Quantcast
RELATED

According to Mrs. Savannah James, she would like to be addressed as “wife” — other monikers simply won’t do.

In a recent episode of the Everybody’s Crazy podcast, James and co-host April McDaniel received a call from a listener caught in a love triangle between a man she was dating while entertaining a “sneaky link.”


The hosts went on to advise the call-in guest to pursue singleness as she sorts out her needs, which led to a discussion what the meanings of "sneaky link" and a "side chick," a topic their producer eventually clarified for them.

“A sneaky link is somebody that you know you sneaking with,” their producer decoded. “But your side chick, the majority of the time, your main girl knows about the side chick.”

Agasted by the definition, McDaniel went on to share her stance on ambiguous relationship statuses. “I don't even want to be the main chick,” she stated.

“I need to be the wife these days. I don't want to be the ‘wifey.’ I don't want to be nothing. I want to be the wife.”

James went on to express her strong dislike for the term "wifey," sharing that she didn’t want to be called a wife until she officially became one by her now husband, NBA star, LeBron James. “When I tell you I hate, loathe ‘wifey’ with my whole entire soul,” said James. “I'm sorry, don't call me your wife and I'm not.”

“I had to politely tell my husband back in the day,” she explained. “He used to introduce me, ‘This is my wife.’ I had to pull him to the side like, ‘Excuse me, sir, don't introduce me as that, please. I am not your wife, and I deserve that title when the time is right.’”

She continued, “I don't want you to start to think that it's okay for you to say this and then, you know, means don’t have to go the next step.”

As we age and new terms become popularized, it’s common to not fully know what titles and terms work best for the relationship and dynamic one might navigate. In McDaniel’s case, finding the right titles to introduce the new men who come into her life can be tricky.

“But that has been interesting, recently, when introducing certain individuals, at my age,” she explains. “‘Boyfriend’ sounds crazy, ‘my man’… mhmm… ‘my partner’ sounds like I’m a lesbian.” Conquous to what the best intro would be at the “big, grown stage,” James offered “tiers.”

“I feel like it's tiers,” James said. “You have to start at the bottom and then come up.”

“One of these days we have to go live so we can ask people live like, what is the titles? Because I'm very intrigued by knowing what are the titles people go by and what feels ‘premium.’ Because I want the premium title,” McDaniel concluded.

While every relationship is different, placing the proper titles on who you're dating and where you see it going is key to formulating a bond that’s both secure and amicable. After all, it’s not what they call you, it’s what you answer to.

Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.

Featured image by Araya Doheny/Getty Images for Baby2Baby

 

RELATED

 
ALSO ON XONECOLE
Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns

Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.

It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.

Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.

At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.

KEEP READINGShow less
Fire Cider & 6 Other Things That Can Nip A Cold In The Bud

I seriously doubt that it will come as a shock to anyone reading this that the “official” cold (and flu) seasons are considered to be during the fall and wintertime. However, what kinda tripped me out is that there really are only a few months of the year when we aren’t susceptible to catching a cold: May-July. SMDH.

Know what else is wild about colds? They have five stages: incubation (1-2 days); symptom onset (1-2 days); peak symptoms (1-2 days); plateau (2-3 days), and recovery (3-5 days) — and that is why, sometimes, it can seem like it takes FOREVER to get over a cold. Also, SMDH.

KEEP READINGShow less
LATEST POSTS