My name is representative of my culture. I was born to Black Muslim parents who eventually split (and my mother then went back to Christianity), but I wear my name with pride.
My Arabic name Yasmine Jameelah is one that I didn't always embrace, but as I connected with my family, I saw the beauty in their choice of what they named me. The fullness of my name, considering pronunciation, culture, and who I was named for, is wrapped up in love.
While initially, I never disclosed my middle name to people due to shame and assuming it was ghetto, as I unlearned, I saw more. Talks with my parents revealed I was named after my uncle Jameel, who named his son Jameel too and we were born one day apart. Additionally, my name Yasmine means 'flower', it is the Arabic version of Jasmin, and Jameelah is the feminine meaning of 'beautiful woman', which comes from Jameel, the masculine version which means beautiful man.
When I walk into this world daily, I keep those reminders with me but in white spaces, in a matter of minutes, the beauty of my name is often dismantled.
From the keychains that never include us, to the teachers in my class who often squinted their faces at the sight of my name, I never felt comfortable to speak up and say, "This is how you say my name." It wasn't until I was nearing middle school that I met a five-year-old Muslim girl who broke her name down in syllables every time someone mispronounced it. Old, young, it didn't matter, she let everyone know to put respect on her name and she empowered me to follow suit. Still, unlike her, I often find myself in white spaces with adults who butcher my name, and it's important to me to correct people, all while keeping my cool.
So, if you're looking for ways to set your pronunciations straight while not going full Birdman, follow these steps.
Allow them to introduce themselves first.
When I walk into a room and say hello, I often say to people, "Because I'm big on pronunciation, please let me know how I pronounce your name" and then I respond with, "Hi, my name's Yasmine." Going in with mutual respect for each other is a practice I've found helps set a precedent of respect from the door.
Correct them every single time.
I've often found that when people respond to their names being mispronounced, they've usually let it slide multiple times and they're pissed. But I'd suggest addressing the first offense respectfully, and not letting up. Last year, one of my professors for about the fifth week in row (in a class of less than 10 students) would call me "yazmin" to a room of people that knew that wasn't how you said my name. It had become a running joke in my class of my Black classmates saying, "How many times are you going to have to correct her?" So, I finally stopped her in the middle of her sentence and said, "Before I present today, please pronounce my name correctly. This is the fifth time you've said my name wrong." She never mispronounced my name again.
Don’t explain the origin of your name if you don’t want to.
I've had people who want to know why my name is pronounced the way it's pronounced, if my parents were being "extra" when they named me, if I am Muslim, and/or why I have a Muslim name even though I'm Christian. While all of those questions are valid, you don't owe your co-workers a response to why your parents chose the name you have. However, you are owed what you ask of and that is your name being pronounced correctly. That's it.
Place your name pronunciation in your social media handles.
We live in a world where we are often friends with our co-workers on social media, and I always leave the phonetic pronunciation of my name up so that anyone who approaches me, be it professionally or socially, knows how to say it. So, there's no room for error, and no room for anyone to feel uncomfortable, especially me.
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I've always had a love-hate relationship with wigs. Sometimes, I struggle to get them to lay flat and don't get me started with the bonding glue process. So when it comes to wearing wigs, I like to keep it nice and breezy around this b--- (word to Katt Williams), especially in the summertime.
That's why I jumped at the chance to try these three versatile wigs from Luvme Hair. Each one offers a unique look and is surprisingly low maintenance, which aligns perfectly with my philosophy that wearing wigs should make life easier. Let’s dive into the three styles below.
Headband Wig
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This was the first wig I tried on, and I instantly fell in love with it. So much so that it took me weeks to even consider trying the other two. I’m partial to colored hair, especially blonds, browns, and reds, so I was skeptical about the jet black hair. However, I think the color, combined with the curl pattern, worked surprisingly well for me.
One of the things I really liked about this wig was that I didn’t have to braid my hair down first. I could simply throw it over a low ponytail, which is the epitome of a low-maintenance style. The headband has combs inside and velcro on the ends, ensuring a secure fit.
Half Wig
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I had never worn a half wig before, so I faced some challenges. I cornrowed the bottom half of my hair where the wig would sit, but I believe this made it more difficult to use the combs. It might just be me though. I straightened the top part of my hair to blend it with the wig, which looked cute for about five minutes.
Firstly, I have a brown/blonde color mix on the ends of my hair, and the half wig is black. So, I had to hide some of the color (I didn’t have time to dye the wig). Secondly, straightening my hair myself is always a hassle because it never lasts long. Add to that the summer humidity, and you get a hot mess. Despite all this, I managed to get some cute pictures before things got out of control, and that’s all that matters, right?
Would I consider this a low-maintenance hair style? Yes and no. I think it’s unrealistic for me during the summer, especially since I enjoy summer activities. However, when the weather cools down, I’ll definitely rock it, dyed, of course.
Bob
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Now, this is the wig I was nervous about. I never had a bob and I didn't think I would like it. But once I put bobiana on, my mind instantly changed. I finally understood why the gworls rave about the bob so much. It was giving boss. It was giving grown woman. It was giving the bob means business. Iykyk. It was the ultimate statement.
I will say when I first put it on, one side of my wig just would not lay flat. It took some trial and error, but I finally managed to get it to look good. With the bob, I highly recommend braiding your hair down first as small as you can so it can lay as flat as possible. I really liked the ash blonde color, which is perfect for summer. The length also makes it a great low-maintenance style for the season, so you don't have to worry about the hair making your neck sweaty.
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