I have been natural for about four years now.
I became natural after I cut my hair into a pixie cut for the second time in college, and I was really tired of paying $80 for a relaxer that burned my scalp. I decided there had to be a better life, so I relinquished myself from the creamy crack forever.
As all my natural girls know, freeing yourself of chemicals that can be damaging to your hair is a true science and journey of self-love. I became (and still am) a self-proclaimed product junkie. Although I tried everything I saw promoted on my favorite naturals' Instagram posts, or by natural hair vloggers on Youtube, the biggest struggle was trying to find someone to straighten my hair and for it to stay straight without me spending the same price as my relaxer.
I've been to natural stylists who would charge crazy amounts that a college student/ young professional with loans just couldn't afford ($60-$80) just to do my hair. So like most naturals, I found myself at the Dominicans because: 1) They are cheap and run tons of specials, and 2) Because my hair is soft, smooth, and stays that way after the style is completed.
But that heat from the Dominican salon was a killer, and wasn't the best for my overall hair health. My ends began to split, and my hair started to break off during the transitional phase of growing out my permed hair. Just as I felt as though I was losing my hair battle, a friend began raving about a new place she started going to that treated her natural hair with love.
That's when I found the holy grail that is...
The Drybar.
I'm not even going to lie when I say, I side eyed the place the first time I walked in. The sign on the wall read, 'No Cuts, no color. Just Blowouts! Only $40."
This sounds too good to be true! What's the catch?
I also wondered:
Do they really know what they are doing with my kinks and curls?
Will the style last?
They probably don't have products for my hair.
All the answers to those questions are a resounding YES!
For $40 (or $45 if you live in New York), I was able to get a blowout with minimal heat and a lasting style that usually lasts up to two weeks with proper maintenance and care. They have products for literally everyone, and they have even blown out my hair when I had extensions/weave in for an additional $20. All of their hairstyles & products are cocktail inspired, which adds to the experience.
Since I have moved from DC to New York, I have opted into the Barfly membership. For $75 a month, I can get two blowouts (basically one every two weeks) and any additional blowouts will be $35 instead of $40. Also any blowouts that I don't use will roll over to the next month! That was a perfect set up for me! Not to mention, on your birthday, you get a free blowout.
So why am I suggesting this to all my natural ladies?
I was in complete shock the first time I walked out of The Drybar. When I arrived, the beautiful, open, crisp, white and yellow scenery surrounded by fresh flowers, snacks and smiles were very welcoming, but I didn't see anyone in the salon chairs that looked like me. And I wasn't sure if the stylist were skilled in dealing with coarse hair.
Once I checked in, I was asked if I wanted cucumber-lemon infused water, coffee, tea, lemonade, or a mimosa. As I settled into the styling chair, I was given the option to watch a chick flick, while the tunes of Beyoncé and Sam Smith played lightly in the background, as as they stylist finished, I was spun around to look at myself in the full-length mirror that was located behind the styling station. My hair felt healthy and amazing! The blowout was definitely well-worth the money.
The products were great as well, with my stylist using The Velvet Hammer: Hydrating Control Cream (which works like Moroccan Oil), followed by The Hot Toddy which they used to protect my hair before applying heat, and the 100 Proof Treatment Oil, which is great to fight against those annoying flyaways and frizz. They even have nourishing hair masks which serve as their deep conditioners. I usually get the Mudslide Hair Mask ($20), at least once a month, and they also give me a little bottle to take home with me. (Although I refuse to touch my own hair in fear of it breaking off again!)
I've had the opportunity to go The Drybar in Georgetown, DC and in Del Mar, California. I've had white stylists, black stylists, and male stylists.
Every single time, doesn't matter where I go or who the stylist is, I've received the same level of service, and I always walked out of their with my hair looking fleeky!
They are always quick and professional.
I literally recommend it to everyone I know, and a major plus are the products smell amazing!
Have you tried to Drybar before? What has been your experience?
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Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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Tasha Smith On Why Your Self-Worth Is Your Greatest Asset In Relationships
If the definition of BOOM needed a photo next to it, it better be Tasha Smith’s face.
Tasha Smith, 53, the actress known for her captivating performances and outspoken personality, has become a beloved figure in the entertainment industry. Her portrayal of the fierce and fabulous Angela in the hit movie Why Did I Get Married? is nothing short of iconic.
Beyond her role in the Tyler Perry film, Smith has established herself as a versatile actress with a range of impressive credits to her name. She has consistently delivered powerful performances in both film and television, showcasing her ability to embody complex characters and bring their stories to life.
Off-screen, Smith is equally captivating. She is known for her candid and outspoken nature, never shying away from speaking her truth. Her authenticity and willingness to address important issues have made her a role model for many.
Lucky for us, she brings that authentic energy no matter the occasion. Tasha had us saying “Amen” and “Amen again” while listening to a resurfaced interview with Donni Wiggins on theFully Transparent podcast. There, she talked about starring in Bad Boys: Ride or Die, working with Will Smith and Martin Lawrence, and being a powerhouse.
One commenter shared, “Tasha Smith needs to have her own talk show and or motivational conferences!” and we couldn’t agree more. Keep reading for some gems that stuck with us!
Tasha Smith On Self-Worth and Resilience:
“Don’t let any man burn you out or make you feel bad about yourself. Don’t take 'no' from anybody. Period. I mean it, honey. When things go wrong, don’t stay down for too long. Let the comeback be quick and big, honey. Big. We’re resilient. We are.”
On Understanding Your Value:
“You have to understand your value. Sometimes, when things don’t go right in relationships, we, as women, tend to blame ourselves. But why does that have to be the case? I remember talking to a woman who said her guy cheated on her. I told her, ‘He didn’t think he was good enough for you.’ She looked at me confused, and I said it again, ‘He cheated because he didn’t think he was good enough for you.’ That behavior has nothing to do with you—it’s about him trying to feel better about himself.”
On The Power of Boundaries:
“If we understood our value, we’d have more boundaries, and we wouldn’t accept so much. You know what I mean? Because, honestly, we create bad behavior by what we allow. Women ask, ‘Why does he keep doing that?’ Well, because you keep letting him. The apologies are working, and those apologies come with more demonic ones.”
On Breaking the Cycle of “Sorry”:
“Once you get delivered from one 'sorry,' if you keep the door open, more will come in—stronger and harder to overcome. Before you know it, you’re stuck in that 'sorry' space. If you truly understood your value, you’d be quicker to walk away.”
On Moving Forward with Self-Respect:
“For me, at this point in my life, I’m not spinning the block anymore. You can’t just keep spinning the block. You have to have self-respect, boundaries, and a sense of your own worth. If you don’t value yourself, trust and believe a man won’t value you either.”
Watch the podcast interview in full below:
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Featured image by Paras Griffin/Getty Images