November 5 taught us a lot. November 6 started the beginning of a social media cleanse of all the creators whose values don’t necessarily align with mine. Because we can’t just "agree to disagree" when it comes to my human and civil rights.
Social media gets a bad rap sometimes, but let's be real – it's a game-changer for social justice. We've seen how it can give a voice to those who've been silenced, bring communities together, and push for real change. It's on us to use this power responsibly. By sharing info, raising awareness, and speaking up for what we believe in, we can help build a fairer world.
Whether it's supporting movements like Black Lives Matter, fighting for LGBTQ+ rights, or pushing for a greener planet, social media lets us connect, learn, and inspire action.
But remember, posting and retweeting is just the start. Real change happens when we get involved offline, think critically, and challenge the status quo. We need to go beyond just "looking" like we care and put in the work to fix the root of the problems.
In the wake of that cheeto being elected again, we found out about some of the popular TikTokers and their support of him. But like my girl Eni said, “A lot of you would not be as disappointed in your favorite influencers right now if you made more Black women your favorite influencers.”
@theasiafrances If youre on black tiktok younwould know that theires nothing new on the other side ! Creators: theemillennialmanager, jaydanotpinkettsmith, _simplystephh #ladyinthebathroom #blacktiktok
From The Lady in The Bathroom to Nara Smith, there were some surprises on the MAGA front. It also reminds me of my idea to have non-Black folks request access to our culture before appropriating it. No need to dance to GloRilla in your bathroom if you ain’t Black or don’t have a permission slip signed by us.
Now, I am thankful I didn’t have to cleanse my feed too much because I support Black women in all ways, always. In case you needed some help finding Black Girl Magic on TikTok, ahead, find some of our faves.
@EniGivenSunday
@enigivensunday Its the dress
Eni is a vibrant creator based in NYC who transitioned from a career in law to self-employment, using her platform to share a mix of lifestyle, humor, and travel content. Her videos often provide thoughtful commentary on life experiences, such as navigating solo travel as a Black woman, finding joy in new beginnings, and embracing change. Eni also offers engaging daily vlogs, travel diaries, and beauty content, blending authenticity with a touch of wit. She’s celebrated for her ability to connect with her audience through relatable insights and an inspiring journey of self-discovery.
@JazTurner16
@jazturner16 cause i loveee to smell delicioussss
Jaz Turner embodies empowerment and individuality through her content. From bold fashion statements to uplifting messages, Jaz inspires her audience to embrace their personal style and inner strength. Her creative videos highlight her vibrant personality and passion for self-expression, making her a standout voice in the fashion and lifestyle space.
@Kristy.Sarah
@kristy.sarah his personal alarm clock
Kristy Sarah is one-half of the hilarious and viral couple behind @kristy.sarah. Known for their playful pranks, relationship skits, and family-centered content, Kristy and her husband provide endless laughs. Beyond humor, Kristy also shares snippets of their daily life, parenting moments, and relationship advice, making her a must-follow for comedy and lifestyle enthusiasts.
@JeneeNaylor
@jeneenaylor Airport Fit
Jenee is a TikTok creator celebrated for her expertise in style and beauty. She shares content ranging from outfit inspiration, seasonal fashion guides, and beauty tips to behind-the-scenes glimpses of her partnerships with brands like Victoria’s Secret and Bobbi Brown. As a style expert, she curates eclectic looks that balance sophistication and fun, offering tips for everything from everyday outfits to holiday-themed ensembles. Her videos often showcase her vibrant personality, making her content relatable and aspirational for her followers.
@JaylaBrenae5
@jaylabrenae5 They are now fully as invested as us and want to go visit the new build every day too😭💕 #customhome #homebuilding #homebuild #ourhenryhome #thehenryresidence
Jayla Henry is a rising star in the lifestyle space on TikTok. Based in Dallas, Texas, known for her engaging lifestyle content and heartfelt storytelling. Her platform serves as a video diary where she shares relatable moments from her life as a mom, her family milestones, and everyday experiences. She often highlights her journey with her son, showcasing tender moments that resonate with her audience, such as celebrating his milestones and navigating the joys and challenges of motherhood. You’ll quickly fall in love with her husband Tony and two kiddos, Nyla B and Braylon.
@EaseWithAlex
@easewithalex #GentleReminder: You are not doing too much. #NotetoSelf #fypツ #relationships #mid30s #healingjourney
Alex Elle is a wellness and self-care advocate who uses her platform to promote healing and personal growth. As a celebrated writer and poet, her content is a mix of affirmations, introspective talks, and mental health tips. Alex's soothing voice and thoughtful insights provide a safe space for followers looking to engage in mindfulness and self-love practices.
@JaydaPickettNotSmith
@jaydanotpinkettsmith MUSTAAAAARRRRRD #kendricklamar #djmustard #jaydanotpinkettsmith #bigjayda❤️🔥 #blacktiktok #blackfyp #fypシ #fyp #newmusicfriday #newmusic #hiphop #calitiktok
Jayda Pickett Not Smith has always been the only lady in the bathroom that matters. I can’t tell you the number of times she’s put me on to a trending sound. Also known as Big Jayda, she is a Chicago-based TikTok creator who captivates her audience with nostalgic content and her love for music. Her videos often feature throwbacks to early 2000s R&B and hip-hop, creative mashups, and relatable commentary about life as a music enthusiast.
Known for her vibrant personality, she blends humor and music appreciation, showcasing her deep connection to cultural moments from past decades. Jayda's content often sparks feelings of nostalgia while highlighting her sharp wit and engaging storytelling style.
@Meccavelli
@meccavellii #greenscreen
Meccavelli is a standout creator known for her raw and honest takes on social issues, culture, and life as a Black woman. She seamlessly blends humor with deep discussions, creating a space where her followers feel seen and heard. Meccavelli's charismatic delivery and thought-provoking content make her a must-follow for those who enjoy smart, impactful commentary.
@QuenBlackwell
@quenblackwell @Duke Dennis
Quen Blackwell, often referred to as Quen, is a comedic powerhouse with a larger-than-life personality. Her content ranges from hilarious rants and absurd skits to candid talks about mental health and self-acceptance. Quen's unpredictable humor and relatability have made her one of TikTok's most beloved and unique voices.
@JackieAina
@jackieaina Black women you are doing amazing with what you can and what you have 😘🫶🏾 #blackwomentiktok #blackwomenluxury
Jackie Aina is a beauty industry icon known for her makeup tutorials, product reviews, and strong advocacy for inclusivity. On TikTok, she brings her expertise in beauty along with a dose of her signature humor and sass. Jackie’s candid takes on beauty trends, skincare, and fashion make her a go-to for anyone seeking honest advice and a good laugh. Not to mention, her cleaning videos scratch the brain in the most appropriate way.
@ShariDyonne
@sharidyonne Had to get in my self care bag real quiicckkk #selfcare #naturalhair
Shari is a versatile TikTok creator specializing in food, lifestyle, and travel content. She shares recipes, food reviews, and her experiences exploring unique culinary delights, often adding a touch of humor and authenticity. Shari also highlights moments from her daily life, such as house hunting, interior decorating, and trips to destinations like Jamaica, blending personal stories with aspirational content. Her vibrant personality and relatable approach have garnered her a loyal following, with her platform serving as a source of inspiration for embracing life’s adventures.
@AllyiahsFace
@allyiahsface My natural hair is loving this glow out using @Kérastase Elixir ultime! #KerastasePartner Look at how bouncy and shiny! I’m in love #KerastaseGlowOut Available @sephora
This OG YouTuber is the ultimate destination for beauty and lifestyle inspiration. Known for her polished aesthetic and relatable personality, Allyiah delivers makeup tutorials, skincare tips, and glimpses into her glamorous yet approachable life. Her content exudes confidence and elegance, making her a go-to creator for anyone looking to elevate their everyday routine. Whether it’s a candid GRWM or an in-depth beauty haul, Allyiah keeps her audience hooked with her vibrant energy and expert recommendations.
@SerenaPagee
@serenapagee this was supposed to be a cute video..😂😂😂
If you’re not a Serena Page fan, now’s the time. The Love Island USA winner blends humor, authenticity, and relatability in her content, making her an instant favorite. Her witty takes on everyday situations and laugh-out-loud storytelling resonate with audiences looking for a good chuckle and a dose of realness. Serena’s ability to turn the mundane into something hilarious is unmatched, and her charismatic personality keeps followers coming back for more. Not to mention, we love every moment she shares with PPG and Kordell.
@KennedyandKeyonce
@kennedyandkeyonce Yes I need a steamer but more importantly…which purse should I wear?
Kennedy absolutely captivates TikTok with their infectious personality and authentic content. From hilarious skits to relatable hair moments, she brings joy and laughter to her audience. Kennedy’s posts often explore relatable scenarios with a comedic twist, making her videos enjoyable and widely relatable. Additionally, she uses TikTok LIVE to connect with her audience in real-time, fostering an interactive and personal connection.
@TaylorAnise
@tayloranise not as flat, but so much easier 😅 #naturalhairtiktok #naturalhairtips
Taylor Anise is a beauty and skincare enthusiast who shares expert tips with her audience in an approachable and engaging way. Her tutorials, product reviews, and self-care routines exude elegance and practicality. Taylor’s passion for helping her followers look and feel their best shines through in her thoughtful and informative content. Whether it’s a twist-out tutorial or a review on scalp oils, we trust Taylor.
@Lexssentials
@lexssentials My current fixation meal: lamb with fries + caesar salad 🤍 #cookwithme #cookingvlog #minivlog #comfortmeals #foodcravings #easyrecipe
Lex’s page is a hub for all things wellness, self-care, and minimalism. Lex's content offers calming energy, thoughtful tips, and easy-to-follow hacks for improving your daily life. Her focus on intentional living and nurturing both mind and body resonates with followers seeking balance and inspiration. She makes us want to get in our baking bag every Sunday.
@Aniyahmorinia
@aniyahmorinia the long awaited slick back bun tutorial! 🫡 #slickbackbun #slickback #blackgirlhairstyles #blackgirlhairtutorial
Aniyah brings nothing but joy and vibrance to TikTok through her lively and relatable content. Whether she’s sharing candid moments, creative skits, or motivational messages, Aniyah’s energy is so good. Her ability to connect with her audience through humor and positivity makes her a standout creator in the lifestyle space. Aniyah’s perspective as a 20-something living in NYC gives us a little Sex and The City.
@ElTheEgg
@eltheegg It’s giving MAKEUP ARTIST! Don’t let your mind trick you into not doing things that were meant for you! I applied to Sephora Squad so lots more makeup looks coming!! #blackgirlmakeup #selfportrait #sephorasquad #avantgarde
The recent law school grad serves up comedy and charm in spades, turning everyday observations into hilarious moments. With her unique sense of humor and sharp wit, El creates content that’s both entertaining and endlessly relatable. Her playful personality and knack for storytelling make her videos a must-watch. She also created a list of her favorite Black creators in appreciation for Eni’s TikTok.
@MakaylaMashell
@makaylamashelle Replying to @ollyisfried contour placement to lift and snatch your face✨ - this is just where I place my cream contour and bronzer but the rest of my makeup really finishes everything 💕
Self-proclaimed girly girl Makayla Mashell is a versatile creator who showcases beauty in her engaging content. Her storytelling skills and warm personality make every video feel like a conversation with a close friend. From relatable anecdotes to stunning beauty tips, Makayla keeps her audience entertained and inspired. Need to know more about big hair or contour placement? Makayla has got you covered.
@RuesWorldd
@ruesworldd Oh just a girl and her camera// jacket from @SUPA888 #fyp #foryou
Rue's TikTok account is a must-follow for fashion enthusiasts. Her unique ability to blend classic and contemporary styles, along with her engaging presentation and knowledge of fashion history, sets her apart in the crowded fashion space. She offers a refreshing take on fashion trends, providing inspiration and styling tips while showcasing her impeccable taste and creative flair. Her content is not only visually appealing but also informative and entertaining, making her a true fashion innovator and a valuable resource for anyone seeking to elevate their style.
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Featured image via Jaz Turner/Instagram
Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
From Misdiagnosis To Multiple Surgeries: The Hidden Reality Of Fibroids Among Black Women
If someone had told me I’d be working toward my third fibroid surgery in less than six years, I would have had a hard time believing them. First, because obviously, no one wants to ever hear the word "surgery" (unless it’s cosmetic surgery you’re opting for). But the more significant reason is I’d never heard any of the women in my life talk about fibroids, so the idea of having all of the complex issues because of them, on top of surgeries, was truly a foreign concept.
After my doctor told me I’d need a second surgery in March of 2023—a hysteroscopic myomectomy—after bleeding every day for over six months, I was over it. Not just over the symptoms. But I was done feeling siloed on an island dealing with the pain, feeling tired all the time, and the heaviness of what felt like endless trips to the doctor for ultrasounds, blood transfusions, blood count checks, MRIs, etc.
I would try to explain what I was feeling, and my pain was written off because I guess period pain is just supposed to be normal. I’m here to tell you it is not. And because we’ve been conditioned to just deal, that’s the way things should stay. Yeah, no.
What is a hysteroscopic myomectomy? Hysteroscopic myomectomy is the most minimally invasive procedure to treat fibroids. A surgeon removes fibroids by inserting a hysteroscope into the uterine cavity through the vagina and cervix.
So, I wrote and directed an animated short film to bring educational and entertainment value to helping the world learn about fibroids. With $25,000 of my own money, I went forth and made the film titled Super High: A Period Piece. Now, it’s making its rounds on the festival circuit, even gaining entry into two Oscar-qualifying festivals: the Chicago International Film Festival and the New Orleans Film Festival. We even won Best Narrative Short at the Morehouse Human Rights Film Festival in Atlanta.
As I was venturing onto the festival circuit, my editor asked me to write a piece highlighting the experiences of Black women with fibroids. Initially, I planned to highlight up to 15 stories. However, as I started working on this story, I thought hearing the experiences more in-depth would be equally impactful. So, we chatted with four women about their fibroid journeys.
The one thing we all had in common, which made me sad but also made me feel seen, was that none of us knew much about them beforehand. However, our willingness to openly share our stories will hopefully change that for many women now and beyond.
Keep reading for four women’s stories about their journey with fibroids.
Rosco Spears, artist and creative director
Before your journey with fibroids, did you know much about them?
Before my journey with fibroids, I didn't know much about them. I'd never heard of fibroids until women around me started getting diagnosed. I was dealing with heavy, painful periods long before I was privy to any of these diagnoses.
Shortly before I was officially diagnosed with having fibroids (2012), I learned that my sister and other women in my family also had fibroids. As I've grown older, I've learned that my three sisters, many cousins, aunts, etc, have also had fibroids. It's simply an issue that was never discussed.
How did you find out you had fibroids?
I found out that I had fibroids while living in NYC. I was fed up with the pain and discomfort from my period, so I shopped around until I got an answer that I thought made sense. I met a wonderful woman doctor who finally diagnosed me, and she offered me several options for easing the discomfort. During this time, I would often bleed between periods.
In 2013, one of my "in-between" moments was more than the spotting that I was used to, so I took myself to the emergency [room]. I learned that my hemoglobin [levels] were at seven, and the doctors wouldn't let me leave the hospital without getting a blood transfusion. They also highly recommended that I get surgery to remove the fibroids. Once I officially got the diagnosis, it was scary, but it also felt amazing to know that I could begin planning a path forward.
What are hemoglobin levels? To ensure adequate tissue oxygenation—a very important complex dance between the lungs, blood, and cardiovascular system—a sufficient hemoglobin level has to be maintained. The normal Hb level for women is 12 to 16 g/dl. Low hemoglobin levels mean your body isn’t getting enough oxygen, which is why you feel very tired and weak.
If you're comfortable, we'd love to hear about your treatment. Did things go as planned? Were you nervous about what your doctor suggested?
I've had two abdominal myomectomies, one in 2013 (16 fibroids were removed) and another in 2020 (51 fibroids were removed). I was nervous about the idea of being cut open during the myomectomy, but I didn't think that the outcome could be any worse than the pain that I was already dealing with. Both surgeries went just as planned (aside from the 2nd surgery being rescheduled due to COVID-19), and my recovery from both was amazing.
In 2013, I was a bit unhinged. I went location scouting for a photo shoot for The Lip Bar three days after I got home from the hospital. My family was very upset, but I honestly felt fine. I had some abdominal pain, but within two weeks, I was back in the studio on my feet all day. After my second surgery, the plan was to try and have a child shortly after recovery. I took my time with healing and did things according to the book.
What is a myomectomy? A myomectomy is surgery to remove uterine fibroids. There are several types of myomectomies, but the procedure you and your doctor decide is right for you will depend on factors like location, number, and size of your fibroids.
How did you feel post-treatment? How has getting treatment changed your quality of life?
I felt/feel amazing post-treatment! For about 2-3 years after both surgeries, my periods were much lighter, and the pain was light [and] much more bearable than it was with the fibroids. My quality of life is much different post-surgery.
There have been years [when] I simply did not have any energy while I was on my period. The most I could do was get up to go to the bathroom and get right back in bed. Or I'd have to carry a change of clothes with me when traveling to work because I couldn't afford to take off during my period, but I knew that at some point, I would bleed through everything. So, in that regard, life is beautiful. I'm no longer passing out, nor do I feel the need to bring an extra set of pants along on the ride.
While my quality of life has improved tremendously, I often joke and say that I have PTSD from having bad periods. What I mean is that I still check my pants often when I'm on my period. And I still get anxiety if I'm in public and I'm on day two or three of my period because who knows if it is just a little blood that I feel coming down or it's a huge clot that's going to ruin my pants. And I still know better than to try and wash my hair on my heavy days because there isn't enough energy to do both.
For someone just starting their fibroid journey, what are two pieces of advice you'd give them?
You got this, sis! It's a difficult journey, but please seek advice from other women on the journey. If one doctor is not giving you sufficient information, find a new doctor. Make sure you're exploring all of the options for fibroid removal/shrinking treatments [because] it is not one size fits all. And take your iron supplements, boo.
How important do you think it is for us to share our fibroid stories with each other and talk about this openly?
Oh God, if I could pay women to share their fibroid stories, I would. It's imperative that we talk with one another about our experiences in health. I shared my fibroid story years ago because I was so lost when I was on my journey. One of my sisters had the surgery before I did, but other than her, I didn't have anyone to talk to about fibroids.
I felt very alone, isolated, and somewhat embarrassed because it felt like this wasn't happening to anyone else around me. It makes a world of difference when you can talk with someone about an issue they are also facing. We will learn a lot more by discussing shared experiences—much of which you cannot learn from talking to your doctor or Google.
La-Anna Douglas, women’s advocate and motivational speaker
Before your journey with fibroids, did you know much about them?
Being someone who started my period at the age of 10, I was in the dark when it pertained to fibroids and other reproductive health issues. I had never heard of fibroids, and I didn’t know that the pain I was experiencing, along with fertility delays, was because of the fibroids sitting in between my two uteruses. The pelvic pain, excruciating periods, fatigue, and protruding belly to someone else would have been a dead giveaway. But I had no idea what was going on with my body. I also did not know of anyone in my family dealing with fibroids.
How did you find out you had fibroids?
I was diagnosed with fibroids by a reproductive endocrinologist [and] was finally properly diagnosed after suffering for 16 years. I finally found a doctor willing to listen to my concerns and, most of all, believed that I wasn’t making it up. She scheduled me for a thorough examination, and I was soon scheduled for laparoscopic surgery. I was diagnosed with three fibroids, endometriosis, and a uterus didelphys (two uteruses and two cervixes).
Uterus didelphys is a rare congenital condition where you're born with two uteruses. It's commonly called a double uterus.
Again, I was misdiagnosed for years, and my pain was minimized. I was labeled as the girl with bad periods. I would have cramps for 3-4 days on my left side of my belly and then cramps for 3-4 days on my right. In actuality, I was having two periods from two different uteruses with three fibroids pressing on my wombs with endometriosis wrapped around my fallopian tubes and my uterus. When I heard all of the different diagnoses, I was angry, overwhelmed, scared, and confused. But the worst thing is that I was unprepared mentally and emotionally for the diagnosis and the journey ahead.
"I was misdiagnosed for years, and my pain was minimized. I was labeled as the girl with bad periods. In actuality, I was having two periods from two different uteruses with three fibroids pressing on my wombs with endometriosis wrapped around my fallopian tubes and my uterus."
If you're comfortable, we'd love to hear about your treatment. Did things go as planned? Were you nervous about what your doctor suggested?
I was told not to worry about removing the fibroids surgically after being diagnosed in my 20s back in 2008. But in 2020, during the pandemic, my pain started to escalate again. So, I was scheduled for an ultrasound, an MRI, and then a double-balloon procedure. I was told that my fibroids had grown and they were contributing to the secondary infertility I was experiencing. My doctor gave me two options. Would I rather have a hysterectomy?
I had already gone through 30 years of horrible periods, eight years of infertility [and] finally having a miracle baby in 2013 by God’s grace, and I had already gone through multiple procedures. Or I could do the robotic laparoscopic myomectomy, where they would remove the fibroids and open my two cervixes by also doing a hysteroscopy. At first, [I] wanted to do a hysterectomy, but [after] talking to my family and praying about it, I decided on having the robotic laparoscopic myomectomy. I was a little nervous but knew I was in good hands.
What is a laparoscopic myomectomy? A laparoscopic myomectomy is a minimally invasive procedure to remove uterine fibroids. A surgeon makes four tiny incisions in your abdomen and then uses a laparoscope, which is a special instrument that contains a light and video camera, to operate through the incisions.
How did you feel post-treatment? How has getting treatment changed your quality of life?
Post-treatment, I felt relieved and grateful. The healing journey was okay. I had a lot of support from my family, especially my husband. After the healing, [I am] loving on my body because the many scars on my belly are my beauty marks. I started to get more confident in who I was. The doctor who did the robotic laparoscopic myomectomy believed that I would get pregnant again.
Well, six months after the surgery, I became pregnant with our second miracle baby girl after eight years of secondary infertility at the age of 40. And to think, [had] I decided on the hysterectomy, she would not be here. Our surprise baby has brought so much happiness to our family.
For someone just starting their fibroid journey, what are two pieces of advice you'd give them?
For anyone just beginning their fibroid journey, my advice would be to advocate for yourself no matter what the diagnosis may be. Your voice matters, and you control your narrative. If the doctor is not listening to you or your concerns, you have every right to seek a second, third, fourth, or as many opinions as you wish until you are heard and properly cared for. KNOW YOUR WORTH!
[And,] to always love on yourself through the journey with fibroids and anything else you may be going through. YOU ARE ENOUGH. The physical scars and the invisible scars are your beauty marks. And share with others how you are feeling and what you are going through. Please do not suffer in silence!
How important do you think it is for us to share our fibroid stories with each other and talk about this openly?
It is so important that we share our journey with fibroids because there is power in supportive stories. We all must realize that we are not alone. There are so many of us who have similar situations going on or may be feeling the same feelings you may be feeling.
Sharing your story also helps to heal those hurts that happen on the road to diagnosis. Healing taps into the strength that has been lying dormant inside of us, and when that strength is ignited, there is nothing that can stop you from advocating for yourself and others who begin to share their stories with you.
Dawn Heels, award-winning fibroid advocate and campaigner
Before your journey with fibroids, did you know much about them?
I knew absolutely nothing about fibroids apart from the fact that my mum had one (she found out when she was pregnant with me), but even with this information, she didn't know anything about them.
How did you find out you had fibroids?
I had always suffered [from] extremely heavy, painful periods. I thought [this] was normal, [so] I didn't link it to the fact that something could be wrong with me. I first discovered I had fibroids after experiencing constant pain in the left-hand side of my abdomen in 2016. During an ultrasound scan, I was told I had 2 x 4 cm fibroids by the sonographer.
Two types of ultrasound scan can be used to help diagnose fibroids: an abdominal ultrasound scan – where the ultrasound probe is moved over the outside of your tummy (abdomen) a transvaginal ultrasound scan – where a small ultrasound probe is inserted into your vagina.
I hadn’t a clue what they were, and when I went back to see my doctor, he told me that I had nothing to worry about because fibroids were common, normal, and I should deal with any pain with a hot water bottle and ibuprofen. And because he told me I had nothing to worry about, at that moment, I didn’t worry.
If you're comfortable, we'd love to hear about your treatment. Did things go as planned? Were you nervous about what your doctor suggested?
Over the next six years, my pain and suffering got worse. I displayed horrendous fibroid symptoms: bum cheek pain, leg pain, painful, heavy, clotty periods, lower back pain, extreme pain, abdominal/pelvic pain, early pregnancy symptoms, tiredness, ‘preggo belly,’ painful sex, long periods and was infertile. I finally saw a consultant who changed my life, as he was the first person to listen to me and put a plan in place.
"He transvaginally scanned me and told me I actually had at least six fibroids, the biggest being the size of a grapefruit, and with that, I would have to have an open myomectomy."
He transvaginally scanned me and told me I actually had at least six fibroids, the biggest being the size of a grapefruit, and with that, I would have to have an open myomectomy. I cried so many tears because I thought if I was to ever have an operation that resembled the C-section, I would be giving birth to a baby, not tumors! The operation was a success, and he removed 16 fibroids and left 2 in to give me a chance at conceiving. I lost a lot of blood and had an emergency blood transfusion one week later.
After eight weeks of healing, I started to feel much better.
How did you feel post-treatment? How has getting treatment changed your quality of life?
The open myomectomy gave me my life back—a good quality of life. I wasn’t in pain anymore. My periods were shorter and significantly lighter, and best of all, I fell pregnant six months after surgery!
What is an open myomectomy? An abdominal, or open, myomectomy removes fibroids through an incision in the abdomen, typically on the bikini line. The recovery time generally lasts up to six weeks.
For someone just starting their fibroid journey, what are two pieces of advice you'd give them?
Educate yourself on the condition so you can guide the conversation and ask relevant questions when going into your consultations. Advocate for yourself, too! Too many of us will just agree to all sorts of nonsense just because the medical professional says so! You are the expert over your own body, so speak up!
How important do you think it is for us to share our fibroid stories with each other and talk about this openly?
I became an ‘accidental’ advocate because I shared my story. My inbox was inundated with messages from other ladies who had suffered or were currently suffering. That’s how powerful a share is.
Camille Austin, model and content creator
Before your journey with fibroids, did you know much about them? For example, did you know what symptoms to look out for?
I did not know much, if not anything at all. So, I did not know what symptoms to look out for.
Did you know if anyone in your family had ever dealt with them?
Yes, my mother, but she was already going through menopause, so our symptoms did not seem comparable.
How did you find out you had fibroids?
[I went] to my primary care physician, who is also a WOC. She performed a pelvic exam, and when I told her about all of my symptoms, she thought it was fibroids. It took a while and [was] frankly [an] annoying process to finally get to an MRI where they found three fibroids, one the size of 15cm.
And how did you feel once you got the official diagnosis?
I felt relieved and scared—scared about what this meant about my fertility. [But,] relieved that I had answers and I was going to get better.
If you're comfortable, we'd love to hear about your treatment. Did things go as planned? Were you nervous about what your doctor suggested?
I had to have surgery due to the size [of my fibroid.] I had an open and laparoscopic procedure done and was on the table for eight hours. I did not initially trust my surgeon as she wanted to jump straight into a hysterectomy. Common practice says that the only way to stop them from ever coming back is through a hysterectomy, which I find to be a bit extreme. To me, it sounds like it's just under-researched, and not enough efforts are being made because this largely impacts WOC, but I digress.
"My surgeon thought because I'm so young, healthy, and strong, she did not put me on a hospital list, which gives another doctor the ability to treat me overnight should something happen. Well, something happened."
My surgeon thought because I'm so young, healthy, and strong, she did not put me on a hospital list, which gives another doctor the ability to treat me overnight should something happen. Well, something happened. I found out I'm allergic to Dilaudid (a common pain med). I broke out and had a third-degree chemical burn around my stomach from the adhesive, and my skin completely broke out. There was not a doctor available to give me even so much as a Benadryl to ease the discomfort. Nurses can't prescribe meds.
It wasn't until I threatened to leave the hospital—I got up and packed my bags—that I received a pink Benadryl pill after waiting for about 6 hours. About a week after I got home, I broke into a fever and was septic. I was rushed back to the hospital and had to spend an additional four days. In short, the healing process did not go according to plan.
After your difficult hospital experience and healing journey, how did you feel post-treatment? How has getting treatment changed your quality of life?
After treatment, I felt so much better after everything was said and done. I would still get the surgery if I had to do it again. When I eventually healed, my periods were shorter. I could fit my clothes again, and I just had more energy to do things since I was not as anemic.
For someone just starting their fibroid journey, what are two pieces of advice you'd give them?
[First,] push for that MRI sooner than later. If you catch them when they are small, you can look into non-invasive ways to get rid of them.
Make sure your doctor has a hospital list, and ask who will be in charge of taking care of you when your doctor is not around.
What does an MRI mean for fibroids? An MRI uses a magnetic field and radio waves to create computerized, 3D images of the uterus. These images can help your doctor decide which treatment is best for you and rule out other issues like adenomyosis and endometriosis.
How important do you think it is for us to share our fibroid stories with each other and talk about this openly?
I think it's important because we can all learn from each other, and this is not just becoming a "woman over 30" problem. According to my doctors, I was far too young, and due to my age, this was something that went unnoticed. Frankly, it should not have been a far stretch because I have fibroids in my breast tissue as well, but somehow, no correlation has been made.
So we have to press the issue, so hopefully, we can look into why this is happening to so many women and not allow a hysterectomy to be the first response.
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Featured image by Shutterstock
Originally published on October, 2, 2024