I love my male friends. I really do. There are a billion reasons why, but one of them is because I find myself having the most random conversations with them about stuff that I probably wouldn't give too much credence to otherwise. Take bathing, for example. On the rest and relaxation tip, there aren't too many things that I enjoy more than soaking in the bathtub. Not only does it feel good, but it comes with all sorts of health benefits including the fact that it destresses us, reduces bodily inflammation, lowers our blood pressure, burns calories (some experts say even as much as a long walk does) and even strengthens our immune system.
As I was sharing some of this with a male buddy of mine, he wasn't moved in the least. He actually loathes baths and it's for one main reason. "Shellie, baths are gross. How are you getting clean when you are washing up in your own dirt?" I mean, he kinda has a point. Not a strong enough one for me to quit taking baths altogether, but definitely enough of one to make me do some digging around to see if I'm doing this whole bathing thing right. Come to find out, there were a few areas I could stand to improve on. Hmph. Bathing etiquette. Who knew?
And how can you know if you're bathing "right" or "wrong? Go down this checklist. How many things are you able to nod your head up and down about?
1. Thoroughly Clean Your Bathtub
Brace yourselves because, out of all of the things that I'm about to share, this point will probably evoke the most "ewws".
Did you know that the average bathtub contains 100 times more germs than—wait for it—a trash can? A TRASH CAN.
This is why, before I even get into the rights and wrongs of bath time, it really is important to mention that bathtubs should be thoroughly cleaned after each and every use. If you'd like a few refresher tips on how to get yours to shine and sparkle, there are a couple of good tips here, here and here.
2. Decide What Type of Bath You Want to Take
Not all baths are created equal. Yep, in their own special way, each one has a theme. Although there are dozens of combinations, the ones that come off the top of my head is the stress-relieving bath, the pain-decreasing bath, the "Calgon, take me away" bath, the insomniac bath and the romantic bath. Based on whatever it is that you're trying to achieve up in that tub of yours, that will let you know what to bring.
For instance, if you're taking a bath after working out (if this is the case, try and wait an hour; your body is "too hot" for hot water following exercising and cool water could "shock" your system), bring in some Epsom salt. If it's a bath to help you to sleep, some lavender oil could do you a world of good. Or, if you plan on bringing someone in there with you, a few rose petals and a bottle of wine—which you were probably going to use regardless—will set the scene perfectly.
3. Have Herbal Tea, DIY Body Wash and Essential Oils on Tap
One of the best ways to get herbs into your pores is to put a couple of herbal tea bags into your bathwater (if you want to learn how to make some lavender tea bags, click here). If you're wondering what some of the best herbs for bathing are—chamomile will relax you; ginger root will detox you; comfrey leaf will heal wounds and reduce scars; calendula will relieve muscle spasms (if you drink it, it can help to regulate your period too) and peppermint will boost your immune system.
Two other things that you should have close by is body wash and some essential oils that you can drop into your bathwater. On the body wash tip, I'm a huge fan of making your own (some cool YouTube videos include "DIY African Black Soap Acne Wash, Body Wash, and Shampoo", "How to Make Homemade Natural Bodywash" and "How to Make Natural Body Wash | Honey Coconut Body Wash"). As far as oils go, eucalyptus will help to clear your sinuses; bergamot will relax you; a combo of sage and mint will help to balance you out; citrus will reenergize you and cloves and cedarwood will relieve stress.
4. Use the Right Kind of Soap (and Not Too Much of It)
Is there such a thing as using too much soap? Indeed, there is. If you "over-wash", it can dry out your skin. Not only that, but sometimes too much soap can desensitize your skin to the ingredients in it to the point where the soap no longer fights off the germs that it's created to remove.
If you're wondering what kind of soaps will do your body good while you're taking a bath, Byrdie did a pretty cool write up on the best ones, based on your skin types and needs, for 2019. You can check it out here.
Speaking of feeling clean and smelling fresh, if you're still using a popular commercial brand of deodorant, another read that's worth your time is "How to Detox Your Armpits and Switch to a Nontoxic Deodorant". More and more reasons are coming out for why using "typical" deodorant is not good, but if you want to add another to your list, if you apply it right after getting out of the tub, it can dry out your armpits, making them all itchy and irritated. So yeah…don't do that (anymore).
5. Do Not Shave Immediately Before Bathing
A mistake that I sometimes make on my pedicure appointment days is shaving my legs. The reason why this is such a no-no is because when you shave, it opens up your pores and sometimes creates nicks in your skin too. The bacteria and germs that are in your pedi or bathwater can get into those places; you definitely don't want that. Another problem that can arise from shaving before bathing is it could cause your pores to look dry and dull. So yeah, wait until you are out of the tub before pulling out your razor.
By the way, if you're in the market for a new all-natural shaving product, check out "7 Best Organic & Natural Shaving Creams For Men + Women".
6. Warm Up the Bathroom
Here's something that I found to be interesting. Did you know that it's always best to have your bathroom temperature and the temp of your bath water to be as close to being the same as possible? The reason why is because our body is best able to perceive temperatures, in general, by comparing our internal temperature to that of the temps that are around us. I'm pretty sure you don't want it to be a sauna up in there, so around 70 degrees is pretty good.
7. Make Sure the Bathwater Is Lukewarm
As far as bathwater temperatures go, anything above 39 degrees Celsius or 102.2 Fahrenheit can result in a psychological effect that could be counterproductive for your health. The reason why super hot water isn't the best is because the blood vessels on our skin's surface dilate when they touch hot water; that can sometimes result in a heavier blood flow than we need which could put a slight amount of strain on our heart. On the flip side, if the water is too cool, it narrows our blood vessels which isn't good either.
If you want to use cold water, reserve it for showers that are under seven minutes instead. It's a good final rinse on hair wash days because it will seal your cuticles, and a good final rinse for your skin because it can relieve sore muscles while closing up your pores.
8. Add Some Honey and/or Olive Oil to It
If it seems like, no matter what you do, you can't seem to get your skin soft enough, try adding a ½ cup of honey and/or ¼ cup of olive oil. Honey is a natural humectant (it draws moisture into the skin from the water that it's around) and olive oil is loaded with all sorts of antioxidants and antibacterial properties that will protect your skin, seal in moisture and keep your skin baby soft smooth.
Just make sure to pour these things under a faucet of warm running water. That way, they will dissolve fully.
9. Cleanse, Then Remove Your Loofah/Sponge/Scrubber Immediately Following
The thing that you're using to exfoliate your body is removing tons of bacteria and dead skin cells. That's why, once you're done using it, it's not good enough to simply run it underneath your faucet and hang it up. You need to wash your loofah, sponge or body scrubber and then place it somewhere where it can thoroughly dry out. Otherwise, you are setting yourself up to have a moldy situation on your hands.
As far as how to clean these items, some experts recommend soaking them in bleach for five minutes and then thoroughly rinsing them out. They also say that it's a good idea to replace your loofah or sponge every 3-4 weeks (how long have you had yours?), that you should never use it on your face or va-jay-jay and, to keep bacteria from creeping into your skin, you should definitely avoid using it for 1-2 days after you shave.
10. Time Your Towel Drying
Your towel is going to dry you off and keep your warm, no doubt about that. But it's also going to remove any remnants of bacteria off of your skin; that's why it's not a good idea to keep it wrapped around you for longer than 15 minutes or so.
Between the dampness of your skin and the towel itself, that could trap in moisture and bacteria which is a breeding ground for more germs.
Also, make sure not to use the same towels for the rest of your life. If you're curious about why I say that, I wrote more about it in the piece "When Should You Replace Underwear, Make-Up, Bedding, Washcloths & Towels?".
BONUS: Considering Taking a Shower---First
And then, a bonus, for my male friend and anyone who thinks like him. If, no matter what, you just can't seem to shake the thought of dirt and soap scum floating in your bathwater, you can always take a shower, clean the tub and then soak in the bath. That way you can feel clean and still reap the rewards of bathing. Hey, it's just a thought.
Now let me get off of this thing and take a bath. The right way.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
Why I Am No Longer Using Washcloths & Loofahs To Shower
9 All-Natural Ways To Quench Dehydrated Skin
Love On Yourself With These 7 All-Natural DIY Vaginal Washes
Feature image by Shutterstock
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
The Mecca Of Fashion: The Top Street Style Moments At Howard Homecoming
Outfits were planned, bags were packed, and cameras were ready to capture Howard University's collegiate spirit during its centennial Homecoming celebration. Not only does it hold the number one ranking as the most elite Historically Black College and University or its top performing academics, diversity of students and alumni, but the HBCU also leaves a legacy of style and grace.
The essence of effortless poise and refinement shines bright through the iconic university colors of indigo blue, red, and white. Every October, Howard University students, alumni, staff, and friends gather on the prestigious campus in Washington, D.C. to take part in time-honored traditions and events, which is Homecoming. This year's theme, “The Meccaverse,” was a week-long celebration of Howard University’s heritage, including the Homecoming football game and Bison Pep Rally, the Fashion Show, Greek Life Step Show, Homecoming Day of Service, Lavender Reception, and the iconic Yard Fest Concert.
As 2024 marked the 100th anniversary of the Howard Bison trek back to The Mecca and after two years of virtual events due to the COVID-19 pandemic, this was to be a celebration of a lifetime. We enlisted HU alumnus Sharmaine Harris, a luxury retail buyer, as she revisited her alma mater as eyes on the yard for fashion-forward outfits mixed with personal style and campus pride for the weeklong celebration.
Before we get to the looks, discover how attending Howard University impacted her career in fashion and her day-to-day style:
Credit: Sharmaine and Friends
xoNecole: Describe your personal style. Did attending Howard have any impact on developing it?
Sharmaine: Howard taught me that there’s no such thing as being TOO dressed. There’s always a reason to “put it on” and look presentable, even if it’s just for a day of classes. Standing out was celebrated and encouraged with my peers embracing the opportunity, giving me the confidence to try new styles and trends.
xoNecole: How did Howard shape your career as a luxury buyer?
Sharmaine: I studied Fashion Merchandising, through which I was fortunate to have professors who were very connected to the industry and able to give first-hand accounts of opportunities and what to expect post-college. I was also able to build a network through my peers and other Howard Alum, which has opened doors to endless possibilities both within fashion as well as daily life.
The same confidence instilled in me through my style has also been rooted deeply within me as I step into any role or project I’m faced with throughout my career.
xoNecole: This year marked Howard’s 100th-anniversary Homecoming celebration. Can you describe what the weekend looked and felt like?
Sharmaine: I’ve gone to many Howard Homecomings since graduating, but this year’s 100th anniversary felt like a huge family reunion filled with nothing but love. It was beautiful to see so many Bison return home looking great and radiating joy. It was beautiful!
xoNecole: What makes Howard fashion different from other HBCUs?
Sharmaine: Being that Howard is The Mecca, we have such a diverse population with each individual having their own spin on fashion. Getting dressed is second nature for us, but the layered confidence is our secret ingredient to make any look come together. Through that comfortability to push barriers, we have a legacy of setting trends, as indicated by the many alumni we have in the fashion and entertainment industry.
Keep scrolling for the top street style moments from The Mecca's Homecoming weekend:
Credit: Lacey Gallagher
Credit: Alan Henderson
Credit: JaLynn Davis
Credit: Dylan Davis
Credit: Caleb Smith
Credit: Kendall W.
Credit: Jordyn Finney
Credit: Vanessa Nneoma
Credit: Dr. Mariah Sankey-Thomas
Credit: Caleb MacBruce
Credit: Tiffany Battle
Credit: Teniola
Credit: Ilahi Creary
Credit: Nicolas Ryan Grant
Credit: Dylan Davis
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image courtesy of Sharmaine Harris
The reality is that you can catch a cold any time of the year. However, if you’ve ever wondered why it seems that you’re more susceptible to coming down with a cold or the flu during the fall and winter, things like cold air being able to weaken your immunity, you spending more time indoors in close proximity to other people and you even taking in more sugary foods during the holidays (that can increase your blood sugar levels, cause bodily inflammation and make it harder for your body’s cells to fight against bacteria) — they all play major roles.
The good news is if you’re someone who would prefer to take a more holistic approach to healing from the cold or flu (at least as much as you possibly can), there are some essential oils that are actually pretty effective. Since, at the end of the day, they are simply a concentrated form of plant extracts that contain antibiotic and antimicrobial properties and since they also can help to reduce inflammation, decrease stress, and so much more — before you feel a sore throat or a bout of the sniffles coming up, make sure that you have at least a couple of the following essential oils in your possession (to put into a diffuser, mix with a carrier oil to rub on your back or chest or even to sprinkle onto your pillowcases), please.
The Best Essential Oils for Colds and the Flu
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1. Cinnamon Oil for Colds and the Flu
Whenever I’ve shouted out cinnamon oil on this platform, it’s pretty much in the realm of sexual pleasure (check out “12 'Sex Condiments' That Can Make Coitus Even More...Delicious” and “10 Ways To Have An 'Extra Sweet' Vagina”); however, please believe that it can help you out in other departments too. If you want to boost your moods, improve your oral health, reduce your blood sugar levels, lower the effect that fatty meats have on your system, or even reduce the inflammation that is associated with breakouts or accelerate your hair growth, cinnamon oil is great.
Since cinnamon oil also has really powerful antibacterial, antifungal, and antioxidant properties, it’s a good ingredient if you like to make your own household cleaning products in order to keep germs at bay or if you want to put it into a diffuser in order to create an all-natural decongestant.
2. Thyme Essential Oil for Colds and the Flu
Thyme is an herb from the mint family that a lot of people like to cook with. It’s got properties in it that can do everything from help clear up acne and lower your blood pressure to speed up the healing process of yeast infections and other bacteria-related ones. Something else that’s impressive about thyme is studies reveal that it can help to decrease the volume of cancer tumors that are associated with colon cancer and it can help to slow down the growth of breast cancer cells as well.
And yes, thyme is excellent if you’re trying to treat a cold or the flu. One reason is that it’s packed with vitamins (including vitamin C) that will help to give your immune system a boost. Also, thyme can help to reduce the inflammation that can lead to coughing.
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3. Lemon Oil for Colds
Lemon oil is bomb; there’s simply no other way to put it. The properties in it have been proven to be able to ease morning sickness for pregnant women, reduce symptoms that are directly associated with depression and anxiety, kill the kind of bacteria that can lead to skin inflammation and cell damage, improve digestion issues (including relieving constipation), boost your brain power, get rid of bad breath, help to prevent cavities and so much more.
Because it is an antibacterial oil, you can use lemon oil as an all-natural disinfectant ingredient to clean your bathroom and doorknobs (you know, places that tend to carry a lot of germs), as well as wash your laundry. Lemon oil is also great for detoxing your system, strengthening your immunity, reducing cough, and soothing a sore throat.
4. Chamomile Oil for Colds and the Flu
Usually, when the subject of chamomile comes up (at least on this platform), it’s in the form of tea. Chamomile tea reduces stress. Chamomile tea soothes your scalp and helps to prevent split ends. Chamomile tea is even good for your vaginal health. Okay, but what about when it’s in the form of an essential oil? What are the ways that it can benefit you then? For starters, chamomile oil can help to reduce anxiety and depression, can bring relief if you’re dealing with something like carpal tunnel syndrome, and it can definitely help you to sleep better.
Since a good night’s rest actually helps you to prevent catching a cold or coming down with the flu in the first place (because sleep helps to keep your immune system in peak condition), that’s one reason why chamomile oil makes this list. Another is the fact that studies have proven that chamomile has a way of making the symptoms that are directly associated with the common cold easier to deal with.
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5. Peppermint Oil for Colds and the Flu
Peppermint oil is powerful. It increases blood circulation, reduces gas, eases nausea, helps to keep your skin from itching, soothes headaches, and can help to stimulate your scalp so that healthier hair is able to grow out of it. Something else that’s awesome about peppermint oil is its antimicrobial properties can help to destroy bacteria and yeast, which makes it ideal for treating things like athlete’s foot and something that I am susceptible to, tinea versicolor (a type of skin fungal infection).
If you want to heal from the flu as soon as possible, there are studies that reveal that peppermint oil contains antiviral properties, it can help to reduce any excessive mucus that may be in your system, and it can help to reduce your fever, too. As far as colds go, the menthol in peppermint oil can bring healing to a sore throat or an irritating cough.
6. Cajuput (White Samet) Essential Oils for Colds and the Flu
If you’ve never heard of cajuput essential oil before, don’t feel bad — I seriously doubt most folks have. Long story short, it’s a type of oil that’s made from the cajuput trees, which are popular in Southeast Asia and Australia. As far as its health benefits, your skin will like it because its strong antibacterial properties can help to prevent pimples. Your hair will like it because it can help to keep your scalp nice and healthy. Some people also say that it can be helpful when it comes to relieving the discomfort of a toothache or muscle and/or joint discomfort.
What particularly caught my interest about this oil is cajuput is not only used by individuals to speed up the healing process of the common cold, some studies are saying that its antiseptic and anti-inflammatory properties may just slow down COVID too. Listen, since COVID is known for peaking during late fall and winter, it certainly couldn’t hurt to have some cajuput oil in your bathroom cabinet.
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7. Camphor Oil for Colds and the Flu
Camphor oil ain’t nothin’ to play with. The reason why I say that is because it’s a potent organic compound known as a terpene that comes from the wood of camphor trees. The benefits that come from applying camphor oil are it can help to relieve skin irritation, treat toenail fungus, reduce the discomfort that is associated with arthritis and migraine headaches, and if you’re someone who gets muscle cramps from working out, due to its antispasmodic and relaxant properties, it can help out in that department too.
And why would you want to consider using it if you have a cold or the flu? Well, thanks to its antibacterial, antifungal, and anti-inflammatory properties, camphor oil is a pretty effective decongestant; plus, it can help to decrease any coughing fits that you may have (especially during the night). Just make sure that, with this one especially, you use it with the “a little bit goes a very long way” approach.
8. Tea Tree Oil for Colds and the Flu
Wanna knock a zit out overnight? Unless it’s a blind pimple (because sometimes those are deeper beneath the surface than you might think), applying some tea tree oil to it will almost certainly get it done. What are some other ways that you can literally apply tea tree oil to your life? Since it has both antimicrobial and anti-inflammatory properties (ones that are hella potent, too), this is an oil that can help to reduce dandruff, heal eczema, treat nail fungus, fight gingivitis, heal wounds, and, because tea tree oil also contains antifungal properties, it can bring relief to irritated skin that is associated with a yeast infection (so long as you dilute it first).
You definitely need this type of oil around during cold and flu season because it can be a disinfectant that kills not only the germs that cause those viruses but the coronavirus as well. That’s actually why some people use it as a main ingredient in their DIY hand sanitizer (a recipe for how to make your own is here).
9. Bergamot Oil for Colds and the Flu
Bergamot is a type of citrus fruit that grows in southern Italy. As an essential oil, it’s good for you because it helps to decrease stress levels, lower your cholesterol levels, reduce bodily inflammation and pain, is a great spot treatment for zits, and can even destroy the bacteria that is associated with food poisoning. Aside from all of this, bergamot oil is also known for helping to soothe psoriasis and reduce abdominal fat, and it provides an all-natural alternative if you’re looking for a way to treat insomnia.
As far as the flu and even COVID goes, you definitely need some bergamot oil in your life. The potent antiviral properties that it contains can be therapeutic for when you inhale the vapors from the oil. Just make sure to keep in mind that since the oil is so powerful, you don’t need a ton of it. Thinking that less is more is wise.
10. Eucalyptus Oil for Colds and the Flu
And finally, eucalyptus. Eucalyptus oil smells like…the woods-meets mint-meets a medicine cabinet. That’s why I personally wouldn’t recommend it as a fragrance; however, if you want something that will kill bacteria, heal cold sores, level out your blood sugar levels, ease joint pain, or cause your breath to be fresher — this is the essential oil that you want.
And definitely, now that the cold and flu season is here,get some eucalyptus oil in case you need to break up congestion, decrease your cough, or simply don’t want to struggle so much to breathe out of your nose. It’s a signature oil that will make healing these types of viruses easier…so that you can enjoy all that fall and winter have to offer, y’all.
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