, and the lifestyle for me. But the timing wasn’t right. It took the wedding of a close friend of mine to make my return happen. I returned to Europe in August 2023. This time to Greece.
At first, I didn’t realize the significance of the timing. But make no mistake, this was alignment, a full circle moment, and a testimony to myself. I started a healing journey in August 2019, and I returned as a completely different person this year.
Happy, whole, and healed. Resilient and confident.
I knew I was meant to share a pivotal moment in my friend’s life and celebrate myself. My word for 2023 was joy, and I wanted all of it. More importantly, I deserved it.
I fell in love with everything all over again. Everything that I can see, hear, smell, touch, and taste, that is. I created moments and memories. And I felt each moment and memory deeply in new places and with new faces. Greece owed me absolutely nothing. Europe will always and forever have a special place in my heart.
My five-year healing journey taught me to always choose myself. I am grateful because my entire journey brought me home to myself. And one thing about me is that when I am in the right environment — I thrive. Always.
The journey to self-discovery is worth the uncomfortable moments and ugly crying. It’s worth the undoing, redoing, and reprocessing to finally come to a place of happiness, peace, and being comfortable in your own skin.
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Featured image by AzmanJaka/Getty Images