

When it comes to social media, viewers only get to see the results of our creative success, but to be honest, the majority of us are just winging it. I can wholeheartedly attest to not having all of the answers when it comes to work, life, and balance. I'm just figuring this ish out and learning more about myself and what I can handle during the process.
For the past few years, I've been juggling working in the beauty industry full-time, modeling, roller-skating, writing, and designing jewelry. Trust and believe that there are not enough hours in the day to do all of the things that I would like to. I have learned the hard way the importance of not pushing myself to the limit and neglecting the efforts of self-sabotaging because things aren't going as planned.
Like most of us blossoming creatives, this is a one-woman show, so on the days that I am being too hard on myself I say, "You are not Beyonce, and you do not have her team. Do what you can to achieve your goals when you can."
Most mornings, I designate time to separate work goals, creative goals, and personal goals that have worked best for me. Also, writing my accomplishments daily and writing encouraging notes to myself helps give me the reassurance that my hard work and dedication are worth it. Realistically, balancing working a 9-to-5 and being a progressive can be very time-consuming and overwhelming at times. It can take years before our creative dreams become the reality that we envision for ourselves.
Every now and then it helps to be reminded that your creativity is worth pursuing. Keep it pushing sis with these 6 tips:
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1. Just go for it.
"Don't talk about it. Just do it." That is exactly what my best friend said after I shared one of my creative ideas with her on a train ride home. Ever find yourself sharing amazing ideas and forgetting to actually pursue them? Try your hardest to come up with ideas and then immediately create a plan to achieve them. Nothing in life is guaranteed, so now is the time to put your best foot forward. There will never be the "right" time to execute your creative ideas. My best advice for a blossoming creative is, that idea that you have just may not work but so what? At least you tried. I have made adjustments to my brand, tried things that worked, quit ventures that didn't suit me, etc. It all turned out for the greater good. I'm still a work in progress and making adjustments as I go.
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2. Don't rush your creative juices.
We live in a world where instant gratification is so necessary. It's easy to get caught up in rushing ideas and the execution of creative projects. Remember, greatness comes with time.
When I first started creating my blog, I realized the importance of patience in creativity. I noticed that whenever I took my time with acting on my creative ideas, I had better results. Balancing a 9-to-5 and working on your creativity can be tough, but over time I learned to not beat myself up about taking breaks.
Sometimes you aren't going to be motivated to work on your creativity after work and that's OK. Commend yourself for the small efforts you do make towards your creative goals.
Try out different schedules to make your creativity more convenient and give yourself feedback in the process. Something that has helped me tremendously is scheduling creative freedom days. I literally wake up and say to myself, "Today, I'm going to come home straight after work, write in my journal and have 'me time.'" For whatever creative projects you are working on, make sure you take the time to create your best work. Don't rush, and take care of yourself.
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3. Don't allow people to convince you to turn your creativity down.
Do you, and stay true to yourself. People will mislead you all the time, so you might as well do what you want. Get acquainted with being misunderstood. Way too often people will tell you that you are "over the top" and you do "too much". Let those people continue talking and carry on. Speaking your dreams into existence is just the beginning. Only you know what you want to do and how you want to do it. This is about you and your vision. No one else can see it but you.
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4. Network and surround yourself with other creatives.
As a creative person, you need to keep a creative set of friends. If you don't have at least one, then it's time to find one. This is very helpful when it comes to expanding those creative ideas you come up with on the daily. When I first moved to Brooklyn, something that really helped me expand my business was surrounding myself with other creatives that I admired. I have creatives in my corner who I read my articles to and who try on the jewelry I design. I can always count on them to give me good feedback. Surrounding yourself with like-minded people can be the push that you need. It's a great feeling to support other creative works and cheer each other on during the process.
5. Use social media to build your brand.
As a blossoming creative, it is essential to put your social media skills to good use in order to create your plan. You never know who's watching or who you might be inspiring through your platforms. Research yourself and figure out exactly what your social media accounts display about you. Allow your social media to show your most creative self.
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6. Do it for you.
No matter what, do what you want and do it for you. I make sure that if no one else likes my content or jewelry, I like it. I try to ensure that I actually value everything I create and that the sole purpose is not money-driven. Don't be afraid to say "no" to projects that don't necessarily spark your interest or those that appear to be detrimental to your vision or brand.
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Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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I Tried It: 3 Low-Maintenance Wigs That Will Elevate Your Look This Season
There's nothing like the feeling you get when your hair is done. It can instantly boost your confidence and put you in a great mood. I've never been a stranger to hair trends and I often experiment with the latest braided styles and colors.
But there are moments when I just don't feel like doing my hair. I'm natural and a lot of times I will braid or twist my hair up and cover it with a scarf or turban. However, when I crave a different look without the hassle of styling, I reach for a wig.
I've always had a love-hate relationship with wigs. Sometimes, I struggle to get them to lay flat and don't get me started with the bonding glue process. So when it comes to wearing wigs, I like to keep it nice and breezy around this b--- (word to Katt Williams), especially in the summertime.
That's why I jumped at the chance to try these three versatile wigs from Luvme Hair. Each one offers a unique look and is surprisingly low maintenance, which aligns perfectly with my philosophy that wearing wigs should make life easier. Let’s dive into the three styles below.
Headband Wig
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This was the first wig I tried on, and I instantly fell in love with it. So much so that it took me weeks to even consider trying the other two. I’m partial to colored hair, especially blonds, browns, and reds, so I was skeptical about the jet black hair. However, I think the color, combined with the curl pattern, worked surprisingly well for me.
One of the things I really liked about this wig was that I didn’t have to braid my hair down first. I could simply throw it over a low ponytail, which is the epitome of a low-maintenance style. The headband has combs inside and velcro on the ends, ensuring a secure fit.
Half Wig
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I had never worn a half wig before, so I faced some challenges. I cornrowed the bottom half of my hair where the wig would sit, but I believe this made it more difficult to use the combs. It might just be me though. I straightened the top part of my hair to blend it with the wig, which looked cute for about five minutes.
Firstly, I have a brown/blonde color mix on the ends of my hair, and the half wig is black. So, I had to hide some of the color (I didn’t have time to dye the wig). Secondly, straightening my hair myself is always a hassle because it never lasts long. Add to that the summer humidity, and you get a hot mess. Despite all this, I managed to get some cute pictures before things got out of control, and that’s all that matters, right?
Would I consider this a low-maintenance hair style? Yes and no. I think it’s unrealistic for me during the summer, especially since I enjoy summer activities. However, when the weather cools down, I’ll definitely rock it, dyed, of course.
Bob
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Now, this is the wig I was nervous about. I never had a bob and I didn't think I would like it. But once I put bobiana on, my mind instantly changed. I finally understood why the gworls rave about the bob so much. It was giving boss. It was giving grown woman. It was giving the bob means business. Iykyk. It was the ultimate statement.
I will say when I first put it on, one side of my wig just would not lay flat. It took some trial and error, but I finally managed to get it to look good. With the bob, I highly recommend braiding your hair down first as small as you can so it can lay as flat as possible. I really liked the ash blonde color, which is perfect for summer. The length also makes it a great low-maintenance style for the season, so you don't have to worry about the hair making your neck sweaty.
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