Many of us left a lot behind in 2021, but we have one last thing we need to leave behind: that job. Maybe you've outgrown it, just need a change, don't like it at all, or need to switch to something that aligns with your personal growth. At the start of a new year, it's important to put things in perspective so that you can set goals for your career journey and really kick your fulfillment up a notch.
Start with these four steps to jumpstart the boss moves you'd like to make to create the career you love and can be proud of:
1. Assess, assess, and assess some more.
It's always good to start with your why, so you'll have to ask yourself some soul-searching questions. What's the end goal?What factors are at play when I think about changes in my career? How will a professional shift affect my life and loved ones? What do I really want out of my career? What makes me happy? What am I actually good at? What are the things I could improve on?
For the last few questions, experts recommend taking an assessment. The CliftonStrengths or Optimal Thinking's Leadership Assessment are two great places to start because they focus on what you're great at based on your answers to select questions and they also offer great ways to improve on skills or abilities that you might be a tad weak in.
There are also simple tests you can take to brush up on the skills applicable to your industry or the type of job you want, so be sure to take a few.
(For example, if you already work in the tech industry but want to shift from IT to coding, find out what it takes to be great at that by taking mock tests used by employers to choose candidates. For online editing and writing, there are online tests for APress style aptitude or writing tests like these.)
Once you determine your why, understand a sense of your strengths, and acknowledge a few things you could improve on, you're better able to create a plan of action for your next move.
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2. Socialize and get educated.
If you're at a space in your career where you're stuck or you're unsure of what really makes your heart sing anymore, a great way to get inspiration is to connect with others who either feel the same or might be doing something you're interested in getting into. Join an organization, get into a Facebook group, or start your own activity that will not only gather people together but lead to authentic conversations and support. Start attending those virtual events or in-person conferences, and don't be afraid to invite someone to a virtual or in-person coffee or lunch date.
Another great way to connect with others and gain inspiration is by becoming a student again. If you don't want to invest in a whole bachelor's or master's program, start with a short course, even if it's online-only. Once you're engrossed in a subject matter, you'll soon learn what you want-—or definitely don't—want to do, and you can, again connect with classmates, teachers and professors who will inspire you and lead you to your next steps.
3. Test your passions and dedication with an internship, volunteer opp, or fellowship.
Leaders are always empowered and inspired by challenge, so you'll want to put yourself to the test by actually doing the work. Sign up for those projects that are outside your current department, build out a new initiative that you can be proud of, or try an internship or fellowship where you can really show what you've got.
Volunteer opportunities are also a great way to test the waters of new passions or career changes, and you can actually put these on your resume in order to attract new paying clients, gigs, or opportunities. Plus, the good thing about these is that though you've spent time, there isn't much lost if you're not so great, don't really like the duties, or just fail. Volunteering also doesn't just have to be with an organization. It could be with a small business or successful leader you admire who you learn more from and build a connection for a reference.
Remain open-minded about this one, be sure that there's a good return of your time and energy investment, and allow the experience to facilitate alignment with your long-term career goals.
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4. Actually apply for those opportunities, even those that seem like a long shot.
This is a big one. If you really want to advance, boost your earning potential, or walk among the big bosses of your industry, you have to position yourself for greatness. Putting in that application, that contract bid, or pitching yourself or your business for those huge opportunities is the best way to do this. Don't talk yourself out of success especially once you see the brands connected, the number of applicants, or the caliber of your competition. And don't let a naysayer in the form of a coworker, "mentor" or toxic boss keep you from pushing for better. Allow the magnitude of the opportunity to be the kick in the butt you needed to step up your efforts and go for yours. (And even if you're not prepared this year, start today to prep to be ready for next year. If you need more training, need to work your way up to a certain position in order to qualify or need to get a coach to brush on skills, do that now, but don't just disregard a seemingly unrealistic opportunity due to something like not being confident or prepared enough).
Plus, even in rejection there are lessons, and you can request feedback or learn from those who might have succeeded at getting the opportunity. Hey, you won't know if you never threw your name in the hat.
Taking on the journey of career fulfillment and advancement takes guts, bold moves, and fortitude to survive the pains of failure or flubs. At least you have these steps to sustain you and get you started to seeing a great 2022 both professionally and personally.
Featured image by F.J. Jimenez/Getty Images
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The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:Â Â
​Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
​Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
​Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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