![Quantcast](http://pixel.quantserve.com/pixel/p-GS-HF4BKvzCmv.gif)
![How To Support Someone Who's Suffered From A Miscarriage](https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjg5NDcxMS9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTc0NTA1NjA0NX0.f6RsoDh054fF8QjsCUeyJE5e7Yrr8jryBTAP0-aHtPA/img.jpg?width=1200&height=600&quality=90&coordinates=0%2C47%2C0%2C120)
How To Support Someone Who's Suffered From A Miscarriage
Is it just me or does it seem like infertility is a much more common struggle?
I don't know if it's because we're getting older and realize it more, or if it's truly something that more women are going through way too regularly. I'm at the age where many of my closest friends have attempted to grow their families only to suffer losing an unborn child. It's heartbreaking for me so I can't even fathom how devastating it is for them.
While it seems impossible for me to be there for them because there's no way I can understand, it's not completely out of the question. It's really just about knowing your friend and what she needs from you, if anything.
Here's a few things you can do for your friend to support her after experiencing a miscarriage:
Pray For Her.
Pray with her, when she's not around, and especially when she doesn't ask you to; because in some cases, she won't. Depending on when she shares this news with you, prayer could be the furthest thing from her mind as her pain and devastation take over. That's where your strength comes in to help her out.
Whether it's over the phone, in person, or even through text messages, don't just be a person who says, "Oh girl, I'm praying for you." I think it means more when you actually do it consistently and constantly. She might not tell you she needs it, but there will definitely be indescribably tough moments when your prayers will help her through.
Give Her Hope.
I remember when a girl I didn't know that well told me she and her husband suffered a miscarriage around the time her father-in-law passed away. Talk about unspeakable heartbreak and devastation. I then shared that some of my really close friends had lost their unborn child but now have amazingly healthy and beautiful children.
It was really an encouragement for her to hear that just because she had a miscarriage, didn't mean that she shouldn't have hope to be a mother one day. Now I can add her to that list of my friends who have children because she and husband now have the most adorable baby girl. No matter what it looks like for your friend, give her constant encouragement that there's hope for her too.
Just Listen.
I know I said to pray for her and give her hope, which are both really important factors. But there are also times when she just needs you to listen.
There's a time for prayer and encouragement, but there's also a time when you have to be the silent version of yourself and listen to her heart. When she's finished, that might not necessarily be an invitation for you to share your piece, thoughts, and opinions. Instead, just let her know that you love her, that you're here for her whenever she needs you, and give her a hug. It's not the solution to everything, but it will certainly help.
Be Supportive In the Way She Needs.
While it's so easy to try and give other options of how your friend can become a mother in hopes of healing her pain, that might not be the best idea based on the type of person she is. Yes, the ideas of adoption and having a surrogate are very possible ways she can live out her dream to be a mom, but that doesn't take away from the fact that her world has been crushed as she lost her child that she developed an unspeakable bond with.
While those options are possibilities, they might not seem the same to her. At least not in the moment. But if she does choose to go that route, you can be the best friend in the world by supporting her decision to the fullest if or when she finally decides.
Realize You Can’t Fix It.
When you have a best friend experiencing something negative, it's only natural to jump into "that's my best friend" mode and want to fix it. Unfortunately, this isn't the same as some girl coming for her on social media. In this situation, there's absolutely nothing we can do to fix it, and sometimes that's the worst thing about it.
There's no need to say, "Oh girl I wish there was something I can do," because it just brings light to the fact that you really can't be there for her in the way you want. Instead, just being a listening ear for her. Letting her know you've got her back might be the best solution.
Ask Her What She Needs.
Sometimes, as much as we know our friend, we have no idea what they need in the moment. Sometimes, even she won't know what she needs. But when you ask, you're at least letting her know that whatever it is, you got her.
It might be something as simple as taking her children for the day or covering for her shift at work if she needs alone time. I think as long as you're ready to do a huge favor, or even no favor at all, asking her what you can do for her is just one of the ways you can help your friend after her loss.
Indulge Her.
Whether it's taking her out for a girls' night or staying in with a Netflix binge and ice cream, do something special for her. It might not take her mind off of it, but she will know that she's surrounded by an amazing support system. It will confirm to her that you really are that ride or die friend she's known you to be all along.
While she might look back at her loss and difficult time and feel sad all over again, it's very possible that she'll also remember you were there for her when she needed you the most.
Featured image by Shutterstock
- 10 Nice Things to do for a Friend After a Miscarriage ›
- How to Support Someone After a Miscarriage | Focus on the Family ›
- Supporting someone who has had a miscarriage | Tommy's ›
- How to Support a Friend Going Through Miscarriage: 14 Steps ›
- Helping Someone After a Miscarriage – Miscarriage Support NZ ›
- How To Be A Friend To Someone Who Has Had A Miscarriage ›
- How to help someone after a miscarriage or loss – expert reveals ... ›
- How to help a friend through a miscarriage - INSIDER ›
- 5 Ways To Support A Friend After Miscarriage | HuffPost Life ›
- After a Miscarriage: Supporting Friends & Family Through Loss ›
Charmaine Patterson is a journalist, lifestyle blogger, and a lover of all things pop culture. While she has much experience in covering top entertainment news stories, she aims to share her everyday life experiences, old and new, with other women who can relate, laugh, and love along with her. Follow Char on Twitter @charjpatterson, Instagram @charpatterson, and keep up with her journey at CharJPatterson.com .
How This New Bond Repair Line Transformed One Mother's Postpartum Shedding Into The Ultimate Curl Comeback
This article is in partnership with SheaMoisture
For Crystal Obasanya, her wash day woes came shortly after her son did. The beauty and lifestyle content creator had been natural for years, but during postpartum, she quickly learned about one reality many mothers can relate to experiencing: postpartum hair loss. “Sis had thinning hair. Sis had split ends,” she shared about her hair changes in a Reel via xoNecole.
Over a year into her postpartum journey, Crystal explained she also had dry, brittle hair, noting that keeping it hydrated before pregnancy had already been “a task.” The 4C natural recalled going from thick hair during pregnancy to a thin hairline due to postpartum shedding as “devastating.” When it came to strengthening and revitalizing her hair, the new SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection was just the thing she needed to elevate her damaged coils to revive and thrive status and get them poppin' again.
SheaMoisture is providing us with the cheat code for transforming dry and damaged strands into thriving and deeply nourished crowns. By unveiling their 4-step hair system, the SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection is equipping you with the tools to reverse signs of hair damage caused by protective styling, heat, and color and is uniquely formulated for Type 3 and 4 hair textures.
The haircare system revives damaged natural hair by repairing and rebuilding broken hair bonds through a game-changing combination of HydroPlex Technology and AminoBlend Complex, a unique blend of fortifying amino acids formulated specifically for curly and coily hair. Scientifically proven to reduce breakage by 84% and make your hair six times stronger (vs. non-conditioning shampoo), the collection infuses your hair with the nourishment it craves and the strength it deserves.
All five products of the SheaMoisture Bond Collection are infused with natural strengthening ingredients like Amla Oil and fair-trade shea butter. The collection consists of the 4-step breakage-fighting Bond Repair system, as well as the Bonding Oil.
“When trying it out, I quickly noticed that my hair felt revived and renewed, and my curls were so hydrated,” Crystal said while using the Amla-infused Bond Repair Leave-In Conditioner. “I also felt my hair strands were stronger.” So much so that the influencer felt brave enough to get her hair braided shortly thereafter. “I can definitely say that I will be keeping it in my hair wash routine,” she added in the caption of her Reel about her positive experience using the products.
SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection is making bond-building a key player in your wash day routines and the purveyor of life for thirsty manes. Because who doesn't want stronger, shinier, happier hair?
Step One: Bond Repair Collection Shampoo
Rejuvenate your hair with SheaMoisture Bond Repair Shampoo, your go-to solution for luscious locks. Packed with hella hydration power, this shampoo adds moisture by 60% while removing buildup without stripping your strands. This shampoo gently cleanses impurities while significantly enhancing shine, smoothness, and softness.
The Bond Repair Collection Shampoo is the first step in the 4-step Bond Repair system, all of which are powered by the uniquely formulated AminoBlend, and HydroPlex, SheaMoisture’s technology that rebuilds hair strength at its core.
Step Two: Bond Repair Collection Conditioner
Tailored to repair styling damage, this creamy conditioner locks in 12x more moisture than standard non-conditioning shampoos, boosting damaged hair strength by 1.5x with significantly less breakage. The creamy SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection Conditioner deeply hydrates, enhances manageability, and leaves your hair looking healthier and shinier.
Step Three: Bond Repair Collection Masque
This Ultra Moisturizing reparative masque is a moisture-rich game-changer for those dealing with the aftermath of hair damage caused by styling. The SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection Masque delivers 13 times more moisture compared to non-conditioning shampoos, ensuring your hair feels nourished and soft. Designed to repair and rejuvenate, this masque significantly strengthens damaged hair — making it twice as strong while reducing breakage.
Step Four: Bond Repair Collection Leave-In Conditioner
Elevate your curl game with SheaMoisture’s Bond Repair Collection Leave-In Conditioner. Lightweight and hydrating, the Bond Repair Leave-In Conditioner provides 12x more moisture than non-conditioning shampoos and tames frizz with 24-hour humidity control. Designed to define curls and coils, the leave-in conditioner enhances softness and shine allowing you to detangle effortlessly.
Bonding Oil
The SheaMoisture Bond Repair Collection Bonding Oil is a multitasking all-in-one formula that acts as a heat protectant and provides the hair with moisture, strength, shine, damage protection, and intense nourishment. This lightweight oil not only offers 24-hour frizz and humidity control but also fortifies your tresses, making them up to 5 times stronger with significantly less breakage.
Featured image courtesy
Rapper Latto is keeping it real about the Brazilian butt-lift surgery she received at just 21 years old.
The “Big Energy” performer took to a livestream to reflect on her physical transformation over the years. She shared that after signing her first deal at the age of 21, her lifestyle changed significantly, causing her to indulge in her favorite foods which resulted in some weight gain.
“My body was so tea. I gained a little weight, 'cause I signed my deal when I was 21, when I had just turned 21. And I was just having money and living a whole new life, eating out," she told fans. "Y'all know I’m a foodie, so now I had the funds to feed this foodie in me and stuff, so I gained a little weight.”
However, harsh comments from people on the internet significantly impacted her self-esteem. “Everybody on the internet was calling me ‘bad-bodied’ and stuff, so I feel like that played a role. I started being a little insecure about my body,” she recalls.
The 25-year-old went on to address the persistent scrutiny and pressure she faced from the public regarding her appearance. despite her transparency around the procedure. "Every time I post a gym picture, people be like, ‘Oh, she got a BBL.’ I’ve been so loud and clear about a BBL that I had four years ago,” she stated. “When I was 21, [the BBL] that y’all convinced me I needed, by the way," she said.
During a 2023 episode of her Apple Music show, 777, Latto chatted with her sister, Brooklyn Nikole about her experiences with body image and surgery, opening up about the relentless criticism she faced. "When I didn’t have my surgery, they’re like, ‘Oh, she shaped like her white side’ … And then when I got the surgery, it is, ‘Oh, she’s botched. Oh, it’s too heavy.’"
The constant judgment she encountered led her to a significant realization. "I’m telling you from someone who’s been there, done it, find peace within your natural state. Because you’re going to find a flaw and another flaw and another flaw and another flaw."
Latto’s candid reflections offer a compelling reminder that true beauty lies in self-acceptance and inner peace. In a world where societal beauty standards are constantly shifting, her message is a call to prioritize personal happiness and authenticity over external validation.
"Moral of the story: I just think everybody should just stop worrying about everybody. Natural girls are winning. Surgery girls…BBL girls are winning," she shares. "Do what works for you and mind your own business. Make your own decisions based on what you want to do, not what other people are telling you to do."
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Raimonda Kulikauskiene/Getty Images