We have a leader who turns a blind eye to racial injustice, face masks and coronavirus testing and thinks it's OK to blind the eyes of peaceful protesters so he can snag a photo op.
I'll walk barefoot across shards of glass and still stand in a line all night to vote him out of office.
Although standing in line all night is a bit of a stretch, more than a few hours has been the norm for 2020 voting so far. In Kentucky's primaries, there were only 200 polling places statewide, down from 3,700 in the 2018 election. But only one polling place was in Jefferson County this past week, where 600,000 of the registered voters live. Half of Black Kentuckians live there, too.
This is classic voter suppression.
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Georgians faced longer lines than usual earlier this month, also. Furthermore, they encountered ballot shortages, which was a whole other issue across many states. Tens of thousands of voters didn't receive the absentee ballots that they requested. And in Maryland, where all registered voters were supposed to have automatically received ballots in the mail, about 160,000 ballots (or roughly 5% of those actually sent out) weren't even delivered, according to CNN.
And Georgia's new voting machine glitches? Those technical issues probably could've been resolved ahead of time through machine testing and volunteer training had 'Rona not forced stay-at-home orders. Experts say these problems only occurred in our predominantly Black communities so that possibly sounds like another case of voter suppression.
Voting rights groups call the most recent primaries a disaster and a sneak-peek into what'll happen in November, particularly in counties where the majority of residents are not white, if these machine glitches and ballot shortage issues aren't fixed. Add to all of that the health officials' predictions of a vicious resurgence of the 'Rona. This pandemic is turning 2020 into pandemonium!
So, how should we prepare? What do we need to do to minimize wait times in line, protect our health and evict the tenant from the DC mansion that sits along Black Lives Matter Plaza? Here's where to start:
Make sure you and your eligible loved ones register to vote online.
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It's a fact that everyone who can vote isn't already registered. New voter registration has declined during the quarantine period. States like Virginia saw 73% fewer registrations in April than it did during the same time in 2016, possibly due to the shutdown of the Department of Motor Vehicles where most residents register to vote. And despite being able to register online, Kentuckian registrations also flatlined in April because door-to-door canvassing and in-person registration booths are much more successful. However, online registration is our best option right now.
If you're a regular of Club Quarantine, then you probably attended #CouchParty 2.0 with When We All Vote, co-chaired by our forever FLOTUS Michelle Obama. The organization reached over 100,000 eligible voters during the virtual registration drive in April. Another resourceful site is Vote.org. Both websites keep the registration process simple. Vote.org says it takes less than two minutes.
It's also best to go ahead and register now even though the deadline for the general election is in October. In case you're a procrastinator, you can get the exact date for your state here. But I repeat: Do it today!
Check your voter registration status.
Nowadays, anything can happen. We might somehow get purged from the voter roll. Or we may arrive at the polling station only for the volunteer to tell us they can't find our name. The devil is a liar, as my cousin often says. There's a link on the When We All Vote homepage that you can click to be sure you're still set to vote before you get to the polls.
Request a general (presidential) absentee ballot.
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Most states offer this option. Again, some states may even automatically send a general absentee ballot to every registered voter like they did for this year's primaries. (If you live in Washington state, Colorado, Oregon, Utah and Hawaii, then this doesn't apply to you because your states hold all of their elections entirely by mail anyway.)
Currently 28 states and the District of Columbia offer "no-excuse" voting by mail, which means any voter can get an absentee ballot if they ask for one. States with stricter laws, like my home state of Virginia, require voters to provide a valid reason on their application explaining why they can't appear at the polls. You have to choose one from the list and provide proof but don't fret: COVID-19 is still in these streets and counts as a legitimate excuse.
Be mindful of the tight deadlines because you want your vote to count! Some states need to receive the ballots back on Election Day while others accept a postmark. States like Virginia will send ballots out 45 days before the election so try to get it as soon as possible. Check your state's absentee ballot deadlines and requirements here.
Also be mindful of your signature. Now is not the time to get fancy with our swoops, slashes and squiggles if that's not how we signed our driver's license. The last thing we want is for our vote to become a provisional ballot and not be counted because the person who compared the signatures thinks ours is inconsistent.
If you don't receive your absentee ballot in a timely manner, please contact your county registrar or Department of Elections. Don't sit at home and wait like this one couple did during the DC primary and ended up not voting at all. If your ballot still doesn't come in the mail, you'll definitely need to vote in-person.
Consider early voting.
I get it. In-person voting is what we're trying to avoid because how can you realistically stand six feet apart on Election Day? Somebody is going to be breathing on the back of your neck and then asking if you mind that they stand that close to you. Early voting is usually available. With early voting, we have a window of time to choose our candidate before November 3. Check early voting dates for your state here.
Know your voting rights before you go!
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Did you know that there is an "inactive" list of voters? If your name isn't on the regular voter roll and you haven't recently voted, your name could be on the other list. If this is the case, you can still cast a regular ballot in the current election. You can also call the Election Protection Hotline at 866-687-8683.
And did you know that if you're already in line when polls close, then you can still vote? Thankfully, voters at the lone polling place in Jefferson County, KY, knew that when some smart official decided to lock the doors promptly at 6pm. They banged on the windows but apparently candidate Charles Booker had to file an injunction with a judge to reopen the doors until 6:30 pm. I'm telling y'all: Voter suppression is real!
But even if you have to vote on actual Election Day after all, do not get discouraged. Awaken bright and early on November 3 and protect yourself: mask, disposable gloves, a little sanitizer, ID and a basic knowledge of your voting rights. And the minute your thoughts shift to "I can't deal with the corona and crowds today!", picture the current tenant in the DC mansion hunkered down in his bunker issuing tear gas orders for another four years all because we're demanding our right to live. Equally.
We can't deal with that, either, sis.
Check your voter registration status or register to vote today at Vote.org.
Featured image by Shutterstock
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Kayla Nicole says she wore a dress that was once worn by Braxton herself for the Halloween costume. “It’s not a secret Toni is more on the petite side. I’m obsessed with all 5’2” of her,” she tells xoNecole via email. “But I’m 5’10'' and not missing any meals, honey, so to my surprise, when I got the dress and it actually fit, I knew it was destiny.”
The episode was the perfect way for the multihyphenate to take control of her own narrative. By addressing the viral moment on her own platform, she was able to stir the conversation and keep the focus on her adoration for Braxton, an artist she says she grew up listening to and who still makes her most-played playlist every year. Elsewhere, she likely would’ve received questions about whether or not the costume was a subliminal aimed at her ex-boyfriend and his pop star fiancée. “I think that people will try to project their own narratives, right?” she said, hinting at this in the episode. “But, for me personally – I think it’s very important to say this in this moment – I’m not in the business of tearing other women down. I’m in the business of celebrating them.”
Kayla Nicole is among xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, powered by SheaMoisture, recognized in the Viral Voices category for her work in media and the trends she sets on our timelines, all while prioritizing her own mental and physical health. As she puts it: “Yes, I’m curating conversations on my podcast The Pre-Game, and cultivating community with my wellness brand Tribe Therepē.”
Despite being the frequent topic of conversation online, Kayla Nicole says she’s learning to take advantage of her growing social media platform without becoming consumed by it. “I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out,” she says.
On The Pre-Game, which launched earlier this year, she has positioned herself as listeners “homegirl.” “There’s definitely a delicate dance between being genuine and oversharing, and I’ve had to learn that the hard way. Now I share from a place of reflection, not reaction,” she says. “If it can help someone feel seen or less alone, I’ll talk about it within reason. But I’ve certainly learned to protect parts of my life that I cherish most. I share what serves connection but doesn’t cost me peace.
"I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out."
Credit: Malcolm Roberson
Throughout each episode, she sips a cocktail and addresses trending topics (even when they involve herself). It’s a platform the Pepperdine University alumnus has been preparing to have since she graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, with a concentration in political science.
“I just knew I was going to end up on a local news network at the head anchor table, breaking high speed chases, and tossing it to the weather girl,” she says. Instead, she ended up working as an assistant at TMZ before covering sports as a freelance reporter. (She’s said she didn’t work for ESPN, despite previous reports saying otherwise.) The Pre-Game combines her love for pop culture and sports in a way that once felt inaccessible to her in traditional media.
She’s not just a podcaster, though. When she’s not behind the mic, taking acting classes or making her New York Fashion Week debut, Kayla Nicole is also busy elevating her wellness brand Tribe Therepē, where she shares her workouts and the workout equipment that helps her look chic while staying fit. She says the brand will add apparel to its line up in early 2026.
“Tribe Therepē has evolved into exactly what I have always envisioned. A community of women who care about being fit not just for the aesthetic, but for their mental and emotional well-being too. It’s grounded. It’s feminine. It’s strong,” she says. “And honestly, it's a reflection of where I am in my life right now. I feel so damn good - mentally, emotionally, and physically. And I am grateful to be in a space where I can pour that love and light back into the community that continues to pour into me.”
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image by Malcolm Roberson
Meanwhile, frankincense and myrrh originate from the Middle East and Africa (you know, like the Bible does — some folks need to be reminded of that—eh hem — Trumpers) and ginger? It too helps with indigestion (which can definitely creep up at Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner tables); plus, it’s a key ingredient for ginger snaps and gingerbread houses. So, as you can see, holiday-themed scents have a rhyme and reason to them.
Tying this all in together — several years ago, I penned an article for the platform entitled, “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry ‘Christmas Sex’?” Well, in the spirit of revisiting some of that content, with a bit of a twist, I decided to broach some traditional holiday scents from the perspective of which ones will do your libido a ton of good from now through New Year’s Eve (check out “Make This Your Best NYE. For Sex. EVER.”).
Are you ready to check some of them out, so that, whether it’s via a candle, a diffuser, some essential oil, or some DIY body cream (check out “How To Incorporate All Five Senses To Have The Best Sex Ever”), you can bring some extra festive ambiance into your own boudoir? Excellent.
1. Vanilla
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When it comes to holiday desserts, you’re going to be hard-pressed to find recipes that don’t include vanilla — and that alone explains why it is considered to be a traditional holiday scent. As far as your libido goes, vanilla is absolutely considered to be an aphrodisiac — partly because its sweet scent is considered to be very sensual. Some studies even reveal that vanillin (the active ingredient in vanilla) is able to increase sexual arousal and improve erectile dysfunction in men. So, if you adore the smell, here is more incentive to use it.
2. Frankincense
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Although, typically, when people think about frankincense (and myrrh), it’s in the context of the gifts that the wise men brought Christ after he was born; it’s a part of the biblical Christmas story. However, frankincense goes much deeper than that. Sexually, since it has an earthy and spicy scent, some people like to use it to meditate (check out “What Exactly Is 'Orgasmic Meditation'?”). Also, since it has the ability to put you in a better mood, soothe and soften your skin and maintain your oral health — with the help of frankincense, every touch and kiss can be that much…sexier.
3. Cinnamon
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I already gave cinnamon a shout-out in the intro. Personally, I’ve been a fan of it, in the sex department, for a long time now (check out “12 ‘Sex Condiments’ That Can Make Coitus Even More...Delicious”). When it’s in oil form, it can be very sweet to the taste while sending a warm sensation throughout the body — which is why the giver and receiver of oral sex can benefit from its usage. Beyond that, cinnamon helps to increase blood flow to your genital region, elevate sexual desire and, some studies say that it can even help improve fertility. Beautiful.
4. Peppermint
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If there’s a signature candy for the holiday season, it’s probably a candy cane — which automatically puts peppermint in the running for being an official holiday scent. Pretty much, in any form, it’s got your sex life’s back because it’s hailed as being a sexual stimulant; in part, because its smell is so invigorating. Plus, it helps to (eh hem) ease headaches, it gives you more energy and it can definitely help to freshen your breath. Also, that minty sensation? The same thing that I said about cinnamon can apply to peppermint too (if you catch my drift).
5. Ginger
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Whether it’s in a meal or in your bedroom, ginger is going to produce results that are hella spicy. On the sex tip, science has praised ginger for being able to increase sexual arousal, improve blood circulation (which intensifies orgasms) and strengthen fertility for many years. Scent-wise, I find it to be one that both men and women enjoy because it is both woodsy and sweet. So, if you’ve got some massage oil in mind, adding some ginger is a way to please you both.
6. Pomegranate
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September through December is the time of year when pomegranates are considered to be in season. And, as someone who is a Rosh Hashanah observer, I have a personal adoration for them because I am aware of the various things that they symbolize in Hebrew culture including the fact that they are a fruit that represents love and fertility. So yeah, they would absolutely be an aphrodisiac — one that is perfect for this time of the year. While consuming it helps to boost testosterone levels in both men and women, the floral bittersweet smell that it produces can help to reduce stress while promoting relaxation (like most floral scents do) — and the more relaxed you are, the easier it is to climax.
7. Nutmeg
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Another signature seasoning during the holiday season is nutmeg. It’s perfect in Thanksgiving sweet potato (or pumpkin) pie and Christmas morning French toast. And yes, it can also make your sex life better. If you consume it, it can intensify your libido and, overall, its warm-meets-spicy-meets-sweet smell is so inviting that it is considered to be a pretty seductive scent.
8. Cloves
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I ain’t got not one lie to tell you — if you’ve got a toothache, put some clove oil on that bad boy and send me a Christmas present for putting you on game. Aside from that, as I round all of this out, cloves are another holiday scent that can do wonders for your sex life. For men, it has the ability to significantly increase sexual arousal and improve stamina and endurance. For men and women alike, it also has a reputation for strengthening sexual desire. And for women solely? Well, if you want an all-natural way to increase natural lubrication down below — the scent and and feel (in DILUTED oil form) can make that happen. It can make the holidays especially special…if you know what I mean.
Ah yes — the atmosphere of the holidays and what it can do.
Take it all in! Scent ‘n whatever stimulating that comes with it! #wink
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