
As much as I like cold weather (and I do, unapologetically so), I have learned that it's not the best for my hair. For one thing, did you know that warm temps are far better at holding in moisture than cold ones are? Another problem is freezing weather and wind can cause the cuticles of our hair to lift which can result in hair strand damage and/or hair not being able to hold conditioning products in for very long. Also, when it's cold, that can lead to more frizzing and dryness; especially because we tend to be indoors more often with our HVAC units set to warmer temps.
All of these reasons are why it's so important to be proactive when it comes to caring for your hair during the fall and winter seasons. So, if you're looking for a few ways to do just that right about now, I've got 10 tips that will safely carry your tresses right on past Valentine's Day — and then some.
1. Do Some Pre-Pooing
Even if you use a sulfate-free shampoo (and I hope that you do because other than clarifying your hair, sulfates can be extremely drying), when you're a Black woman, it's still a good idea to pre-poo your hair on every wash day. Since it can be difficult for the natural sebum from your hair follicles and scalp to run down the entire shaft of your strands (due to your super curly texture), that's why your hair tends to be drier than other ethnicities. Then, when you bring shampoo into that mix, that can dry your locks out even more. One way to head that off is by pre-pooing — applying an oil to your hair, before shampooing. This works well because it softens your hair, makes your conditioner more effective and it significantly reduces the detangling process, so that there's far less breakage (which is a great thing because wet hair is pretty fragile).
As far as the best oils to use, I like avocado a lot because it's got a great reputation for containing properties that detangle, deeply moisturize, and even heal dandruff. Still, pretty much any oil of your choice (argan, coconut, grapeseed, olive, almond, etc.) will work. Just split your hair up into four sections, generously apply the oil, let it sit for 20-30 minutes, and wash and rinse as usual. You will immediately notice a difference.
2. Give Your Hair Herb-Infused Hot Oil Treatments
Something that I've been doing this year that I enjoy so much is making my own herb-infused oils. If you check out the article, "12 Natural Ways To Get Your Skin To Glow All The Way Up This Summer" that I wrote for this platform, #5 breaks it down for you. For now, I'll just say that this kind of oil is bomb because you can customize the herbs and oil(s) that you want in order to pamper your skin or, in this case, your hair.
Anyway, remember how I said that cold air can cause cuticles to take quite a beating? One way to avoid this is treating your hair to a hot oil treatment because it helps to seal your cuticles. Not only that but the heat of the oil will stimulate blood flow to your hair follicles which will strengthen your hair over time. Plus, hot oil treatments are great at reducing split ends and alleviating dry scalp. Applying a hot oil treatment every other wash day is cool. For tips on how to do it properly, check out YouTuber's Mia Nicole's video here, Leilani Iman's video here, and tatenda's video here.
3. Apply a Leave-In Conditioner
Even though I am big on deep conditioning (especially over the past couple of years), something that I wish I had been doing for even longer than that is applying a leave-in conditioner. Because my hair soaks up moisture with the quickness (no matter what the season may be), applying a leave-in (usually on freshly washed hair and right before I blow it out) has helped my hair to retain moisture for days on end. As far as if you should apply it every day, honestly, I think it depends on if you go with a cream or a spray (a spray is usually much lighter). Also, it's important to keep in mind that "too much of a good thing" can result in a lot of build-up and residue on your hair. Personally, on wash day and maybe once a week is more than enough in my opinion. The bottom line here is to use some, especially during the cooler seasons of the year. For tips on choosing the right leave-in for your hair and its needs, check out Naturally Curly's "Top 20 Leave-in Conditioners."
4. Use a Cream-Based Thermal Heat Protectant
Listen, I would audibly scream it in your ear if I could — ANY TIME YOU APPLY HEAT TO YOUR HAIR, YOU NEED TO USE A THERMAL HEAT PROTECTANT FIRST! It adds and seals in moisture. It reduces frizz. It provides a layer of protection from the heat. Just make sure during this time of the year that, unless you have very fine hair, you go with a cream rather than a spray base. While I can't recall her name, shout-out to the sales associate at one of my local Sally's Beauty Supply stores who told me that cream gives better and longer-lasting coverage than a spray. She's exactly right. I can totally notice a difference between the two since switching over to creams.
5. (Temporarily) Ditch Serums
As with most things in life, hair serums come with pros and cons. On one hand, they help to control frizz, reduce detangling and create an unbelievable amount of shine. On the flip side, they can create a significant amount of build-up, can weigh your styles down and, because of the chemicals in them, cold weather can actually cause serums to make your hair feel really stiff. The solution? Well, just like it's best to go with a cream-based thermal heat protectant when it's cold outside, it's a good idea to style your hair altogether with something that is more of a cream-base so that your hair feels softer and is easier to manage. That said if you absolutely must go with a serum, use one that is oil-based instead of silicone-based. You will be able to avoid the "stiffness" easier that way.
6. Shower in Warm (Not Hot) Water
I'll agree with anyone who feels like nothing feels better than a long hot shower after coming in from the freezing cold. Here's the problem, though — because your hair is pretty porous, if hot water hits it, that can result in it dehydrating your scalp and stripping your strands of the natural oils that they need in order to thrive. So, if "hot you must", avoid shampooing in the shower. And wherever you wash your hair, go with warm for the washing and cool for the final rinse. Cool water is something else that is great when it comes to sealing your cuticles right on up.
7. Protect Your Ends
A lot of the Black women I know will actually put their hair into a protective style during the summertime either because they are traveling a lot or they simply don't want to be bothered with thinking about it. But you know what? Fall and winter are ideal for braids, twists, wigs, and weaves because they are so good at protecting your hair — especially your ends — from inclement weather. Speaking of your ends, because you won't be able to retain any inches (check out "Let's Gain An Inch A Month Of Hair Growth 'Til December, Shall We?", "This Is The Way To Properly Care For Your Hair While Rockin' A Wig" and "If Your Hair Keeps Breaking Off, You're Probably Doing This.") unless they are able to remain healthy and intact, definitely make sure that you seal them on every wash day. All this means is you plan to apply some extra oil to them (after conditioning your hair), so they won't get dry and brittle as quickly. For tips on how to properly seal your ends, check out Simply Julia Lauren's YT video (here) and ulovemeg's video (here).
8. Make Vitamin E Your Hair’s Best Friend
Something that will definitely support your hair's health on all fronts is Vitamin E. The potent antioxidants in it will help to moisturize your scalp and soothe it if it's irritated or itching. It's the kind of oil that is extremely hydrating. If you're looking for an oil that will help to restore hair loss, there are studies to support its ability to do that. Vitamin E can also give your hair a lot of shine.
For all of these reasons and more, it's a good idea to make sure your diet contains foods that are high in Vitamin E (like almonds, broccoli, spinach, sunflower seeds, butternut squash, avocado, and kiwi), that you use hair products that contain Vitamin E and that you massage your scalp with some 100 percent pure Vitamin E oil, once a week, too.
9. Drink Herbal Teas
A couple of years ago, I penned "These Foods Will Give Your Skin & Hair The Moisture They Crave" for xoNecole because, it's important to remember that, when it comes to keeping moisture in your hair, it needs to happen from the inside out, just as much as it does from the outside in. One of the things I mentioned on this list is herbal teas because 1) teas are a great way to hydrate your hair and scalp and 2) teas are very popular around this time of year. As far as the kind of herbal teas that are especially good for hair health, some of those include rosemary (it increases blood circulation to your scalp); lavender (it reduces dandruff and soothes an itchy scalp); ginger (it reduces hair fall); peppermint (it encourages hair growth) and red clover tea (it adds additional moisture).
10. Use a Humidifier at Night
I've been saying, on repeat, that since it appears that COVID isn't going anywhere, any time soon, it's really important to invest in a humidifier. You can read all about why by checking out "10 Really Good Reasons To Get Yourself A Humidifier This Fall." As it relates to your hair, specifically, sleeping with a humidifier at night is an effective way to restore the moisture that your HVAC unit may be zapping from your hair. Since I've been using one, it's kind of wild how my scalp has been itching less and my hair has been feeling less dry. It's one of the best hair (and skin) investments that I've made in a long time as I prepare for all that fall and winter have in store. If you don't have one, treat yourself. You — and your hair — won't regret it at all.
Featured image by Getty Images
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Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns
Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.
It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.
Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.
At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.

In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.

In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.

And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.

We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.

So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.

That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.

This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
Give Thanks: 10 Tips For Hosting An Absolutely Awesome Friendsgiving
If you’ve never checked out an episode of the ReLiving Single Podcast featuring Maxine and Synclaire — oops, I mean Erika Alexander and Kim Coles — it’s worth listening to an episode or two; especially if you’re someone like me who watches the Living Single reruns on TV One, sometimes, like they just came out. Good times.
And what does this even remotely have to do with Friendsgiving? Well, if you ever wondered what the origin story of this non-holiday-holiday is, legend has it that it’s mostly due to the combination of a 2007 tweet and the show that tries to act like it wasn’t birthed out of Living Single: Friends (I’m not the only one who feels this way either; you can read more about all of that here, here and here).
Apparently, there was a Thanksgiving episode that featured all of the friends having dinner together. And y’all, there was simply no way that I was going to mention the latter without shouting out the original (amen?).
Okay, so with that out of the way — Friendsgiving. Something that I appreciate about twists to holidays like this is that it’s a reminder that there is no one way to celebrate special occasions. And so, if, for whatever the reason, you will not or cannot be with family during the holiday season, there are certainly other alternatives at your disposal.
That being said, if the thought of spending time with friends this Thanksgiving is something that you’d like to do, yet you’re not sure how to host it in a way that will make Friendsgiving a fan favorite for your entire circle — I’ve got 10 suggestions that can make the planning process easy as pumpkin (or sweet potato) pie.
1. Position Chrysanthemums or Orchids for Your Table Décor

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Let’s start with décor first. Listen, aside from cleaning up your place, you don’t have to be over the top. If you put together a really nice centerpiece or put a flower at each table setting, honestly, you’re all good. And if you’re someone who is big on details and symbolism, my recommendation would be to go with some chrysanthemums and/or orchids.
When it comes to chrysanthemums, not only are they a peak fall flower, they represent things like friendship and happiness. And orchids? They tend to bloom during the fall and spring seasons and, not only are they about luxury, certain orchid colors also symbolize friendship (for the record, yellow roses symbolize friendship too). Perfect.
2. Incorporate Scents That Cultivate Gratitude
Speaking of cultivating a warm and inviting space, you can never go wrong with scented soy candles — or at least having an essential oil diffuser in a few spots. Some scents that actually help to bring in the spirit of gratitude include vanilla, jasmine, ginger, cedarwood and frankincense.
3. Use Upscale Paper Products to Dine With

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Let’s be real — a lot more of us would probably host events in our home if it wasn’t for the mess that is left behind in our kitchen once the festivities are over. Wanna avoid that? Use paper plates. No, I don’t mean the cheap Styrofoam ones. SMDH. These days, there are paper (and plastic) plate brands that will low-key blow your mind when it comes to how bougie they look. Some that are worth considering are located here, here and here.
4. Handwrite Thank-You Notes (Use Them As Place Settings)
If you’re like Tiffany (from the HBO series Insecure — what a time) was at that memorable dinner party when all hell broke loose between Lawrence and Issa and you’re pretty anal — I mean, particular — LOL — about place settings, it’s a nice touch to pick up some blank thank-you cards that you can write a personalized “I’m thankful for you because…” message in. Place each one where you’d like each friend to sit. They won’t see it coming and it’s a really nice touch.
5. Have Everyone Bring Their Favorite Homemade Dish

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Okay, and what if what has you on the fence about hosting is you don’t feel like doing a ton of cooking? Chile, this is where the concept of having a potluck comes in. Get everyone to bring the dish that they claim they cook the best and make sure to let them know how many individuals you plan on coming (so that they will make enough). You can even make a game out of it by having everyone anonymously vote for the first, second and third best dishes out of the bunch. Take it up a notch by having a prize for each winner.
6. Take a Warm Drink and Dessert Poll Beforehand
You know what isn’t discussed enough about dinner parties? Folks bringing desserts that other people don’t even like. SMDH. You can avoid this from becoming an issue at your Friendsgiving by sending an email (most people prefer that to group chats; let’s be real — and make sure to BCC everyone as well) asking everyone to share what their top three favorite desserts and warm drinks are. Then pick the top 2-3 out of the bunch. That way, you won’t have a ton of (for instance) coffee cake or apple cider lying around that no one even wanted in the first place.
7. Create a Signature Friendsgiving Mocktail and Cocktail

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Speaking of drinks, another way to make your Friendsgiving memorable is to come up with a signature mocktail (for those who don’t consume alcohol) and cocktail. For the mocktail, you can also poll your friends about their favorite mocktail or fruits and come up with a mixture of your own. For the cocktail — although National Friendship Day is actually in August, I did peep that there are certain drinks that have been created in its honor. Some of them are located here for you to do a bit of tweaking on (if you’d like).
8. Ask Everyone to Share Their “Favorite Friend Quality” of Another
You know how it’s customary for everyone to go around and share what they are truly thankful for before having dinner? Well, to continue along with the Friendsgiving theme, have each person share what their favorite friend quality is about the person to their right. If folks are just meeting each other for the first time, instead they can share what they value the most in friendship overall, along with a story of how it was displayed to them personally over the past 12 months.
9. Send Each of Your Guests Home with a Fresh Gratitude Journal

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Wanna send folks home with a nice parting gift? It would be so on-trend to give each of them a gratitude journal. Listen, we are in some crazy times right through here (at least in the States) and so, encouraging your friends to set some time aside, regularly, to think about and then outwardly express what they are grateful for? That helps to keep stress down, keep things in perspective and it reminds us all to maintain a positive mindset as much as possible.
10. Watch a Nostalgic Movie
While everyone is enjoying dessert and drinks, how about watching a movie that brings back fond memories? A list of some of the most popular movies to come out previous Thanksgiving weekends is located here and a list of some favorite Black holiday-themed films can be found here. It’s a way to wind down and share some laughs before everyone heads home.
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Friendsgiving. What a wonderful way to celebrate your friends while also observing Thanksgiving in a way that is totally on your terms. And now that you know how to put it together, what are you waiting for? Hit your friends up and let them know that, whether it’s on actual Thanksgiving Day or a few days before or after, you’ve got a special dinner in mind.
One that has a good time with amazing friends written ALL over it.
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