GOAL-Digger: Here's Why Tiffney Cambridge Is More Than Just A "Rapper's Ex"
Did the song even surprise you or come as a shock?
It did. I was surprised by the song but I wasn't surprised by the lyrics. I told him because we had a discussion about it, he played it for me, I said, "Boy, you know I don't have no million dollars worth of Birkin bag in my closet, so at least take that part out." So that was funny.
Like I said, I do think that in his mind, Jayceon knows what I'm deserving of and he knows what my expectations are and he knows what I'm able to achieve. All of them. So him actually, he knew it and he knows it, and for him to actually write a song about it, it was like 'Ok, alright!' He knows. He knows what's up with Ms. Cambridge. He knows!'
He and I are so different when it comes to how we handle ourselves. I'm very private and discreet. I don't let everyone know what's going on in my world. I'm not the one to broadcast my business. I just don't believe in letting all your business out there.
[TWEET "I think that just because your eyes see something that doesn't mean your mouth has to say something."]
You see enough things. When you have been a high-profile relationship like I have been in, it's very important to not share everything.
Have you ever heard the saying, 'Sometimes we're meant to be in a man's life to help them become a better man, for another woman.'?
Right, I have. I've heard that before.
Do you kind of feel like with you and Jayceon's experience that's kind of what it is? Was he supposed to learn in that experience with you to be that guy to someone else?
Well, when I think about that question, I don't only think about it in terms of just him, I think about it for myself as well. Is my role, for Jayceon, to be a teacher for him to get him all ripe and ready for the next woman? That could be the case. And it is in his position to have shown me exactly what I want, or what I don't want, when I'm ripe and ready for my next relationship. I think it can go either way. I think our relationship has been a learning ground for both of us. I'm older than him and maybe have more life experience than him and maybe have a different way of governing myself. So it may come across as I'm the older one and I'm the teacher.
So just as much as people may look at me and say, 'He learned on her and she is prepping him for the next person,' I think that the same thing could be said about me. I've been through a lot in this relationship. I've had challenges and struggles that you wouldn't believe. The things that you guys see aren't even half the internal struggle, sacrifices, the hurt that I've been through in my involvement with this man.
I've learned a lot from Jayceon. Learning goes both ways. Sometimes you learn what to do and that could be his learning, I suppose. And sometimes you learn what not to do, and that could be mine. And I think both are equally as important. And I think both will help in future relationships.
You mentioned the age thing and being a little bit older and being able to teach him, but do you feel like age played an ultimate factor in you two separating?
I don't think that a numerical number played a part in it because technically, I'm only 4 1/2 years older than him. Jayceon was born in 1979. I was born in 1975. He was born at the end of 1979 in November, and I was born in July of 1975. So we're technically only 4 1/2 to 5 years apart. So numerically, the age, I'm 40, Jayceon will be 36 in November, so I don't think that played a part. I think the level of maturity played a part.
You can have someone that is 36-years-old that is very mature, knows what they want out of life and can appreciate having a good woman and two beautiful children. And that's their choice. 'I want my woman, I want my family. I am a rapper, but this is what my focus is, so I'm going to do what I'ma have to do and then go on home.' There are 36-year-old men who do think like that. But then there are 36-year-old men who don't think like that. So I think that it is individual to the person and where they are in their lives and where they are in their level of growth and maturity.
So do I feel like the number matters? Jayceon is 36. Ok? You're not 26, 25 or 24 and I'm 40. You're 36. That's not...people try to make it seem like it's suchhhhhh a big gap, like I'm 10 years older than him, and I'm not. We're still right there [in age with] each other. So it's not the age, it's what I'm allowing and what I'm not allowing in our relationship. I'm not the one for a lot of different things so it makes me seem like like an old hag.
Maybe monogamy is not the hip thing. Maybe that's not the young thing. Maybe in this day and age, it's cool to have a harem of females around you, that makes you marketable or makes you hot. Whatever. But for Tiffney Cambridge, it's not for me. I don't do that. I am very old school.
I was born in 1975, I grew up in the 80's. I grew up in a time where relationships and commitment mattered. I grew up in a time where you talk on the phone until you fell asleep on the phone, you wrote love notes--will you be my boyfriend, yes or no?--and it was you two.
I'm not here to tell you, another grown person, how to live their life. I'm not going to force my beliefs or values down your throat. What I'm going to do is remove myself from the situation, and let you do you, and so basically, that's what I've done. And Jayceon and I have [still] managed to maintain a friendship. We have two beautiful kids. And both Cali and Justice, we both want what is best for them. We'll both be in each other's loves forever. We have a very close and special bond. He is the father of my children, and we're always going to be together in that way.
I think a lot of women these days have accepted, 'OK, I guess that's just what men do,' so their new thing now is fighting to be the "main" one. Not fighting for monogamy, but fighting for the "number one spot" on a list of women. And I guess that's something that you just won't allow or do.
No, I don't fight for a spot. The other person can just have it. It's really true. I don't have any problem with it at all. I don't do competitions, I don't do "choose me or her," the other person can just have you. Because if that's your thought process, I don't want you. So she can go and have you. My bishop, Bishop Noel Jones, told me many years ago:
[TWEET "Some battles are worth fighting even if you lose. And some aren't worth fighting even if you win."]
And that has really stuck with me. And it's a philosophy that I live and love by. Because I want to be in a situation where there is no choice. 'I want to be with Tiffney, and that's it.' And that is a turn-on for me. That's what makes my heart sing.
So if there is any competition, there is no competition. Just go on and be with the other person. That's it.
So what would it take to impress the lovely Ms. Cambridge?
I like loyalty. I like a man that is very respectable, career driven. I like a man who has a spiritual sense about himself, who is in tune with God. I love a quiet, calm, confident man. And in my next relationship, I would like to be the one that is lead. I feel like in this relationship I was the leader. So finding someone with the ability to teach me something, to be able to lead me in a positive direction, would be very intriguing to me.
You go, Tiffney! In-between teaching, Tiffney is still on her book tour for her children's book, "The Little Girl Who Lost Her Smile," which you can purchase here. She is also doing motivational speaking engagements on the weekends, and you can keep up with her tour dates (and all things Tiffney) on her official Instagram and Twitter.
Good girls may finish last sometimes, but at least they finish. Which is a lot more than most can say these days!
A modest goddess who keeps it humble between mumbles. I'm a journalism graduate with a HERstory in digital media, print and radio. Roll the credits: Power 96, VH1, xoNecole, EBONY, SOHH. Deemed "Top 20 Women in Media" by Power 105. Bronx made me, Broward raised me.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Your May 2024 Horoscopes Are All About Setting Intentions, Focus, And Self-Discovery
Explore your sign’s 2024 horoscope predictions to learn what is in store for you this year in love, career, and more. Check out the love compatibility of each sign to learn more about zodiac pairings and all things compatibility.
May is a month of intention and about focusing on what you are creating in your life right now. Eclipse Season is over for the time being; Mercury is direct again, yet there are still more opportunities for breakthrough and self-discovery. The month begins with Pluto going retrograde in Aquarius on May 2, signifying the need to reclaim your power right now. Pluto will be retrograde until October 11, and this is a good time to experience a renewal within your belief systems, friendships, and community. After a time of change and regrouping, May is a time to create a new path for yourself and feel more secure in doing so.
Taurus Season is in full bloom, and on May 7 the Moon will be joining the Sun for the New Moon in Taurus. This New Moon is an opportunity for luxury, self-care, stability, and harmony.
When the Moon is in Taurus, we are guided towards taking care of ourselves more, and this is a good time to set your intentions for where you want to experience more ease, love, and TLC in life. This New Moon will be a powerful time for manifestation, so make sure you are focused on what you want to create in your life right now. Mercury then moves out of Aries and into Taurus on May 15th, and perspectives move into the energy of more logic, patience, and practicality.
Mercury in Taurus brings the focus to your finances as well, and this is a good time to ask for a raise or promotion, take care of finances, or build your assets.
What May 2024 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
Gemini Season makes its debut on May 20 this year, and the Sun moving into these air signs makes the energy a little lighter and playful, and by the end of the month, people are looking to have some more fun. With a Full Moon in Sagittarius happening a few days later on May 23, the end of May is an exciting, eye-opening, and adventurous time. The Sagittarius Full Moon is the Flower Moon of the Year, and it’s time you receive yours.
Venus moves into Gemini on May 23 as well, and during this time, relationship matters can feel a little more all over the place. However, this is also a more social, charming, and dynamic time for love as well. While Venus is in Gemini, remember that communication is key, and a more open-minded and flexible approach to matters of the heart is needed.
One of the most important transits of the year happens as May comes to an end, and that is Jupiter's move into Gemini. Jupiter has been in Taurus for the past year, helping us grow and get the full picture when it comes to your stability, relationships, and finances, and Jupiter's move into Gemini brings things into focus when it comes to your self-expression, communication, connections, and joy in life.
Jupiter will be in Gemini from May 25, 2024, to June 9, 2025, and this is the perfect opportunity to connect with your creative genius and meet new people with whom you resonate. May, overall, has a lot of potential for opportunity, insight, and collaboration, and this is the perfect month to set your intentions for the future while also living in the moment with the people you love and who inspire you.
Read for your sun sign and rising sign below to see what May 2024 has in store for you.
ARIES
May is a coming-together month for you, and things are starting to make more sense after Mercury retrograde in your sign for most of last month. You are getting more time within your relationships and close partnerships right now, and the New Moon on May 7, happening in your 2nd house, is when this connection, love, and stability begin to come in for you. You have been asking yourself the important questions and are ready to break ground and create the new beginnings you see for yourself.
With Mars in your sign for the entire month of May, you have a lot of energy and passion at your disposal right now, and you are making things happen for yourself. This is a good time for feeling connected to your body and for seeing positive results regarding your health. Jupiter moves into your house of communication at the end of the month where it will be for the next year, and you are moving into a time of more grace, understanding, and opportunity for self-expression right now, Aries - own your voice.
TAURUS
The Sun is in your sign, and you are shining authentically in who you are, Taurus. May is a beautiful month for growth and a time when you are finding your balance between letting go of the past and remaining true to yourself in the present. The New Moon of the month is happening in your sign on May 7, signifying a time of new beginnings for you and when it comes to your goals in life and your sense of freedom.
Be confident in your desires, and know yourself, Taurus. With all the manifestations that are coming forth for you this month, clarity is one of them.
Mercury enters your sign on May 15, and this is a time of positive communication, connection, and gaining some new wisdom. With Mercury in your sign, be prepared for some extra communication on your hands as people are looking to hear your perspective. Jupiter moves out of your sign and enters Aries on May 25 after being in Taurus for the past year, and the luck you have been experiencing in life transfers to your finances, income, and value systems. Overall, you are finding your way and making sense of it all this month.
GEMINI
May is a time of rebirth for you, Gemini. You are in a good head space this month now that your ruling planet, Mercury, is officially out of retrograde and direct again. This is a powerful month for you when things are turning around for you and some extra good karma and luck are coming your way. With the Sun in your 12th house for most of May, you are getting an opportunity to renew and heal from the past and to gain some new understanding of where you have been in life and what you want to create moving forward.
Gemini Season begins on May 20, and it’s your time to shine! Gemini Season this year is a month full of opportunity and clarity, and you are bringing your best self forward. There is a Full Moon on May 23 in your opposite sign, Sagittarius, and love matters are coming full circle for you now so that you can let go of old belief systems that don’t serve you or your relationships anymore. Your most important astrological transit of 2024 happens at the end of the month on May 25, as Jupiter enters your sign for the next year. Jupiter in your sign signifies good luck, fortune, and personal success in your future.
CANCER
This month is about finding your balance, manifesting, and working together with others, Cancer. It’s about choosing peace and trusting your intuition right now to guide you forward. The Sun is in your 11th house in May, and you are thinking of the big picture and not letting anything get in the way of your vision or purpose. There is a New Moon at the start of the month in this area of your chart, and your power of manifestation is especially strong this month, so make sure you are following your true North and setting the intentions that feel right for you internally.
On May 23, Venus enters your 12th house of endings and closure, and love is about moving on and moving into more healing and emotionally receptive experiences. Relationship matters are moving through a transformation now, and you are learning a lot through your partnerships, both old and new, this month. There is a Full Moon on May 23 as well, and this Full Moon will be bringing up old work, projects, and intentions; it’s time to congratulate yourself for your successes and how far you come, as others will want to support you more right now as well.
LEO
Over the next month, you are getting the opportunity to stand your ground, speak up for yourself, and claim your space, Leo. This month is about being your biggest cheerleader and seeing yourself in the way you wish others to see you. The Sun is in your 10th house for most of May, and you are focused on taking action and going after your dreams right now. The New Moon on May 7 is a good time to set your intentions for said goals and dreams and to really believe in yourself.
On May 23, there is a Full Moon in fellow fire sign Sagittarius, happening in an area of your chart that has to do with your happiness, romance, creative self-expression, and overall joy for life. You are getting the full picture of where your priorities are or need to be, and are bringing more attention to the things that are going to truly make you happy and fulfilled at the end of the day. Jupiter enters Gemini on the same day where it will remain until 2025, and this move is expanding things for you when it comes to your friendships, community, and social networks.
VIRGO
May is a month of connecting with your soul and creating harmony in your life, Virgo. You are moving into a time of greater freedom and authenticity, and May is a good month for travel for you. With a New Moon in Taurus at the beginning of the month, you are expanding your horizons and gaining some much-needed inspiration. This is the time to do things differently and to not be afraid to take risks, and a leap of faith in yourself. You are feeling a little more optimistic in May, and this is creating an opening in your life.
On May 23, we have a Full Moon in your 4th house of home and family, and this is a good time for experiencing closure in this area of your life, and like things are coming full circle for you here. The first half of the month is all about adventure, and the second half of May, you are looking to build in your stability. Jupiter moves into your 10th house of career and success before the month ends, and you enter a year-long transit that will be positively influencing and expanding your reputation and goals in life.
LIBRA
May is an opportunity to learn, inspire, and spend some more time with the people who bring this energy out of you, Libra. The month begins with Pluto going retrograde in your 5th house of love, and you need some more time to grasp what is going on in your heart and how you can find your power in life here more. There is a lot to learn and discover this month, and the New Moon on May 7 will be an eye-opening and transformative moment for you where you can dive deep into your love life and commitments and see where a new beginning may be necessary.
There is a Full Moon happening later in the month and this Full Moon will be bringing forth spiritual guidance into your life. This is a Full Moon to connect, communicate, and share your insights and ideas with others. On May 25, Jupiter enters Gemini and moves into your 9th house of adventure, and you are entering a year of travel, enlightenment, spirituality, and higher education. Your mind is your gift right now; trust you have everything you need to experience greatness and be open to meeting new people who will help you get there.
SCORPIO
This month is about remaining open and receptive to what is possible for you and your future, Scorpio. You are in a good space to receive your due blessings and rewards, but your heart must be open to receive them. Your ruling planet, Pluto, goes retrograde at the start of the month on May 2, and this Pluto retro transit will allow you to rebuild your vision for the home, and help you figure out where you can bring more of yourself into your surroundings.
A lot of the energy of the month is in your opposite sign, Taurus, meaning it’s in your love and partnership zones.
May is one of the most significant months of love for you out of the year, and the intentions you set for your relationships on the New Moon this month will be creating magic in your love life for the rest of the year. On May 23, there is a Full Moon in the sign just after yours, bringing attention to your finances, income, and self-confidence in it all. The end of May is a time to focus a little more on your stability in life and to take a look at your finances. This is a good time to clean your purse or wallet, create some feng shui, and go over your assets.
SAGITTARIUS
Your guidance for the month is to go with the flow and trust your instincts, Sagittarius. The New Moon happening on the 7th is a new door opening for you, your health, and your daily routine, and you are focused on what is going to be best for you and your well-being overall. You are trusting your next steps ahead and remaining grounded with where things are in the meantime. It’s all about trust right now and how much of it you can have for yourself.
The Full Moon of the month will be in your sign on May 23rd, and this is a powerful Full Moon for you of closure, clarity, and self-confidence. You are letting go of what doesn’t resonate with who you are now and what you want to expand in your life. This is a good time to say your affirmations, meditate, and get out of your own head. Before the month ends, your ruling planet, Jupiter, enters your opposite sign, Gemini, and your love life gets an extra boost of good luck right now. Jupiter will be in your 7th house of partnership until 2025, and you are entering a year of harmony, Sagittarius.
CAPRICORN
Abundance is your birthright, and you are tapping into this energy this month, Capricorn. May is a month full of opportunities for you, and a lot of this good juju is coming through for you romantically right now. The Sun is in your 5th house of the heart for most of the month, and there is a New Moon here on May 7 as well.
At the beginning of May, make sure you are focused on communicating clearly, owning your passions in life, and having some more fun with love and the romance that wants to bloom for you here.
With Mercury entering your 5th house on May 15 as well, you could be receiving a surprise message or be having some interesting conversations right now that switch things up for you in love. On May 25, Jupiter moves into an area of your chart having to do with your health, lifestyle, and work life, and you are overall going to be coming into balance more here and experiencing some fortunate opportunities at work and within your daily routine. Overall, May is a month that is setting you up for success, Capricorn.
AQUARIUS
May is an opportunity for you to connect, move forward, and learn more about yourself and your heart, Aquarius. You are paying attention to the signs right now and making sense of things that may have gone past you before. With Pluto going retrograde in your sign as the month begins on May 2, you are someone who will be moving through a journey of self-discovery for the rest of the year and will be figuring out where your true power is in life and how to hone in on it more.
The New Moon in Taurus on May 7 is a new beginning for you and your home life, and a lot of this month will be about finding those people and spaces that feel like home to you and that make you feel supported in who you are. Jupiter enters a fellow air sign on May 25, and Jupiter in Gemini brings in a year ahead of romance, creativity, confidence, and finding your joy. Things are shifting big time in your life right now, but you are figuring out what works for you and what doesn’t.
PISCES
It's time to protect your energy and create boundaries where needed, Pisces. May is a month of checking in with yourself and emotionally regulating before moving forward. Pluto goes retrograde at the start of the month and will be retrograde in your 12th house of closure, secrets, and healing until October. What this means for you is a chance at clarity of the heart, but this transit can also bring up old issues or power struggles of the past. Remember to learn from past experiences and decide for yourself today how you want things to go for you from here.
There is a Full Moon in Sagittarius on May 23, and being a mutable sign like Sagittarius, you can tap into the potential of this Full Moon effectively. This is the time to turn a page within your career or professional world and see some resolution here. Before the month ends Jupiter enters your house of home, family, and history, and you are going to be opening your mind on these matters over the next year. You could be expanding the home, moving, or experiencing a deep sense of healing here now.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole