

Here’s How High-Profile Wardrobe Stylist Germanee Gerald Finds Balance In Her Life
In xoNecole's Finding Balance, we profile boss women making boss moves in the world and in their respective industries. We talk to them about their business, their life, and most of all, what they do to find balance in their busy lives.
If you haven't heard of Germanee Gerald, well, thank us later. Her Instagram alone may give you all the feels, but you can easily walk away with a new sense of fashion inspiration simply by seeing how she does WHAT she does.
Gerald is not only a wardrobe stylist responsible for dressing down many of Silicon Valley's C-suite and industry professionals, but she's also had a long career working in merchandising, retail management, and now, entrepreneurship. In 2015, she started GG+CO Styling Firm, where her entrepreneurial pursuits led her to create a customer-centric focus on fashion, and more importantly, style. Not to mention she also hosted her own events that bring together both men and women to learn all about dressing the part and feeling their best while doing so.
Germanee Gerald
Just because she's dealing with clothes and celebrity clientele doesn't mean that everything is easy for the Charlotte, North Carolina native. In fact, her days, weeks, and even hours are meshed with a lot of preparation, time management, and of course, big personalities.
For our latest installment of Finding Balance, we wanted to know how Germanee balances dressing some of today's hottest executives while keeping a bit of fly for herself:
What is an average day or week like for you?
My work week varies as GG+Co Styling Firm is a three-pronged business. My work as a stylist requires me to interact with clients at fittings in-person and virtually, and I also woo potential clients with pitch decks. I pivot from styling to planning with my team for our semi-annual 'Sip N' Style events, where we educate individuals on how to hone in on their personal style over cocktails all while supporting local retailers. When I've washed my hands from client and event work, I'm using the rest of my time to work my style course that I will be launching in January where I'll be teaching individuals how to curate their signature style.
What do you find to be the most hectic part of your week? How do you push through?
I don't think I can pinpoint one singular thing that makes my week hectic. However, I often find it challenging to juggle and balance my schedule from time to time with my hands being in so many things.
Germanee Gerald
How do you practice self-care? What is your self-care routine?
I practice self-care by giving myself space to pause, meditate, and collect my thoughts at the beginning of each week. Each Monday, I reset, catch up on Sunday's sermons (since I'm usually working on the weekends), meal prep, try to write out my to-do list so I know what's ahead of me, and treat myself to a mask.
How do you find balance with:
Friends?
It's hard, but my friends are important to me and I make an effort to show them that. For me, it's all about calendaring. I often schedule calls, FaceTime dates, or time to hang with them in person. I also make it a point to try to clear out my unread text messages I may have missed from them before I go to sleep at night.
Germanee Gerald
Love/Relationships?
At this point in life, I'm focusing on self-love. I'm making a point to be intentional about becoming the best version of myself before I allow space for someone else in my life.
Dating?
While I'm focusing on myself, I do try to go out on dates from time to time when I'm equally intrigued by a guy. These are also scheduled out in advance, so it's important to me that I spend time with a guy who can understand and be sensitive to my schedule.
Exercise?
Exercising and having it in my routine is important to me. I appreciate it not only for the physical benefits, but it also helps me to set my intention for the day and release stress. I try to workout at least four times a week in the mornings. My workouts range from three-mile runs to cardio and weightlifting.
Do you cook or find yourself eating out?
I typically cook my meals six out of the seven days of the week, and sometimes I even cook my cheat meals. For me, it helps cut down on spending, which is important as an entrepreneur. In addition, it allows me to have full visibility of what's going in my meals. However, I do try to treat myself to a meal out once a week.
Do you ever detox?
I've always found it difficult to detox and disconnect. Taking breaks makes me feel like I'm perpetuating listlessness and impeding my goals, so it's seldom that I detox from work. However, I've found it very beneficial to detox from social media; I compare myself less to other people's personal relationships, careers, physical appearances.
Germanee Gerald
"I've found it very beneficial to detox from social media; I compare myself less to other people's personal relationships, careers, physical appearances."
When you are going through a bout of uncertainty, or feeling stuck, how do you handle it?
I usually lean on faith and friends when doubt arises. I pray, read scriptures, and ask for clarity. Talking to friends helps me get out of my own head and gives me a different perspective — they assure me that I'm on the right path, that I'm capable, and if I'm stuck they usually help me strategize and tease out my ideas. I also have to self-promote at times. Talking to myself in the mirror and speaking positive affirmations to tell myself I'm capable also helps.
What does success mean to you?
The concept of success, to me, means accomplishing a goal that I set and holding myself accountable to complete it. When I was in college, I promised my parents that changing my major from biochemistry to fashion would pay off, and upon graduating I landed a position at Gap, Inc. in the company's highly regarded Rotational Management Program — which promised a role at the company working at one of its subsidiaries upon graduating the program.
I said that I would work for myself, and now, I am. I created a plan, saved for two years, and on the day of my ten year anniversary at Gap, Inc., I was able to call myself a full-time entrepreneur. I created the Sip N' Style events to educate individuals on style, how to find it, and what works best for them. Now I do that, and the event has grown from five people in my living room to hosting 250 people at event spaces in the Bay Area. Finally, last year I created a vision board with ten of my 'ideal' clients, and I've had the pleasure of working with half of them. There's still work to be done there, but I know I'll secure the bag, as I've done with the other things I've set out to do.
Germanee Gerald
"I said that I would work for myself, and now, I am. I created a plan, saved for two years, and on the day of my ten year anniversary at Gap Inc., I was able to call myself a full-time entrepreneur."
What is something you think others forget when it comes to finding balance?
I think people forget the importance of it (myself included). It's imperative to have a healthy balance to show up and be your best self mentally, physically, and emotionally.
To keep up with Germanee, follow her on Instagram @germanee_g and visit her website GGandcostyling.com!
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How Content Creators Hey Fran Hey And Shameless Maya Embraced The Pivot
This article is in partnership with Meta Elevate.
If you’ve been on the internet at all within the past decade, chances are the names Hey Fran Hey and Shameless Maya (aka Maya Washington) have come across your screen. These content creators have touched every platform on the web, spreading joy to help women everywhere live their best lives. From Fran’s healing natural remedies to Maya’s words of wisdom, both of these content creators have built a loyal following by sharing honest, useful, and vulnerable content. But in search of a life that lends to more creativity, freedom, and space, these digital mavens have moved from their bustling big cities (New York City and Los Angeles respectively) to more remote locations, taking their popular digital brands with them.
Content Creators Hey Fran Hey and Maya Washington Talk "Embracing The Pivot"www.youtube.com
In partnership with Meta Elevate — an online learning platform that provides Black, Hispanic, and Latinx-owned businesses access to 1:1 mentoring, digital skills training, and community — xoNecole teamed up with Franscheska Medina and Maya Washington on IG live recently for a candid conversation about how they’ve embraced the pivot by changing their surroundings to ultimately bring out the best in themselves and their work. Fran, a New York City native, moved from the Big Apple to Portland, Oregon a year ago. Feeling overstimulated by the hustle and bustle of city life, Fran headed to the Pacific Northwest in search of a more easeful life.
Her cross-country move is the backdrop for her new campaign with Meta Elevate— a perfectly-timed commercial that shows how you can level up from wherever you land with the support of free resources like Meta Elevate. Similarly, Maya packed up her life in Los Angeles and moved to Sweden, where she now resides with her husband and adorable daughter. Maya’s life is much more rural and farm-like than it had been in California, but she is thriving in this peaceful new setting while finding her groove as a new mom.
While Maya is steadily building and growing her digital brand as a self-proclaimed “mom coming out of early retirement,” Fran is redefining her own professional grind. “It’s been a year since I moved from New York City to Portland, Oregon,” says Fran. “I think the season I’m in is figuring out how to stay successful while also slowing down.” A slower-paced life has unlocked so many creative possibilities and opportunities for these ladies, and our conversation with them is a well-needed reminder that your success is not tied to your location…especially with the internet at your fingertips. Tapping into a community like Meta Elevate can help Black, Hispanic, and Latinx entrepreneurs and content creators stay connected to like minds and educated on new digital skills and tools that can help scale their businesses.
During a beautiful moment in the conversation, Fran gives Maya her flowers for being an innovator in the digital space. Back when “influencing” was in its infancy and creators were just trying to find their way, Fran says Maya was way ahead of her time. “I give Maya credit for being one of the pioneers in the digital space,” Fran said. “Maya is a one-person machine, and I always tell her she really changed the game on what ads, campaigns, and videos, in general, should look like.”
When asked what advice she’d give content creators, Maya says the key is having faith even when you don’t see the results just yet. “It’s so easy to look at what is, despite you pouring your heart into this thing that may not be giving you the returns that you thought,” she says. “Still operate from a place of love and authenticity. Have faith and do the work. A lot of people are positive thinkers, but that’s the thinking part. You also have to put your faith into work and do the work.”
Fran ultimately encourages content creators and budding entrepreneurs to take full advantage of Meta Elevate’s vast offerings to educate themselves on how to build and grow their businesses online. “It took me ten years to get to the point where I’m making ads at this level,” she says. “I didn’t have those resources in 2010. I love the partnership with Meta Elevate because they’re providing these resources for free. I just think of the people that wouldn’t be able to afford that education and information otherwise. So to amplify a company like this just feels right.”
Watch the full conversation with the link above, and join the Meta Elevate community to connect with fellow businesses and creatives that are #OnTheRiseTogether.
Featured image courtesy of Shameless Maya and Hey Fran Hey
The body keeps score! Trauma can have far-reaching effects on our physical, emotional, and mental health. One area that can be significantly impacted is our sex life. Trauma sticks with us. It lives inside us and our relationships, greatly interfering with our ability to experience pleasure on the deepest of levels. People who have gone through a traumatic experience sometimes can be left feeling emotionally drained and/or have difficulty establishing intimacy. They sometimes even lack a sense of self-worth or find it difficult to be affectionate with a partner.
To learn if your trauma is impacting your sexual relationships, here are some signs to look out for.
1. You avoid sex.
The first sign is a general lack of interest in sexual activity. You may find yourself avoiding or actively running away from any kind of intimacy, whether it be physical or emotional. This could be because you're feeling overwhelmed by the trauma or because you feel like it's not safe to open up emotionally. Either way, it's important to pay attention to what your body and mind are telling you so that you can address the root cause of this behavior.
2. You dissassociate.
When you don’t feel safe in your body, it blocks you from feeling the depths of your sensations. It is not uncommon for people living with trauma to feel disconnected from their bodies. During sex, the brain releases norepinephrine which is the same hormone that floods the brain when experiencing fear. In the case of trauma, your brain sometimes has trouble separating the normal release of this hormone during intimacy from a traumatic experience.
3. You have poor body image.
Trauma and body image issues have a complex relationship. Traumatic events can lead to body dysmorphia, which is an extreme preoccupation with one's physical appearance. People who have suffered from traumatic experiences may be more likely to develop negative thoughts and feelings about their bodies, leading to negative body image. Negative body image can also lead to depression and anxiety.
4. You experience painful sex.
Oftentimes, female trauma survivors suffer from gynecologic issues such as vaginismus, an involuntary contraction of the vaginal muscles during penetration. This condition is caused by violence, childbirth trauma, sexual assault, and emotional and/or psychological trauma. Whenever penetration is attempted, the vaginal muscles tighten up, causing extreme discomfort or pain.
5. You have difficulty maintaining intimacy.
Another sign that trauma is affecting your sex life is the difficulty in maintaining intimacy during sexual activities. This could manifest itself as difficulty staying aroused, difficulty sustaining an erection, difficulty getting into "the mood," or even difficulty communicating openly with a partner about what feels good or doesn't feel good physically and emotionally. All of these issues can point to underlying issues related to the trauma that needs to be addressed before they begin to interfere with relationship dynamics and overall well-being.
6. You have trust issues.
The lack of trust in a sexual partner can be problematic in a variety of ways due to past trauma. First, being vulnerable is unlikely to happen unless you have faith that the other person won't hurt you physically, mentally, or emotionally. Secondly, it is challenging enough to share your wants and needs without the perception that people are inherently dangerous or that sex leads to betrayal or harm. Sex can be disappointing, triggering, or unsatisfactory if trauma has taught you these things.
Trauma has a wide range of effects on our lives, including our sex lives. If any of these signs resonate with you, it's important to take time for introspection and practice self-care so that you can deal with your past experiences in healthy ways.
While the signs of sexual trauma can be difficult to identify, they can be diagnosed through counseling and therapy. Therapy For Black Girls has a wide network of licensed therapists and online resources that can help you get the help you need. Survivors can also contact their Crisis Text Line by texting the word TRIBE to 741741.
Healing takes time, but it can be done with the proper care and attention paid to our minds and bodies.
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Feature image by Andene Sanchez/ Getty Images