

‘It’s So Much Power In Letting Go’: Lauren London Shares Inspirational Message About Dealing With Trauma
The world has watched Lauren London grapple with the loss of her love and younger son’s father Nipsey Hussle, and as she mourns, fans have continued showing her support and light as she transitions back into acting. Since Nipsey’s death, Lauren has been mostly silent, speaking here and there in interviews. But most recently, the beloved actress went viral on Twitter after she opened up about trauma and control in a clip from the On Purpose with Jay Shetty podcast.
In the clip, she shared an inspirational message about how to deal with life when things don’t go as planned. “When you have this plan for your life as you should, if or when that gets derailed, and you have plan b now to go off that you didn’t plan on, it is the ultimate test of surrender,” she said. “Because at the end of the day, as much control as we think we have, we do not and it’s actually very powerful to surrender. We think that it’s a weakness, but it’s so much power in letting go and flowing with the river ‘cause life is gonna do what it’s gonna do and we are all gonna get chin-checked by life one way or another. So, I might as well focus on my enlightenment and roll with the river and not fight with the rocks.”
The ATL breakout star has slowly been making her return to the big screen after working alongside Michael B. Jordan in Without Remorse, Kevin Hart’s True Story, and she now will be starring in Kenya Barris’ Netflix film You People with Eddie Murphy and Nia Long. Elsewhere in the interview, she opened up about the time when she thought she would never return to Hollywood.
“What was stopping me was that life changed and so my perspective on life changed,” she said. “My field, the audition process, and the rejection and the politics of what came with what I do did not align with what I was seeking anymore. I didn’t want to have to politic, I didn’t want to have to do things that I felt weren’t in alignment with my truth and I just wanted to be myself fully.”
“If I could participate in a project wholly, I would do it. But if I could not, I didn’t want to be fake and not give of myself in a real way.”
The mother of two then revealed how Michael was the one that convinced her to give acting another shot with the Amazon Prime film Tom Clancy’s Without Remorse.
While she was still hesitant with taking on the project, she felt a connection to the character Pam after reading the script. Pam was married to Michael’s character John Clark and she was tragically killed in an attack against him.
“Michael was like ‘look just read the script’ and so I read the script and what drew me to it was that I can participate authentically. I can genuinely play this role because I really resonated with the fact that she passes and he has all these visions of her and that she’s still communicating with him just not physically, but spiritually and that’s exactly where I felt I was at the time.”
We’re glad to see Lauren doing well and getting back to her passion authentically.
Featured image by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images for The Recording Academy
Chief Mom Officer: 23 Quotes From Working Moms Finding Their Balance
The truth is, Black moms create magic every single day. Whether we're juggling motherhood with a busy 9-5, a thriving business, or staying at home to run a household, no day is short of amazing when you're managing life as a mommy. This Mother's Day, xoNecole is giving flowers to CMOs (Chief Mom Officers) in business who exemplify the strength it takes to balance work with motherhood.
We've commissioned these ladies, who are pillars in their respective industries, for tidbits of advice to get you through the best and worst days of mothering. Here, they share their "secret sauce" and advice for other moms trying to find their rhythm.
Emmelie De La Cruz, Chief Strategist at One Day CMO
"My mom friends and I all laugh and agree: Motherhood is the ghettoest thing you will ever do. It's beautiful and hard all at the same time, but one day you will wake up and feel like 'I got this' and you will get the hang of it. After 4 months, I finally felt like I found my footing to keep my kid and myself alive, but it took vulnerability to take off the cape and be honest about the areas that I didn't have it all together. The healing (physically and emotionally) truly does happen in community - whatever and whoever that looks like for you."
Alizè V. Garcia, Director Of Social & Community Impact at Nike
"I would tell a new mom or a prospective mother that they must give themselves grace, understand and remember there is no right way to do this thing and have fun! When I had my daughter three and a half years ago, I was petrified! I truly had no clue about what to do and how I was going to do it. But with time, my confidence grew and I realized quickly that I have all the tools I need to be the mother I want to be."
Nikki Osei-Barrett, Publicist + Co-Founder of The Momference
"There's no balance. I'm dropping sh*t everywhere! However, my secret sauce is pursuing interests and hobbies outside of what's required of me and finding time to workout. Stronger body equals = stronger mind."
Lauren Grove, Chief Experience Architect, The Grant Access, LLC
"I try to give myself grace. That’s my mantra for this phase of motherhood…grace. I won’t be able to get everything done. To have a spotless house. To not lose my cool after an exhausting day. Those things can’t happen all of the time. But I can take a deep breath and know tomorrow is another day and my blessings are more plentiful than my pitfalls."
Rachel Nicks, Founder & CEO of Birth Queen
"You have the answers within you. Don’t compare yourself to others. Curate your life to work for you. Ask for help."
Tanisha Colon-Bibb, Founder + CEO Rebelle Agency + Rebelle Management
"I know love doesn't pay bills but when I am overwhelmed with work or client demands I take a moment to play with my baby and be reminded of the love, energy, science, and Godliness that went into his birth. I am brightened by his smile and laugh. I remember I am someone's parent and not just a work horse. That at the end of the day everything will work out for the good of my sanity and the love within my life."
Christina Brown, Founder of LoveBrownSugar & BabyBrownSugar
"Learning your rhythm as a mom takes time and can be uncomfortable when you’re in a season of overwhelm. Constantly check in with yourself and assess what’s working and what’s not. Get the help you need without feeling guilty or ashamed of needing it."
Mecca Tartt, Executive Director of Startup Runway Foundation
"I want to be the best for myself, my husband, children and company. However, the reality is you can have it all but not at the same time. My secret sauce is outsourcing and realizing that it’s okay to have help in order for me to perform at the highest level."
Jen Hayes Lee, Head Of Marketing at The Bump (The Knot Worldwide)
"My secret sauce is being direct and honest with everyone around me about what I need to be successful in all of my various "jobs". Setting boundaries is one thing, but if you're the only one who knows they exist, your partners at home and on the job can't help you maintain them. I also talk to my kids like adults and let them know why mommy needs to go to this conference or get this massage...they need to build an appreciation for my needs too!"
Whitney Gayle-Benta, Chief Music Officer JKBX
"What helps me push through each day is the motivation to continue by thinking about my son. All my efforts, though exhausting, are to create a wonderful life for him."
Ezinne Okoro, Global Chief Inclusion, Equity, & Diversity Officer at Wunderman Thompson,
"The advice I received that I’ll pass on is, you will continue to figure it out and find your rhythm as your child grows into new stages. Trust your nurturing intuition, parent on your terms, and listen to your child."
Jovian Zayne, CEO of The OnPurpose Movement
"I live by the personal mantra: 'You can’t be your best self by yourself.' My life feels more balanced when I offer the help I can give and ask for the help I need. This might mean outsourcing housecleaning for my home, or hiring additional project management support for my business."
Simona Noce Wright, Co-Founder of District Motherhued and The Momference
"Each season of motherhood (depending on age, grade, workload) requires a different rhythm. With that said, be open to learning, to change, and understand that what worked for one season may not work the other...and that's okay."
Janaye Ingram, Director of Community Partner Programs and Engagement at Airbnb
"My daughter's smile and sweet spirit help me to feel gratitude when I'm overwhelmed. I want her to see a woman who doesn't quit when things get hard."
Codie Elaine Oliver, CEO & Founder of Black Love
"I try to listen to my body and simply take a break. With 3 kids and a business with 10+ team members, I often feel overwhelmed. I remind myself that I deserve grace for everything I'm juggling, I take a walk or have a snack or even head home to see my kids, and then I get back to whatever I need to get done."
Jewel Burks Solomon, Managing Partner at Collab Capital
"Get comfortable with the word ‘no’. Be very clear about your non-negotiables and communicate them to those around you."
Julee Wilson, Executive Director at BeautyUnited and Beauty Editor-at-Large at Cosmopolitan
"Understand you can’t do it alone — and that’s ok. Relinquish the need to control everything. Create a village and lean on them."
Salwa Benyaich, Director Of Pricing and Planning at Premion
"Most days I really try to shut my computer off by 6 pm; there are always exceptions of course when it comes to big deals or larger projects but having this as a baseline allows me to be much more present with my kids. I love the fact that I can either help with homework or be the designated driver to at least one afterschool activity. Work can be draining but there is nothing more emotionally draining than when you feel as though you are missing out on moments with your kids."
Brooke Ellis, Head of Global Marketing & Product Launches at Amazon Music
My calendar, prayer, pilates class at Forma, a good playlist, and oatmilk lattes all help get me through any day.
Courtney Beauzile, Global Director of Client and Business Development at Shearman & Sterling
My husband is a partner who steps in when I just can’t. My mom and my MIL come through whenever and however I need. My kids have many uncles and aunts and they will lend an ear, go over homework, teach life lessons, be a presence or a prayer warrior depending on the day.
Robin Snipes, Chief of Staff at Meta
"Enjoy the time you have to yourself because once kids come those times will be few and far between."
Monique Bivens, CEO & Founder at Brazilian Babes LLC.
"For new moms, it is very important that you get back into a habit or routine of something you use to do before you were pregnant. Consider the actives and things that give you the most joy and make the time to do them."
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Westend61/Getty Images
- 20 Inspirational Quotes That'll Motivate TF Out Of You ›
- Tracee Ellis Ross Breaks Down What ‘Wander, Ponder, And Be’ Means To Her ›
- 20 Quotes About Black Love That Will Make You A True Love Believer ›
- 14 Quotes From Black Feminists To Inspire You To Boss Up ›
- 10 Inspirational Issa Rae Quotes For When You Need Them Most ›
I'm sure by now you've seen a crazy number of people pop up across your "For You" page or in a random YouTube ad doing ice baths, also known as cold plunges. You may be wondering why these people are intentionally sitting in a tub of water between 39 to 50 degrees. I know that's what you're thinking because for the past few years, every time I post about doing an ice bath, my comments and DMs get filled with questions.
Since April 12, 2023, I've been doing daily cold therapy at home in my plunge tub, and I want to share the personal benefits I've seen it have on my life as well as the science behind the process. If doing cold therapy is a goal of yours, keep reading for tips and resources for you to start your cold therapy journey.
Courtesy of Christa Janine
The Physical Benefits of Ice Baths
I originally started doing ice baths in 2018 to reduce muscle soreness after an intense workout, but now I use them as a method to reduce inflammation in my knees and perform at a higher level during workouts. I recently had a double meniscus repair on my right knee, and daily ice baths have helped with my recovery process as well.
Since beginning cold therapy daily, I've seen an increase in my energy levels and improvement in my sleep patterns. Even though my workload has remained the same or slightly increased at times, I've been able to maintain my level of energy throughout the day without feeling completely depleted by the end of the night. Likewise, I used to have intense insomnia, but now I'm averaging 7-8 hours of sleep each night.
In addition to the direct benefits I've experienced in my physical health, science has shown that cold therapy can also boost your immune system, increase blood flow, reduce chronic pain, and boost your metabolism.
The Mental Benefits of Ice Baths
Since incorporating daily ice baths into my daily routine, I've noticed that when I get overwhelmed and feel stressed, I'm able to better manage my anxiety and control my nervous system. One method that is taught to novice ice bathers is utilizing your breath as you enter the cold water. This teaches you how to calm down your fight, flight or freeze response.
By understanding how to use my breath in stressful situations and practicing this usage daily, I'm able to implement this same practice when I feel anxiety or panic attacks coming on in my everyday life. Let's be clear: I still have anxiety, but I’m able to breathe through those moments and quickly move past them.
Courtesy of Christa Janine
In addition, another benefit I've found is mental clarity and awareness. This is one of the top benefits I receive from ice baths. Learning how to direct my thoughts and focus with my breath, I find clarity even in stressful moments. Though I’ve been bombarded with a variety of tasks and obstacles daily, I’ve been able to navigate through with a clear mind. This also allows me to articulate my thoughts and emotions more clearly because I’m more aware of what I’m experiencing in real time.
Lastly, daily cold therapy teaches you discipline and commitment to yourself and your goals. It allows you to focus on one thing at a time and teaches you how to be present in the moment. It's also a daily reminder that you can do hard and uncomfortable things even when they seem impossible.
Resources
If you're interested in learning more about starting your own ice bath practice I'd suggest looking into these resources and following these experienced cold therapists.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image courtesy of Christa Janine