
An Intimate Conversation With David Banner On The State Of Black Love & Marriage

David Banner is not worried about being politically correct, and when he speaks, he does so with conviction.
He's something like a preacher who knows that you'll leave his sermon sanctified and filled with the Holy Ghost—except Banner isn't focused on saving souls, he's interested in saving your mind from the constraints that society has placed upon us as Black women, Black men, and the Black race as a whole.
The David Banner that I spoke with on a Friday afternoon isn't much different than the Banner that I was introduced to years ago when his first hit single “Like A Pimp" hit the airwaves, and later the more thought-provoking “Cadillac on 22s." He's still unapologetically blunt, still speaking his mind, and still delivering messages that reflect all aspects of life—from sex and relationships to spirituality and racial disparity.
But he's definitely an evolved man. After all, if you're not growing, you're dying—and Banner is letting us know through glimpses into the next chapter of his life that his mission isn't fulfilled until his last exhale.
His latest single, “Marry Me," has been greeted with open arms by those tired of the same old “f-ck love" narrative of broken relationships, promiscuity, and empty intimacy that a seemingly loveless generation has brought to the forefront. It dispels the myth that Black men and marriage are mutually exclusive, and shifts the conversation from one of hopelessness and despair to one of progression and possibilities.
“This song is for [all] Black women, but it's especially for the dark-skinned black women," says Banner. “If you look at our culture, our women don't feel protected. They don't feel wanted. You look at most of who so-called people of success cater to—nine times out of 10 it may not be a Black woman at all. And if it is, it's definitely not ones that look like our cousins or our great-grandmothers. And I said man, if nobody in the world says that they love them and that they respect them and that they want them, it'll be me."
While the song may be geared towards women, there's a lesson in it for everybody in that in order to change our families and our communities we have to change the stories that we're telling, and change how we treat and speak to one another.
To get more insight into how David Banner is using his platform to shift the culture, we sat down with the Mississippi artist to discuss the idea of marriage and relationships in the Black community, rebranding himself as not just another artist contributing to the problem, and how he plans to be a part of the solution.
I listened to your “Marry Me" track when it first dropped and I really loved it. I was just talking to somebody about how we don't really have that kind of music that celebrates love and relationships like back in the day when we had The Isley Brothers, and when men and women were actually celebrating love and marriage. So how did the track come about, what made you want to do a song about marriage?
There were a couple things. One of the things that happened was 9th Wonder was actually producing, and the reason why I made the song because he asked me a question. He said that most of the rappers that really pushed the culture forward--and who are making a whole lot of money--are over the age of 35. But have you ever noticed they never talk about men's subjects?
One of the reasons why I let my beard grow out is because I wanted young men to see a successful Black man grow one. I wanted them to see the wisdom. Another thing is that this song is for Black women, but it's especially for dark-skinned black women.
"If you look at our culture, our women don't feel protected. They don't feel wanted."
You look at most of who so-called people of success cater to—nine times out of 10 it may not be a Black woman at all. And if it is, it's definitely not ones that look like our great grandmothers. And I said man, if nobody in the world says that they love them and that they respect them and that they want them, it'll be me.
And lastly, and the most important thing about this song, one of my friends told me, “David Banner, I know you want to save the world, I know you want to help Black people and the revolution and all of that, but in order for you to do any of those things, you have to mend the relationships with our families—with our women." He told me until I build the family back together, none of this will work. He said in slavery, our families were ripped apart and we never healed them. We always blame it on Black on Black, but before we were ever so-called “set free," we never mended our relationships with our family and with our women.
[Related Post: David Banner's New Track "Marry Me" Is Giving Us All the Feels]
That's actually a good point. I see a lot of people who are hurt and responding from places of pain, and we're not really getting to the root of the problem. We're so busy pointing fingers at the opposite sex. It's not only about healing the family, but healing ourselves personally.
There's no way that a man can raise a female child by himself and expect for her to be mentally functional. Just because a woman can raise a man that is successful in the United States doesn't mean that you properly raised a man. This is my personal opinion. We cannot make a proper child--a proper relationship--without a union of God, woman, and man. And what's sad about it is, they have degraded the role of a woman so much. We need balance, and that doesn't mean that the man is more important than woman or the woman more important than man, but we need both roles to properly raise anything.
It is very important for me to say that I've done enough degrading of our women myself. So, in no way is this downgrading any other rappers or saying what any other black man should do, this is for me. I have some making up to do. I have forgotten myself. With “Play," even though I really enjoyed it and I don't think there is anything wrong with that [song] in its proper place, there is no balance.
For "Marry Me" to even be looked at as the type of song that it is shows the problem—the fact that it's so special. "Marry Me" shouldn't be special. There should be a million songs like that. And the fact that it is so special and that women are crying all over the world because of this record, shows that it's a problem, and shows that there is no balance.
And honestly love, that is the reason why I made "Marry Me." And it's so funny, all of these people sit back and criticize men and rap music and all of this different stuff, now you have it, now you have the "Marry Me" song, now you have the strong black man who don't take no shit singing the type of songs that you were talking about, but let's see if we're going to get that story. Let's see if you're going talk about that as bad as you talk about black men.
"As bad as you criticize black men, are you now going to hold the ones up who are doing what you say we don't do?"
Are we going to go as hard for "Marry Me" the song as we do when we criticize black men and women in general? People always talk about what black men are not doing, but when we do it, it's just like, we even had somebody to say is it even going to even matter? These are the types of things that we're going to have to analyze.
You've talked on a variety of topics in your songs over the years, including love and relationships, but everyone likes to touch back to your song "Play." Can you speak to the process of your rebranding and what initiated that?
First of all, and people laugh when I tell them this, “Play" was actually a very powerful song, I just didn't articulate what I meant by it well enough. If you listen to “Play" it was a song where the man was telling the woman I want you to be happy. I want you to get yours, this is about you. What do you want me to do? Do you want me to touch you? This is strictly for you.
When [Mr.] Collipark gave me the concept of it, he was like Banner don't scream because you're so aggressive. He told me to say the stuff that women really want to hear. I have a song on my new album that's called “Cleopatra Jones," and it talks about a very conscious, smart woman who still loves to get her freak on, and there's nothing wrong with that. I had so many women that said they love “Play" but they don't listen to it [out]loud; it's sort of like a guilty pleasure.
I think part of it is in the Black community anything very sexual gets a lot of backlash from people.
And these are the same folks that'll be going to the bathroom at their jobs getting it on.
Right, and I think, when I heard “Play," I wasn't offended. I was younger so maybe that was part of it, but I'm looking at the lyrics now and you really don't degrade a woman in terms of calling them out their name or anything; it's really just more of a sexual song. Maybe if it was in the context of marriage it would've came off different, but even then…
That's not what I wanted to say. That's not the reality of where we live and what we're doing right now. We have to research. One of the other things that happened to American society in the late 1800's, they became enthralled with romance novels and we got into romanticism, and romanticism is not real. You're not going to meet Fabio. He's not going to be on top of the mountain and you're not going to be on the mountain climbing and bump into Fabio. That shit is not realistic. As a matter of fact, it's one of the reasons why we have so many divorces and have so many problems in relationships, it's because we're not real. We try to be romantic, and that's not real life.
I'm not saying that your man shouldn't be kind to you, that's not saying that your woman should not do things for you, but most of the stuff that we want from people, you never got that in real life anyway. And if you did get it, you got from some motherfucker who barely had money, don't work everyday or he a gigolo or that's what he do for a living is to run women, most men or women don't have time for that shit. And it doesn't exist.
One of your tweets a few months ago was that "if you want a man that respects the way you think then show more mind than ass," and a lot of people kind of went off about that. I find that, especially in this day and age, it's just really hard to get certain messages across. Do you think that's part of what's prohibiting positive and loving relationships amongst Black men and women?
That situation that you are talking about was one of the most confusing things that has ever happened to me in my life. The thing is, when a woman tells me about how a woman looks at a black man, I listen whether I agree or not. I'm telling you how a man thinks, and you're going to tell me something? That's like me commenting on pregnancy. I'm never going to comment, for the most part, on what a woman should do with her private parts or pregnancy, because I don't know anything about that! So, when I made that comment, I made that comment to heal and to help. If you don't agree with it then keep it moving.
[Related Post: David Banner: "Show A Man Your Mind More Than Your Ass If You Want Him To Respect You"]
The thing is, if we don't have real conversations with each other we're never going to heal. What's funny about it is, I actually learned about that from a scientific standpoint. If a man sees flesh and ass, he can't see anyway because his dick's hard. And when his dick gets hard, the blood rushes from his feet and from his head. So we can't walk and we can't see. Even from a scientific standpoint, when we see ass and titties we can't see!
"If we don't have real conversations with each other we're never going to heal."
We want stuff to make us feel good.And what happened that was good—guess who came to my rescue? Black women. When I went and read those threads, one Black woman shut the whole Internet down. She said, “oh what, now we're defending guyism?" And couldn't nobody say shit, and I was like 'go girl!' And, it hurt my feelings a little bit because I was like damn, I said it is amazing when I called you bitches and hoes, and I called you niggers and bitches, my career went perfect, but when I told you that you're gods and goddesses, I got more criticism than I've ever got in my life.
It's definitely good to hear a man speak on that because a lot of times that message gets lost and misconstrued. I can't personally speak on what a man is thinking, so it's good to either confirm or understand where that mentality is at.
And that's one thing that I would like to say to women as it pertains to that comment that there was such a big uproar about. I see this on Twitter all the time, I'll say something and three seconds after I say it people are commenting on it. You haven't even taken a minute to digest the thought. Have you ever noticed that when stuff happens to Black people in the community, it usually takes me about a week, for the most part, to speak on it. And people get mad at me, why hasn't David Banner spoken on this? Well, I haven't gotten all the facts first. I haven't meditated on it. Even if I don't agree with it, I haven't even tried to assess why this person thinks that way. Even if it's wrong, sometimes we have to figure out, ok, well there has to be something that, unless they're trying to socialize you or lie to you, there's a reason why this person thinks this way. Let me assess that.
What I learned as a man, and I think this is one of the things that helped me with my relationship with women in general, it that a lot of times as men we want to just be right. What I found out is when we love a person, and they are hurting, even if they are wrong, we being right doesn't matter. My dad and my mom—before my dad died—they started getting along really well. My mom had like a two-year patch in their marriage where it was really bad, then all of a sudden they started getting along. I went to my dad and I was like “what's going on, are y'all alright?! What's wrong, there's peace in this house!" and my dad said, “Look, if the decisions that your mom makes, if it doesn't hurt our underlying finance or it doesn't put the family in danger, she's right." He said at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter. If it doesn't affect the family, it's emotion; it doesn't matter.
Are you married?
No, I'm not married. I just want to be the man that most Black women want to marry. I want to be a Black man that stands strong. I'm not perfect, but [I want to be the man] women want to marry and that kids want to be their father. I want to be that man. [When I die] I want people to say that that's a strong African man, I am proud that he's a part of my culture.
So is it that you don't want to be married or it just hasn't happened for you yet?
Well this is what I believe, people pray so much for an angel, but then we're demons. I'm glad I didn't get married before. I couldn't have been the man that I'm going to be to whomever my wife will be, wherever she is.
"People always point their fingers at everybody, but we attract exactly who we are."
And no matter how good a woman could've been on the outside, I wasn't right on the inside. I barely am now, but I am moving into a situation where I can be a great father and a great husband. I understood the concept of [marriage], I knew what I wanted, but I wasn't that.
Another reason is that I've always been so driven. I am now getting to a point where my businesses can sustain themselves on their own. People don't know this, but I own a multimedia company called A Banner Vision. A friend of mine was talking yesterday about how there's so many positive things going on with black people but nobody wants to do stories about them. You know, about Chris Brown owning 30 Burger Kings, about what Nipsey Hustle is doing with his business, about me running a multimedia company. I did Gaterade for the World Cup. I did music for Pepsi two years ago for the NFL, except the Superbowl. I've scored video games and movies—Marvel vs. Capcom. I run successful businesses, and there is no way that I could've been a great father or a great husband with all of these things. I had to be selfish. Something had to be sacrificed. But, as much as I want to have kids, I just didn't have the time to do that properly.
You talk about silence a lot on your Instagram page. Can you speak to the importance of silence and how it helped you when you were building out the project for the God Box?
Silence has saved my whole entire life. It is in my belief that evil is just a bunch of noise and distractions, and silence is Godly. It's hard for us to even hear God because our spirit is bombarded with telephones and destructive information. We've got a million channels, the Internet, all this information, and if you look at any religion, if people wanted to get, for the most part, close to God, what are the three things they need? First of all they got somewhere silent. Then when they fasted, they got by themselves, they fasted, they prayed, and they shut the hell up. And they got still. And what's crazy is, one of my friends told me something. He said everybody always talk about Jesus, but you never do the stuff Jesus did. If you fasted for 40 days and 40 nights you would probably have clarity about your life, too. You might be able to walk on water!
What would you say to your 25-year-old self?
Nothing. Because if I said something to the 25-year-old self, I wouldn't be who I am now. People get pain and mistakes wrong. Pain and mistakes are what help you grow. When you do stuff right the first time, you don't know how you did it. It is the mistakes that make us better people.
I also think it is very important for us to love ourselves. And that's one of the reasons why, I can't say that I don't get down and the things that people say about me don't upset me at all, but I love me. And people say that's arrogant, but it's not; I like me. I'm cleaning me up on the inside. I love meditating. Most people hate meditating because they don't love themselves—they're not comfortable with their own self. So they're thinking about the wrong shit. Meditation allows me to face my fears, face who I am on the inside. God is just waiting on you. God is waiting on you in you.
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Luxury Hairstylist On Viral 'Hey Boo' Texts & Professionalism In The Hair Industry
As Black women, our hair is our crowning glory - whether we paid for it or not. We take pride in how we wear and take care of our hair. As with everything, hair care and hair styling have evolved over the years. Long gone are the days of Blue Magic (although I hear it’s making a comeback).
Now, we have a plethora of creams, oils, conditioners, shampoos, and stylists to choose from. Beyond wearing our natural curls, we have a range of options, from wigs and sew-ins to tape-ins, I-tips, and K-tips. So much choice! But you know what they say about too much of a good thing...
The Black hair industry has definitely blossomed in the last decade with a wave of new stylists and salons popping up all over the place. As much as I love that for us, many of these stylists have become the subjects of viral TikTok and Instagram tirades because of their alleged questionable behavior and bizarre rules.
Excessive policies, strange fees, long wait times, poor performance, and the infamous “Hey boo” texts. Beauty is pain, they say… xoNecole got to the root of these issues with luxury hair extensionist Dee Michelle, who’s been in the hair game for 20 years and runs a seven-figure business - all while being a mom of four.
Antonio Livingston
“I started my business with my career in the hair industry [at] very, very young age when I was maybe like eight...So, over the years, I've just built a very successful seven-figure business very quickly just by offering high-end services and creating great experiences for my clients, many of whom are high-profile professionals,” she said. “I'm also a mother of four, including a set of triplets, which inspires me daily to show what's possible with my hard work and focus.”
Dee’s business has gone viral on social media because of what many call outrageous prices for her invisible K-Tip installs.
“When I developed my invisible K-tip extensions technique, I made sure that it wasn't just about the hair or the style, but about providing a high-end experience from start to finish. So, my clients just aren't paying for the extensions or just the style itself, but they're investing into my meticulous, seamless craft and premium hair sourced from the best suppliers…I've spent so many hours mastering my craft, creating this seamless method that gives my clients long-lasting natural results, and my pricing just reflects that - the value of my expertise and the exclusivity of the service.”
The K-tip specialist stands on business when it comes to catering to her clients and giving them an experience worth the cost.
“And it's just important for me to also say that my clients are high-profile individuals who value quality, their privacy, and their time. They want a service that fits into their lifestyle and their time. They want things that deliver perfection. And I deliver that every single time.”
I’m sure we’ve all seen the various TikTok rants about people’s nightmare experiences with stylists and uttered a silent “FELT!” We asked Dee her opinion on a few nightmare scenarios that beg the response, “please be so forreal."
On stylists charging extra to wash clients’ hair:
“I think they should just include it in the price, to be honest. Because I feel like when clients go to a stylist, they're expecting you to wash their hair. Personally, if I see that washing is extra, I just wouldn't go to the salon because it just shows a lack of professionalism, in my opinion, and a lack of experience.”
“I think they should just include it in the price, to be honest. Because I feel like when clients go to a stylist, they're expecting you to wash their hair. Personally, if I see that washing is extra, I just wouldn't go to the salon because it just shows a lack of professionalism, in my opinion, and a lack of experience.”
On ‘deposits’ that don’t go towards the cost of the service:
“I think that's kind of weird, too, for deposits to not be like a part of the service. I've seen people have booking fees and I just don't understand it, to be honest. I disagree with that kind of policy…By all means, people should do what works for them, but to me, it doesn't make sense. Why does somebody have to pay a fee just to book an appointment with you? I don't get it. It feels like exploitation.”
On stylists charging extra to style (straighten/curl) wigs, sew-ins etc., after installing:
“I don't get it. Clients come to us to get their hair done, to get it styled. So why is it extra for you to style it? If you're going to charge extra, just increase your price. I feel like it could be just a lack of confidence in those stylists, feeling like people won't pay a certain price for certain things, or just their lack of professionalism as well, because people are coming to us to get styled.”
On the infamous “Hey boo” text stylists send to clients when they need to cancel/reschedule:
“Professionalism in any industry, especially the beauty industry, is everything. So texting a client the, “Hey boo” is so unprofessional, and it's damaging to the client-stylist relationship. Clients book their appointments expecting a level of respect and care, especially when they're investing their time and money and a service. And I get it, emergencies happen, we're all humans. However, it should be done with a formal apology and a clear explanation.”
“Professionalism in any industry, especially the beauty industry, is everything. So texting a client the, “Hey boo” is so unprofessional, and it's damaging to the client-stylist relationship. Clients book their appointments expecting a level of respect and care, especially when they're investing their time and money and a service. And I get it, emergencies happen, we're all humans. However, it should be done with a formal apology and a clear explanation.”
We know all too well what kinds of things will keep us from ever gracing certain hairstylists’ chairs with our butts again. So, what should hairstylists do to provide a good service to their clients? What is good hairstylist etiquette?
“For one, being on time is an important rule for stylist etiquette. It's just not okay to require your clients to be on time, and you're not on time. Also, communication. Being able to communicate clearly, respectfully, and professionally, whether that's in person, via text, or on social media. Style is etiquette. Appearance matters. So just maintaining a clean, polished, and professional look. Clients respect you more whenever your appearance reflects your work. There's just so many things, but another thing I would say is active listening. So, being able to pay close attention to what your client wants and also clarifying any questions that they might have. Just to ensure that they feel heard and to minimize any misunderstandings.”
Dee also shared some red flags to look out for when considering a new stylist.
“Even me as a client, if I'm booking somebody and they have a long list of rules, I don't even book with them. That's, for one, just such a huge turn-off. Also, stylists who have inconsistent or unclear pricing, that's a red flag. People who change their rates too much without an explanation. Poor communication. So, if a stylist is responding very slow or responding unprofessionally, or giving vague answers to questions, that can make clients question whether or not they are respecting their time and their needs.
Another red flag - an inconsistent or low quality portfolio. And I feel like, I see this a lot with stylists stealing other people's work, and their portfolio on social media is just very inconsistent.”
We couldn’t let Dee go without getting the tea on what styles she predicts will trend in 2025.
“I feel like people are going back to natural-looking styles. So, a lot of people are ditching the wigs, the lace fronts, things like that. People are still wearing them, of course, but it is becoming more of a trend to embrace your natural hair and something that's not looking too fake. That’s one thing that we're going to be seeing a lot. I would say a lot of layers are coming back, heavy layers. Those are becoming really, really trendy. And people are leaning more towards platinum-colored hair. I've been seeing lots of like blondes coming out. Also, jet black is always going to be a trend. But I would say more like natural colors, but natural colors that are still making a statement.”
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Feature image by Antonio Livingston.
Can You Really Make Your Hair Grow Faster? Depends On How You Look At It.
Four years ago, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Let's Gain An Inch A Month Of Hair Growth 'Til December, Shall We?” The main reason why I did it was because, I feel like almost every week, I will see someone on social media (male and female alike) say that Black women aren’t able to grow long hair — and boy, does it truly piss me off.
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a trillion times before: So long as your hair is growing, you can grow long hair. It might take longer than other people, yes — and I will get to win why in just a moment. However, more than anything, what affects length is length retention, and what impacts that is if you’re doing things that result in you losing the ends of your hair at about the same speed as the roots of your hair are growing in.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? If I really want some serious inches and/or I want my hair to grow faster, there are ways to do it? Believe it or not, the short answer to that is “yes.” Adding to that initial yes, YES, you will need to be methodical. YES, you will need to be consistent. YES, you will need to be patient. Yet if you’re willing to make that type of commitment and then apply at least 3-4 of the following 10 suggestions, you really could end up reaching hair goals that you’ve never been able to reach before.Inches upon inches…and even a bit faster than what you’ve been accustomed to experiencing.
I’ll Be Real With You: Genetics Dictates Speed, Texture, Color and Length — to an Extent
Okay, so let’s first get into something that can’t be helped via any tip or hack: genetics. When it comes to things like texture, color, density, and, to a certain extent, length — yes, that is predetermined by your DNA. This means that the reality is, the reason why some people can get hair down to their butt while others can’t seem to get past their bra strap is because hair has a growth cycle and some people’s anagen phase (the phase that literally determines how long your hair will grow) is simply longer than others.
When it comes to this, in particular, it’s also important to keep in mind that diet, age, and the condition of your health can also play a role in lengthening or shortening your anagen phase; however, so long as your hair is growing 1/4”-1/2” a month and you are able to retain length, you should be able to at least get a very nice lob (long bob) going.
Also, while we’re here, please don’t fall for the STRAIGHT UP LIE that only other ethnicities have longer anagen phases. Aside from the video that you just watched, examples like these here, here, here, here, here, here and here and here are living proof that regardless of ethnicity or texture, some women have hella long anagen phases — including many Black women.
And what about speed (which is the main focus of today’s piece)? Well, although there are some things that you can do to stimulate your hair follicles, which could get them to grow a bit faster, the main thing that you should be concerned with is taking such good care of your hair that you don’t end up breaking it off or causing it to weaken — because strong hair that can retain length is going to give the impression that your hair is growing faster because you aren’t losing any more of it than you actually should (which shouldn’t be more than 50-100 strands on a daily basis, by the way).
So, with all of the science stuff out of the way, here are 10 things that you can do that will either stimulate hair growth or help you maintain the locks that you’ve already got.
10 Proven Ways To Grow Your Hair Faster
1. Take a Multivitamin
When it comes to the gaslighting of health-related issues in this country — geeze, where do we start? For instance, how wild is it that “some folks” believe that taking a multivitamin is pointless? Meanwhile, pharma will push commercials down our throats — meds that come with side effects that are oftentimes worse than the health problem that it’s supposed to treat, to begin with. Not to mention the fact that research shows that over 90 percent of us don’t get enough vitamin D, almost 90 percent of us could use more vitamin E, 50 percent of us need more magnesium and around 40 percent of us are deficient as it relates to calcium as well as vitamins A and C.
So yes, while maintaining a healthy diet is the best way to get your system what it needs, if you want to “fill in some gaps,” a multivitamin can certainly be beneficial.
As far as your hair goes, your tresses need: zinc for healthy hair follicles; vitamin A to keep your scalp well-moisturized; vitamin C to boost collagen (and give your hair more elasticity); biotin to prevent hair thinning and hair loss; iron to provide your hair follicles with oxygen, and vitamin E to keep your scalp healthy and your hair moisturized — goodness! Instead of taking a lot of different supplements, decide instead to knock all of these nutrients out by taking one multivitamin on a daily basis. A list of some highly recommended brands can be found here.
2. Consume More Protein
Your hair is made up of mostly protein (keratin, to be exact), so it definitely needs some of that in order to thrive. In fact, some health experts say that if your hair isn’t growing at the rate that it should, it could be because you don’t have enough protein in your system. That said, if you’re a meat eater, steak, lamb, chicken, and turkey can all do your hair a lot of good. If you’re not, I actually penned an article with you in mind a while back. Check out “Vegetarian Or Vegan? Check Out These High Protein Foods.” when you get a chance.
Unsplash
3. Try Some Coffee Beans on Your Scalp
In my opinion, coffee is always going to be a polarizing topic. On one hand, if you drink too much of it, it can cause a few problems with your health (check out “Your Morning Coffee May Be Causing More (Health) Issues Than You Think”). On the other, if you’re looking for ways to incorporate it into your beauty routine, it can bless you in some pretty unexpected ways (check out “Why Caffeine Is Great For You On The Beauty Regimen Tip”).
Take your scalp, for example. Using coffee as a hair rinse can help to keep the pH level of your scalp where it’s supposed to be. Also, if the beans are ground up, you can exfoliate your scalp with them in order to remove dead skin cells and product buildup so that your hair follicles are able to grow — sometimes faster since the caffeine that’s in coffee can help to stimulate hair growth.
4. Add Oil to Your Shampoo
When your hair is dry, that can lead to breakage because moisture is critical when you’re trying to keep some inches on your head. And you know what? When you shampoo your hair, although it’s cleansing your scalp and tresses (and stimulating your scalp which can help your hair to grow a bit faster), it’s also stripping your hair of its natural oils — and that isn’t a good thing.
A hack? Add a carrier oil like rosemary, olive, avocado, jojoba, or soybean, so that your shampoo won’t be able to dry your hair out so easily or much. (P.S. This is also a great tip if you don’t have a lot of time to deep condition your hair sometimes.)
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5. Never Go Without Bond Builder
Another article that I want you to check out when you get a chance is “Everything You Need To Know About Bond-Building Your Hair.” Listen, my life (hair-wise) has totally changed ever since I added this extra step into my wash day. That’s because bond-building products are able to reduce breakage, make your locks stronger, decrease frizz, make your hair softer and more manageable, and even help to protect your cuticles — especially if your hair happens to be color-treated. I’m telling you, if you didn’t get anything else out of this read, get you some bond-builder products.
My (current) personal favorites are Marc Anthony's Repairing Hair Mask, Repair Bond + Rescuplex, and Repairing Leave-In Conditioner. Just for the record.
6. Apply an Essential/Carrier Oil Blend to Your Scalp and Ends
It can never be said enough that the ends of your hair are the oldest parts of it. And so, if you don’t take care of them, I don’t care how fast your hair grows out of your scalp, you aren’t going to see much progress because your ends will be weak, split, or snapping off left and right. Something that you can do to avoid all of this is to apply an essential oil and carrier oil blend to them. For instance, a mixture of rosemary and cedarwood will not only strengthen your ends, it’s great for your scalp in the sense that it will help to increase blood circulation to your hair follicles (which can help your hair to grow faster) as well as soothe your scalp if it happens to be itchy and/or irritated.
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7. Use a Conditioning Spray on a Regular Basis
Something else that I would definitely do a free commercial for: Bronner Brothers's Smooth Sheen Conditioning Spray. Whew, chile! Since my hair can never seem to retain enough moisture (check out “Is Your Hair Dry No Matter What You Do? I Can Relate.”), this spray has been a real lifesaver in between wash days because, even though it “acts” like a regular oil sheen, I’ve yet to come across a spray (that isn’t wet) that keeps my hair super soft and manageable. Yeah, if your locks are on the drier side and you don’t want to add water to them, a conditioning spray is definitely the way to go.
8. Be “Drink Conscious”
A couple of years ago, I read an article that said that when men consume, even one soda on a daily basis, that could make them more susceptible to hair loss. That got me to wondering about what can be consumed that will help with hair growth. Carrot juice is like a multivitamin for your hair thanks to the vitamins A, B, C, and E that are in it to keep it strong as well as the antioxidants that help to increase blood flow; the high amount of water, as well as the potassium, iron, amino acids and vitamins C and K, help coconut water to deeply hydrate your scalp, strengthen your hair and reduce the potential for hair loss, and the properties in green tea can help to prevent hormonal hair loss.
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9. Massage Your Scalp (at Night)
Throughout this article, I’ve mentioned a few things that you can do to stimulate blood circulation to your scalp and hair follicles. I’ve also said that when you do that, it can help to speed up hair growth to a certain extent. Well, out of all of the things that you can (and should) do to accomplish this particular mission, giving yourself a scalp massage, at least a couple of times a week (for 10-15 minutes each time), is probably the most effective.
It reduces head tension and stress, helps to strengthen your hair over time and it can even make your hair strands thicker. My two cents would be to warm up an essential oil like lavender, thyme, or peppermint, add it to a bit of grapeseed oil (which is packed with antioxidants), and then use your fingertips to gently rub your scalp. Not only does it feel amazing, the oils will deeply condition and nourish your hair in the process.
10. Reduce Your Stress Levels
If you’ve heard before that stress can lead to hair loss and even premature graying — that’s not a myth; it’s totally true. As far as hair loss (and growth) goes, that’s because, when your cortisol levels are elevated, that can extend your hair’s resting phase — which basically means that it can “stunt” your hair’s progress. And chile, from where I’m sitting, that’s just one more reason to determine that you will not allow any person, place, thing, or idea to stress you out this year! Not only is it not good for your health, but it could also totally wreck your hair goals. And nothing is worth that, right? Precisely.
Chill out. Grow hair. That’s the motto for this year, sis. Straight up.
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Featured image by Manu Vega/Getty Images